Chapter 14- The Return

I know I don't update that much anymore, and I'm sorry but things are coming from all sides nowadays. I've had Colorguard practice all week and a competition this weekend. I hope to update more soon, but for now it's probably going to be a chapter per week. Hopefully updates will speed up soon.

Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Darkness suffocated her. The walls pressed in on all sides and no matter how much Lily tried, she couldn't push them apart. They forced against her, shattering her bones with fierce strength, but Lily just couldn't fall unconscious and make the pain stop. Then Avery's face appeared.

He tapped on his chin with one long pale finger thoughtfully as he watched her. The walls receded, and she was left mangled and broken on the floor.

"You aren't too terrible looking are you Mudblood…"

She discovered, to her horror, that she was naked. He approached her, that hunger rearing in his eyes.

She screamed, and couldn't stop or wouldn't. It was only after many days that she finally realized the pain wasn't so bad, and Avery's face flickered away. New voices echoed upon her, painfully loud.

"My arm hurts; I think it's broken…"

"That stuff looks disgusting, do I need to drink it?"

"Come on, just a few more bites, you have to eat…"

"When can he leave, we need him for the Quidditch game in two weeks…"

Lily's eyelids danced, until she used all her strength to get them open. The light flooding a bleached white room blinded her eyes, making her flinch unperceptively. Everything hurt. Her head, her chest, and especially her abdomen. The tears fogged her vision as she remembered what happened. Avery leering at her and he didn't even bother killing her properly. That's how useless she was to him, and the rest of the world. She supposed someone had found her dying body and brought her to hospital wing.

"Madame… Madame Po- cough- mfrey…" Lily rasped. Her throat was stiff and hard, like she'd tried to swallow a bottle of glue.

The nurse stuck her head out of her office, looking around and when she saw Lily awake, her eyes widened into galleons.

"Goodness!" She bustled over, casting a quick charm around her area that Lily wasn't entirely sure what did, "I didn't expect you to be awake for a few more days dear. You lost an amazing amount of blood and had enough spells cast on you that would kill any normal witch."

Lily coughed heavily. She felt the blood drip down from her lips.

"Merlin!" Madam Promfrey gasped, grabbing a potion from her tray, "Drink this right away. We can't afford to have you lose more blood. Some of your internal organs collapsed as well, so the coughing doesn't surprise me."

"Madame… Pomfrey," Lily gasped as her throat cleared from the sickly purple potion, "Have any of my friends been here…"

She smiled sadly, "I'm afraid we had to tell them you had been moved."

"W- cough- what?"

"I tried to treat you, but you couldn't stop screaming for so long. I'm afraid you've had a few nasty curses that addled your brain a bit. Human presence seemed to increase the screaming, and I ended up needing to cast a fair few concealment spells to keep other patients from coming over."

Lily stared at the roof, and thought of her nightmares. Yes, they were very scream worthy. But they were based on what really happened…

"What happened?" Lily tried to sit up, but the sensation of her chest burning caused her arms to release her and drop her onto the bed, "I remember… him. And that. But my head hit the ground and everything faded out."

Madam Pomfrey sighed, "I'm not sure what spells he used on you, but they caused your wounds to stay open and to bleed more consistently. In the morning Mr. Potter and his friends found you…"

"Potter!" Lily eyes flew open, "James Potter?"

"Yes," She frowned, "He and his friends found you and brought Professor McGonagall and I to the scene. You're very lucky. If it weren't for those boys you'd be dead."

"Lucky," Lily stared horrified at the wall. James Potter had seen her. Seen her in such a way. Naked and most likely lying in a pool of her own blood.

Oh Merlin stun me, She glanced at the ceiling, but Merlin wasn't very helpful today.

"I'll keep you here for a week or so, and then you can be released," Madam Pomfrey set down a few more potions, "Take these and tell me if you need anything."

"Is there any way I can get my assignments I missed?" Lily pleaded and Madam Pomfrey sighed.

"I'll contact one of your classmates," She sighed, "But they aren't allowed to vi-"

"Visit, I know," Lily nodded, "And I agree. I don't want to see anyone else."

Because it was true. Lily didn't want to see any of her friends, have them ask about what happened or crack jokes. She didn't want to talk to anyone, just think by herself.

