A part of me

Summary: But Hyourinmaru is different. Hyourinmaru soars through the sky before he lands and wraps around me… And we fight as one.

Disclaimer: Bleach isn't mine; I am but a humble writer finding her ways in the world of fanfiction. I'm awfully lost right now, directions would be most appreciated.

Also, Happy birthday to TOSHIRO

Most Bankai is an extension of the zanpakuto, it pours out of there, is used as a weapon like the shikai. It is but another weapon to use, a powerful weapon of its wielders soul. The sword itself doesn't become one with its wielder in a sense. The Bankai isn't a part of the wielder.

But Hyourinmaru is different. Hyourinmaru soars through the sky before he lands and wraps around me. He pours his strength into me, sinks into my inner core and settles there. He embraces me, the coldest hug you could ever experience, one that most couldn't withstand.

And we fight as one.

When I call him and he comes to me, I can feel every part of Hyourinmaru in me. His wings; arms but larger and wider, designed for soaring through the skies. His tail; an extra-long leg that whips and slashes like it has a mind of its own. The cold that seeps into my skin and strengthens me.

And as he becomes a part of me, I become a part of Hyourinmaru. He can feel my heart beat; he can sense the blood that flows through my veins, the lungs that suck in air he doesn't breathe.

He notices and acknowledges the respect I have of him, the awe he fills me with.

He can feel the love I have of him, enough to break any rule, destroy any barrier, sweep away any boundary.

Sure I had my doubts in the beginning, but who doesn't.

It was because I didn't realise that I had a friend within me that I had been subconsciously looking for, one I would ask for advice when I was young without expecting a reply.

But bit by bit I began to hear…..

A voice

It crushed me

It enveloped me

It rumbled in the distance like thunder

It was like a flower touching my palm

It was Hyourinmaru…

And when I finally called his name, was filled with is strength, could feel his love, I realised how lonely I had been, how much I desired a friend.

And I finally had one…

And when I learnt shikai, I watched in awe as he circled me, followed the movement of my sword but also flew free. He was around me, protecting me and I became stronger with him at my side.

And when I learnt Bankai and he poured his strength into my body, merged with me, it was if my eyes were opened. I could see as he saw, I could feel power that only he as Hyourinmaru had ever experienced.

Hyourinmaru helped me find my wings, something I had longed for. Not literal wings though he helped me with that too but he gave me confidence, something I didn't have much of before. He helped me out of my shell, broke my walls and gave me a chance to be me.

Sure I still hide behind a mask of a cool personality and a raging temper but around Hyourinmaru, I'm myself. A little immature at times with an obsession of dragons and a talent for debating.

I rely on him, not as a tool to use but as someone who helped me, calmed me, acknowledged me. I felt lonely when he was silent, I laughed whenever he made one of his rare jokes, bowed my head in shame when he scolded me. I chatted to him as one might chat to a friend.

And that's because he was one. He was and still is my best friend.

I began to realise that Hyourinmaru wasn't just the spirit of the zanpakuto I wielded. He was in a sense, an extension of myself, a manifestation of my personality. He was sometimes unsure as I often am, cold as I am and wise as I was not.

But at the same time it was as if we were two parts of one whole, a puzzle that fit together perfectly.

A heart that had found its match…

And I don't ever think I'll find someone to give my heart too.

Hyourinmaru has my heart, not in a girlfriend, boyfriend way but in a way that some could never understand, not in their entire life.

Hyourinmaru is a part of me and I am of him.

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