A/N: Here is part two of two. Enjoy!

Castiel was vaguely aware of someone to speaking to him but he didn't want to focus on understanding what was being said. Didn't want anymore of Dean's words cutting into him in a way no one else's words, angel or human, had ever managed to. The shadows were still crowding him, still pushing and clawing and taunting and Cas closed his eyes completely, hoping that if he closed them tight enough, it would all just go away.

As the beating of his heart slowed and the shallow gasps got further apart, they slid open just to reveal a glimpse of Dean still smirking down at him. "Good riddance," he muttered before Castiel's consciousness faded completely, his heart going still.

…...

"Cas!" Dean checked the pulse again. Nothing. Placing his hands under Cas' nose, he felt for a breath. No air hit his skin and he tried to remember if it was vital for angel's to breathe. He knew his mind's attempts at coming up with arguments that Cas wasn't dead were getting weak. The angel was dead still in Dean's arms, not breathing, his damn heart wasn't even beating.

He'd tried any form of CPR he could remember on the guy and his lips still felt wrong after the crappy attempt at mouth to mouth. Cas' lips had been so cold and unmoving and Dean had felt so stupid, not even sure if it was doing any good, so he hadn't spent too much time on it. Instead, he'd simply resulted to shaking the angel a few more times because he still couldn't believe it. Cas was the indestructible one. No matter what, he was there to help them out or heal them. He shouldn't have been able to die. He couldn't.

Dean hadn't even realized his hands were shaking until they were jittering against the dirty motel ground. He drew in a deep breath that didn't do shit, still trying to process the cold, literally, hard facts in his arms. Cas was gone. "You stupid bastard," Dean muttered under his breath, at a loss for anything else to say, jaw tensing. "We're gonna get our asses kicked into the ground without you. You know that, right?"

What even happened to Cas now? Where was his grace? When Sammy had been gone, Dean had been able to cling onto the hope of saving him with a deal. He was pretty sure demons didn't do angel-reviving. Dean didn't know of anything that did angel-reviving except God and he was pretty sure Cas had already used his 'get out of jail free' card after Lucifer had blown him into pieces. This was different than losing Sam. Because Dean didn't have any hope of Cas coming back. So he did what only Cas had gotten him to do. He prayed.

"Cas? I... I don't know if your angely mojo is still somewhere out there or if it's gone. I don't know if you can hear me. But if you can... Come back? You've saved mine and Sammy's ass more times than we can count. We can't afford to lose you. Me and Sam need you, man. I need you. And not just cause you help clean up when I screw up and shit hits the fan. You're my friend, Cas. And you can't be dead. You can't just leave me...

"Damn it, this is so stupid..." Dean grumbled under his breath because of course, nothing happened. He traced the seams of the ridiculous trench coat, watching Cas' -or Jimmy's- face. He didn't even look serene. Just blank.

His body was starting to ache from the time spent on the ground and with a heavy sigh, Dean started moving Cas to stand up. He needed to call Sam and tell him what had happened. The thoughts made his limbs feel heavy and his chest constricted. Just as he shifted, it happened. Cas' chest raised.

Dean froze completely, his breath catching in his throat and he only dared to breathe again when he was in suffer of asphyxiating himself. He stared and he stared, waiting, hoping, praying to see that movement again. To see anything. Nothing happened and Dean's hopes plummeted even further. He cursed himself and he cursed Cas and he cursed the goddamn ghost sickness and holy crap, his chest actually was moving!

It was a tiny movement; Dean almost missed it but then it happened again, the apparent breath larger this time.

Hope swelled up within Dean and he clutched at Castiel tighter, watching as his chest rose and fell and then finally, chapped lips parted and the angel gasped in a breath. Dean let out a laugh of pure relief and joy as Cas continued to draw in breaths, the scrapes and cuts on his throat shrinking and finally disappearing, not leaving a single trace.

"Cas?" Dean asked warily, not able to help a stupid grin from breaking out on his face when Cas' eyes finally fluttered open. He was practically hugging Cas right now, although it was a fairly awkward hug in their positions, but Dean didn't give two craps. Cas was alive and breathing and blinking and staring at him with that curious expression that always drove him crazy but was just making him laugh now.

