That Perfect Summer

-Damian Cross-

The ghost from the past has come to haunt us again.

That is the first thing that crosses my mind when the door swings open and he walks in, hands deep in pockets, eyes fixed on the whiteboard behind the teacher.

He passes by, still not looking at any of us. The empty desk in front of mine used to be a reminder of something missing, but when he pulls out the chair and takes out his books, I feel that the room just became more hollow and empty even as he sits down and fills the place.

"Katara, you'll be in charge of taking care of Zuko until he is familiar with his new school, is that understood?" The teacher, a balding man with a strange infatuation with bead bracelets, doesn't wait for a reply before turning back to the board and resuming the lesson.

Zuko's body stiffens a little at the mention of my name, but when I look at him again, he's back to flipping open an empty notebook and uncapping his pen, taking down notes as if nothing had happened.

I look down at my own notebook- at the rows of neat handwriting, hi-lighted key words, underlined passages, and the occasional doodle scribbled in the corner. The page I had been writing on had its corner ripped off, used as a note I passed to my friend in an earlier class. I'm halfway through writing another message before I realize what I was doing and hurriedly cross everything out.

He may be back, but everything is still different. It's impossible to return to the way we were before.

"…Friendship. The character that symbolizes this is arguably the protagonist of the story, even though it's told from the perspective of his friend. Tetsudo brings his estranged friends together in less than ideal circumstances, and it is through his sickness that they learn to share their lives again…"

This hurts more than I expected it to. I raise an arm and the teacher pauses in his lecture. "Yes?" he's confused, more than annoyed, at the interruption. I hardly ever speak up in class, and I think it took him more than half a semester to match my face to the name on his roll call sheet.

"I'm not feeling well, may I go to the nurse's office?"

He peers over his glasses, takes in my pale face, glances down at my perfect attendance record, and nods without a second hesitation. "Take your bag with you, seeing as it's last period," he advises.

"Yes, sir." I bend down to gather my belongings, swing my bag over my shoulder, and thread my way around the desks, avoiding the shortest and most direct route which leads past Zuko's desk.

I shut the door gently behind, and then I walk in the direction opposite to the infirmary.

What I'm feeling right now can't be fixed by a simple nap and glass of water.

I avoid the gates and the teacher on duty, instead turning a sharp right around the corner. A bush of colorful flowers hides the gap in the fence. It used to be just a small hole, barely enough for a kitten to squeeze through, but over the months I'd been slowly widening it and now I could easily crawl to the other side without a single person noticing me.

My cellphone buzzes in my pocket. I duck into a nearby alleyway before answering it.

"Hello?"

"Katara, where are you?"

I smile, "Hey Ty, I'm going home."

"You always do that! Lemme know the next time you plan on ditching, 'kay? Trust me, as a person who has experience in that field, it's so much more fun playing hooky with me."

"I didn't plan it… just kind of happened. Anyway, don't you have class right now?"

"Well, the old fart sent me after you because he forgot to give you the booklet, thinking his model student must be where she told him she would be, of course."

"Of course," I grin, "thanks anyway, I'll come over after you finish to get it."

"You better. And bring me a can of cacti juice."

"Roger that."

I wait until she hangs up first, then heave a sigh. The booklet, of course, how could I have forgotten?

My watch tells me that school will be over in about half an hour, so I buy myself a bag of seal jerky crisps and two cans of juice. The owner of the convenience shop barely spares my uniform a second glance, just scans the items and hands me my change. I miss the old lady who used to work here; I still keep the candy wrappers she handed out in a box somewhere in my closet.

The park nearby is empty, the swings rocking slowly backwards and forwards in the light breeze that occasionally ruffles its way across the grounds. It's still not officially summer yet, but the weather reminds us that nature doesn't follow calendars as rigidly as we humans do. Sweat pours from my forehead barely fifteen minutes of being outdoors. I find a bench shaded by an old tree, and rip open the bag of crisps.

My phone rings again. I check the caller I.D.

