Title: I want you ...
Genre / Pairing: Romance Jack & Sam
Season 8
Disclaimer: The characters in the series belong to the Stargate universe.
Author's note: small slip of the tongue from Miss Carter ...
Enjoy :)

PART 1: SAM

My name's Samantha Carter, I'm colonel in the U.S. Air Force and I have a huge problem : I'm desperately in love with my CO.
I know what you'll say "Yes, but the regs, blah ..." I know the song, I sing it every morning for 8 years, since the day I met him actually!
I'd love him at first sight and as I work closely with him, I can't forget him.
He's General, so he's in charge of the top secret facility where we work. He promoted me to the rank of lieutenant-colonel and I'm his 2IC. I have busy days because I'm also an astrophysicist.

That's the summary of my life - Yes that's all ! Well, no, but he's the center of my universe.

I was engaged to a policeman, but I broke up because I opened my eyes. I realized that this relationship was going nowhere. Jack dated a woman, but she left him when she suspected his feelings for me.
We can't be together legally, but it doesn't erase our feelings. Because yes, I know for years that it's mutual. Pathetic, isn't it?

Anyway, today I made a huge mistake and I must admit that I hesitate between two solutions: kill myself or move to another country and adopt a cat, I will call after him. No, seriously, I'm exhausted and my concentration's paying the price ! I'm ashamed! Perhaps I'd better tell you from the beginning.

1 / Slip of the tongue

I woke up at 6 am, like every morning. I slept in my quarters at the SGC, no time to go home yesterday for returning at dawn this morning.
I took a quick shower and then I went to the mess for a coffee. At this early hour, I was alone and I loved it. I always need some time to wake up. I then went to my lab.
I work for a few weeks on complex math and I thought I had found the solution. I worked for hours. I ended up with an unimaginable headache.

My friend Daniel picked me up for lunch. He was also working hard and hadn't seen the time passing.
He reminded me that we had a meeting with Jack then, so we quickly ate, not to be late.

Although it wasn't a serious matter, since General O'Neill cultivated the art of being late. Daniel and I were on time in the briefing room and waited a few minutes. O'Neill arrived late but blamed a conversation with the President. Yes, the President of the United States himself. Of course, nobody was going to check his alibi ...

We had to point on top secret missions with slides, all in the dark, which was nice for my headache. I had a doze, after a moment. Daniel gave me a nudge to keep me awake.
I think the General saw nothing, he also had to fight to stay conscious, in my opinion. He hated this kind of briefing and he usually left it to me, especially if it had to deal with sciences.
The meeting ended and when we turned on the light, my headache intensified.
General O'Neill must had realized it because he asked me to go get something to treat it and come back for further meetings.
I left quickly. He had to show us our new bullet proof jackets.

When I was back, I found him in the gate room and I stayed in a corner. He already had briefed me at dinner the day before. Presently, I wasn't listening to his speech he had repeated with me, so I let my mind wander. I stared and I nodded my head regularly to pull the wool over his eyes.
I thought he was damn sexy. He had removed his uniform jacket, to keep his black t-shirt, close-fitting. I admired his bulging muscles. He resumed training with Teal'c, because as he remained locked in his office, he wanted to stay in shape.
There, he was perfect with his white short hair. I had unmentionable pictures in mind while I was watching.
I imagined his powerful hands tearing my clothes, his warm skin against mine, his lips exploring my naked body - I tried to picture the thrill that would give me his caresses - I went astray in the delights that I will never know - I wasn't breaking any rules, since I was only dreaming. Dreaming? What am I saying?! I fantasized about my CO !

He smiled at me and I smiled back. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow, as if my smile was strange.
Had I something stuck between my teeth? Oh, not that! Absolute disgrace! I ran my tongue on my teeth to be sure - it seems that I had nothing.
At the end of his show, the officers went to congratulate him. I stayed staring at him, from my corner, lost in my thoughts. Daniel invited me to go find Jack a few minutes later. General O'Neill had thanked me for my support and my presence.

I wanted to congratulate him, shaking his hand but my fantasies were stronger than me and I said: "I want you."

Daniel had turned his head towards me, as if he had misunderstood. O'Neill had opened his eyes, as surprised as Daniel and I corrected, but too late: "I-thankyou!"

When I wanted to remove my hand from his to escape, he pressed a little harder, to keep me close to him.

"Slip of the tongue, Carter?" he whispered to me.

At this time, a sergeant had called the microphone to warn him of an important call, I finally had the opportunity to escape, yes !

I ran into the base, to reach women's locker rooms. I wanted to take a shower to cool me off.
One one hand, I revealed my fantasy concerning my CO to him and on the other hand, the touch of his hand on mine and his breath on my neck drove me crazy.
I undressed quickly and threw myself under the warm water, facing the wall. I started soaping me, but I felt my breasts stretched to the limit ... As I gently ran my fingers over to stroke, a man's voice sounded in my back.

"Do you want some company, Carter?"

