A/N - So, this is kind of like my Hello Kitty rebound fic. I started working on it ages ago and then decided towards the end of HK I'd share this once it was over. I loved 8 Simple Rules when I was a teen, ah those were the days. Anyway, how this idea came about, I can't remember. But basically… I wrote down the rules and then applied them to a young Leonard & Penny. So we get Wyatt in here, and Meryl too (and later on, Penny's sister). So here is the result. A little piece for each rule. The pieces are not written consecutively so the events will go back and forth in time a little but you'll figure it out. Oh! I guess I should do a little disclaimer, the rules aren't mine, they're from the TV show. Just in case you haven't seen or heard of it. I'll update this every other day since it's all finished, and continue working on my other stuff. Hope you all enjoy, and let me know what you think! :)

Use your hands on my daughter and you'll lose them after.

"Mom, Dad..." Penny cleared her throat, standing in the doorway, fidgeting with the collar of her blouse.

"Sweetheart?" Meryl turned her head away from the television to look at her daughter.

"Is, uh... would it be okay if, umm... can... can Leonard stay the night?"

Leonard gave a small, awkward smile from where he was standing next to a positively terrified Penny.

"Rule one." Penny's father cleared his throat, standing from his armchair. "Leonard sleeps on the fold-out sofa in your room, and you sleep in your own bed. Rule two? If I hear anything other than talking, you will spend the rest of your life under my eye, young lady. Rule three: when you are in this house, under no circumstances do I want to see any of this ridiculous touching business. If I so much as see anything more than handholding, you will wish you were born without hands. Rule four: Penny, you will be in charge of washing Leonard's and your own dishes and clearing up after him, he is still a guest, and do not let him help you, it is your job to ensure your guest, even if it is your boyfriend, is happy here." Clapping his hands together once, he sat back down. "Got it?"

"Yes, Daddy." Penny bit back a grin as she breathed an instant sigh of relief. That had gone simpler than she had expected it to.

She wasn't going to remind him about the lock on her door, so he wouldn't know if Leonard had used the fold-out or not. She wasn't going to remind him that they lived at separate ends of the house, and that it was difficult to hear even talking unless you were pressing your ear up against the door. And she most certainly wasn't going to tell him about things that were more than handholding.

"Of course, sir." Leonard nodded at his girlfriend's father.

Meryl simply gave Penny a knowing smirk before turning back to the television. Blushing, Penny bit her lip and grabbed Leonard's hand, leading him back down the hall to her bedroom.

"Is your dad serious about that stuff?" Leonard asked nervously, as Penny closed the door behind them. "I don't want to get you into trouble."

Penny simply shrugged at him. "It's okay. He's not gonna know. Oh, except for the dishes thing. Don't even think of trying to clear up in this house, Hofstadter. I'm not allowed at yours, you're not allowed at mine."

"Alright. Guess I can't argue with that." Leonard chuckled. "You sure he's not gonna know?"

"Duh. There's a lock on my door." Penny pointed out. "They go to bed at eleven, we're safe after then. For now, I need your hands for something very important."

"Oh?"

Grabbing her book from her desk, Penny held it out to Leonard. "Show me how to do these freakin' circle theorems! And how the crap are you meant to hold the compass steady enough to draw a circle, I keep wobbling half-way round."