Inevitable

He should have thought to ask. That was all Killua could think while pacing around his room. Why the hell didn't he ask when they were going to meet? Or when? Or how? Now he was just walking around his room probably a hundred hours to early all cleaned and dressed up waiting for Gon. Waiting and not even knowing for sure if he was going to show up. As far as he could tell Gon was pissed at him and maybe just got his revenge by letting him think he was coming to get him but then not even bothering to call and say he wasn't. No, Gon couldn't be that spiteful. He was going to show up or call. Killua let his eyes flicker to the watch at the other end of the room once again and sighed. It's not even five and I'm freaking out, he thought to himself.

And go out for a drink? With Gon? When did Gon even start getting drinks in the first place? Killua had started practically a day after he had left Gon and hadn't really stopped since; maybe out of respect for training once or twice. But Gon? He really couldn't picture Gon going out for a drink. And what was with that weird shirt fiddling when they talked about Kurapica? He wasn't entirely sure why but that bit of the conversation had been uncomfortable for both of them. He looked back up at the watch; five o' five. He sighed and let himself fall on the bed.

He can't still be affecting me this way. It's not possible that after five years I am still an idiot for him. Killua ran his fingers through his hair and pulled at it lightly. He looks so good. His appearance made him think of that day; which was the only good thing about that day besides Pitou's death. He probably looks really good under all those clothes. Killua let go of his hair and ran a hand lazily over his chest; by the way his arms look the rest of him must be amazing. He let his thoughts drift to each body part tracing the path on his own slowly until he reached his cock. His eyes opened and he sat up on the bed.

"What the fuck am I doing?" he let out. He was half hard already and apparently well on his way to wank to the thought of touching Gon. He couldn't let his mind tread through this dangerous path; getting him out of his mind after he'd kissed him had been almost impossible. Kissing Gon was the best thing he'd felt in his life; better than sex with any other person. He ran his tongue over his lip. Gon wouldn't be interested, right? That night had been just too many emotions and it had happened so long ago that it was impossible he even remembered it correctly. Well, maybe Gon didn't remember it. He, on the other hand, remembered quite well. What would he do if I tried to kiss him again? Because it had definitively been him the last time. Gon was just clinging on to him begging him not to leave and all Killua could think was if not now when? And yeah, maybe it hadn't been the right choice considering the path his life had taken since then but god was it worth it.

A sharp knock on the door woke him up from his stupor and he looked sideways at the watch to find it was almost six. He let go of his lower lip, which he had been pulling on softly as he let himself remember that last night. He's here; I cannot be thinking about this right now. He pushed himself off the bed and slapped himself a couple of times for good measure as he walked to the door. He should have known that was little to no use before he opened the door; Killua had never seen Gon like this.

"Hey!" Gon said and opened his jacket slightly and looked down at himself with a slight nervous look on his face, "I got this today; I'm not even sure I got it right. The lady on the store kept bugging me to get it" he said and looked up at Killua. Killua forced his jaw to stay shut rather than hang like an idiot for the second time today. Having all these thought about Gon and now having him standing there looking completely amazing all in black; it was literally taking all his strength not grab him and kiss the living daylights out of him.

"You got it right" was all he managed to say and it came out sounding way huskier than he had intended. Gon's eyes shot up to meet his and Killua could see a feint blush tinting his cheeks. He cleared his throat.

"Come in for a second; I'll get my coat" Killua turned around and walked in to the apartment with Gon. Just breath; you can do this.

Half an hour later they managed to move from the apartment to Killua's regular bar a couple of blocks away. Gon talked most of the way completely unaware of how incredibly uncomfortable Killua felt. He tried to keep looking in front of him rather than to his side. Relief was not a big enough word to what Killua felt when he had that first drink in hand.

"You might have a drinking problem" Gon said and Killua looked at him. "You didn't see the look on your face when you swallowed that" Gon said pointing at the empty glass in his hand. Killua looked down at it and then at Gon.

"I was thirsty; from the walk" he said raising his hand to get another.

"Sure" Gon said with a smile and took a sip of his drink. He saw Gon look up and the smile vanish from his face. Killua followed his gaze and felt the sneer growing on his face.

"Hi Killua! Fancy meeting you here!" said the man from last night. Was this morning send of not enough for this guy? Killua looked back at Gon and couldn't help the smile forming in his lips. Gon was fuming mad. Why was he so mad? He couldn't possibly be jealous right? He shook his head and looked back at the man.