"Dean," Cas replied but there was something off about the single syllable. It wasn't formal or even scolding like it sometimes tended to be. It was soft and Dean realized after way too long that he was still clutching onto Castiel for dear life. "That was unpleasant."

Dean let out an unattractive snort of a laugh he was sure Sam would have mocked him about into eternity but Cas, as per usual, didn't seem to find anything wrong with it. "I should probably let go of you," he said, loosening his grip on Cas. That was about as far as he got, Castiel pulling him back in and Dean didn't realize their mouths were on a collision course until the same lips he'd been trying to force life through earlier were now moving over his, very much alive and very much knowing what they were doing.

It took longer than Dean would ever, ever, be willing to admit, for him to actually form a thought more coherent than the string of curse words and it moved from that to 'he's actually good at this' to 'holy fuck, I'm kissing Cas' to 'holy fuck, I'm kissing Cas and I like it.'

That revelation was enough for Dean to pull away and he was met with eyes just as shocked as his own. "You didn't like that," Cas stated, like he was conversing about the weather. Of course, his statement was about as true as if he'd been talking about how sunny it was outside while a goddamn tornado was tossing cars left and right.

"First, you're going to tell me how the hell you're alive," Dean said, poking a finger into Cas' chest, not doing anything to move them from their positions with Dean practically holding the angel against his chest. Yes, his head was currently of whirlwind of thoughts along the lines of 'yes, you like dick, don't pretend you didn't know because you've been thinking about tapping that for the last few months.' Sometimes Dean really hated his inner monologue.

"Then, you're going to kiss me again and I'm going to show you how much I didn't not like that."

…...

"Finding and getting rid off the ghost turned out to be much easier once my vessel was no longer troubling me with a heart attack. I... abandoned ship, to phrase it like you would. I planned to return and heal Jimmy as soon as I'd disposed of him -a priest who had been hung for his crimes against the church despite being innocent. It explains the noose and the sudden appearance of the ghost sickness once I passed the church he was buried at.

"When I came back, I... I heard you praying. To me. That's why I kissed you." Cas became quiet after that, fiddling with the hands that are folded in his lap. They're sitting at the foot of the bed, Dean watching the side of Cas' face as he'd spoken.

It had been pretty damn hard to keep his focus on what Cas was saying instead of allowing his eyes to wander to the mouth moving around every syllable, wondering how he could make each and every kiss so drastically different from the brief one he'd shared with Castiel earlier. Finally, however, he'd actually started listening to what the angel was explaining and all thoughts of experimenting on this new found appreciating for kissing someone with even more stubble than himself was pushed to the side. For now. Well, up until Cas mentioned the kiss again and the reason behind it.

"You heard that," Dean repeated awkwardly, trying to remember what exactly he'd said in that prayer. He was pretty sure it went something along the lines of 'I need you, don't leave me' or something equally fitting for a chick-flick.

"I'm glad I did. Dean, the hallucinations I experienced before my vessel's heart gave out... They were of you." Cas was silent again and Dean moved just that bit closer, urging him to go on despite the fact that he knew whatever would come out of Cas' mouth would only be painful. "You -it said some things but none of them matter now, Dean. I heard your prayer and I could see your soul and how honest those words were." Castiel smiled and dammit if Dean's suddenly teenage girl heart didn't skip a freaking beat.

When Castiel seemed to have finished what he intended to say, Dean was pretty much at a loss on how to fill up the silence. So silence reigned until unexpectedly, Cas scooted closer, their thighs touching. "I've told you how I'm alive, even though I was technically never dead." He wasn't looking at Dean but there were faint signs of a blush creeping up the angel's cheeks.

"And now you want me to make good on my second statement," Dean said and it wasn't a question because he knew. And now he was grinning. He was grinning like an idiot but he didn't care because Cas also had a small smile on his face and the flush was spreading to his ears, only slightly hidden by the eternal head of bed hair that Dean just wanted to run his fingers through so he did. He ended up running his fingers through the dark locks as he pushed Cas down on the bed, pulling on them and using them to tilt Cas' head so he could lavish the angel's throat with kisses and bites that made him produce a whole symphony of needy sounds.

