Inu Yasha Unleased: Twisted Short Stories
Story 2: Puppies!
Warning: This entire series features very out of character behavior by all characters. Nobody is safe from the craziness!
New note for this one. another fanfic I'd written solicited a comment that I 'need to learn proper dialogue punctuation'. Now far be it from me to down the importance of punctuation. I however cannot promise that this, or any, fanfic I write has perfect punctuation. I try to offer correct spelling and a nice flow. but for some reason I've never had luck with punctuation. So if minor punctuation errors really annoy you, I truly wouldn't recommend reading this series. Slowly but surely I'm learning to correct such mistakes, but chances are there probably still are some within this text. Do forgive me for this most horrid of literary crimes.
Any notes of interest will be marked at the bottom.
[Opening Song. Scene fades in to Inu Yasha and Kagome in chibi form. Today they stand by the shore of a spring. Kagome is dipping her toes in the cool water, while Inu Yasha sits on a tree branch looking grumpy. So what else is new? Suddenly Inu Yasha hops down from his tree branch and stands behind Kagome. He says nothing.]
Kagome at first tried to ignore the half demon, deciding he was just being annoying and angsty as usual. However when several moments have passed and he still stands there, she growls and turns around.
"What is it?! Why are you just standing there? Say something!"
"Hmmph." Inu Yasha raises his nose into the air and snarls "It just so happens I was trying to think of the right way to say what I want to say. It's very important!"
Her curiosity now piqued, the dark haired girl gazes up at her traveling companion "Yeah? What is it?"
In one swift movement the dog boy extends his arm and points his index finger squarely in Kagome's face "Make me puppies!"
Kagome nearly falls into the water, sputtering and trying as best she can to make sense of what Inu Yasha just said "W-what?"
"You heard me girl." Inu Yasha crosses his arms "I demand you make me puppies, right now."
"What in the hell are you talking about?" the girl shakes her head "Puppies aren't like no-bake cheesecake you know. I can't just *make* you puppies."
"I didn't say they had to be born today. I just want you to start today. So go to it!"
"Are you insane? For one, I'm a human. I can't make puppies. Humans have babies." Kagome counts each reason on her fingers "For two, it takes two people, a boy and a girl. uh. doing certain things. to make babies."
"Excuse me, I happen to be a boy, idiot." Inu Yasha rolls his golden eyes "So why can't you and I do these 'certain things?'"
Inu Yasha has no time to dodge the humorously over-sized mallet that Kagome whacks him with after this statement.
"What'd ya do that for?" whimpers the half breed as he rubs the equally over-sized red bump now on his head.
Kagome stares at Inu Yasha in disbelief "You really don't *know* how babies are made?"
"No." Inu Yasha grumbles impatiently "So tell me!"
The school girl starts to blush furiously and wave her hands in the air "If you don't know I'm not telling you! This is insane. I'm. I'm going back to my time to do. something!"
With that Kagome speeds off in the direction of the well and Inu Yasha is left alone.
"That's the second time in this fanfic series she's done that to me." simmers the dog boy "What's so bad about making pup-erm, babies?"
[Scene changes to a rather spooky looking forest. Sesshomaru reclines on an out-of-place fancy chair in a clearing. He thumbs through an issue of 'Anime Villains Weekly' with Schuldich from Weiss Kreuz on the cover winking.]
"Hmm. Xellos is gay, who would've thought?" Sesshomaru says to himself.
As the femme demon lowers his magazine, there standing before him is his younger half brother.
"Oh great. It's the twerp." he rolls his eyes. "What do you want?"
"Listen Fluffy."
"Don't call me that!" sputters Sesshomaru, voice becoming a few notches less aloof than it normally is "That's the kind of name that might stick!"
"Sorry to burst your bubble, but it already has. You should have given yourself a less complicated name." Inu Yasha informs his older brother "Anyway, I need to ask you a question."
"This ought to be good." Fluff-erm, Sesshomaru says as he reclines languidly in his chair.
"You have to promise you won't laugh!" Inu Yasha narrows his eyes.
"Fine. I promise."
Lowering his head and taking a deep breath, the half breed quickly asks "Where do puppies come from?"
Sesshomaru's former cold exterior melts away as he falls from his chair due to the force of his laughter. He pounds the ground with a clawed fist as tears roll down his striped cheeks. This goes on for several minutes before his laughter becomes screaming as he is yanked up by his silvery tresses by Inu Yasha.
"Ow! Not the hair!" sneers Sesshomaru, swiping angrily at his sibling.
"You promised not to la-aaaagghh!" Inu Yasha is halted in his sentence when Sesshomaru grabs a few strands of *his* hair and tugs with all his might.
The two brothers are locked in a furious round of hair pulling for quite sometime. Staring each other dead in the eyes and giving their best glares and growls, they continue to struggle.
"You stupid. I just wanted to ask you one dumb question!"
"How dare you pull my hair! Do you have any idea how long it took to get it perfectly straight? Do you?"
Eventually the two tire out, panting heavily from their brawl, both with mass amounts of hair missing.
"So. are you gonna tell me?" Inu Yasha asks when he finally catches his breath.
"You mean you honestly don't know?" Sesshomaru blinks in doubt.
"No! Why does everyone make such a big deal about it? I raised myself for the most part! There wasn't anyone else to tell me!" the exhausted dog boy exclaims "Is that so wrong?"
"If you want to learn about it, why don't you do it the same way everyone else has to?"
"Oh, and how is that smart ass?"
[Scene changes, Inu Yasha and Kagome are at a modern times zoo.]
"Remind me again why you're so eager to come here?" the skeptical Kagome queries.
"Fluffy said that everyone learns about how babies are made at the---WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE MONKEYS DOING?!"
The End.
