I was cruising down the street in my '64, when all of a sudden I saw her waving at me. She appeared like a slender man in the woods. It was Kate. I pulled up next to her and we began to catch up. "Hey." She said as she twirled a lock of her golden hair. "Hi, you look amazing (as always). I was on the way to Subway to get lunch, care t-." My phone rang. "Hello?" "Break yourself, fool." Some random gangster was mugging Kate when I bent over for my phone, and was now after my Chevy. "Please hold." "Hop out the whip, and I won't clap yo ass!" "I won't clap yo ass." I said mockingly."HEY!" he shouted as he cocked his little buretta, as he did so I drew my sawed-off shotgun and flipped over him. "Break yourself fool! Give Kate her wallet back or I'll blast your face onto the sidewalk. He did as such.

"Hey, sorry man, ain't no hard feelings? AIIHHAHAHAHBLER!" I tazed him. I reached for my phone again. "Sorry about that, how can I be of service?" "Dude, we need to talk about Colin…" "Why?" "He was coming on to me." "That's nice." "He stood nude in front of me…" I spat out my coffee. "He what..?" "Yep, forth base nude." "Did you enjoy the view?" I chuckled. "Not really." "I'll speak to him later." "Oh, and there's a new mission." "There always is."

I drove home and switch on my Mac to check my email. Marty sent me the de-brief.

Place of disturbance: SeaWorld, Orlando, Florida USA

Target: Roman Masterson

Reason: Has been seen giving orca whales, Tilikum especially, shots of bull shark testosterone. This makes the whales more aggressive, stronger and violent. He is also a well known advocate of the mafia.

Address: 21, Main Street.

Instructions: Detain, interrogate and incarcerate.

I went into the living room and examined my bust of Leonidas. I lifted his head and typed in my special code and scanned my fingerprint. Then the bookshelf twisted around and revealed my special underground transport to HQ (and the club I opened called The Dark Nightclub). I was listening to the MMLP2 on phone during the ride over. When I arrived I saw a asleep Colin clad in a blanket. He had a photo album of Alice on his lap, he was mumbling words of passion as he drooled on his chest. What a Creepy bastard. "DUDE, WTF?!" He hid the magazine behind the couch when he heard me. "Oh, hey. I wasn't doing anything." "Right… I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that. Anyway, did you get the message?" "Um, yeah I got it." He said with a slur. "Are you drunk?" "Yeah, but I ain't getting drunker." "I'm gonna make some coffee." "No, allow me." He lumbered into the kitchen passed out by the fridge and puked. "That's nasty." I walked to the intercom that summons the servant robots. "Clean up in sector three." Now wouldn't have been the best time to have a heart-to-heart with Colin (for obvious reasons), so I went to my room and geared up for the 'main event'.

Half an hour later I arrived at the airport to fly to Florida. I didn't go through customs (like all the losers inside), instead I went through the legit government section and was greeted by Marty. "Hello, little hobbit." I said as I rubbed his curly red hair. "Hi, Sargent. We've prepared a jet to take you down to Florida." He said as he pointed his tiny stubby fingers towards a silver G-6 jet. "Oh, sweet mama! IT'S BEAUTIFUL! I love my job." I boarded the plane only to see that the flight attendants were hot enough to be Victoria's secret models. And the Pilot was John Travolta (He is actually a qualified pilot). The radio was playing 'Tipsy (club mix)' By J-kwon.

We were partying all the way from Montreal to Florida. Popping bottles of crystal (basically partying Jay Z style). When the girls fell asleep, I gave Alice a call to tell her what's up with Colin. I told her that he had a crush on her, because she was the only girl he's spent longer than five minutes with and he's pathologically shy around girls. But he's also got a strange fetish for tom-boyish blondes. It's sad really. Shortly afterwards we arrived at a private airfield in Orlando.

When I left the plane there was a matte black Chevrolet waiting for me. I got in and drove to his home and went all recon to search for evidence. In his garage there were notes stating effects of the steroids on the whales and the events that followed such as the 'Dining with Shamu' incident in 2010 involving a 40 year old trainer and Tilly, which involved the trainer being brutally killed by the whale. I also discovered a big-ass cooling unit filled with large jars of steroids. I took photos of it on my phone and sent it to Marty. I started to search the house for Roman and I saw him watching This Is the End on his Sony flat screen while stuffing his trap with Mars bars and chips.(Fat ass.) He saw me walking through his sliding door in a reflection on the side of the TV. He rolled his chunky ass over the side of the couch and ran outside and ran down the road and I shot his ankle with my silenced Glock. I dragged him back into the garage, tied him to a chair and began interrogating him.

I smeared ice on his arm and asked him who he works for, but he was as quiet as a church mouse. I rubbed some salt on the iced arm, causing a searing chemical burn. He cried out in pain and sang like a canary. He said Tony Lopez hired him to make SeaWorld close down so he could build an apartment block to gain money and start a meth lab and a new cartel for his cousin Phil. He also said that Tony would be inspecting the property today.

I used my clearance card to gain access to the whale tanks, that's when I saw him. I ran up behind him and held my blade to his throat. "Hello, tony." "Not you again." "You're never gonna open up that lab." "You actually thought I was gonna open a meth lab? Silly boy. I have bigger plans than that." "What are you hiding?" "You'll never know." He said as he twisted my arm and dove into Tilikum's tank, where he was devoured by the whale.

"Oh my god, what happened?" Alice had arrived shortly after. "What happened to Lopez- oh…" "He dead, REALLY dead." We took a plane back to NY, and saw that Colin finally got a girlfriend. Her name was Celia. I realized that to find out what the Lopez's where planning we'd have to find Paul (or whatever his name is). Until then, we can relax.

Thanks 4 reading my new fanfic, hope you enjoyed it. Hey Alice, it's your turn…