It's my brother.

I debate whether I should answer it or let it continue ringing. He should've known better than to call me during school hours, and more than once he'd gotten me into trouble because of his inability to read time.

Feeling rather gracious, I flip my cell open.

"Sokka," I acknowledge, "why are you calling?"

"Does a doting, loving older brother need a reason to ask how his little sister's day was?"

I take a sip of my juice. "Cut the chase."

"Ouch. Okay, so…my flight was cancelled, which means I won't be coming home next week."

I wonder if that feeling in my chest was relief, or just the satisfaction of having quenched my thirst.

"Is that so? That's…too bad."

I shift the phone to my other ear.

"But Suki managed to score super cheap tickets, so it's good that mine was cancelled."

"You mean-"

"-Yeah! Suki and I will be arriving tomorrow. Actually I'm on my way to the airport now- huh? Yeah, we're with Air Badger-Moles- nearly there? Okay, wait for a minute- hey Katara? I got to go now, but could you hire a cab to pick us up tomorrow morning?"

I sigh, "fine, whatever. Text me your flight details and I'll organize one."

"-Didn't I say I'll pay for the cab? Aw, come on Suki, I let you pay for it last time- oh, wait, I'm still on the phone. Er, yeah, that'll be great Katara. See you soon!"

I listen to the beeping tone of the phone for a minute or two before hanging up myself. The school bell rings in the distance. Knowing that the park will be overgrown with kids soon, I throw the empty packet and can into the bin and stand up.

The pebbled path that winds through the park is flanked by evergreen trees. It's the path that almost all students take to travel from school to home, since it's the shortest route and doesn't have any traffic lights blocking the way. I remember how we all used to take off our shoes and run over the rocky surface, squealing with pain, trying to out compete each other. I don't recall any of us ever running the full length in bare feet, pain always winning over endurance. It must be the sweltering heat that makes me take off my shoes and brush my feet across the path now. I wince as it catches an edge and a line of blood bubbles on my toe.

I pull my socks and shoes back on, and continue walking.

We were such fools back then.

Ty's house is the largest on her street, probably because her family is also the largest in the entire town. I can hear the temper tantrums even before I unlatch the garden gate and let myself in. I look at Ty's can of juice in my hand, then decide it's better to hide it from view for now. I'm zipping up my bag again when the front door bursts open and Ty launches herself at me, tears streaming down her face.

"K-Katara!" she whines, "save me!"

I pat her on the back. "There's a new cafe open, let's go there."

She wipes her snotty face, nods, then yells something at her parents. They shout back, but it was impossible to hear what they said through the ruckus Ty's sisters were making. Ty takes it as permission, and grabs my arm, pulling me back out onto the street.

"I can't stand them!" she mutters, stomping angrily all the way.

I know better than to ask her what happened exactly. I can already guess that it was something to do with her many sisters. Besides, Ty and I were great friends because we worked well with each other. We have a no-questions-asked policy, something to which I am grateful for.

"Here's your cacti juice," I fish the can out and hand it to her. She opens it and dumps the entire thing over her head.

"You're going to get all sticky," I say, and then I shrug, because at least she didn't splash me.

"That's the point," she replies, "My uniform is now all kinds of sticky and smells like juice. She can't claim that it's hers now."

Sensing I was treading in a dangerous zone, I hand her my bottle of water. "At least get it out of your hair. You should have just shaved the whole thing off."

She feels her prickly hair, and smiles. "Mum said I look ridiculous, how it's like halfway a mohawk and a bird's nest."

"So why didn't you?"

Ty aims the can at a passing bin and throws, watching how it arcs gracefully right into the middle of it. "I nicked at my scalp and couldn't continue."

"You should've given me the razor," I mimic shaving her head, "I would have done a better job."

Ty laughs, and shakes her head like a wet, overexcited puppy, spraying the juice everywhere. I imagine freezing the droplets in mid-air, but they still catch my sleeve, studding the grey polo shirt like yellow gemstones. Fools, indeed.

