Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, nor would I ever wish to, the little . . . ahem, where was I again? Oh yes, 3 cheers to JKR for her wonderful creativity!

Chapter 1

Mr Prince looked dully to the front of the auditorium and tried to stifle a yawn.

It was 4.30 p.m. on a Wednesday, and there was another hour and a half to go of the twilight CPD session. The lady leading the session, which was entitled 'Making your mark, tips and tricks mark smarter, not harder' was enthusiastically espousing the merits of bingo daubers. 'Just assign a certain target or message to each colour'. For instance 'Use pink to say 'Well Done!'

Severus tried to mentally picture himself at his desk, planting different coloured splotches on the student's work and instead wrinkled his nose. Continuing Professional Development. What a joke.

It had been ten years since he had joined the Science Faculty in this muggle school, three years after his supposed death. Sometimes he wondered whether it would have been preferable to die instead. At least then he wouldn't have to listen to insufferable 'experts' droning on and on about things they could never fully understand, not being actually on the teaching floor themselves. For Merlin's sake, the academic body could actually be marking right now and making progress this instant, rather than scrambling to find space next week because of the time taken up by this session.

The priestess of education droned on, bobbing her head of lustrous chestnut hair. Severus examined his nails, which were cleaner these days as he had practically given up potion making. He then rubbed his hand along his jaw, feeling the stubble that always started to appear at some time after 2.00 p.m. every day. He noted his skin felt rougher, that he was definitely getting jowlier. Well, age happened to everyone.

Oh no. A group exercise. The annoying expert was marshaling them out of their seats, organising them in rows, trying to get them to participate in a game of silly poses that would wake them up as staff and would supposedly do the same for the students within a lesson. Severus considered casting a disillusionment charm on himself, but knew the risk was too large to use unauthorised magic for something so trivial. Instead, he reluctantly joined his colleagues on the floor, making up the back row with several others who were also highly skeptical. They gave each other sympathetic looks and grunts. Out in the front row the SLT members were giggling and having a fine old time, lapping up this latest educational fad.

Severus knew they all didn't have a chance. He would have a set of bingo markers thrust in his arms and be ordered to make the class into a monkey-house before you could say 'insanity'.

His two happier thoughts were that a) most of the rest of the staff thought of the ideas in exactly the same way as him, and b) the students would, too.

They were all in the same boat, being made to jump through stupid, pointless hoops. He had never known it to be otherwise whilst being anywhere near an establishment controlled by a government.