A/N: I have to include this. I just can't resist.

James Kirk of the ISS Enterprise surveyed the town. Beside him was Mr. Spock, who coldly viewed the citizens. They were certainly interesting. The children enjoyed playing in cemeteries and lighting things on fire, crime was legal, and they had enjoyed a torture show from a lovely lady's store. Body parts littered the streets and a psychotic maniac named Harris was ravaging someone with a knife. They had dropped Bones off at the hospital, where he had seemed practically giddy over their methods.

"Well, Mr. Spock?" Kirk asked. He was done waiting for his first officer's opinion.

"I agree," Spock said.

Kirk grinned his shark-tooth smile. "I knew you would." He looked back across the town. "Occlutan," he murmured. "Welcome to the Empire."