A Sudden Grace

Vocabulary: pseudo-elvish and/or obscure words used in this story:

bestlhing: 'marriage cloth';

gullach: magic fire;

herves: wife;

lhug: snake;

melui: lovely, sweet;

milgwaedh:love bond;

milinant: 'love-thought-gift', the love bond with telepathy added;

tirrestil: chaperon;

twitterpation: state of being lovestruck/smitten/excited or overcome by romantic feelings (extrapolated from "twitterpated").

When spark of love finds the soul's true love bond,

A touch will cause you your true love to miss;

A touch and your hearts will grow ever fond;

Unquenchable fire will burn in a kiss.

(an Elvish poem, in the common tongue)

This little history is written by Tinnuel of the Silvan elves for my children, and for any youngling among the Elves who wishes to know what it is like when you find the milgwaedh, the love bond, or the milinant, the bond of minds, in your life mate; For we who find these do not always have a choice in the matter. Mine proved to be fortunate in the end. So read on, younglings, if you want to know.

_"Romance is a sudden and miraculous grace: never to be counted on to recur.―J.R.

Chapter 1

We hated each other by the time we hit puberty. It was just as well, it made things so much easier, for a while. We could avoid each other, and especially, avoid touching each other!

Our peers were on the hunt, searching for the milinant; or, alternatively ,the milgwaedh, the bond of love without the telepathy of the milinant. The "younglings", as their elders called them, made it a standard practice to touch anyone new of the opposite sex, who was anywhere near their age, as soon as possible after meeting them. Since touching was frowned upon by the elders, the younglings contrived excuses to enable it. They managed to arrange practices and contests of active pursuits that kept the elders too busy to see every chance (or planned) encounter.

I noticed that Taen and many other youths delighted in finding girls who did NOT spark a bond with them, so they could practice kissing. I even took advantage of this a few times myself, but then I quit. I found it strangely unappealing to kiss younglings who meant little or nothing to me. In spite of myself, I wondered if the kisses of someone like, say, Taen would be more appealing than theirs, even if I hated him, not liked him. I wished I was as bold as my best friend, Faeleth, who had practiced kissing the boys long before any of them, or either of us, reached puberty.

On the day I saw Taen kissing my best friend, I suddenly felt angry. Why? I could not be jealous of him, surely; it must Faeleth and our friendship that I was worried about. They had ducked behind a tree. The trunk was the width of four men standing side by side so it hid them from view of our tirrestil, Raeneth. She was a fierce elf who watched us like a hawk, but the war game we played enabled us to stalk each other: often behind the trees.

I stood in the shadow of the next tree, mouth agape, when I saw Taen kissing Faeleth. I was in shock, frozen watching them. His hands were on her upper arms, and hers roamed shamelessly over his back.

"Aha!" A hand grasped my shoulder. "Got you!" exclaimed Peng, my opponent. I had forgotten to flee him. His eyes darted nervously to the kissing couple and hesitantly back to me. His eyebrows rose, and he pulled insistently on my shoulder. I scowled at him.

"Younglings!" bellowed Raeneth, our tirrestil. Taen and Faeleth sprang guiltily apart.

Then Peng raised his other arm in a gesture of triumph, calling "Got one!" His hand gripped my shoulder tightly. I glared at Taen and Faeleth. Faeleth grabbed Taen's shoulder, and he let her capture him, that orc! It was so unfair! Taen did it solely to make me look bad, I was sure. Faeleth compounded my humiliation by grinning triumphantly at me as she led Taen out into view of Raeneth.

That evening, I sat brooding in our flet. Taen must have wanted to humiliate me, to make up for losing to me in the archery contest. Oh, how I hated him! And then, to kiss Faeleth right in front of me! My thoughts raged around for a while, then drifted back to last year…

Taen and I had dodged behind a wall of shrubbery in a Capture game similar to the one I just mentioned. I was flattened against a prickly shrub, so I had edged away from the spiky branches, thinking I was alone, when he appeared. He grinned and stalked toward me. Before I could decide which way to go, he slipped up behind me. His arms grasped me firmly against his chest. One arm was around my chest, the other across my collarbone. I was too startled to think, and I was mad. It was a strangely pleasant feeling to be held by him, but it made me feel unsettled.

"Tinnuel!" he murmured, his voice husky. It was changing, last year. "I got you." His breath and his long hair tickled my cheek. I turned my head slightly to look, and the proximity of his face startled me. He was between me and the scratchy shrub...Resisting the pleasant feelings, I shoved him backward. "Ow!" he yelped, letting me go. I darted away, laughing, and the chase was on…

The recollection troubled me as I sat. What would it be like to let Taen kiss me, like he had Faeleth? (Not that he would want to.) "Ew!" I said aloud. After all, we hated each other. He was so annoying, always challenging me in some contest that I, mostly, won.

To be fair, I have to admit that as we grew, he did not challenge me at things that depended on strength, like combat with greatswords. He had gained on me in height. I remember how, when our heights still matched, he had outweighed me. His blond head came up to the same height as my black-haired one, his green eyes were on a level with my blue ones, last year. But once he sat on me, and I could not get up. He was too heavy.

Raeneth calls us all over to listen, in the morning of the next day. "Younglings, the warriors among you will be going apart to train with the Guard. Today we will practice together one last time."

Faeleth elbows me, a devilish gleam in her eye. "You had better hurry and kiss a few, today, before they leave!" she urges. "Maybe Taen, he is fun to kiss! What? Do not look at me that way, he is."

