The Defining Moments

What if things had happened differently the night Callie entered the Foster household? How will that change the events of the rest of the story?

Callie's POV

I stand staring out the lounge room window, my fingers curling tightly in the hem of the t-shirt that Stef had brought me down to wear to sleep in. I can feel myself shaking slightly, though whether from the cold or from the memories battering me I cannot tell.

I can't get the memory of the panic stricken look on Jude's face when I came rushing into the room after hearing the sound of flesh hitting flesh. The terrifying sound of my brother being beaten by our foster father. The thing that I promised I would never let happen to hum. But I couldn't get there in time to stop it. I couldn't do it. I couldn't save him from that one small thing that I had hoped he would never have to go through.

There are defining moments in a person's life, the moments where, by chance or by conscious decision, that person's life is irrevocably changed whether they want it to be or not. Things can spiral out of control and there isn't a thing that can be done to stop the descent.

What I did was one of those moments.

The instant I hit his car, and heard the sirens coming down the street I knew I had made a big mistake. He said I had gone crazy and he was only defending himself. I got taken away.

I left Jude alone in a house with a man that thinks it is ok to backhand a twelve year old boy without a second thought.

I made a horrible mistake.

I turn and walk through to the kitchen, to where I remembered seeing the phone sitting during dinner. I turn the corner with my hand already outstretched to clasp it in my fingers. I falter slightly when I realise it is no longer sitting there.

I can feel myself panicking, unsure of what I can do to get in contact with my brother. I know I need to contact him, I need to know he is ok.

My breath is coming in short, sharp gasps as I grasp the roots of my hair in my fists, trying to calm myself down. The pain of my grip slowly starts to make me focus a little, allowing me to think a little more clearly.

An idea strikes me as I realise that all the kids in this house must have a mobile phone, it just seems like that kind of house. I need to get a hold of one of those phones.

I creep up the stairs to where I know the bedrooms are. All doors except one are closed. I know that I can't open a door without waking the occupants or at least I know I would wake up and I can't take the risk that they might be as light sleepers as I am.

But the room with an open door also has a light on inside.

Things aren't going my way tonight.

I creep towards the open doorway, trying to keep myself in the shadows as much as I possibly can. A floor board squeaks slightly as I step over it and I freeze as I hear movement in the bedroom in response to the noise.

I hold my breath and wait a few moments, expecting at any moment to see an angry face standing in the doorway, annoyed at me for disturbing them.

When that doesn't happen, I take a few more steps until I am leaning against the door frame and suddenly I realize that I am standing in Brandon's room. He is laying on his stomach, facing the opposite direction from me, a book clasped in his hands, his lips moving slightly as he whispers the words to himself. I realise he has headphones on and I can faintly hear the sound of music coming from them. He hadn't moved in response to the floor board, thankfully, he had no idea I was here.

I can see a phone sitting on his bedside table connected to the charger just inside the room. Just as I go to reach for it, I hear a voice behind me.

"Callie?" Stef's voice asks, her voice rough with sleep.

I jolt back like an electric shock has gone through my body.

I freeze for a moment before slowly turning to face Stef. Her blond hair is pulled up into a messy bun and her warm yet calculating blue eyes are studying me intensely. I can see how she makes a good cop.

"What are you doing?" She moves closer to me, slowly as though not to spook me. I'm not sure what the look on my face is to make her feel like that is warranted, yet I am thankful that she hasn't moved too close. I am still unsure of the rules in this house and from my experience, the mothers can be just as bad as the fathers.

I realise that I haven't answered in a few moments as she moves closer and lifts a hand as if to place it on my arm.

I flinch back involuntarily.

Stef lets her hand drop, an almost pained expression flashing across her features before morphing into a clearly practiced calm expression.

"Callie?" She asks, her voice also carefully controlled. "What are you doing?"

"I… I think I was sleepwalking." I stutter slightly, hoping the shadows I am standing in hide the proof that I am lying from my face.

"Sleepwalking?" Stef repeats, her voice showing that she does not believe me.

"Yeah." I answer my voice steady, I can feel my face schooling into the calm look that I have also perfected after many beatings from my first foster father, needing to be calm made it easier, tears just gave him what he wanted.

"Ok well you need to get back down to bed, it's going to be a long day tomorrow. I'll follow you down, I need a drink of water any way." The tone of her voice left now room for arguing. I nod my head slightly before stepping away from Brandon's doorway. Stef waits for me to move in front of her before following a few feet behind down the stairs.

I stop and go to move into the lounge room where the couch has been set up with blankets and pillows for me to have a place to sleep.

"Come into the kitchen and have a drink as well." Stef says, and I know that it is not an option to say no.

I sigh slightly before following her into the kitchen. I stand awkwardly next to the island and watch as she moves around the kitchen grabbing glasses from the cupboards.

It's quiet for a few moments as Stef turns on the tap to pour two glasses of water. She places on the island in front of one of the stools and gestures for me to sit on it.

I gingerly sit, barely balancing on the very edge of the seat, braced to bolt if I need to. Though a fight with a foster parent has never started with them getting me a drink of water first, there is always a first for everything.

Stef eyes me as she calmly sits on the seat at the far end of the kitchen island, as far away from me as she can be without leaving the kitchen. Her pained eyes make me think that she knows exactly what is racing through my head right now.

The silence feels heavy and full of things that want to be said, but neither of us are voicing them for the moment. Her warm blue eyes meet my wide, brown eyes and I look away, my cheeks warming with what I know is a blush. She clears her throat, breaking the silence, her long fingers move to tighten the hair band that is wrapped around her messy blond hair.

"So," Stef starts, her voice gentle. "Want to tell me the real reason that I found you upstairs just now?"