"Here it is," we take a step back to study the sign nailed above. A grey dragon curls around a sprig of jasmine, and several bold golden letters spell out the cafe's name.

"The Jasmine Dragon," Ty reads, "what an odd name. Sounds more like an antique shop than a restaurant that sells…" she peers to see the menu plastered in the window, "…dumplings and coffee. What a weird combination," she snorts, then brightens, "I like!"

"Come on," I pull the door open, and a bell jingles overhead. Ty jumps inside, leading the way.

"Table for two, please!" she says, "and where is your bathroom?"

"It's just down that way, second door to the right-"

I turn around, and freeze.

"-Thanks! Hey Katara, hold onto my bag?" Ty dumps her purse into my arms and barrels past the waiter, who is still staring at me.

I sigh inwardly, but manage a small smile. "Hey…Aang."

He runs his hands through his short hair. "Hey….Katara."

We stand and look at everywhere except at each other. I can almost hear a clock ticking away somewhere.

"Oi, newbie! Don't make the customers wait!" An older woman wearing the same clothes as Aang bustles out from behind the counter, brandishing two menus. Aang jumps, and blushes. I watch the way his ears light up first, then how his flush spreads out to his cheeks and finishes at the tip of his nose. This makes me smile for real. I guess some things, no matter what has happened, just don't change.

"Er, yes. Please follow me," Aang leads the way to a small booth on the far side, beside a wall featuring memorabilia of an old rock band. The woman, his supervisor I'm assuming, hands me the menus. She's also holding a clipboard, and frowning as she scribbles something down. From the way Aang is trying to peek at it, I'm sure it has something to do with him.

"I'll-er- I'll come back later to take your orders," he mutters, then flees.

I flip open the menu, but after twenty seconds of staring at the same line, I realize I'm still thinking about him. The last time I saw Aang must've been at Sokka and Suki's going away party two years ago. I think we exchanged greetings, some formal pleasantries, then sat in opposite corners. Hard to believe that once upon a time we used to talk nonstop until the early hours of the morning. Now even looking at him was a chore.

"Wow, their toilets are really something!" Ty slides into the seat across from mine and grabs at her menu. "Ooh, mint and ginger dumplings? So…odd! Let's get this!"

I shut my menu, "you can decide, I don't really mind."

She gives me a glance, then shrugs, "okay."

While she reads through the choices, I mentally count off the days until I leave for uni. The inter-semester break was coming up soon, in just a few days, then I have one long semester left, the holidays, and afterwards Ba Sing Se University beckons, where I'll be far from this boring, monotonous, painful little town.

"Are you two ladies ready to order?" Aang is back, this time wearing a black apron and a pad of paper in hand, he's concentrating entirely on Ty Lee. If this was some other guy, I would've chalked it up to her pretty face and generous assets, but Aang doesn't care about such things…. at least he didn't use to. I think.

"Yes! We would like combo C, and… hmm… E is pretty good as well…. but C has the lavender mince dumplings…"

"May I suggest the special D? It's a combination of combo C and E-"

"-Then it's decided! Okay, let's have that. Is that fine, Katara?"

I look up. "Huh?"

Aang's ears are still red. Ty looks at him, then at me, and a knowing glint shines from her eyes.

"We're done ordering," she declares.

He nods and hurries away, somehow tripping and banging his ankle against a nearby chair. Ty turns her laugh into a yawn.

"So," she starts, "he an ex of yours?"

I snort, "of course not." As if we would have dated, considering everything that had happened.

"Then what about the new guy?"

"What new guy?" I avoid her overeager gaze and read the track list on a CD glued to the wall.

"The one you're supposed to look after? What was his name? Something-ko," she raises her finger and traces around her left eye, "you know, the one with the sca-"

"-I need to go," I stand up, "to the bathroom," I add.

"Did I say something-"

"-No," I cut her off, "No, you didn't say something wrong. I just… my bladder is full from the juice earlier."