*My apologies to 'The Simpsons for stealing one of their bits.* ^_~
Story 2: Puppies!
Warning: This entire series features very out of character behavior by all characters. Nobody is safe from the craziness!
New note for this one. another fanfic I'd written solicited a comment that I 'need to learn proper dialogue punctuation'. Now far be it from me to down the importance of punctuation. I however cannot promise that this, or any, fanfic I write has perfect punctuation. I try to offer correct spelling and a nice flow. but for some reason I've never had luck with punctuation. So if minor punctuation errors really annoy you, I truly wouldn't recommend reading this series. Slowly but surely I'm learning to correct such mistakes, but chances are there probably still are some within this text. Do forgive me for this most horrid of literary crimes.
Any notes of interest will be marked at the bottom.
[Opening Song. Scene fades in to Inu Yasha and Kagome in chibi form. Today they stand by the shore of a spring. Kagome is dipping her toes in the cool water, while Inu Yasha sits on a tree branch looking grumpy. So what else is new? Suddenly Inu Yasha hops down from his tree branch and stands behind Kagome. He says nothing.]
Kagome at first tried to ignore the half demon, deciding he was just being annoying and angsty as usual. However when several moments have passed and he still stands there, she growls and turns around.
"What is it?! Why are you just standing there? Say something!"
"Hmmph." Inu Yasha raises his nose into the air and snarls "It just so happens I was trying to think of the right way to say what I want to say. It's very important!"
Her curiosity now piqued, the dark haired girl gazes up at her traveling companion "Yeah? What is it?"
In one swift movement the dog boy extends his arm and points his index finger squarely in Kagome's face "Make me puppies!"
Kagome nearly falls into the water, sputtering and trying as best she can to make sense of what Inu Yasha just said "W-what?"
"You heard me girl." Inu Yasha crosses his arms "I demand you make me puppies, right now."
"What in the hell are you talking about?" the girl shakes her head "Puppies aren't like no-bake cheesecake you know. I can't just *make* you puppies."
"I didn't say they had to be born today. I just want you to start today. So go to it!"
"Are you insane? For one, I'm a human. I can't make puppies. Humans have babies." Kagome counts each reason on her fingers "For two, it takes two people, a boy and a girl. uh. doing certain things. to make babies."
"Excuse me, I happen to be a boy, idiot." Inu Yasha rolls his golden eyes "So why can't you and I do these 'certain things?'"
Inu Yasha has no time to dodge the humorously over-sized mallet that Kagome whacks him with after this statement.
"What'd ya do that for?" whimpers the half breed as he rubs the equally over-sized red bump now on his head.
Kagome stares at Inu Yasha in disbelief "You really don't *know* how babies are made?"
"No." Inu Yasha grumbles impatiently "So tell me!"
The school girl starts to blush furiously and wave her hands in the air "If you don't know I'm not telling you! This is insane. I'm. I'm going back to my time to do. something!"
With that Kagome speeds off in the direction of the well and Inu Yasha is left alone.
"That's the second time in this fanfic series she's done that to me." simmers the dog boy "What's so bad about making pup-erm, babies?"
[Scene changes to a rather spooky looking forest. Sesshomaru reclines on an out-of-place fancy chair in a clearing. He thumbs through an issue of 'Anime Villains Weekly' with Schuldich from Weiss Kreuz on the cover winking.]
"Hmm. Xellos is gay, who would've thought?" Sesshomaru says to himself.
As the femme demon lowers his magazine, there standing before him is his younger half brother.
"Oh great. It's the twerp." he rolls his eyes. "What do you want?"
"Listen Fluffy."
"Don't call me that!" sputters Sesshomaru, voice becoming a few notches less aloof than it normally is "That's the kind of name that might stick!"
"Sorry to burst your bubble, but it already has. You should have given yourself a less complicated name." Inu Yasha informs his older brother "Anyway, I need to ask you a question."
"This ought to be good." Fluff-erm, Sesshomaru says as he reclines languidly in his chair.
"You have to promise you won't laugh!" Inu Yasha narrows his eyes.
"Fine. I promise."
Lowering his head and taking a deep breath, the half breed quickly asks "Where do puppies come from?"
Sesshomaru's former cold exterior melts away as he falls from his chair due to the force of his laughter. He pounds the ground with a clawed fist as tears roll down his striped cheeks. This goes on for several minutes before his laughter becomes screaming as he is yanked up by his silvery tresses by Inu Yasha.
"Ow! Not the hair!" sneers Sesshomaru, swiping angrily at his sibling.
"You promised not to la-aaaagghh!" Inu Yasha is halted in his sentence when Sesshomaru grabs a few strands of *his* hair and tugs with all his might.
The two brothers are locked in a furious round of hair pulling for quite sometime. Staring each other dead in the eyes and giving their best glares and growls, they continue to struggle.
"You stupid. I just wanted to ask you one dumb question!"
"How dare you pull my hair! Do you have any idea how long it took to get it perfectly straight? Do you?"
Eventually the two tire out, panting heavily from their brawl, both with mass amounts of hair missing.
"So. are you gonna tell me?" Inu Yasha asks when he finally catches his breath.
"You mean you honestly don't know?" Sesshomaru blinks in doubt.
"No! Why does everyone make such a big deal about it? I raised myself for the most part! There wasn't anyone else to tell me!" the exhausted dog boy exclaims "Is that so wrong?"
"If you want to learn about it, why don't you do it the same way everyone else has to?"
"Oh, and how is that smart ass?"
[Scene changes, Inu Yasha and Kagome are at a modern times zoo.]
"Remind me again why you're so eager to come here?" the skeptical Kagome queries.
"Fluffy said that everyone learns about how babies are made at the---WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE MONKEYS DOING?!"
The End.
*My apologies to 'The Simpsons for stealing one of their bits.* ^_~