The Other Side of the Line

Rating: M
Warnings: Swearing, Self-Harm, Abuse.

A/N: Thanks to

riwouldntleaveher for the prompt which can be seen just below.

Jane calls suicide help line, after being kidnapped by Hoyt, and Maura is the person that answers her calls. Maura falls in love with the woman on the other line, but what happens when Jane tells her she is finally about to take her own life?

The First Call

It was just another day in Maura Isles' life, taking calls and trying to help in anyway she could. She had been trained not to become emotionally involved in the calls she took but this one in particular was different.

"Hello, how can I help you?" Maura repeated that sentence hundreds of times a day and although it was the same every time she meant it. She was dedicated to her job having spent two years there, much longer than anyone else in the office; after all working just above minimum wage you had to genuinely want to help if you were going to last here.

"...Uh..." The unknown callers voice was off to a nervous and shaky start.

"I uh, need to uh, talk to someone. I just.. I don't know I, I don't know where else to go to." The woman's words on the other line got distorted like a payphone in the rain as the sobs fell from her mouth.

"Are you feeling hopeless?" Maura asked carefully trying to sound as understanding as she could. She kept her emotions in check trying to do the best she could for this person but for some reason the utter desperation and loss in the other woman's voice seeped inside of her causing Maura to tear up the tiniest bit.

"I'm feeling... I don't know how the fuck I'm feeling!" Anger filled the woman's voice before she abruptly apologised. "I'm sorry I'm... I'm just frustrated at myself, at life. It's fuckin' hard to... Talk about my emotions. I'm sure you've fuckin' heard of me anyway. The fucking victim of that sick Hoyt. Every fucker out there knows what he did to me after it was fuckin' leaked!"

Maura froze. She knew exactly who she was talking to. Jane Rizzoli. Detective Jane Rizzoli. This new information had done what she thought impossible; caused her to panic, lose her place. She closed her eyes tightly conjuring up a response before Jane decided to hang up.

"...W-well my name is Maura and you're welcome to talk about your feelings. I'm here not to judge but to try my best to help you."

"I just feel so empty... Like he took something from me, like I'm not... I'm not myself. Before I was a strong detective, I was fuckingJane Rizzoli then he got to me and he still has me... I'll never be free." Jane was sobbing loudly now scratching at her arm as she tried to calm herself so she could actually be understood by the call centre worker.

"I'm here for you. I care about you Jane, if you need someone I'll come to you." Those words could have gotten Maura fired but she couldn't help herself. She knew Jane Rizzoli. She looked up to the Detective. All Maura's professionalism left the moment she heard who it was and the amount of emotions she was feeling doubled as she knew just what this poor woman went through under the hands of Hoyt.

"No it's.. It's okay. I just need to calm down." Jane struggled to settle down. She wasn't in a good place at all, she was at home in the bathroom with a knife on the counter. Staring at it she kept switching from two thoughts.

'Kill yourself, make it all end.' And 'You can't do that, you're a survivor!'. Each thought ran around in her mind pushing each other around, wrestling with logic and feelings.

"Are you feeling as though you could hurt yourself?" Maura asked, worry in her voice evident. The voice inside her head told her to act professional! That it wasn't personal! But her heart gave in causing her to care immensely about the well-being for this woman more than she should. Hell, she already risked her career telling Jane she'd come to her. Was it because she could put a face to the voice? Because she admired the woman she was trying to help even though Maura herself was unknown to Jane? Much like Jane, Maura too was struggling with the clash of logic vs. feelings and it seemed this time that feelings were going to win for once.

"I.. I dunno. I don't think so. I just need to take a shower. Thanks for talking to me... I'm a bit calmer now."

"Are you leaving now?" Maura frowned a little as the feeling of sadness overtook her. Why was she sad with the thought that this woman might leave? It confused her and almost made her feel sick.

"I want to keep talking to you..." Jane whispered out, the neediness was heard in her voice. "But I should go."

"You are welcome to keep talking if you want and also I'd like to inform you that you're welcome to call the help line whenever you want. If you want to specifically ask for me that's fine too."

"You... You want me to go?" Jane knew she was being irrational but she felt so alone, so vulnerable right now. She needed to be wanted for something, for anything. To reach out and have something to hold onto because at the moment she found herself feeling as though she had fuck all.

"I absolutely do not wish you to go if you don't want to go. I'm here as long as you need to talk about whatever. Rainbows, puppies and sunshine included if that's what you want."

"In that case..."

Maura had talked to Jane for three hours straight. They had talked about Jane's job, their love lives or lack therof until Jane finally admitted she needed to go to sleep. After setting down the phone Maura looked at the clock alarmed at how long she had spent talking to this woman. She was also due to finish work 2 hours ago but she didn't regret a thing. It wasn't as though she needed the money. She had lots of it. She did this because she knew what it felt like to be desperate, to need help. To be so close to ending her own life. She did this to help.

Having hear Jane Rizzoli laugh after how upset she was when she first called was reward enough for Maura as she left the building with a smile on her face replaying parts of the conversation she had with Jane in her head.

The Eleventh Call.

"Maur, fuck, fuck I need to talk to you. I fuckin' can't sleep without having nightmares, waking up screaming because I think he's in my room." Jane wept on the phone.

"Jane, it's okay I'm here. Are you thinking about hurting yourself?" Even though Maura had overstepped the boundaries of professionalism with Jane she still stuck to the basic questions to make sure Jane wasn't going to hurt herself. Then she would cheer Jane up by talking about happier things and get to know each other even more than they already did. Maura was a private person but she found herself revealing a lot to Jane.