"Okay dear," Madam Pomfrey didn't seem surprised, "I understand, with the side effects of what happened."

That was the last time either one of them spoke of what happened on the astronomy tower. Madam Pomfrey spoke to Lily about potions mostly, which one would be better to treat what, what kinds of ingredients were recommended. Lily was excellent at Potions, and rather enjoyed the subject. It was fine by her to help out, and it made her feel like she was doing something after all of her classwork was complete.

The day when Lily had to leave came all too soon and Lily nervously fidgeted at the doorway to the Hospital Wing.

"Don't worry dear," Madam Pomfrey's words echoed in her ears, "It'll be breakfast when you go to your dorm, and Professor McGonagall says you should stay out of class for the first day and just get comfortable with the school once more. But make sure not to wander off where teachers can't see you. You gave us all a fright dear."

Lily sucked in a breath and flitted away from where she'd lived for the past few weeks. She raced down the hallways like a tortured ghost; although maybe it was just because she'd passed the Bloody Baron that she thought that. When she reached the Fat Lady Lily's nerves were balancing on a high wire.

"Oh my dear!" The Fat Lady trilled, "How wonderful it is to see you again. There have been so many rumors about what happened to you…"

"Merpeople," Lily murmured dully over her gossiping. Madam Pomfrey had given her the new password.

The Fat Lady looked disapproving at the interruption, but opened up all the same. There were only a few stragglers left, and all of them watched Lily's every move as she bounded across the common room and up into her dorm. Thank Morgana it was empty… Lily grabbed her book bag and left immediately. She didn't look anywhere but straight forward as she raced out of the Fat Lady, and down to the grounds.

Lily was never the most social person. She had her friends, yes, but she wasn't one of those people who could just talk to strangers without any hesitation. She felt bonds tying around her mouth whenever she wasn't answering a question in class or yelling at James. It was how she was built to work. After Avery, Lily never wanted to see another person's face again. All those people staring at her… they knew exactly what happened. The rumors were strong and thick and Lily couldn't expect it to remain secret. Madam Pomfrey hadn't mentioned anything about Avery being caught… but after his speech Lily didn't expect that he'd stuck around to face the music.

I would leave a message from the Dark Lord to all Mudbloods by killing you, then leave the school and join the Dark Lord, having proved my loyalty.

He would not have been found, not if he'd joined Voldemort. Lily squashed that hope. With her attacker running free the message would be clear. Wanna be Death Eaters would see her as an easy target, a weakling. And Lily was afraid. Her Gryffindor courage had fled, leaving her chest open and exposed. But she'd have to go back to school, for better or worse. Lily needed to complete her education. It was always the most important thing and would remain so, attack or no attack.

Lily lay down on a large flat rock on the shore, doodling in her sketch pad images of the soft crested waves and fishes dancing off the water's surface. Merpeople swam up closer and closer, until Lily could see their body shapes swaying in the water to an invisible beat. Like an army, same as the rest of the world. Everyone gathered for battle, even those creatures that were out of harm's way. Lily knew that Americans and other Europeans also fretted about the war raging in Britain. If it got to out of hand here, they would spread anywhere, like a disease. We needed to quarantine the problem…

Lily snorted softly to herself. She sounded like such a muggle with those references. No wonder the Slytherins targeted her, she was so weak and muggleborn. The perfect victim. Not enough witch to be a Pureblood, but not enough muggle to be non-magical.

She shrank away into shadows whenever she heard students chattering, on their way back from Care of Magical Creatures. It was the last class period, and Lily had dinner starting soon. What she wouldn't give to be away from all those people… but that would only prove that she was weak. Lily was hurt, scarred and dead scared of human contact but she wasn't weak. Avery didn't have the satisfaction of utterly breaking her. Lily wouldn't give him that. And with that, the red head packed away her books and trudged up to the school.

There was already a buzz of sound coming from the hall. Lily would be making an entrance as one of the last people to come in. She would stick out even more. Lily jutted out her chin, her robes straight and her tie prim. There were a few grass stains, but Lily didn't pay any attention to her appearance as she pushed open the doors and walked in confidently.