"You are?" Killua drawled. Gon couldn't possibly be jealous of this pathetic excuse of a person. The man's smile wavered slightly.

"Last night" he started and Killua held up his hand.

"I know, my memory isn't that bad. Your name, what's your name?" Killua shot back impatiently he thought he heard Gon chuckle behind him.

"Hato" the man all but mumbled.

"Right, Hato. I'm sure I made myself clear this morning but I'm really not interested" Killua said and looked back at Gon he looked back and rolled his eyes at him and took a big gulp of his drink.

"But you said" he started again.

"I don't care what I said. Whatever I said was probably due to the many drinks I have before I met you. So really, just let it go." Killua said looking back at him irritated. Killua saw the man look from him to Gon.

"He's horrible you know. He'll just use you and do this after he done with you" he said directed towards Gon. Both Killua and Gon's eyes shot open wide at the suggestion.

"For the love of" Killua looked back at the bar and gestured to the laughing security guard; which happened to be his only friend in the city. He walked over to them and put a commanding hand on the man's shoulder.

"Out we go" he said to the man who only looked back at him baffled.

"You can't possibly" he started and the big man pulled him out.

"But I can" the man smiled at pulled him out. He laughed and looked back at Killua. "Does it have to be every night?" he smiled and walked out of the bar with a very undignified Hato on his arm. Killua shook his head and narrowed his eyes and Dai; the security guy.

"Every night?" he heard from his side and looked back at Gon. He thought he might find him smiling but he was just looking down at his empty glass.

"That doesn't happen every night" Killua said pointing at the door.

"Sure feels like it" Daisuke said as he passed the table. Killua felt the blush creep all over his face. Gon just kept looking down at his glass.

"Do you want another one?" Killua asked and Gon looked up at him.

"I'll get it" he said and before Killua could stop him he got up from the stool and walked over to the bar. Fuck.

"I'm sorry did I put a damp on your score tonight?" Daisuke said slipping next to Killua.

"You idiot! That's Gon" Killua said looking back at him. The shock on his face was all Killua needed to feel better right now.

"Killua I'm so sorry. He just looked like…your type" Daisuke said looking back at the bar at Gon.

"Of course he's my type; he's the type. Now get out of my face" he said grinding his teeth and trying to whisper. Could this guy probably screw things up even more? Daisuke looked at him apologetically and left. Killua looked back at Gon; his back was still towards him probably waiting for his drink. Fuck. Killua pushed of from the table and walked over to him. He sat by his side and saw Gon with his drink in his hand and a frown on his face.

"Hey" Killua said feeling even more uncomfortable than he had all night. Hell, much more than he had ever in his life. What was he supposed to say? He wasn't going to deny it was uplifting to see Gon react badly to him finding out about Killua's apparent whore status, but how was he supposed to make this better. "Do you want to leave?" Killua asked softly and Gon looked up at him and shook his head. He lifted his drink and raised his hand to the barman.

"No, I want another drink. Two more please" he said and looked at Killua and smiled.

About eight drinks later they sat on the bar laughing. At first they had tried to talk without treading through the dangerous topic; but now somehow Gon was now making fun of him and the whole situation.

"I still can't believe he was putting himself through that" Killua said coolly looking around. The bar was almost empty now.

"You're so horrible. That poor, poor guy" Gon said slightly slurring his words.

"Oh poor guy my ass; he was just plain dumb" Killua said and couldn't help smiling at Gon. Gon smiled back and looked down at his glass. That eighth drink had definitively been a mistake; there was a definite reason for his whore status and it was linked with alcohol and this damn bar. He let his eyes wander over Gon's face and stopped on his lips; they looked even more perfect than he remembered. He knew it was probably just a second but when his eyes looked back Gon's were looking right at him. Shit. He cleared his throat and looked back at his drink, drowning it in one gulp. Killua's heart almost stopped when he felt Gon's knee bump against his. That had been happing all night, what made this different was that Gon wasn't moving away. Killua looked sideways at him. Gon was looking at the bar ahead a slight smile on his lips.

"Maybe he couldn't help himself" Gon said softly; it was so soft Killua almost missed it. But here it was; a soft touch and even softer words, coming from none other than Gon.

