The entire purpose of this fic is to torture Sasuke.

Up in the heavens, a huge debate was going on in the middle of Kami's hall. Usually, most times, when an argument happened, only a few gods/goddesses would be even present, only because they have something to do with the issue at hand. But this time every gods/goddesses were present, most, if not all, were against a proposal of one little goddess.

The name of the said goddess was Naruko Uzumaki, the princess of the gods, the daughter of the queen of gods, Kami. She had blond hair that was tied into a bun and sky-blue eyes that could make anyone feel little. She had a formal black kimino on that costs God knows what. She was 4'9" tall, seeing as she was only twelve years old. She could be considered more beautiful than the rest of the women on Earth.

The little goddess was having a staring contest with her own mother in her court. The gods could feel a very heavy and deadly aura coming from the two. The goddesses beside Kami were just watching in silence, hoping that this would not become a huge issue, or another god vs. god fight, the last one left a huge crater in Jupiter. A lot of humans still wonder how that got there.

After a few more minutes, the silence was broken by Kami.

"Are you sure you want this mortal, my daughter?" She made a hologram of a young boy with raven hair on the palm of her right hand. "This boy…seems kind of…" She tried to look for the right word.

"Assholish and emo?" Yami finished for her. "There are more hotter guys in here don't you think?" She looked over to the other gods who were handsome enough to get whatever woman they wanted. Kami, Yami, and Tozi were very close to each other and did not mind it when the other interrupted them.

"Truthfully, he just seems like another 'Dark Avenger' type, we get those sometimes, nothing really new. So why do you want him so much?" Tozi was the one who asked this time.

"He saved her life once when she was on Earth and had no idea of her heritage…" Kami explained to Tozi. "…but are you sure?"

"Yes! I'm sure, I'm sure!" Naruko jumped up and down like a spoiled brat. There was no way she was giving up her teme to some other human bitch, even if she has to tear his arms and legs off to make him stay with her.

"But don't you care how he feels?" Kami was a bit worried about her daughter's obsession.

"It doesn't matter! He'll learn to love me soon enough!"

"Well, it is just one human…" Yami at least tried to support Naruko's request. "…what harm could it be?"

"But this is the first time a goddess has fallen in love with a human! It's not much harm when a god falls for a female human, but a goddess for a human male?! This is a first!" Kami's voice could be heard all over the room, but it wasn't considered to be angry, more of a cautious mother. "Let alone this is MY daughter we're talking about!"

"I agree with Kami," Tozi sided with Naruko's mother on the matter. "…Naruko is only twelve and is not old enough to go claiming a life's partner."

"I don't care! I don't care! I don't care! He's mine, and I'll go claim him anyway no matter what you say!"

"She certainly seems all fired up." Yami looked at the little blond. "You were like this with Minato, remember?" She remembered how Kami dealt with Minato back then.

"It was a one time fling!" Kami blushed. In the end she had let Minato go, she hoped that Naruko would do the same. "…I'm free to choose who I marry now!"

That sent all of the gods, except the gay ones, hopeful looks.

"Are you sure about this Naruko? You do know that if you choose him, he'll be bound to you for the rest of eternity." Kami made one final warning.

"I'm sure!" Naruko grinned. Teme was so going to be hers. She almost drooled at the thought of him being raped by her over and over again till the end of time. She was that obsessed.

"Fine…" Kami sighed, seeing no way out of this. "Sister," She looked at Yami. "…please bring over Uchiha Sasuke here."

Sasuke was having a good day. His fan girls seemed to be busy and he had a day off from school, so he could train. Nothing could make this day go wrong! He could finally focus on taking down Itachi.

"If I can't kill Itachi, then let lightning strike me right now!" He thought as he looked over at the clear sky.

Kazoom!

A lightning bolt came out of no where. All that was left of Sasuke was a burnt black corpse that smelled like barbeque.

It's a small chapter I know. But I really didn't have much time to write it tonight.

I know I'm going to get a lot of dislikes and flames for this fic, but at least it won't hurt to try.

This fic is a parody. It may seem serious at first, but it's not. The funny stuff come in the later chapters. This fic wa made for fun.

I have to thank a fanfiction user name "Tremor230" for giving me some ideas. I hope I get somewhere with this fic.

Preview of the next chapters:

Slender Naruko:

"All I have to do is find eight pages and she won't rape me for a week."