"Hmm.. okay," Ty lets me off, as I knew she would. I pass by the counter where Aang is filling our drink orders. My determination to go and urinate is written all over my face, as an excuse to avoid looking at him.

When I flush the toilet and come out of the stall, the woman from before is leaning against the sink, yapping into her cellphone. I try not to eavesdrop, but her high, grating voice penetrates even the thickest of walls and I have no choice but to try and wash my hands as fast as I could and escape.

"…What do you mean, surprise inspection? We've only opened for a week- what son? I don't care whose son he is, he's just a slight, skinny boy with rich parents- yeah….whatever, well he won't get any sympathy from me just because he's a little deformed- how is that mean? I'm just stating facts here-" she reaches across me to snag a few paper towels to dry her hands with, hitting me in the chest in the process. She mouths an apology which I wave away.

"Anyway, what's a high schooler know about managing a shop?… huh, I see. Well you should've have mentioned that before- I thought he'd be doing the inspection, speak clearly next time. So he'll be working here during the holidays? And I'm to inspect his progress? Is that what you mean?"

I leave her behind, gently closing the door behind me. I catch Ty taking a sip out of my iced coffee, and scowl at her.

"At least use your own straw," I mutter, "if I drink out of that now, it'll be like us kissing."

Ty just grins. I almost expect a tail wagging somewhere. "So where's my booklet?" I ask, wiping the end of the straw with a napkin.

"Oh!" She hands it to me. It's a good thing her purse is waterproof, but some of the juice is still splattered on the cover.

"More work, great," I mutter, taking out a pen and writing my name on it.

"At least he didn't assign us something totally bo-oring like last time," Ty drums her fingers against her cup, "thought of an idea yet?"

I read the assignment heading, and shake my head. "I can't think of anything that can fill…" I flip through the booklet, "sixteen pages."

"Well, I've already decided. 'My perfect summer is one where I'm an only child'," Ty sits back, drawing invisible objects in the air, "I'll be able to actually start and finish an ice cream tub, for once, and I won't have to risk bladder infection because the toilet will always be available when I need it…" she's still lost in her perfect world when the cafe door opens with a light jingle.

Crash!

Even Ty notices and swivels to stare at the broken glass on the floor. Aang is beet red, stammering apologies to his supervisor who is swelling like a bullfrog. He kneels down and gathers the pieces, as the woman strides ahead to greet the newcomer.

"Hey, isn't that-" Ty stops and glances at me, "er… well I've got my essay sorted-"

I'm not listening.

Zuko is here. And so is Aang. And me.

He hasn't noticed me yet. But he will once the woman steps out of the way and then he'll have a full view of the cafe. Of me. The woman is still talking, but I can tell that neither Zuko nor Aang is listening to her. They're too busy replaying the last time they met. Just like what I'm doing right now. The last time we were all together. That summer that was supposed to be perfect.

"No more stretched out bathing suits, empty bottles of sunscreen… Just Ty Lee, the sun, the beach, and the perfect tan!"

She knows I'm not with her, but she continues talking anyway. She's sensitive like that, and knows how I work. Everyday I'm grateful for that one lunch time when she tripped me over then apologized by buying me a can of juice. I would have been utterly alone otherwise.

"Z-Zuko," it is Aang who speaks first.

The woman, who was still in the middle of explaining how the cafe works, huffs at the interruption, but Aang, who is oblivious as always, takes a step forwards.

Zuko steps back.

Aang stops.

"Aang," Zuko acknowledges, "Haven't seen you in a while."

"Yes…" Aang is now tall enough that he can see eye-to-eye with Zuko, but instead he focuses his gaze on his chin. The reminder on Zuko's face is still hard to bear, even ten years later.

"Well, isn't this nice?"

Loud traffic noise blares through the open door, and the smell of petrol flits in. The setting sun casts long shadows, and the figure standing in the doorway has the longest shadow of us all.

"…Toph," Zuko murmurs.