"We should go" Killua said and Gon smiled at him and nodded downing his drink. As soon as they were out on the chilly street the nerves hit him again. Killua knew what he would do if it were any other guy. He would push him up against a wall and whisper in his ear all he wanted to do it if they would only let him. This was Gon; what was he supposed to do now?

"Want to walk for a while?" Gon asked. Killua looked back him and nodded. This was ridiculous; he could barely form words now. His heart felt like it was going to jump out of his chest. They walked in silence for a while not really going anywhere. Every time their shoulders brushed each other Killua felt his face turn red and cursed himself for having the emotional maturity of an eight year old.

"Do you really think he's stupid?" Gon asked breaking the silence. Killua looked at him puzzled; the drinking and the annoying feeling in his stomach apparently made him incompetent for conversation. Gon smiled at him, "Hato, they guy at the bar?" Gon clarified. Oh.

"Of course I do. I made it perfectly clear I wasn't interested and he still kept on coming back for more. I mean, have some dignity" Killua said and huffed for good measure. He wanted Gon to know he really didn't have anything to worry about if he was getting jealous over this excuse of a person. He looked sideways and saw Gon frowning instead of smiling like he thought he would. Maybe he was wrong; maybe Gon felt uncomfortable with him after what happened. But then why would he say that at the bar?

"You still slept with him last night; you can't blame him for being confused" Gon said and Killua stopped walking. Why was he bringing that up?

"Yeah well it was one night Gon. One night stands happen; they're not meaningful and they don't need a follow up" Killua said and looked expectantly at Gon. Gon let out a laugh.

"You know, it's funny because I thought I was the one person who knew you better than anyone but he was right about you" Gon said and Killua's eyebrows threaded together.

"Who's right about me?" Killua asked.

"Kurapica" Gon said and Killua's anger flared.

"Why the hell would Kurapica know me better than you do? Why would he think that? Why would you think that?" Killua asked but Gon just stood silent. "I don't get why you're mad at me" Killua said and Gon looked back at him.

"Kurapica told me that you only look after yourself; that you don't really care about other people. I told him he was wrong, that I knew you weren't like that; at least not with me" Gon said and Killua waited for him to go on. "That's why I tried to look for you the last time, before he stopped me. But you were busy" he stopped and looked up at Killua, "With someone" he finished and Killua felt his heart drop to his feet.

"Gon" Killua started but Gon held up his hand.

"I made a choice that night to believe Kurapica over you and I regretted it because I felt like I betrayed you but now" Gon said and Killua moved closer to him.

"What choice did you make that made you think you betrayed me?" he asked Gon, his anger and fear mixing together so that he could no longer tell them apart.

"I told you already, to believe him" Gon said averting his eyes. Killua took his chin and made Gon look at him.

"No, you think I don't know the way you work? You did something that proved that you believed him. What did you do?" Killua asked and Gon looked back at him.

"What do you think?" Gon said simply and Killua let go of his face and moved away from him. Gon and Kurapica? He'd kill him; he'd kill him for ever thinking he could touch Gon in the first place. Gon let him; Gon let him think he could touch him.

"Why?" Killua said and turned to look at him.

"Because I came to prove him wrong and you were chatting someone up and leaving with them. What was I supposed to do?" Gon asked him.

"Not fuck Kurapica that's for sure!" Killua said and Gon turned scarlet.

"I didn't!" Gon said still red. Killua looked at him feeling a feint spark of hope in his chest.

"You didn't? But you just said" Killua said and Gon shook his head.

"We didn't do that, we just kissed and" Gon said and his heart really fell out of his body.

"You kissed him?" Killua asked; his voice was so soft Gon turned to look at him. Kurapica kissed him. Kurapica kissed Gon. He dropped on a bench that was luckly behind him. "How could you?" he let out weakly.

"How could I? You left me! You never looked for me! Then I come back and you're with somebody else! And today! Today one left your apartment as I was walking in!" Gon said looking at him fuming.

"I didn't kiss him" Killua let out softly.

"Yeah right! You have love bite on your neck! What where you doing in there then? Training?" Gon asked him with a bitter laugh. Killua stood up and walked towards him.