He wasn't giving himself time to think about just what he was doing and how absolutely terrifying the prospect of what this could mean was. Dean just did what he knew how to do and he knew he was good at and it just fit. The unusual scrape of rough skin against his cheek when his lips moved against Castiel's jaw; the firm chest pressing against his own that replaced the usual feeling of a nice rack; even the deep, throaty groans that were way too deep and should have made Dean uncomfortable in every way possible, didn't. None of these things felt weird. At least nowhere near as weird as how freaky he'd imagined them to be (yeah, his subconscious thoughts might have gotten away from him once, maybe twice after a few too many drinks.)

"Dean," Cas said suddenly and damn if it didn't feel nice to just allow himself to get turned on by the gravely voice, sounding even raspier after Dean had lavished Cas' throat and jaw with attention. "Dean, if you're going to keep doing that, you're going to have to excuse me."

Reluctantly, Dean stopped working on putting another mark on the angel's -his angel's- throat, silently grateful that he could get rid of them within seconds yet a small part of him hoping he wouldn't. Green eyes met blue with slight confusion and yeah, Dean hadn't been misled by the sounds Cas had been making; the blown pupils were clue enough. The small knot of worry that had started to settle when Castiel had interrupted dissipated as he realized just why Cas was wanting to excuse himself.

As Dean's eyes traveled down to the firm length pressing against his thigh, so did Cas' and a blush crawled up the angel's cheeks again. "I'm sorry, Dean, I will take my lea- oh. Oh, Dean," he practically whined and Dean grinned proudly, continuing to rub Cas through the material of his suit pants. Yeah, it was kinda weird rubbing off another guy but the sounds Cas was making... God, it was so worth it. The creases of doubt that had been present in Cas' face melted away, replaced by a look of pure ecstasy that had Dean's jeans getting even tighter.

So Dean kissed him again, because he could, and was surprised by the fervent way Cas retaliated. The first testing slip of tongue was allowed without hesitation and Dean took his sweet time exploring every dip and ridge of Castiel's mouth, finding and charting every difference between him and every girl he'd brought back to the motel. Each and every thing he could find, the way Cas tasted, the way he felt, the way he moaned into Dean's mouth and kissed him like he was a drowning man and Dean's breath was the only thing keeping him alive. All of those were just so, so much better.

"Dean, please," Cas suddenly panted and the desperation shining through the blue eyes was enough to make Dean want to get this moving along himself.

"Yeah, alright," Dean breathed back, placing one last chaste kiss on the gorgeous lips before suddenly shifting his weight and scooting down the bed. He was now straddling Cas' thighs and the clear outline of his straining hard on against the black material made Dean's mouth go dry. Hands moving towards the belt buckle, a sense of anxiety suddenly rushed over Dean but one look at Cas' face, the way he was watching him so intently, got rid of every last trace of doubt.

What was also gotten rid off were Castiel's pants, followed by the plain, white boxers that had initially made Dean laugh until Cas had glared at him in warning. He regained his composure, focusing all of his attention on the erection straining against Cas' stomach. Dean swallowed thickly, whether from the nervous anxiety curdling in the back of his mind or the sharp pang of lust that hit him low in his stomach, he wasn't sure.

Carefully, he leaned forward just so, wrapping his fingers around Castiel's shaft. The angel's head fell back against the mattress, mouth open in a silent gasp and Dean felt his dick throb at the sight. At the first stroke of his hand, Cas' hips bucked up and Dean chuckle, the sound throaty and raw from lust. "Easy there, cowboy," he instructed, using his free hand to push Cas' hips down and hold him still there. It earned him a halfhearted look of annoyance that quickly faded.

