AN: Here's another one shot or sorts, though it could be a double shot who knows, but just something that came to me. Thanks for reading.

"Do we really need to be here?" Klaus asked

"I have to check up on my brother" Stefan said putting the key in the lock

"Last time I was here I lost my phone and my hand almost"

"Don't be such a baby" Stefan said as he opened the door

Stefan walked into the apartment and was shocked at what he saw. Half the apartment looked like a tornado hit it, clothes, food, everything scattered about. But the other half was clean, organized, pristine.

"Does your brother have a split personality now?" Klaus asked looking in

Stefan looked around wondering what had happened. He looked into the kitchen and saw half the sink was filled with dirty dishes that hadn't been done in weeks, while the other half was empty and clean.

"Damon?" Stefan called out

A white duck and chicken walked out and towards the kitchen.

"You're brother turned into a duck?" Klaus asked

"I have no idea what's going on here" Stefan said

The duck and chicken walked into the kitchen, while Stefan and Klaus followed them in. They saw the two birds were eating and drinking water from their bowls. They also saw there was a wee wee pad in the corner where they went.

"Are you sure your brother lives here? That we haven't just broken into someone else's apartment?" Klaus asked

"They key still works" Stefan said

Damon walked out in his pajamas pants, his hand in a box of cereal. His hair was messed up with bits of cereal in it.

"Damon?" Stefan called out

"Hey baby bro, what are you doing here?" Damon said as he walked into the kitchen

"Why do you have a duck and chicken?"

"Oh, that, I found the little chick a few weeks ago, someone's science experiment or something." Damon said reaching into the cabinet with the letter D on it.

"And the duck?"

"The chick was lonely. So I got him a friend"

"Any other animals in here?" Stefan asked

"Just your friend Klaus here" Damon said

"He's alive, so let's go" Klaus said

"Yes go" Damon pulled his hand out of the cereal box and threw cereal at Klaus

"Hey! That better not be on my side of the kitchen!" a female voice yelled

Stefan and Klaus looked behind Damon to see Caroline standing there dressed for work. She slung her bag over her shoulder and glared at Damon.

"The duck will eat it" Damon said

"No it won't, you know they can't eat that, they'll sick, do you want them sick?!" Caroline scolded

"No," Damon pouted, "I'll clean it up"

Stefan and Klaus looked at each other and then back at Damon.

"Who are you and what have you done to my brother?" Stefan asked

"Ask Blondie here" Damon said picking up the cereal off the floor

"Since we're stuck living together, I divided up the apartment. He can be as messy as he wants on his half. He just can't get anything on my half" Caroline said

"And he agreed to this?" Klaus asked in disbelief

"She managed to train the duck and chicken to go on the wee wee pads and to eat only in the kitchen" Damon said

"You did?" Stefan asked

"yes, they're actually smart animals. I'm going to be late, so I'll see you later. Nice seeing you Stefan, and Stefan's friend who talks funny" Caroline headed towards the door

The duck and chicken made quacking and chirping noises as Caroline headed out.

"See you later Blondie!" Damon yelled

"Bite me!" Caroline said as she closed the door

"you'd like it too much!" Damon yelled

"You seem to be doing well" Stefan said

"As much as I can be considering what happened"

Klaus looked at Stefan wondering what happened. And then back at Damon.

"It's not the end of the world, so you got dumped" Stefan said

"No, I don't get dumped! She had the nerve to dump me! Who does she think she is?!"

"So you're living in this rubble because of a girl?" Klaus asked

"His girlfriend, ex girlfriend Elena, decided that she didn't want to be with him anymore. So she up and left him and went to her new boyfriend's place" Stefan explained

"Really? Someone couldn't stand you?" Klaus said

"But it turns out that Elena, went to Matt's place, which is where Caroline comes in" Stefan said

"Who's Caroline?" Klaus asked

"Blondie, she just tore through here after organizing all the toothpicks in size order" Damon said

"You see, Caroline was dating Matt for the past year, and it turns out he was still in love with Elena. So Elena moves in with Matt and Caroline had no place to go"

"The plot thickens" Klaus said

"So my brother here thought it would be a great idea to have Caroline live here with me" Damon said

"Well she did clean up her half of the place" Stefan said

"She did, and she got duck and chicken in order. But she always wants to clean and organize, it's like living with martha stewart on crack" Damon said

"At least she's clean" Klaus said

Caroline walked back into the apartment. After a long day of work she wanted to just shower and relax with a glass of wine. She closed the door and the smell of something delicious hit her. She turned around and wondered what it was. She saw chicken walking around but not duck. She looked up on the counter and saw a roast duck cut up and she screamed.

