As Ward shut the door behind him, he turned around to see May seating herself at the hotel room table, holding two glasses that looked pretty appealing. He wondered where she'd gotten them.

He studied her face, trying to guess how old she was – but she had one of those faces, unwrinkled and unsmiling, and he couldn't tell. She had to be around Coulson's age, though, because of how well they knew each other. And because of her reputation.

He pointed to the glasses. "You aren't going to tell me I've drunk enough tonight?"

May shrugged. "There are nights," she said, "where it's appropriate."

He sat down, face set, and stared at her as she poured him a glass. Then he took a sip.

"Skye offered to talk to you."

His shoulders tensed. "She's very sweet," he said. "I shouldn't have yelled at her earlier. She would have listened…"

"But she's not who you wanted to talk to. There's no shame there. She doesn't share your memories. Or your rage."

Ward rubbed his face in his hands. "I don't want to scare her."

"It's okay to want to protect her as well as yourself," said May. "This isn't a mission. You aren't endangering anyone by dealing with this in your own way." She sipped her own wine, completely calm.

Ward felt some of the nervousness drain away, leaving him unexpectedly exhausted. How did she know that's what he needed to hear? That he wasn't wrong.

"I do want to protect her," Ward said uncomfortably. Not that it meant much. Ward wanted to protect everyone. Even Melinda May and Phil Coulson. People needed help, and it was his job to help them. But right now – this was about him. That wasn't a thought he had too often, but maybe, if he really believed that him helping himself wouldn't endanger everyone else… "I don't really want to tell her… about this, though… She'd feel like I was rejecting her offer."

"I understand."

"Coulson would think I was trying to impress her." Ward shifted uncomfortably. Damn Coulson and his smirks.

"Ah," said May, and took another sip. "If you ask me, I think you're trying to impress everyone."

Ward laughed. Laughter felt good. He should laugh at himself more often. "Is it that obvious? Does it work?"

May leaned back in her chair. She looked relaxed, but he knew that she wasn't, really. If he threw a punch, she'd have him pinned in nanoseconds. May was scarier than he could ever be, because…

"You can control it," Ward said. "When you're angry."

Melinda said, "Have you ever tried yoga? Meditation?"

"You said you see it every day."

May nodded.

"Like… making peace with it?"

May smirked. "In a way."

Ward shook his head. "I… I just never think about it. It's unpleasant. It makes me want to break things… people. Mostly people."

"It hurts," said May, nodding.

"I guess I'm hardly unique."

May shrugged. His face felt warm as he stared at the wall. "And Skye… she cries whenever people get too mean to each other. I can't tell her that I want to take people's heads and smash them into concrete, can I?" He shrugged. "You know, Fitz brought a sandwich along on our mission a while back? They're great people, really, but I just can't say…" He shook his head. "I don't want pity," he said.

May studied him. "Are you sure?"

"What?"

"Some people do just need a little pity. What is it you want?"

"I… just want it to go away."

"But it won't."

"Usually it does."

May finished her glass.

"Well, I thought it went away. Don't tell me you'd suggest making peace with the past?" Ward said with a smirk.

May shrugged.

Ward smiled. "A bit cliché."

May stared at him.

He sighed. "I know. Which of us is struggling not to Hulk out right now? The professor said it would take a few decades to get the anger back down. But… maybe that's less the staff and more me. Because I've been… what do people say? Repressing it? Yeah. You think I should talk about it."

May poured another glass of wine. She wasn't talking, because she wanted him to. "About the memory," he said. "You think I should tell you. I don't know."

She took a sip.

"I mean, better you than Skye… She'd probably cry all over me…"

Silence. Understanding but critical eyes. How did May do that?

"Will you tell me about yours, then?"

Another sip. "No."

Ward laughed. Then he sobered. "I had two brothers," he said, "And I don't talk about them very much." He took a giant gulp of wine to dull the pain.


A/n: What I imagined had happened in May's room. I know tumblr's freaking out, and I'm a bit confused, so I HOPE this is what happened. Plus, have I mentioned I love Ward?