What had he done? The hand weight slipped from his numb fingers to hit the floor with a dull thud. Mondo stared transfixed at Chihiro's limp body on the floor, at the blood seeping its way into the rug. Slowly he was overcome with heavy tremors as the weight of his actions began to sink in.

And then a splitting pain in his skull had him dropping to a crouch, his hands springing up to clutch at his head. Images and sounds swamped his mind, over whelming him. They were eerily familiar and yet completely strange to him. But somewhere in his head he knew they weren't some bizarre delusion. They felt far too real to be anything other than his own memories:

oOoOo

The first day of school, he was assigned a seat but made a show of choosing the desk in the back corner, next to the window. The girl in the desk next to him turned away from her laptop to greet him cheerily. "Hi! My name's Chihiro Fujisaki! What's yours?" He immediately ruined his elaborately planned delinquent persona by flushing vividly and barely managing to splutter out his name. He hadn't paid any attention to who was sitting where and she'd had her face hidden behind the screen of her computer. He'd assumed she was a total nerd and probably completely plain. She didn't seem fazed in the least by his inarticulateness. "Let's have a great school year!" she said smiling. Mondo's flush deepened.

oOoOo

Midterms hit like a tornado. Everyone else was scrambling to study and memorize and prepare. He spent his time staring out the window and ignoring Ishimaru's lecturing. Chihiro's demeanor had taken a determined sort of look to it and she was studying just as hard as the rest of them. Every so often she'd voice some question or fact aloud in a quiet, puzzled tone. When it came time for the actual tests Mondo was completely prepared to fail them. What did he care about tests? He had a life waiting for him and it sure as hell wasn't going to be determined by some sheets of paper. But he was surprised to find he actually remembered quite a bit of what they'd learned, mostly due to Chihiro's little verbal notes. He spent the time in between watching her.

oOoOo

He took to wandering around the school in the evenings. The place was huge and he liked moving around far better than sitting in his room. It was on one of these strolls that he found Chihiro sitting in the garden on the top floor looking up at the sky. She'd jumped when he sat himself next to her but her surprised face quickly bloomed into a smile when she recognized him. Without him even prompting, she dove right into conversation, apparently unafraid of his rough looks or attitude. Weirder still was how easy he found it was to talk to her. They chatted for hours about nothing in particular before Chihiro couldn't stop herself from yawning. They departed for bed but the long talks in the garden very quickly became a habit for them.

oOoOo

He finally, with repeated pep talks from Ishimaru, worked up the nerve to ask Chihiro out. He stood there after the words were out failing not to panic and trying to figure out if the blush spreading across her cheeks was a good sign or a bad one. The relief he felt when she enthusiastically answered yes almost had him passing out it was so strong. They made their first date a picnic in the garden they both loved spending so much time in.

oOoOo

Chihiro had been acting odd lately and had been blowing him off repeatedly. At first he thought it was finals but it became apparent to Mondo that the strange treatment was only being extended to him. He finally confronted her about it and Chihiro reluctantly caved. They agreed to meet that night in her room to hash everything out. He was terrified she no longer wanted to be with him. It turned out to be a completely different problem. "I'm not...I'm not what I'm supposed to be. Not biologically anyway," Chihiro explained, head bowed and shaking. "I didn't want to tell you because I was sure you wouldn't want to be with me anymore if you knew. I am a girl, on the inside." Mondo sat quietly down on the bed next to his girlfriend, gaze fixated on the wall opposite. Then he slowly gathered Chihiro into a hug, squeezing her tightly as she sobbed with relief into his chest. He stayed in her room that night.

oOoOo

It took him a few more months to divulge his own dark secret because he was sure sharing it would ruin whatever good opinion she had of him. He should have known better. This time she held him as he trembled and sobbed. "He wouldn't want you to blame yourself like this," she soothed. He'd heard that same sentiment hundreds of times. For once he actually believed it.

oOoOo

The news reports were getting worse and worse as things outside the school devolved into chaos. There was talk of the school shutting down and of sending everyone home. There were also rumors floating around that the principle had an emergency plan in the works. Mondo was not overly concerned, he could take care of himself, but he knew it was eating at Chihiro. He found her sitting alone in the garden one night. She jumped when he approached her and smiled just like all those nights ago, but her smile was strained. "What's got you so spooked?" he asked. She attempted to laugh it off but he pressed further. Silently she reached out and snatched up one of his hands. He was startled to find hers was cold and shaking.

"Mondo, I'm scared," was all she managed to get out. He pulled her into his arms.

"Don't worry," he sighed into her hair, "I'll protect you no matter what. I promise."

oOoOo

As the last of his memories filtered in Mondo slowly sank down to his knees. He'd killed Chihiro. He'd killed the person he'd most wanted to protect. Tears streamed down his face as he lifted Chihiro's lifeless body into his arms. Self preservation warred with despair as he embraced the corpse.

It took almost an hour but eventually self preservation won out. He numbly switched out the furniture of the changing rooms and laid out the body. His hands shaking he pulled Chihiro's ID pad out of the gym bag it had been left in. It would be several more hours before he could bring himself to destroy the device and with it any semblance of the person he had been when he was with her.