This is dedicated to unicorn982001, who was generous enough to share such a wonderful story idea and give me the honor of writing, and the freedom to be as creative as my potentially less than sane mind pleased!

Chapter One

Percy threw own his quill in exasperation, "Darn it all… how the heck am I supposed to finish the report with all noise?" The former Head Boy's deeply ingrained values of rules and all things proper prevented him from cursing even within his own mind. Pale blue eyes lightening and flashing with anger at being interrupted yet again, he picked up his quill and placed it just so on his desk to await his return from telling the children downstairs to keep it down. Naturally, he paused long enough to fix his appearance, putting on a sweater of his plain white tee-shirt and combing his hair. He wore jeans, for the sake of comfort during the long hours at his desk, and slipped his house shoes onto his sock encased feet on his way to the door.

He galloped down the stairs two at a time, continuing the report in his mind so he'd know exactly what to write and minimize his time lost. Half a minute later, he was making his way down the second floor stair case, so enraptured in his report that he was silently dictating what he was going to write, complete with surprisingly animated facial expressions and hand gestures for someone writing about how long and point a quill's tip ought to be. Half a second later his foot hit a trick step set by the twins, which instantly rocketed him forward. Unbeknownst to him, in his brief moment of flight an additional part to the twins' little prank commenced, effectively transfiguring him into a rather feminine version of himself. Moments later he did a full body face-plant on the wall, somehow flipped upside-down, and slid down it until the top of his head tapped lightly on the floor. Then his entire body collapsed into a heap on the floor. Somewhere Jerry the mouse was giving a standing ovation.

Gritting his teeth, red with anger, he to the kitchen and entered the room with a deep breath, his finger pointing riotously and mouth agape, ready to let loose at the idiots he had the misfortune of calling brothers. All that flew out the window when the kitchen's lone, very female and very not ginger, occupant turned to him with a small but startled gasp and wide eyes. Much to his embarrassment the only thing he seemed to be able to force passed his own surprised lips was a weak squeak before he slowly shut his mouth and lowered the offending finger.

"Hello there," Hermione's tone was careful as she eyed him oddly.

"Good morning," he responded, still rooted to his place in the doorway, his mind shamefully idle as he scrambled to redirect from his planned tirade.

"Can… can I… help you?" her tone remained unchanged as she obviously struggled to figure out what to say. "Miss…?" She quickly tacked on, halting Percy from demanding to see Fred and George.

Suddenly filled with a growing sense of dread, Percy stared blankly at Hermione, who gave him an odd look back as she slowly craned her neck forward and parted her lips with a small nod or two as she silently prompted him for his name. slowly he looked down and saw two small feet dwarfed in his socks and shoes, a pair of legs slightly thinner than they ought to be hips only marginally wider and rounder than normal, a flat and what he assumed was softer stomach under his sweater, and two tiny bumps where there should be nothing. With a shaking hand, he reached up to feel his formally neat, respectable hair was a long and tangled mess. Without warning, he screamed, his new highly pitched voice serving to only further to further spook him. The sound of a second scream joining his own made him ump, causing Hermione to jump too. They continued like that for another few seconds, each scaring the other, which in turn only scared them even more.

"I'm going to kill them!" Percy finally articulated in nothing less than a shriek.

"Oh God please no!" Hermione crouched into a ball against the counter.

"Not you! Fred and George," he snapped back irritably.

"Oh please don't! I'm sure they didn't mean it. Can't we just talk about it Miss?" Hermione pleaded, still crouched nervously.

"Stop calling me that, I'm not a woman!"

Hermione opened her mouth and froze, not sure what to say. Homicidal maniacs she could deal with, she was used to them, they were normal. A woman that was obviously a woman, insisting she wasn't a woman was new, unusual ad out of her scope of abilities. She stared at the stranger, meeting her angry gaze. She crinkled her nose, just like she always did when deep in thought and concentrating hard. There was something familiar about her eyes…

"Percy?" Hermione whispered. Her eyes lit up as she finally put all the pieces together.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find the twin demons and demand they fix well…" he gestured up and down his body.

"Why give them the satisfaction?' Hermione asked, referring to Fred and George's hobby of pranking their brothers and then never letting them live it down. "Why not just let me do it for you? And if anyone says anything we'll just pretend to be none the wiser."

Percy visibly hesitated, wavering in the doorway. Hermione pulled out a chair from the table and lightly patted the back, shooting him her most beguiling smiling. Finally deciding that the private semi-friendship they'd developed entailed enough trust to allowed the talented witch help and keep this a secrete, he sat stiffly in the chair.

He closed him eyes and steeled himself against the discomfort as she began to transfigure him back to normal. In his mind, he could see her crinkle her nose as she waved her wand in complex patterns to fix his appearance bit-by-bit. His mind began to wonder as he thought to the strange mix of envy and respect his mind began to wonder as he thought to the strange mix of envy and respect he always seemed to feel toward her. They were undeniably similar people, and probably would have been more alike if not for her friends, so it seemed natural they'd get along. He couldn't help but envy how easy success, friendship, recognition, and respect all come to her. Picture perfect friends and family. It hardly seemed fair. But then he thought about how studious, kind, and generally good of a person she was. And it was impossible to not respect that. Much more than anyone realized… or he'd admit to.

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