Hi guys, how are you all?

I'll get back to the 'Twist of Liars' but this story came up randomly, and I liked writing about it.

Maybe a chapter two? Review, and let me know what you think.

-Megan

Alex's POV

I absolutely hated school, and the fact I had social anxiety didn't really help the case either.

It's hard having anxiety you know. You're silent all the time, and voices inside your head start to become louder as words just cannot come out from your own mouth. It just seems that the words run over each other, again and again. A teacher speaks to you requesting you answer a simple question on the board, or my worst nightmare, to read out my answer I had previously written for homework. Palms sweat, words crumble out of my mouth inaudibly and my cheeks turn bright red. But this is normal, right? I mean, everyone gets nervous once in a while or misses their stop on the subway because they didn't want to check the travel board in case others thought they were weird, right?

It got worse when I sat my first set of exams. I remember I ran out of pages for my History paper, and needed more. The box at the top of the hall seemed so far away from my front row desk, and I do believe it was taunting me to just come and pick a page, then mess up and trip, it was daring me. I put my shaky hand up, and they provided me with more paper. My friends started to get annoyed, and called me too concealed and shy. They were maturing and going out to nightclubs being stuck wall-to-wall with crowds of people, when I struggled on the subway.

They say it's a mental thing, but it's complex to explain to someone who hasn't experienced it or anything similar. I get jealous sometimes of people who are confident, but for all I know they could be suffering in silence.
After my History exam things got dramatically worse. I couldn't take it anymore. I hated not being able to go out normally and constantly worrying about my appearance, and it definitely started to take a toll on me. School was a place I didn't feel safe in, and avoided it at all costs. My mum tried to get me to go, but she seen that my phobia of society had got worse - so she tried to work around it.

I got course work sent home for a while, and done independent revision. I was bored most of the time, and began to explore different things. I listened to an entirely different genre at which I originally listened to, and ended up loving it. I talked to a small number of different people, but they were nevertheless interesting. I read a lot, and broadened my vocabulary.

Then the bombshell hit.

My mom came home from work and sat me down, before explaining that the school said I was missing far too much...but given the circumstances, they would provide every service possible to aid my external education. The words 'external education' sounded terrible, but the worst part? She put forward the idea of home schooling.

I've heard of it before, but never knew what it involved. She looked at me worriedly, talking softly like if she had of used her regular tone I would have shattered into tiny pieces, why would I when that's what was happening inside me?

I just nodded, I couldn't hear her anyway with the sound of my heart pounding out of my chest. I just relaxed myself by listening to music, something I found myself doing more often. Did you know there's celebrities who have anxiety? I bet you didn't. One I'm fully aware of is Alex Gaskarth, I read about it but don't know too much about it.

I thought about it a lot that night, but soon fell to sleep due to the soft lullaby of my favourite play list. When I woke up it was the same routine: get up, dressed, have time to have a spiritual session.

I was nervous to meet him/her, and wondered whether they would be very strict, or maybe a bit easier on me since I'm not the type to rebel. The clock seemed to holler the ticks, and I felt the familiar feeling erupting in my stomach. They would be here soon. My phone vibrated and the remainder for me to take my medication popped up, my mom must have set if before she left for work.

I could hear the door knock, and I momentarily stopped breathing. The door sound lingered through the house and into my ear. I got up, checked what I looked like and braced myself for opening the door. I found myself enchanted by the person at the other side.

She had blue hair, dark eye shadow which emphasised her yes, a dimple on her chin which made her look adorable. She wore a simple t-shirt with a combat jacket over it, one I had recognised from Top Shop, a loose hanging necklace, black skinny jeans and boots. Holy mother of lord.

I was completely stunned by her appearance, she looked absolutely beautiful. She smiled and reached her hand out, 'Hi I'm your home school teacher. I'm Demi, you don't have to refer to me as miss. It's nice meeting you!' I shook her hand before mindlessly standing to the side, allowing her entrance.

As I closed the door and led her into the house, I forgot about the nervousness and just began to blush instead. Which is probably worse. We sat down and she explained how she would be teaching, what she would be teaching, how she was laid back, and that she understood my situation as she was told before hand.

We started on Maths, a subject I found easy to get a grasp of. Half way through quadratic equations she closed the book, and done a recap of what I should have vaguely knew by now. She smiled and complimented me on how quick I picked the subject up, and I blushed...again.

After a couple more home school sessions with her, I started to enjoy her company. She was actually pretty cool. She liked similar music, she understood my anxiety as she had experienced it herself at university. We became friends, and my mom was bursting with joy at the fact I said more than two words to someone.
What I never said was why.
That her daughter, me, had a crush on their home school TEACHER, Demi.

It confused me a lot. I had never had feelings for a girl in anyway before, she was the first. I had dated boys before, and found myself to have fallen for them - but there's only so much communication I can handle so after a while the relationships ended. There was this one time where I met a girl, Mitchie. She was a lesbian but the same age as me. She was still in the closet, but was open to any questions I wanted to ask her. She was a really sweet girl, she had soft brown hair and beautiful brown eyes. She complimented me all the time, and it only took a while of us talking for me to fall hard, and fast.

I don't feel a need to label myself, so at the moment i don't really think about it. I felt like if I liked anyone, it was just for them, not their sex.

I began to like home schooling a lot more, and Demis compliments during sessions was something I relied on to get me through the day. Of course my grades went up, and my mom was really proud. I had built a solid friendship with Demi, and she trusted me with stuff. She told me she was gay, something that shocked me. She rambled on one day while I was doing a paper about how she liked this girl, but they couldn't be together for reasons and also because she was straight.

That was the first day she looked me in the eye and was sad, I wish this girl knew how lucky she was.