A/N

So, I had the misfortune of coming across the patch song Here Comes Vi recently. I say misfortune because for awhile I couldn't get the damn thing out of my head. Seeing that Jinx had the right idea in parodying it, I felt I could give myself some shrink treatment and finish the job.

So yeah, parody/adaptive song. Something to be sung rather than read.

Loser

She's such a loser, already ready to cry,

I can tell that deep down, she wants to curl up and die.

She thinks she's so tough, but I know that's wrong,

And if she just saw that I know we'd get along.

…

She's a failure, she should know to give up.

One of these days she's going to bite the dust.

So remember this Vi, when you're chasing me,

I am all I am, what you can never be.

…

Come on darlin', oh don't you see,

That we could be friends, not be enemies?

Sure I've broken bones, torn off some roofs,

But just consider that my own type of proof,

That anarchy, baby, it's the only way,

It's time to stop being uptight, girl it's time to play,

Come on, admit it, you enjoy my hijinks,

And deep down you wish, that your name it was Jinx.

…

Cause you silly girl, it's a matter of fact,

That I'll always be faster, you can't react.

As long as you be chasin' you'll get broken bones.

And a city left in rubble, just a pile of stones.

…

Come on darlin', oh don't you see,

That we could be friends, not be enemies?

Sure I've broken bones, torn off some roofs,

But just consider that my own type of proof,

That anarchy, baby, it's the only way,

It's time to stop being uptight, girl it's time to play,

Come on, admit, you enjoy my hijinks,

And deep down you wish, that your name it was Jinx.