She walks in. Just like at Sokka's party, she's wearing her school uniform. Unlike my uniform with its polo shirt and jersey that smell like wet animal fur in the rain, Toph has a tailored blue blazer, pleated skirt, and shining leather shoes to match. The logo for the prestigious private school seems to glow in the sunlight.

"I heard you're back," she ignores Aang entirely, "and that you volunteered to work here."

"And how are your parents?" Zuko asks, the familiarity between them is still there, even if it's a bit foreign and stiff. A pang of longing runs through me, the hint of something lost long ago floats in the air just out of my grasp.

"They're fine. They invited your family over for dinner on Friday night. Thought you'd like the heads up, so you can excuse yourself for it in time."

He nods.

Aang is still standing, lost, with the glass sharps in his bundled apron. He's right in front of Toph, but she doesn't see him. She only has eyes for Zuko, son of the CEO of Crimson Industries. I know she knows I'm there too. I can tell from the way her gaze flicks from side to side, always avoiding my corner.

"Toph-" Aang begins, then he takes a deep breath, "Welcome to The Jasmine Dragon. May I show you your seat?"

"Yes, table for two, please," she finally turns to look at him, "Zuko, why don't you join me? Surely training can wait a few more moments?"

The woman, catching sight of Toph's uniform, frowns a little but allows it. "Half an hour," she says, then settles back in her chair behind the counter. She acts like the intrusion was a big deal, but she gets drawn into her little sudoko puzzle quickly enough.

Ty has stopped talking, too fascinated with the heavy atmosphere to continue. She's bursting to the seams to ask questions, but our unspoken rule forbids her to. I must be the one to breach the topic first.

"They're people I used to know," I explain, "we used to go to the same school."

"Ah," she says, nodding as if that answers everything, "I see."

And because she knows me so well, she eats my share of the dumplings too.

All that's left, I think, as I watch Aang watching Toph, who is watching Zuko, who is looking at the menu, are memories of a past long gone.

"Let's go," I stuff my booklet into my bag. Ty eyes my unfinished drink, but follows suit. I leave the money for our bill on the table, not caring that I wouldn't receive change, and head outside.

I didn't expect Toph nor Zuko to acknowledge me, but when even Aang turns his head away, I feel a little disappointed. An idea for my summer assignment pops into my head, but I immediately dismiss it. That summer was over. I need to find a new one.

I'm halfway out the door when she speaks aloud.

"Katara."

I don't even turn around. "Toph," I return, then let the door swing shut.

Four out of six, I count, tomorrow we'll all be here.

All here, but not together.

Inside my bag, my booklet is wrinkled and rolled into a ball.

Perfect summers don't exist.

That day will forever be burned into my memory, like a jagged scar on my heart.

Like the scar on Zuko's face.

For an entire year after the accident, it was all that I could dream about. The explosion, the screams, the blood, the sirens… after a while, all of those painful flashes blurred together into a tight wad that I tried to bury with time. Instead, what I hid away was not memories of that day, but me. What I used to be. What I used to feel. What I used to like.

The day after the first anniversary, I used all of my pocket money and walked to the hairdressers. I emerged with my long curls shorn, wearing a short bob that changed my appearance entirely. I traded in my blue clothes, my blue toys, and exchanged them for black ones. I stopped waiting up at night for Sokka to come home. I stopped greeting him in the morning. I stopped trying to force him to eat his vegetables.

I stopped living, so I could stop remembering.

And I became good at it.

But now he's back. Now everybody is back.

And on the way home, I catch myself admiring a blue dress.

Even dad is surprised when Sokka turns up at the door without Suki.

"I thought-" he began, then stops..

Sokka just shrugs, "she's staying at her grandmother's. Now that we don't have to share rent to survive, there's no point in living together."

Dad misses the bitterness in his voice. I don't. Suki and Sokka, that was what we used to call them, when you found one, you can be sure to find the other. They were more like siblings than Sokka and I ever were, and everybody knew that they would be closer than that eventually.

