Title: No One Else

Author: some1lostme

Rating: K

Summary: Felicity and Oliver share an experience that no one else can understand. He is the only one who knows what she's been through and she now has a much more intimate understanding of what exactly he survived on the island.

Spoilers: 2x09 "Three Ghosts"

Disclaimer: Of course, I don't own Arrow or any of these characters. I'm just borrowing them and promise to return them unharmed.

Chapter Four

She has to pull away from him to breathe, her lungs and her heart working in tandem to keep her from passing out. Oliver's hand is still cradling the back of her head, his forehead resting against hers. She can't make a coherent thought come out of her mouth so she simply sits with him on her small sofa, shivering every time he squeezes her fingers.

Her brain is in overdrive trying to process exactly what is happening. Oliver just kissed her. He told her that he'd been afraid of losing her to Slade. He had said that he'd been worried that she would leave after what had happened. And she had considered it. She'd thought about leaving, about telling Oliver that she was done being his Girl Wednesday, that her life and her safety were too important to her. But the thought of giving him up had hurt her almost as much as the lashes that had damaged her body. He is her friend, he is more than that but she can't find the right word. Is that what this is? Is he trying to tell her that they can finally move past this awkward friends-but-maybe-more-than-friends phase?

She takes in a breath, opening her eyes slowly. Oliver's eyes remain closed.

"Tell me what this means," she insists and she's proud of how strong her voice sounds, "Because if this is just some desperate attempt to get me to stay then I – I'll kill you, Oliver, I swear that I will. Tell me what this is."

He opens his mouth but closes it again. She knows that talking things through isn't exactly his strong suit. She's also familiar with the expression 'actions speak louder than words' but in this case, his actions have only served to confuse her further. She needs clarification.

"What do you want me to say that I haven't already said?"

She isn't surprised that a bit of his temper is showing. He's already out of his comfort zone and she's asking him to step a little farther outside of the lines. But this Oliver she can deal with. She can handle angry Oliver.

"I want you to tell me that you're not in love with Laurel anymore. I want you to explain what you're feeling now. What are you trying to tell me? Pretend that I can't read between the lines and just make me understand."

His eyes open and suddenly she is staring into the haunted blue depths. Another shiver runs through her. This is a part of his damage, one of the many parts. As his friend she's learned to deal with the many different sides of him but if they move forward, if they become something more than friends, he's going to need to learn to really let her in.

"You think that I'm still in love with Laurel?" he asks quietly, his tone not one that she had hoped to hear during this conversation.

She sighs and pulls away from him completely. She can't have this conversation with him while he's touching her. She's grateful that he doesn't move with her as she settles gently against the arm of the couch.

"I need to know how you feel about her because I won't compete with her. That wouldn't be fair to me."

His answer doesn't come right away. Her heart is in her throat as she waits for him to give her the truth that she needs to hear. He avoids looking at her for a long moment, focusing instead on a framed photo of her and her father that is hanging near the door. Eventually, he turns his attention back to her. His hands are fists in his lap.

"I thought that I was still in love with her when I came back. When I came back the first time, I mean. I credited Laurel for getting me off of that island alive. She – getting back to her had motivated me for a long time to do whatever the hell I could to survive. So yes, at first, I was still in love with her. But I wasn't the only one who changed in the five years that I was gone. The Laurel that I left wasn't the same Laurel that I came back to. She'd changed, too. I came back thinking that she wouldn't be any different than she had been when I'd left. I'd let myself believe that I could make things better between us. And in a way, things are better, but they'll never be the same. She still blames me for Sara's death. She still blames the vigilante for Tommy's. But Laurel's mind isn't going to be changed. She may have forgiven me enough to be my friend but she'll never forgive me enough to be anything more."

She sits silently and prays that he's going to continue. His words haven't exactly made her feel better.

He runs his fingers through his hair, blowing out his breath before going on.

"I still love her. I think in some way I always will. She's been my friend for a long, long time. I can't just dismiss that. But I'm not in love with her. I don't have any romantic feelings for her. It took longer than it should have for me to realize that but I know it now. How could I really love someone who can't stand something that means so much to me? How could I love her knowing that she would never truly forgive me for Sara? Laurel and I … we were a good idea. To be completely honest with you, if I hadn't gotten on my dad's yacht that day, if things hadn't happened the way that they did, I probably would've married her. And it would've been miserable because even before Sara, things between Laurel and I weren't perfect. They were obviously pretty messed up if I didn't think twice about cheating on her with her little sister."

