Okay I am so very addicted to Pokémon X Y at the moment so I had to type this. Will include some spoilers. Oh and I don't own Pokémon just a copy of the game :D

My feelings
Part one
Admire me.

I looked at the beautiful girl as I laid her in her bed. She was sleeping soundly as I pushed her dark bangs from her eyes. Whilst I took her white cycling cap from her head and placed it on her bed side table, I contemplated taking her hair out of its long thick pigtails but if she was to wake up I wouldn't know what to do. Why am I so in awe of this girl? When did it all begin?

I remember when I first met her at her home. I was doing the neighbourly thing and welcoming her to the town. Shauna was with me to and we were greeted with a nervous dart of her blue eyes. She seemed quiet and shy and was surprised to find Shauna glomping onto her arm and dragging her to the next town, me close behind with my hands in my pockets.

I watched them from behind, her dark hair bounced as she giggled and occasionally her eyes glanced back at me to check if I was still there. I simply smiled at her reassuringly and soon we were at the usual café with our other friends Tierno and Trevor. I watched on as she slowly opened up, accepting the nick name lady S and slowly she seemed more confident. She began seeming like her real self and I just kept watching her.

When we got our first Pokémon her eyes lit up and her smile was from ear to ear as she held the little fennekin close to her chest. That image is ingrained in my mind, the girl with the captivating smile and the Pokémon that seemed to instantly bond with her.

But the awe began to grow when we battled for the mega ring. Who would have the right to use it and who would have to continue fighting in hopes to one day gain it. It wasn't even close. Her Pokémon were determined, strong and passionate just like her and I was left behind. I could not see my last Pokémon fall I simply watched her as realisation replaced the look of determination on her face, a mixture of utter joy and a hint of apology followed soon after. Her kind heart rebuked her for winning but that is how life is.

And I was jealous. I was jealous of her passion her determination and her strength. I was jealous of how easy it was for her to make friends with Pokémon. They followed her, she didn't even have to battle them to catch them if she didn't want to, and they would follow her like ducklings following their mother.

That was the moment I realised my need to become a better trainer. And so I left her side. I travelled solo in hopes to improve. I wanted to gain that power, that determination and that passion she had when she battled. Her elegant moves, the strength in her voice, the resolve in her eyes, I wanted to be like that to.

And then there was team flare. We made it to their hide out and for the first time we battled side by side. I felt like I was aided by an angel, her grace had become even more pronoun and her passion stronger then I could have known. I was in awe of her skills, of her beauty, of her. Her Pokémon were well trained and loyal. Never have I seen such Pokémon like hers. Her little fennekin had become a beautiful Delphox and walked by her side where ever she went, it did not even think of leaving its beloved place by her side. And again I was jealous. I was jealous of that spot it had taken although I do not know why.

We saved the Xerneas, the legendary Pokémon sealed in that device and again I watched it follow her. When the place began to cave in I grabbed her hand and pulled her down the hallways, Shauna close behind. Her hand was soft and warm, her foot steps behind me sounded soft and graceful.

I met her next at the caves leading to the battle grounds of the elite four. Again I battled her but as much as I improved she improved also and again I failed. But her voice was soft, her eyes kind as she took my hand and pleaded me to be by her side as she took on the elite four. I could not refuse, I could not take my hand away from hers and I could not tear my eyes from her face.

Again I watched her battle, she took down the elite four with ease, and she even defeated Diantha with barely a sweat. My awe had to be at its peak, it could not grow. I wanted so badly to be like her. But why was this need so great? Was this the need, the urge of the average rival?

The constant battles left her exhausted but Diantha took us both by the hand and lead us to a parade of heroes. One we were both part of. And then he appeared. The man was a giant, his hair long and scraggly like he had wondered the earth. He challenged her and despite her fatigue she accepted with a resolute nod. She passed me her bag and removed a single pokeball. I tried to dissuade her, he had more Pokémon! He had strong Pokémon but she answered me with a smile and the words "He wants to know what it's about. I want to show him the truth behind Pokémon battles and the only one that can really show him that is the one I have shared this journey with from the very start."
My heart pounded at those words. Her love her friendship her bond with her Pokémon was admirable and her in general was what made me admire her.

Again I thought this must be the peak of my admiration it was far greater than before.

She defeated him easier than anyone I had seen before; his Pokémon didn't even deliver a move to her Delphox. The crowd roared and even the beautiful sight of that man reunited with his Pokémon friend did not tear my gaze away from her.

The only thing that took my gaze from her was the violent shake to my arm by my friend Shauna. "Calem! The crowd is too much. She is tired and overwhelmed! What should we do?!" Her eyes were terrified and when I turned back to Serena I saw the panic behind her smile as the crowd pressed ever closer to her. I had to help her.

I dug into her bag and pulled out the master ball, releasing Xerneas and jumping on its back. It knew what I thought, it saw its beloved master in need of help and it dashed into the crowd. I called out her name and her eyes locked onto mine in surprise. That moment made my heart leap. For the first time our eyes were locked and I could not explain the feeling that overwhelmed me.

The man that she had just beaten lifted her high above the crowd and placed her in front of me on the back of her Pokémon. She recalled Delphox to her pokeball and Xerneas bounded through the crowd and out of the city.

"Calem." Her voice was soft and sweet. I loved her soft kind voice. "Thank you." And she leaned back into my chest as she whispered again "Thank you". I didn't move. I didn't speak. I could not make a move and my face felt like it was on fire. I prayed she could not hear or feel my pounding heart. And it was then I realised why I wanted to get stronger, why I wanted to grow more determined, why I wanted to show the passion she did.

I wanted her to admire me. I wanted her to watch me as I smiled. I wanted her to be in awe of me. I wanted her to love me like I loved her.

I loved her. It was the first time I had thought of it and the feeling inside of me grew stronger with the realisation it was true.

And now here I am. Sitting on the edge of her bed and watching her sleep. I will get stronger and then when she is there, watching me, admiring me … maybe I can then tell her how I feel. She may not accept it but I will have the confidence to tell her.

A light caught the corner of my eye and I jumped in shock as I found Delphox staring at me. "I was just bringing her home! Honestly I just put her down!" Delphox looked at the clock and back at me with a doubtful look.

I removed my hat and ruffled my hair in embarrassment that a Pokémon could see right through me. I sighed with a smile at the fox pokѐmon and patted it on the head.

"Look out for her okay." And I left her behind again. I had to become stronger so she could admire me.