As much as he tried to deny it, there was a very specific reason why he'd ended up spending winter in Illinois; Chicago was Lisbon's hometown, and he just couldn't stop thinking of her, no matter how much distance he put between the two of them.

Shivering he pulled his coat more tightly around him, in a vain attempt to seek some warmth. Back in California people were probably enjoying a warm and sunny weather, maybe they would even get to celebrate Christmas on the beach; while he was all alone in an unfamiliar city, the chill of the grey afternoon was nothing if compared to how cold and empty he felt inside.

Still it was the better option, both for Lisbon and for himself. He couldn't afford any more heartbreak than he'd already been through, while his friend surely deserved a better chance at happiness than he could ever offer her.

That was why he'd run away on her, just like she'd been expecting all along; his only reason for staying was null and void now that Red John was no more.

He frowned as he found himself standing right before the entrance of a church. It wasn't like he was a believer, but he knew Lisbon was; perhaps she'd visited this place time and time again in her youth, and that was what finally prompted him to get inside.

Slowly he took a few tentative steps down the aisle, then perched on the nearest bench. A wistful smile tugged at his lips as he remembered how he'd sprung upon Lisbon on a previous occasion; it had happened in a church, exactly like this one.

With a sigh he took a good look around; then he got down on his knees, as he supposed people would do when praying. He'd never prayed in his entire life, and he wasn't going to start now; however, he hoped that the quiet of the place could help his trouble mind settle if only for a little while.

His gaze rested on the statue that was standing a few feet away from him, surrounded by candles that flickered in the half-light. The woman seemed to be smiling at him, as if she knew it was a matter of time before he finally understood.

Life was for the living, he had no right of wasting it.

It was time for him to go home.