She closes her eyes as relief settles over her.

"Thank god because if you hadn't realized that for yourself, I really was going to have to kill you. I mean, not that I actually could kill you because, well, look at you. You're like three times my size plus, you know, you've got that whole killer arrow thing going on."

She bites her lip and stops talking. Her normal tendency to ramble is heightened by the painkillers currently buzzing through her system. She is still unsure of how he wants to continue, what exactly it is that he wants, but she's happy that the brick wall that was Laurel Lance has been demolished.

"Where does that leave us?" he asks her.

She shrugs, "You tell me. I know that I haven't exactly been subtle when it comes to how I feel about you. Clearly subtly is not one of my strong suits. But you aren't so forthcoming. You need to tell me what you want, Oliver, because I'm not as good at reading you as I pretend to be."

She is happy to see the corner of his mouth lift into that smirk that she likes so much. She really will have to remember not to take any sort of mood altering medication in his presence because she's having more word vomit than he doesn't seem to mind. At least he's amused now rather than brooding and angry. She likes this side of him, too.

"I'd have to agree with that," he says lightly, "Subtly definitely isn't your strong suit. And what I want… what I want is to take you to more than just more than the CEO and his executive assistant. I want to be able to interact with you without having to stop myself from touching you or saying things that I shouldn't say to you as just your friend. I want to be able to tell you how beautiful you are and run my fingers through your hair and kiss you because I want to without worrying about what it's going to do to you."

She feels her face heat at his words and as much as she wishes it wasn't happening, fresh tears are in her eyes. This is a side of him that she hasn't seen. She doesn't get to see the sweet Oliver. He reserves that part of himself for the women in his life who are not his tech specialist / executive assistant. For those words to be directed at her now, it does something weird to her insides.

"I want those things, too. I've wanted them for a long time," she says, her voice betraying her emotions, "But I – Can we do this? Can you and I actually be more than friends?"

He shrugs, "I don't see why not."

She worries her lip between her teeth. There is no way that she's going to turn him down, not for all of the tea in China, but she has her worries. Being his colleague has proved to be dangerous enough so she can only imagine what it'll be like as his girlfriend. And god, does she worry about him. She worries about him every time he dons the Arrow's garb so what's going to happen when she falls in love with him? She scoffs at herself. She's already in love with him, she didn't need to deny it.

"I'll be a target. More than I am now. They'll use me to get to you. Anyone who ever targets you, anyone who discovers your secret, if they know that I'm your … girlfriend then they'll target me, won't they?"

He closes the space between them again, sitting close enough now that their knees are touching, and takes both of her hands in his.

"Felicity, I won't let anyone hurt you," he promises again, "I will never let them touch you again. I'm sorry that I didn't realize that Slade would target you. He realized how important you are to me before I was able to admit it to myself. If I hadn't been trying so damn hard to avoid how I feel about you I could've predicted his movements. I would've kept you safe."

She leans into him, resting her head on his shoulder, turning her face into the side of his neck. He was worth the risk. There was no doubt in her mind. She wouldn't walk away from him. She couldn't. And she knew that he would keep his promise, that he would do everything in his power to keep her safe even if that meant endangering himself. That was Oliver.

"Thank you."

He stiffens at her whispered gratitude.

"For what?"

She shrugs, forgetting about her injuries only to be painfully reminded that they're there. He releases her hands, using his to gently explore her back and sides. She knows that he is cataloguing every laceration that he can feel and she is glad that he can't see the extent of the bruising that has formed around those lacerations.

"For coming for me. "

His hands settle on the sides of her neck and he lifts her head from where she's concealed herself in his shoulder. They are eye to eye now.

"There was no choice to make. He had you and he was going to hurt you."

He repeats his words from the day that The Count had taken her hostage at Queen Consolidated. The day that he'd killed to save her. The words I love you almost escape her lips but she keeps them contained. They are true. She does love him. But even after all that they'd been through in the course of the last year, she knew that it was too early to confess something so important. It wasn't the right time, not yet, but they would get there. They would get there together.

The End… or maybe it's just the beginning.