"What?! What's going on here?!" Damon came rushing out

"You cooked Duck?!" Caroline screamed

"What? NO! NO! Duck is in the bathtub!" Damon yelled

"What?" Caroline asked

"He's in the bathtub! He's a duck, he likes water remember?! Chicken got bored and left"

"Where did you get the roast duck from?!"

"Klaus, he likes to be an ass"

"Oh, he bought it"

"What you think I'd eat Duck?! You think I'd do that?"

"No, course not, I just, I saw a roast duck on the counter! What was I suppose to think!?"

"I love Duck and Chicken! I'd never do anything to hurt them!"

"No, course you wouldn't. I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions."

There was quacking from the bathroom.

"I'm coming!" Damon yelled, "You've upset him, now I have to make more bubbles for him to calm him down"

Damon went back to the bathroom, leaving Caroline confused. She had only lived with Damon for a month and in that month's time they managed to be at each other's throats before finally settling in with each other. When she first stepped foot inside she was horrified. She didn't know how a person could even live in such a mess. And then she saw the duck and chicken. She thought Damon kept them around to eat them, but she saw a different side of them. She saw that even in the mess and the fact that he just didn't care about himself, he did care about the duck and chicken. He always made sure they had food and water. He always filled the bathtub for the duck and left the windows open for chicken to feel the sun on its feathers. And even though they both were dumped and betrayed by their significant others they managed not to kill each other in the apartment. Or hook up. They were both not interested in each other. Caroline needed a place to stay and Damon just needed someone to be there to make sure he wasn't dead. Caroline wondered what Damon did exactly as he slept in all day and didn't seem to go to work. Yet rent was paid, the utilities were paid, they weren't evicted so Caroline never thought to question it.

Caroline was heading home after work again, and she walked towards her apartment. She saw Klaus standing at her door, holding something in his hands.

"Oh come on Damon, let me in" Klaus banged on the door

"If that's another roast duck then you can take it with you" Caroline said

"It's not a duck"

"Guess Damon's in the bathtub" Caroline said taking her keys out

Caroline opened the door and walked in, Klaus followed her in. She noticed duck and chicken were sitting on a small blanket on the floor.

"Damon?" Caroline called out

Klaus placed the large container on the counter and opened it. Caroline's head snapped around. She could smell the delicious aroma.

"Oh my god! Is that-" Caroline ran into the kitchen

"Chicken and waffles" Klaus said

"With biscuits!"

"And honey"

Caroline reached in and grabbed a chicken leg and started to eat it. She stopped when she saw chicken and duck sitting on the blanket.

"You bastard! How could you!" Caroline yelled as she pointed the chicken leg at him

"You're the one who reached into the box love! No one forced you to eat it!"

"You've been tormenting Damon all week like this!"

"Not exactly tormenting"

"Stop it!"

"I'm not doing anything sweetheart. You're the one waving that fried chicken around. Careful wouldn't want to get crumbs on the floor"

Caroline realized what she was doing and stopped. She was going to put the chicken back into the box but stopped.

"it's the best chicken in town. Made by a little old grannie from the south"

Caroline looked at the chicken in her hand and wanted to eat it.

"Did you eat the roast duck?" Klaus asked

"What? No!"

"Why not? It's quite tasty"

"Stop it!"

"What?"

"They're right there!"

"So? You're not eating them" Klaus said as he reached into the box and took out a chicken wing and started to eat it

Damon walked into the apartment holding a bottle of bubble bath.

"Oh chicken" Damon said walking over

"Damon!" Caroline yelled

"Says the girl holding the chicken leg. I don't think Chicken appreciates that" Damon said taking a piece of waffle out

"I'm not eating it" Caroline said

"I am" Klaus added

"Where were you?" Caroline asked

"We ran out of bubble bath. Duck likes bubbles remember?" Damon said

"But-" Caroline started

"It's natural, organic, gmo free, and not tested on animals. It shouldn't hurt his feathers" Damon said walking towards the bathroom

Duck got up and followed him and chicken got up and followed duck.

"That is still the strangest thing I've ever seen" Klaus said

"Duck and chicken give Damon something to care about. He was a total mess when I met him"

"You don't say"

"Then again so was I. We were both incredibly messed up at the time"

"And look at you now"

"Why do you enjoy tormenting Damon?"

"I don't torment Damon. We just never got along that's all"

"He has that effect on people. I'm surprised I haven't killed him yet"

"Same here"

"So what exactly did he do to you?"

"That's a rather long story"

"And?"

"One we should have over dinner"

Hope you were amused. Yes I got the idea of duck and chicken from elsewhere. I haven't given them any names yet. Though I wonder if they really need it.