Dean started moving his hand over the sensitive flesh again, slowly at first, trying out what he knew he liked doing to himself and discovering things that made Cas groan and gasp and writhe under his touch. As he started picking up speed, hand moving over Castiel's length with more confidence now, Dean licked his lips subconsciously, taking in the sight. Cas was now clutching at the sheets, his fingers sometimes curling around the material before loosening, clenching whenever Dean turned his wrist in a particular way or added just that little bit of pressure that made Cas emit that whining noise again.

It didn't take long for Dean to make Cas a gasping, trembling mess, his hips jerking out of rhythm and all just from Dean's touch. It made the hunter feel such a strange sense of accomplishment and just knowing that he was the only one that had ever turned Cas to this- was the only one that had gotten to see the usually proper angel groaning every time Dean as much as dared to slow the pace- made it impossible for Dean not to surge forward suddenly and claim Cas' lips with his own.

The strangled moan he was rewarded with made Dean remember just how painfully hard he was but he'd suffer through it because he could see it in Cas' face, in the blissfully shut eyes and could hear it in the hitching of his breath that he was close. Dean started changing the pressure his fingers were applying to Cas' shaft, wanting to make him find his release just for Dean; just from the way Dean was touching him and taking care of him. Glancing back up at Cas' face, taking in the now screwed shut eyes and creased forehead, Dean realized Cas was holding back.

"Come on, Cas," Dean murmured into his ear, earning a broken gasp, "just let go." He squeezed Castiel's length purposefully and it made the angel's hips buck. Cas still refused to open his eyes. "Cas, look at me," Dean breathed against the shell of his ear, giving it a gentle nibble and blue eyes opened hesitantly.

"There we go," Dean said encouragingly, brushing his nose against Cas' jaw before he continued to murmur. "I've got you, Cas. Just let it go. I've got you." He scraped his teeth against the sensitive stretch of skin beneath his ear. "Come for me, Cas."

With a gentle brush of his thumb over the tip of Castiel's length, the angel's back arched up off the bed, his eyes wide as with a final plead of Dean's name, he spilled his release. Dean smirked triumphantly, unbuttoning Cas' shirt as he worked on slowing his breathing, still shaking slightly as his first ever feeling of post-coital bliss settled in.

Dean pulled off his now soiled shirt, tossing it off to the side. He ran his hands up the exposed strip of Castiel's chest, placing a few kisses underneath his sternum before suddenly, strong hands grabbed his shoulders and he found himself rolled onto his back.

Cas loomed over him, his forehead damp with sweat, a purposeful look in his eyes. "Now you," he rasped and even though Dean hadn't thought it was possible, more blood rushed down to his groin and he just prayed to whatever higher being that could hear him that he wouldn't freaking pass out because no way was he missing this.

"You don't have to do this, Cas," Dean gasped at Castiel's first, almost curious touch to the straining bulge in Dean's jeans. Cas gave him a stern look and nodded, applying more pressure as he started to rub him rhythmically and damn, Dean could have just come from the touch and that look alone.

"I want to," Cas growled back and yeah, Dean wasn't going to argue as the angel suddenly shoved his hand down Dean's pants, slim fingers wrapping around his length. Dean let out a drawn out sigh, head wanting to fall back against the pillows but he resisted, wanting to watch Cas -shirt open, pants gone and hair messier than usual- as he stared back curiously.

"Cas, you gotta get my pants off, dude," he breathed when it seemed the angel was just about content with holding Dean and not moving. An apologetic look flashed across the angel's face and Dean groaned at the loss of contact when Cas removed his hand. However, Cas wasted no time in practically shoving Dean's pants down, starting to touch Dean again with movements as tentative as the hunter's had been to begin with.

Just from watching Cas squirm earlier had been enough to get Dean going pretty far but he was holding back because the determined look in Cas' eyes was sexy as all hell and when Dean begged for more pressure, the angel complied. Finally, Dean gave in, head falling back against the mattress as he lost himself in Castiel's touch, the sound of his heavy breathing audible in between Dean's pleased hums and quiet moans of Cas' name. And then he felt it. The sudden wetness running up the length of his shaft before the warmth enveloped the tip and started traveling down.