"No, no I was just... Upset and you make me... feel better." Jane's voice went quiet as she spoke. She knew she was probably abusing this hotline but she couldn't help herself. She was addicted to how Maura made her feel and the comfort she provided.

Unbeknown to Jane; her words had caused Maura to blush. "Thank you. I do try my best. How do you feel right now?"

"I'm feeling better now that.. I'm talking to you." Jane smiled to herself as she wiped the tears from her eyes and stood up from her bed walking to the couch in the living room, plunking herself down getting ready to talk to Maura for hours.

"Did you try what I suggested the other day?" Maura asked as she felt herself relax in her chair, one hand in her hair and the other drawing doodles on a piece of paper as she chat to Rizzoli – The highlight of her day.

"What? Yoga? Yeuck." Jane stuck her tongue out before chuckling.

"I swear Jane, it clears your mind and soul." Maura chuckled back before finding herself involuntarily adding "I'm going to make you do partner yoga with me."

"What, so I'll be like your partner?" Jane grinned, amused with herself.

"Well, when you put it that way..." Maura trailed off giggling before glancing at the piece of paper she was drawing on and found that she had absent-mindedly been drawing love hearts all over the page. She had been wondering late at night while in bed if she was developing feelings for the woman she found herself speaking to for hours on end and the love hearts only cemented the fact that she was. She was falling for this woman. It was so utterly reckless of her but she couldn't help herself.

"Why are you single anyway?" Jane asked, her tone went from amusement to a more serious one as she was sat on the couch twirling her hair around her finger.

Maura paused for a few seconds trying to figure out how to reply. She felt her heart start to race as she contemplated an answer.

"I guess it's just hard to find someone. I'm not a very social person." Maura admitted adding a chuckle at the end to make it not as sad as it sounded.

"Sometimes you find someone without realising it." Jane commented, "I better go now though Maur. It's been great talking to you."

"You too Jane." Maura said with a smile. "You too." She said again once Jane put down the phone, her smile faltered a little.

The Last Call.

"Jane, sweetie are you okay?"All Maura heard on the other hand was painful sobbing and despair.

"No!" Jane sobbed out. "It's it. This is it. I can't do this any more. I can't. I just.. I just can't deal with this. The only person I can-can talk to is a woman at a suicide hot line!" Jane's voice raised, anger hitting her hard. That anger directed at herself partly for developing feelings for a faceless woman on the phone, to someone she could never have.

"Jane, please" Now Maura herself could hear the desperation pouring out of her voice. "Please don't do that. I'm here for you. Please." Now Maura was almost begging. A million thoughts ran through her head but the most prevalent one was 'I can't lose her!'

"Thank you for everything Maura. Honestly." Jane eventually said, her tone sombre, almost blank.

Maura didn't know what else to do. She jumped up from her chair as she almost yelled "I need you!" She didn't even acknowledge the states from her co-workers as the line went dead. She just collapsed back into her chair, her hands on her face as she sobbed into them before shaking her head and ripping her drawer open. Jane had told her where she lived and Maura had written it down. She quickly went through her paperwork before she found what she was looking for and ran out the door.

–

"Jane! Jane open up! Are you there!?" Maura banged on the apartment door before putting her ear against the wood trying to hear Jane, trying to hear anything but only silence fell on her ears. She grabbed a pair of tweezers and a hair pin out of her pocket and got to work on the lock until she heard a click and finally broke it.

Maura was inside Jane's apartment in seconds, her eyes searching the room for the Detective before searching inside every door before she opened the last one – Jane's bedroom and there she was, sat on the edge of the bed with a gun in her hands with her back to Maura. She was too numb, too disembodied that she didn't even care to look up when she heard her front door open nor did she bother to look up at who invaded her bedroom.

"Go away." She simply muttered, her voice telling a story of defeat and emptiness.

"...Jane please don't! I told you, I need you!" Maura stood at the doorway not wanting to make a move closer in case Jane brought the gun up and pulled the trigger.

Jane tensed up as she heard the voice; she recognised it. It was Maura.

"Maur?" Jane whispered weakly afraid to turn around to see the woman behind the voice.

"Yes, it's me. I told you I'd come if you needed me and I'm here." Tears were falling down Maura's face as she stared intently at the woman she found herself in love with.

"Is it... Is it really you?" Jane's voice got higher, hopeful almost.

"Turn around, I'm here!"

Jane slowly but surely turned her body before looking up and the sight before her took her breath away. Maura was more beautiful than Jane could have ever imagined and before she could get up Maura moved to her slowly taking the gun from Jane's hands and throwing it over to the other side of the room.

"I'm here Jane, I'm here." Maura whispered as she held onto Jane's hands.

Jane finally broke down completely and started sobbing as she ripped her hands from Maura's just so she could grab Maura into a hug, burying her face against the blondes shoulder. "You're really here. You're... You're really here." Jane choked on her words as her hands tightened their grip on Maura afraid if she let loose that Maura would disappear, that the only light in her life for the past few weeks would leave.

"I'm not going anywhere." Maura promised, her hands caressing Jane's back soothing her.

Eventually Jane let her grip lose as she pulled back to look at Maura and take in her beauty before making her move, her face neared Maura's as her eyes closed and her lips touched the blondes who returned the kiss.

"I love you, Jane." Maura confessed as they broke the kiss silently taking a vow to herself to never let Jane hurt herself again.

Thanks for reading.