Talking ceased almost instantly, and all heads swiveled to her direction. Lily didn't meet anyone's eyes. She just strutted forward and took a seat the empty section closest to the teachers. She didn't spare her friends a glance, keeping her eyes to her food. The muttering overlapped itself across the hall, the students slowly turning back to their food, occasionally flitting their glances to Lily. She was heaping salads and soups into her bowls and ate without a care in world. Lily groaned to herself. She'd missed out on so much while stuck in the Hospital Wing, one of them being the House elves excellent food.

The Marauders and Lily's girl friends watched hesitantly from their seats far down the table.

"Do we go over and talk to her?" Alice suggested.

Mary shook her head, "Bad idea. All of us, crowding her. That would be way too much for her to handle."

"Let's just send a few people," Remus offered.

Everyone looked at Marlene, who was fingering the friendship bracelet from Lily nervously. She glanced up, doing a double take when she noticed everyone's eyes on her.

"What?" She asked bitterly.

"Go talk to Lily," Sirius nudged her with his shoulder, "You two have always been the closest."

Marlene shrugged away from him, "She didn't sit over here Sirius. She doesn't want to see us."

"Come on Marls," Sirius whispered to her, "She's your best friend. You need each other."

Her gaze met his, black against brown. A resolve formed there, in both of them. Their friends muttered, elbowing each other to draw attention to the fact that Marlene and Sirius' mouths were only inches from each other. They leaned closer. And closer. And closer…

Peter sneezed violently and the two people broke eye contact distractedly. The others glared at the small boy accusingly. He shrugged.

"Right then," Marley coughed as she put distance between herself and Sirius, "I'll go talk to her. James, you come too."

"Me? Why me?" James didn't expect that, especially not from Marlene.

"I don't pretend to understand the friendship you two have formed, but I think you should come too," Marlene told him, "Besides, you were the one to find her anyways."

James wanted to point out how that would make it worse, but the words died in his throat as his desire to see Lily took control. To hear her laugh and watch that little sparkle in her eyes light up the rest of her face. James wanted to rid himself of the image where she laid there, more dead than alive, permanently. Seeing her again couldn't hurt.

"Okay," James sighed, and pushed away from the table, walking beside Marlene towards Lily.

James sped up the closer they got to her, but Marlene got slower and slower, and when they were right behind her she stopped.

"Can you do it?" Marley whimpered nervously.

James nodded and stepped forward.

"Lily?" His voice was soft and nervous.

She didn't respond, and hummed what sounded like a dirge under her breath.

"Lily?" James asked a little louder, but she still didn't respond.

He placed a hand on her shoulder in hopes of getting her attention.

Lily hadn't heard anything. She was concentrating on reading the newspaper. So much had happened during her time in the Hospital Wing. The attacks seemed to have increased, not in numbers but in brutality and Lily feared for the future of other muggleborns.

A warmth hit her shoulder and Lily swiveled her hand, seeing the hand against her skin. The body attached to the hand took Avery's gruesome shape, his sneer in place. His hand pressed against her skin brought back those memories. Lily opened her mouth and screamed. Her legs pushed away from the table and she moved away from Avery, tripping over the bench and averting her eyes temporarily.

When she returned to his gaze, it was no longer Avery. James and Marlene had stepped back way from her, expressions fearful and shocked. The hall had lost attention in their food and conversations once more, staring at Lily. She felt their eyes touching every part of her and did the only thing she could rationally think to do.

Lily ran to the Hospital Wing. Madam Pomfrey bustled out, shocked to see her back so soon. Lily spluttered a few words about hands and eyes, and the nurse's expression softened. She laid back down on her bed, and chucked the calming drought down her throat. Lily leaned against the hard pillow, an uncomfortable mattress beneath her, and let sleep take her into its clutches.

What did you think? Not my very best chapter, I realize. There is a lot of 'Lily does this' and 'Lily does that' but I needed to include her thoughts about what happened. I know she doesn't dwell on it very much, but the character of Lily here is a strong individual, and doesn't like to live in the past. She will let what happened hold her back from her friends, but she doesn't think about it that much in the next chapters.

Chapter 14 will be coming sometime next weekend, or maybe Monday next week. It will cover the rest of 6th year (yeah I know it's fast) and mentions James' birthday quickly. It will also begin summer break a tiny bit.

Please review!

SHOUT OUT TO MY SISTER LINA! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! FINALLY 18! ENJOY BEING AN ADULT!

-Trina