I stare down at my lap, my fingers, with their chipped fingernails, are wringing together, squeezing then letting go just to start again.

"Callie," Stef murmurs, leaning her hands against the counter top. "I don't appreciate being lied to."

"How…" I start, my voice breaking before I can get any more out and fading into silence.

"How did I know you were lying?" She asks, a small smile gracing her pink lips. "I've raised three teenagers, and I spend all day every day at work around people who don't want to tell me the truth. There are tells that show when a person is lying. I know how to spot those."

I look at her before looking at my hands in my lap again, picking at the nails on my left hand. We sit in silence for another few moments before Stef sighs. She gets up and moves towards my end of the kitchen island. I can feel myself shaking more the closer she gets to me.

"Callie, I'm not going to hurt you. I have never once raised a hand to the children in this house, while you are here, you will never be hurt. I promise." She goes to rub my shoulder but I move away slowly and she drops it back to her side.

"I want to help you. I really do but I can't do anything if you don't open up to me." She murmurs, her voice sound like she is trying to calm a screaming child. I wonder if that is what she thinks I am.

"Do you know the reason I went to Juvie?" I whisper, my eyes till following the movements of my fingers.

"You attacked your fosters fathers car with a baseball bat?" Stef answers me with the given reason.

I nod. "Yeah I did that. I did. But do you know why?"

Stef shakes her head and leans her elbows against her bench, leaning towards me without actually coming closer.

"That's the reason my foster father gave to the police when they showed up. Nobody cared to ask me my side of his story. So I got thrown in Juvie." I say, my voice harsh.

"So what is your side?" her blue eyes are curious as they study me. She looks like the kind of person who I can spill everything to and she will just take care of it. The thought scares me because I have never relied on anyone to take care of anything for me for the last six years.

Six years is a long time to not be able to trust anyone.

"Callie?"

I realise I have been quiet for a long time. My voice stuck in my throat. Stef reaches across the counter top towards me, moving slowly as not to startle me. Her hands still my fidgeting fingers, her touch warm, soft and gentle and I resist the urge to pull away. For some reason I don't want to see the pained look that I know will pass through her eyes before she can mask it. The thought of hurting her makes me feel uncomfortable, despite the fact that I have only known her for a few hours and her reaction to me being her wasn't overly welcoming. But despite this, I have never had a foster parent who has tried to talk to me like this before nor has their touch been so comforting.

Just as I go to answer her, we are interrupted by Lena walking into the kitchen, her hand rubbing her eyes tiredly. In her left hand is the phone that I had been looking for earlier. She places it back into the cradle before looking up.

"Stef," She starts before stopping, realising pretty quickly that she walked into something heavy and an apologetic look crosses her features. "I'm sorry to interrupt, I just came down to hand up the phone, it was going flat and beeping. I'll just head back upstairs."

She backs out of the room but the damage has already been done. I pull my hands out of Stef's grasp and move away from the kitchen island.

"Callie," She starts but I shake my head.

"I'm really tired can I just go to bed please?" I hate the pleading tone that I can hear in my voice.

Stef studies me for a few moments, her eyes frustrated, before sighing and nodding her head.

"Go ahead," She murmurs. "I'll see you tomorrow."

She stands still next to the table, her arms crossed, until I move into the lounge room before heading to the stairs. I can feel her watching me as I lay on the couch and pull the blankets up to my neck and turn to face the back of the couch. Her gaze is heavy and there is a pull to turn around, to finish the conversation but I refuse to look at her.

I can't open up to her all the way. It's only a temporary placement. If I get attached to her, to the whole family, then I don't know how I will cope when we get sent away and it is just me and Jude against the world again. I can't let my guard down, I can't begin to trust people when I know that most people do not deserve to be trusted, that I need to stay vigilant so that I can protect my brother. I can't become soft now.

I wait about an hour before creeping into the kitchen, grabbing the phone that Lena had thankfully brought back down. I dial the number I know by heart and hold my breath as I hear it ring.

After six long rings I hear the sound of it being answered.

"Hello?" the tired voice I longed to hear murmurs into the phone.

"Baby! Baby it's me." I say into the phone.

"Callie?" Jude's excited gasp rings through the phone and makes me breathe a sigh of relief.

"Yeah baby, it's me." I whisper. "Are you ok? Please tell me you're ok?"

"I'm ok, I promise." He answers quickly, knowing that I need to be reassured. "He hasn't been too bad. I've been avoiding him."

"I'm going to come for you as soon as I can, alright?" I murmur into the phone.

"I know." Jude says, his surety in me has always astounded me, so secure in the fact that no matter what, I will do everything in my power to always protect him. Even despite my last mistake. He still sounds so certain. "I missed you."

"I know, I missed you too baby," I breathe into the phone, my voice tight with tears. "I'm so sorry, I promise I'll make up for it."

"How?" he asks.

"I'm not sure yet." I answer. "But I promise, when I get to you, I'll do something special for you. Now I've gotta go, so you be good alright, be careful. I'll see you as soon as I can. I promise. Goodnight baby."

"Goodnight Callie." He says. "See you soon."

I hear the dial tone ringing in my ears and it takes me a few moments to be able to hang up the phone and put it down. I slump back into the cushions of the couch, feeling lighter than I have in weeks since hearing his voice.

The weight doesn't take long to settle back over me as I realise that I somehow have to make it all the way to San Ysidro from Anchor Beach and I had no idea how I was going to do that. I feel the tears prickle in my eyes uncomfortably and I angrily swipe them away. I don't cry and I can't let myself start now.

I drift into an uneasy slumber, half-finished plans darting through my head.

A/N I hope you guys like my story so far, if you do please read and review, it only takes a few moments. If I get enough interest I will post the next chapter which is already finished and over 3500 words in Stef's POV.