I recognized my CO's familiar voice.

2 / Acting out

"I ... uh ... Sir ! What are you doing here?" I said, without looking back. I heard him moving the shower curtain.

"I offer my help, if you need someone to soap your back..."

"Sir, I would like to take a shower and go home, hide under my sheets and forget my words, if that doesn't bother you." I closed my eyes, realizing what I said.
I understood that he had heard my words very well, I had hoped that this was not the case - I dreamed all awake now.

"Carter, I also want you," he said, when he had just slipped behind me in the shower, closing the curtain behind him. He was naked too. In fact, I felt very clearly some part of him against my lower back - There was no doubt, my desire was shared.

"I'm sorry for my words, sir ! I think the headache, fatigue and medication make me lose control !"

He was a little closer to me and had me pressed against the wall, he laid his hands on each side of my head on the wall. I swallowed with difficulty, to feel him against me. I wasn't afraid, he wouldn't do anything against my will. But now, my will to resist frayed as I felt his skin on mine. My breathing was uncontrolled, my heart was pounding. I was going to crack!

"Don't be sorry, I know how our situation is frustrating for years. I really want you but if you don't want me now - I'll leave you alone."

He wanted to leave me but I spun around and grabbed his face to attract him. He began to caress me. Everywhere! Oh God it was so good!
I wanted his lips on mine, on my breasts and all over me. I wanted him against me, in me. As he was able to read my thoughts, he kissed and caressed my breasts, always tense with desire.

"Take me now, right now !" I asked him in a whisper.

He had stopped running his hands over my breasts to guide him in me. He grabbed my mouth to kiss me with ardor. He pressed me against the wall of the shower, grabbed one of my legs and climbed. He was seated with his arms and began his movements. It was a bit brutal but so good: exactly what I was looking for at this moment. He groaned with pleasure since he penetrated me.
I wanted to moan but I bit his shoulder to stifle my cries. While I felt the orgasm rising in me, I moved head back but he put his hand over my mouth. He heard the door open and two female voices echoing in the room. He hadn't ceased his come and go.

I grabbed his shoulders with all my strength and I planted my nails into his skin as we both reached orgasm. The two women didn't remain any longer in the locker room and were already gone when Jack left my arms, kissing me as if his life depended on it.

"I gotta go, I'm already late for a briefing" he said with a sigh. He dried with my towel and got dressed. He kissed me passionately before leaving the locker room as quietly as he came.

Well, I had made my mistake ! So I have to seriously think about my two options: kill myself or moving.

3 / Consequences

I left the shower to dry off and get dressed. I had to go back to my lab to continue my work. I knew I was going to see him again as we always dined together with Daniel and Teal'c. He never missed a meal with us.

I didn't know what to think. I loved him and I just made love with him. Some tension eased in me but fear came over me ...
What exactly was I afraid of? The court martial? Yes, no doubt, given the circumstances! Fear of the unknown? Yes also ... Fear that our relationship may not work? Yes...

In fact, I was afraid of everything but mainly to let me go. I had to let go but not to let myself be guided by my fear. It made us make bad choices and made us irrational beings. I wasn't able to focus the rest of the day. Head full of questions about he and I. And full of new sensations.

I was at a point where I was lost, I didn't know at all what to do!

My phone rang and I hang up, hands shaking when I read the name on the digital display. It was him, or rather his office ...

"Colonel Carter, the General asks you in the briefing room immediately" announced his new assistant, Lucy.

"I'm coming," I told her, trying to keep a neutral tone.

Along the way, I crossed Lucy and she gave me a bad look. I was sure she had designs on Jack and she couldn't bear to see him count on me rather than on her.

I quickly rejoined the room and found it crowded with militaries in uniform. The General was seating at the end of table. He turned to me when he heard me coming and stood up to give me his chair.

"Carter, you come at the right moment" he said, without looking at me. "Tell them the story of wormholes and apples, please."

Seeing my hesitation, he patted the back of his seat to invite me to sit there. I obeyed.

He folded his hands on the back, above my head, to continue to face the audience. This proximity made me uncomfortable.

I then explained to everyone facing me, and they were many, the theory of wormholes.

"That's just a metaphor. The wormhole is only form between two open gates. Imagine the galaxy is an apple, we burrow our way through the apple like a worm crossing from one side to the other, instead of going around the outside. Now, the diameter of the apple is just a 2-D representation of space-time. The hole isn't really a hole, but an inter-dimensional conduit" I concluded.

"That's why it's better when she's explaining" the General said when I had finished.

"And she's also a lot prettier than you" a military snorted.

"You're right, be a smartass, Boyd ! In close combat, she would kill you ! Well, what if we have dinner!?" the General asked.

I waited a moment to get up, not knowing if I was included in the invitation.

"Thanks, Carter for this brilliant presentation. Give my apologies to Daniel and Teal'c, I cannot have dinner with you tonight."

"Yes, sir, it will be done" I said, watching him, going away, without even looking at me.