Dean made no attempt to stifle his groan and he propped himself up on his elbows to see Castiel's head slowly bobbing up and down his length. "Cas, you really don't have to- oh, fuck, Cas." The sight was addicting and the feel even more and Dean raked his hand into the dark locks, rubbing Cas' scalp encouragingly. Dean had received many blow jobs in his lifetime and he could feel Castiel's inexperience but it did nothing to lessen the pleasure coursing through Dean's veins.

The first scrape of teeth, accidental or not, against the over-stimulated flesh was all it took and Dean's hips bucked hopelessly. "Cas, you gotta- shit, I'm gonna-"His words stuttered off and he groaned Cas name, along with some intricate swear words as the curled up ball of tension low in his stomach unfurled. His hand tightened in Castiel's hair as a response but Cas was making no attempt to move.

Dean's hazy mind registered the angel swallowing it all down and Dean swore it practically made him hard again. "I also learned that from the pizza man," he said, all gravely voice and eyes that are cutting through Dean in a way they never have before. Panting and staring up at Cas with a mix of lust, admiration and amusement, Dean suddenly moved forward to grab Castiel's shirt. He shoved the material off his shoulders before he tugged the angel down to lie next to him. He surged in to press his lips greedily against Cas' and still, the angel moaned into Dean's mouth and the sound had no less of an effect on Dean than it had before.

Once Dean finally came up for breath, Cas looked about as pleased as Dean had ever seen him. Lying back down, Dean did something he would to this day vehemently refuse was cuddling, but was basically him trying to get his arms (and legs) around as much of Castiel as he possibly could, spreading the covers over them. If he could have removed the molecules between their sweaty skin then he would have.

Moments passed in silence and Dean would have wondered if Cas was sleeping if he didn't have the knowledge that angel's didn't sleep. Well, on a regular basis that was. "What are we now, Dean?" Cas suddenly asked and Dean was too sleepy to let the question terrify him.

Instead, he shrugged, the movement jostling Cas with how close they were lying. "We're still just Dean and Cas," he said, holding him a little bit closer to his body and reveling in the way that Cas seemed to want to melt into him. "Except now I get to do this." Dean placed a kiss on Cas' shoulder, grinning. Cas turned around to face him, a small, almost shy smile on his lips and Dean couldn't stand it. He swooped in, kissing him lazily and the feeling of pure and utter happiness and content pulsing off Castiel and inside Dean's chest are almost palpable.

"And we get to do that again?" Cas asked when they finally pulled apart, raising his eyebrows hopefully. "I get to touch you like that again?"

Dean's groan was completely too pleased and he nodded, kissing Castiel once more because he could feel himself slowly getting addicted to the taste of his mouth, the feeling of it quirking up into a smile every time their lips met. Just getting addicted to Cas, now that he had finally just allowed himself to stop being so afraid, so in denial. It was a relief. The fact that he'd put all of this off for so long, when they could have been sharing heat and breath and everything else so much sooner should have pissed him off but he just couldn't find it in his heavy bones and tired body to give a damn. All that mattered was that he had Cas now. Fully, utterly and completely. The angel was truly his.

The door to the motel room suddenly unlocked. "Dean, I think I found the ghost that's responsible for Cas'..."

"Hiya, Sammy."

"Hello, Sam."

"...

"This isn't what I meant when I told you to keep him calm, Dean! I can't leave you alone for an hour and you're already- You know what, I'm getting a separate room, it smells disgusting in here."

"Love you too, Sam!" Dean shouted before the door slammed and he laughed, huddling back into the crook of Castiel's shoulder.

Soon after, the lights were turned off and it didn't take long for Dean to start dozing off. He was almost asleep when he heard it but he did. A whisper against the side of his face, almost inaudible. "Love you too, Dean," Cas had murmured and Dean didn't know whether or not the angel thought he was awake but he didn't care. His heart swelled and he simply help Cas tighter throughout the night, knowing that when the time came and Cas would hopefully utter these words again, Dean would be able to reply. He'd be able to keep his angel with him forever.

A/N: Ta-da? This is my first time posting anything M-rated so any feedback would be greatly appreciated! I hope you enjoyed!