Except they didn't. They still hung out together, still lived together, but they were friends, nothing more.

At least that was what they claimed.

I help my brother heave his luggage into his room. It's still the same two years ago when he left. The bed is still unmade, the shelves still cluttered with figurines. Time stood still here, and now Sokka was back to make it start up again. Already he is replacing the comic book posters with blown-up copies of his favorite baseball player, filling the pen bin with stationery printed with his university logo, dumping the old ones without a second glance.

"So…how's my little sis?"

"Zuko's back," I say without thinking.

I try to read his face, but he's older and better at it than me. I detect nothing except for a mild curiosity in his expression.

"Is that so?" Sokka replies with a smile, "that's great! I haven't seen the guy in ages. Where'd you see him?"

I fold his clothes and walk to the other side to put them in his dresser. "Class."

He's silent for a few moments, organizing his textbooks. "Katara?"

"Yeah?"

"…Be nice to him."

"Of course," I push the dresser shut, still facing away, "I owe him that much, after all."

"I think we all do," Sokka murmurs, then he claps his hands together, "so what's for lunch? Man, the meals on the plane were like cardboard compared to your stews!"

"That's great, Sokka," I say, not listening, "yeah, stew."

Ty's gone to the beach with her family, and she's texting me her woes all throughout the car ride there. I stopped replying to the twentieth text complaining how disgusting her sister's puke was.

It's the weekend, and I have homework due on Monday. Yet I find myself wandering down the street, passing by that cafe, pretending that I wasn't headed there in the first place.

"It won't be open until noon," Toph is leaning against a rubbish bin, not caring how a banana peel sticks to her pristine uniform. She's lit a cigarette and takes a drag.

"Want one?"

I look at the offered stick, and take it. She hands me a lighter, but I decline it. I dangle the cigarette between my fingers, trying to figure out why people enjoyed blackening their lungs. I guess it felt sort of empowering.

"Why are you still in uniform?"

She glances down as if realizing what she was wearing just now. She shrugs, "I like it."

"It's blue," I say, "I'm surprised you do."

She exhales deeply, blowing smoke into my face. I try not to flinch. "If you don't want it," she nods at my unlit one, "then give it back. It's high quality you know."

"I know," but I don't hand it back, and nor do I light it up. She stares at it, then gives me a small smile.

"You've changed," she observes.

"Haven't we all?"

"Yes, but you more than most," she drops the butt onto the ground and grinds it with her shoe. "I'm meeting Zuko soon."

She doesn't invite me. I didn't expect her to.

"Tell him that we have assembly in the morning on Monday, so go to the hall instead of homeroom."

She flips open her cellphone and starts texting. She could have told him verbally, but this was her way of showing how different we are. The daughter of the richest man in the town obviously has the number of the son of the biggest company in the country. I could ask her for his number, and she would give it to me, but she knows that I won't ask.

Hey, Katara, wait for me!

"I recommend their iced teas," Toph points into the empty cafe.

"Thanks," I say, and then, because I guess she has the right to know, I tell her that Sokka and Suki are in town for the holidays.

She cracks a small smile. "So, the Gaang is back together again."

"We're all here," I agree.

"But we're not together," we turn around. Aang is there, in his work clothes. His face is red, and his hair is messy. He looks like he just rolled out of bed.

"No," Toph stands up straight, "we're not."

"Everyone is here," Aang continues, moving to block her way, "after ten years, everybody is back."

"If you think we should run off to the clubhouse and play and pretend that nothing ever happened, then you'll be sadly mistaken."

"Of course I don't think that's possible!" But I know he's lying. He believes in us. That's why he was our leader after all, that's why we named our group after him. Ten years on, and he's still as optimistic as the little boy he once was, while the rest of us grew up.

"It's just- We should just hang out. Together. One…one last time," he gestures to the cafe, "Zuko will be coming here soon, won't he? And now that Suki and Sokka are back-"

"-Sorry to disappoint, but I'm not staying," I brush past him, "I have homework." I eye him, "you should come back, Aang, before you get expelled."