"I fucked him; I didn't kiss him. I don't kiss anybody" Killua said and Gon's face changed from angry to confused in a second. "I haven't kissed anybody before or after you. I didn't want to kiss anybody else" Killua said and moved a little closer to him, "I still don't; even if it has been five years" Killua said and moved away from him. He thought about staying for a second before the urge to run away sank in. clearly Gon didn't feel the same way and now he had just told him everything. He'd told him everything after Gon had implanted the wonderful image of Kurapica all over him. He sighed and started to walk away.

"Killua" he heard Gon call out behind him. No. This needed to stop; it needed to stop so long ago. Killua kept walking and almost bumped into Gon as he appeared in a second before him.

"Don't fucking do that or I swear I'll go godspeed on your ass" Killua warned and a small smile formed on the corner of Gon's mouth.

"Don't leave" Gon said to him and Killua clenched his jaw. "I didn't think you cared. At least not that way; I thought I was just another one to you. You kissed me, alright? And you turned my world upside down when I thought it couldn't get worse. And then you left me, even though you said you wouldn't, when I woke up you were gone. I tried looking for you for weeks before I gave up. I believed you when you said you'd never leave me but you did" Gon said and Killua couldn't help it when his hand shot at its own accord to the side of Gon's neck.

"I had to leave I couldn't go with you; you knew that" Killua said to him and Gon paused looking away.

"I knew that before the kissing. I didn't think you would after" Gon said to him, one of his unnaturally warm hands grabbing Killua's wrist to pull him away but Killua just held on tight and moved his other hand to keep him in place.

"That didn't change anything Gon; you still had to leave and I wasn't going to keep you from that" Killua said to him.

"It changed everything! I didn't know I was in love you!" Gon said and Killua felt the world go quite for a second; the sound of his heart beating fiercely in his chest. Oh. "I didn't know that was the reason why I felt different towards you until you" Gon was saying but all he could hear was his words before that in his head over and over again. Gon's in love with me? Before he could process what he was doing he crashed his lips to Gon's. There it was again; that perfect feeling he thought he would never feel again. His heart slowed down followed by his breathing. He was home. He moved way and leaned his forehead on Gon's. "Did that" Gon let out breathily.

"Sorry, what?" Killua said still looking at Gon's lips moving.

"I didn't know until you did that" Gon said again and Killua let himself smile.

"I'm sorry I left" Killua said.

"I'm sorry I kissed him" Gon said quietly and Killua closed his eyes, "I didn't know I didn't until I did" Gon kept on going. Killua started to shake his head, but Gon put his hands on either side of his face; he opened his eyes to look closely at those eyes. "I'm being honest here. I don't want to kiss anybody else, I really don't want you to either. So just keep kissing me" Gon said and Killua felt the smile on his face; Gon smiled back to him.

"Okay" Killua said and Gon closed his eyes and sighed, rubbing his nose to Killua's.

"I meant right now, you know" Gon said and Killua felt Gon's hot breath on his lips sending shivers down his spine. He inched closer to close his lips over Gon's and moved his hands to grab on to his waist and pull him in closer. Their lips brushed softly together; barely even a touch, but it was enough to melt Killua completely. He moved his lips slowly, feeling Gon responding to him. He moved to press his body against that warmth and Gon wrapped his arms around his neck. A wolf whistle broke the silence and they pulled apart; they looked around and saw a group of people pass by laughing good naturedly. Killua let out a laugh and looked back at Gon. A blush had found its way to his face and Killua ran his thumb over his cheek.

"We should get off the street" Killua said. He didn't think it was possible but Gon's blush turned fiercer. "I didn't mean back to my place or anything I meant just not here" he said quickly but Gon shook his head.

"No, I want to go back to your place" Gon said quietly looking down at his shoes. He lifted his eyes to meet with Killua's.

"Oh" Killua managed to say. He grabbed Gon's hand and started to walk towards the tower. He heard Gon laugh behind him and smiled. Finally mine, was all he could think as the rushed back to his place.

Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter

Author's Note: Hi guys! If you've been reading this and liking it I'm happy (or maybe sorry) to say that I will be adding one more chapter to this and as you might have guessed it will be on the racy side. I'll probably post it sometime next week (100% honest) and for all of you out there that might have read Pandora's, I'll be posting around the next couple of weeks too. I'm sorry for the delay on both parts busy schedule and writer's block are not good friends but I need to finish this, not only for me, but for anybody that felt cheated out of a story. Again I really hope you like it and stay tuned for more!