Toph raises an eyebrow, "still skipping school?"

He refuses to back down, "it's Saturday. You have tomorrow off, too."

I study him. He's really speaking to me. Like he once was, not like two strangers who knew nothing of each other but only their names.

My phone buzzes in my pocket. It's Ty again. Describing the contents of the vomit in generous detail.

"Fine," I sigh, "but I can't stay long."

Aang fishes out keys and unlocks the door. I check my watch. There's still more than two hours until it officially opens.

"Wait out here for a sec," he steps in, and leaves Toph and I alone outside.

There's a rubbish bin nearby, so I pick up the butt and dispose of it. When I come back, Toph is staring at me.

"What?" I ask irritably.

"Nothing," she looks away first, which surprises me.

"Azula says it's okay, just keep quiet and stay out of the way," Aang gestures us to enter, and locks the door behind us.

Only the lights above the counter are switched on, so the furthest corners are nice and dark. All the chairs are upside-down and propped onto the tables, and the supervisor -Azula- is sweeping the wooden floorboards. I thought she was at least in her mid-twenties yesterday, but now I realize that she's actually only a few years older than me-probably around Sokka's age.

"What?" she snaps, catching me looking at her. I guess that since the shop isn't open yet, she doesn't have to treat me like a customer. I think she's trying to intimidate me with her glares.

"Just admiring the view," I smile as sweetly as I can. She squints at me, then nods her approval. I've passed her test, I think. She flips her hair, showing off her glossy locks, then continues her sweeping.

I turn around to find Aang with an eyebrow raised at me. The change in him momentarily stumps me. He's been as meek as a mouse in the recent years, and now he's actually looking at me in the eye. I wonder if it's because Toph is with us. She always brought out his cheeky side.

"I want an iced tea," Toph announces, unbuttoning her blazer and flinging it in Aang's face. He catches it-barely- and obediently folds it.

"Do you want anything, Katara?"

"No."

The door opens, and Zuko comes in. He's wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Azula immediately bites his head off for inappropriate wear.

"Whatever," Zuko looks at us sitting in the corner, and frowns. Toph waves at him, which he doesn't bother to return. He's still ignoring me rather pointedly. Not that I mind, of course.

Aang returns with Toph's drink. He pours a glass of water for me, which I accept, only because I need something to do and I don't want to resort to fake texting, and least not yet.

"W-why don't you join us, Zuko?" Aang manages.

Zuko stares at him, then at Toph, and then somewhere above me. His eyes flick towards Azula, at the broom, and finally nods. Anything to get off work, I suppose.

There's an empty seat next to me, but Zuko chooses to squeeze in next to Aang and Toph, so it's just me facing the three of them. My cell phone feels heavy in my pocket.

"I told father I have a class party," Zuko speaks over Aang to Toph, who is stirring her tea.

"Is that so? Pity, it'd be nice if you flashed your face once in a while."

Aang winces.

I sigh. "Did you get Toph's text about the assembly?"

Zuko starts, then blinks. "Yes."

Aang looks down at the table. Toph slurps at her tea.

"I'm supposed to take you for a tour around the school during break."

"Is that so?"

"Yes."

The poster on the wall beside me must be very interesting for him to stare at it for so long. He's angled his head so that his left side is turned away. All of a sudden a coldness washes over me. I want to ask about his scar-but I've lost the right to talk to him as a friend.

Silence stretches between us. There's only a wooden table separating me from them, but it feels like I've been banished to the opposite side of the world. Zuko rests his hands on his side, and if I reach out, I can touch his fingers easily. The obstacle of wounds and time makes such an act impossible though, so I drop my hands into my lap, feeling the edge of my phone instead.

"So, er, Zuko. Why do you need to work here?" Aang, always the bridge between us, pipes up.

"I have to. Father said that I have to work from the bottom."

"O-Oh, I see. Well it'll be fun to hang around you again, even if it's work."

I can't stand it anymore. I take out my phone and start texting Ty. I'm using smiley faces way too much, but I don't care. After I hit send, I scroll up and re-read her messages. Aang and Zuko are still talking, and in just a few minutes, Aang has stopped stammering, and Zuko has relaxed enough in his presence to tear his gaze away from the poster. Toph has reached the bottom of her drink, and is now crunching on the ice, occasionally butting in to make a sarcastic comment.

There's no place for me here. The seat can fit three people easily, but now it just feels cramped. I take slow, deep breaths, but every time I try to inhale, something in my throat catches. I need to leave, now.

Hey, Katara, wait for me!

My phone buzzes. I lunge for it. Toph looks at me.

Ty has sensed my call for help. But her replies are useless. Have fun :)

I snap my phone shut without replying. If I knew how, I would.

"Why don't you ask Sokka and Suki to come here?" Aang breaks away from the conversation.

I want to refuse, but calling them gives me an excuse to leave the table. I nod.

Azula is back in her seat behind the counter when I get up to make the call. She slides a menu across to me. I accept it without a seconds thought. I need it as a distraction afterwards.

Sokka answers almost as soon as I finish dialing.

"The Jasmine Dragon?" he asks, "Yeah, yeah, I'll be there. Suki, too."

"Okay," I say. I'm about to hang up when I notice that Sokka still hasn't finished speaking.

"It'll be like the old times, won't it?" There's doubt in his voice. Even he doesn't believe his own lies sometimes.

"Definitely," I answer, then snap my phone shut.

I clutch the menu tightly in my hand, and as soon as my butt hits the seat, I flip it open and read every item on it like I'm memorizing my vocabs for school. Only Aang looks at me with an expression that I don't see on his face often: disappointment. He wants me to contribute, but Zuko's made it pretty obvious that he doesn't want me there. He has yet to look at me, after all.

"They're coming soon," I answer, and turn the page.

When I finish reading everything twice, I get up to return the menu. Azula doesn't ask me what I want, she just puts it away and bites the end of her pencil. She still hasn't finished her sudoku puzzle. I wonder what she is doing in the cafe hours before the opening. I also wonder whether she'll lend me the rest of the paper.

"So how's your new school?" Toph sets down her empty glass. The condensation leaves a ring on the table.

Zuko shrugs, "Can't say. Haven't been there for even a full class yet."

"Is that so?" Toph looks slyly at me, "I hear that you're in the same English class."

He doesn't take the bait, "yes."

But she wasn't finished. "Aang would've been in that class, if he went to school."

Aang falls silent. Heat rushes to my cheeks.

"Why do you feel the need to do that?" I say it quietly, but everyone hears anyway. Zuko looks at me for the first time, but I'm too busy glaring at Toph.

"What?" She leans back, smirking, "I'm just stating observations."

"Haven't you done enough already?"

They're all looking at me. I reach for a napkin and wipe away the ring on the table. Toph just crosses her arms, like she's won. And she has.

"I'm going home," I ball the damp napkin. "I'll get somebody else to give you that tour."

Zuko blinks, then nods. It's for the best, after all.

I bump into Suki on the way out. She opens her mouth to say hi, then closes it after catching my face. Instead, she steps aside, but not before reaching out to squeeze my hand. I choke back a sob. Suki is the only one of us who hasn't changed. Sokka pretends, but his guilt still shows through. Suki is the only one who doesn't bear the wounds the rest of us carry. She's free.

"Hey Katara-" Sokka is stopped by Suki. She shakes her head, and he lets me go.

All throughout the walk home, I think about Toph's words.

She's right, as always.

I'm the one who has changed the most. Even Zuko, the one who carries the scar, shows his old self from time to time. Aang can still giggle. Toph can still smirk. Sokka can still crack jokes. Suki can still smile. I can barely talk to them.

It makes sense though.

I am the reason why he was burned.

They'll never forgive me.

Because I ruined our perfect summer.