I glare at her. "My enemy? You know we dislike each other! Boys want girls they can beat at contests." I pout. She glares back at me.

"What, like me? Is that what you mean? Fine, Tinnuel, I will quit trying to help you. Taen lets you win, can't you tell?" She turns her back on me. I relent.

"I am sorry, Faeleth, that is not what I meant! Besides, who wants to find the milinant or milgwaedh right before you mate gets sent away?"

"I do." says Fae emphatically.

"What? Are you crazy? But then he will be gone!"

"But then you would know who he is! And then you could quit searching."

I peer at her doubtfully. Does she want to keep playing around, free of worry, with her life mate gone elsewhere?

"Then I could plan, silly!" scolds Faeleth, a dreamy look in her eyes. "I could set up our flet the way I want it, while he's away…" She has a point, maybe it would be freeing to know who your mate was…

"No! Then you'd be beholden to his family." I protest.

"Useful knowledge!" snaps Faeleth. "Think! I f you get along well, you can work with them and be firmly in control before he comes back. If you do not, you have time to figure out how to handle them." I stare at her, amazed.

"Wow, Fae, you have thought this out!"

"Yes, silly. Maybe you would have to, if you had your family around." I cross my arms, clutching myself tightly. I am a fosterling here among the Silvan elves. My 'family' here was a flet full of fosterlings.

"Younglings!" barks Raeneth, "No chatter! Now, today you will be hunted by Spiders. March!" We all line up. Taen's voice comes over my shoulder, startling me.

"Ha! Now I have a chance to web you!" I shoot him a quick glare. He looks so smug, his slanted green eyes flashing, flaunting his muscular arms with a sleeveless jerkin.

"Tinnuel!" barks Raeneth. I snap my head back to the front, lifting my chin, jaw clenched. He did it again, got me in trouble. Raeneth is loudly reiterating all the rules of the Spiders game. I know them by hear, so my attention drifts. My wayward thoughts are of that past game, when Taen held me in his arms. My face feels hot.

Faeleth murmurs "You're blushing, take a deep breath!" I do, trying to calm my racing heartbeat. As we come to the end of the clearing, Raeneth calls us to a stop.

"Warriors, today you will be the Spiders." she announces. My heart sinks. Until now, I had a thin hope that the roles would be reversed. But, admittedly, the warriors should have an easier time webbing and lifting us, with their superior strength. In fact, they could catch us one on one, and not have to team up in pairs, like the rest of us do when we are the Spiders. The whole game was designed to prepare us to face the real giant spiders that dwell in the forest. I shudder, thinking of them. They are each about the size of an adult elf. The elders say they are getting bigger. Raeneth remembers when they were only half as big as they are now. She says that was two or three hundred years ago. Some of my fellow fosterlings were orphaned by giant spiders.

A shrill whistle sounds. It is the signal to start the game. The warriors vanish into the forest to set up their ambushes. They will be allowed to team up, like the real spiders do. I gulp and look nervously around. Only Faeleth looks back at me. "Hey," I say, "how about teaming up? We can escape webbing more easily, if we help each other."

"Not allowed today. Weren't you listening, silly?" scoffs Faeleth. I frown. "Raeneth said we need to practice getting away individually, to better our odds of survival." says Faeleth.

"Oh, wargs!" I exclaim in disgust. Before I can think of another plan, a horn sounds. Our turn to go into the forest. I panic for a moment, balking. Maybe I can go quietly somewhere else, and return at the end of the game…

"Ow!" A sharp jab in the ribs from Raeneth startles me back. "Get going, fosterling!" she barks at me. I run for the trees, eyes darting side to side. No 'Spiders' so far. As I reach full cover of the forest, the light dims. Giant tree trunks loom all around me. If only we could team up! My eyes are not as good at seeing in the dim light as most of my peers' eyes are. Faeleth says it must mean I'm half-elf, half-human. Well, I am good at hiding. I wrap my elven cloak tighter around me, and pull the hood forward so my face is hidden in its shadow. I stand against a tree with branches so high that even the warriors should not be able to climb it.

A shaft of golden sunlight filters past me, motes sparkling. The forest is hushed. All of us running in must have scared silent the birds and animals. Faint rustles betray some of my peers as they move about. I glide silently from one trunk to the next, my eyes adjusting to the gloom. Looking across a small clearing I see a flicker of movement and I freeze. An elf shrieks as she is grabbed by two warriors and dragged off her feet. They pull her, kicking, into the shadow of the trees. Muffled curses carry across the clearing, slowly fading away.

As I stand frozen, a running warrior approaches me. I hold my breath, and he dashes past me and across the end of the clearing. He vanishes into the forest and I hear a squeal and a scuffle, then silence again. I breathe carefully, peering around me. Cautiously I step away from the tree, toward the next trunk, about eight steps away. As I tiptoe, my foot slips over a rock and snaps a twig, CRACK! I dart to the tree, but I have been spotted. A hulking shape looms out from a tree in the gloom, and starts toward me. I run, dodging trees in a zigzag pattern. Spying a brushy thicket, I double back around a trunk and dive into the bushes. Ouch! It is a prickly bush, like I pushed Taen into. Biting back my cry, I clench my mouth shut. The hulk chasing me lumbers past, and the thuds of his feet fade away as he keeps going straight.

After a few moments, I gasp in a deep breath of air. A giggle of relief escapes me. A deep chuckle answers, and I gasp in shock. Taen grins at me over the bush. As I struggle upright, he clasps my hands with his suede gloves and hauls me out. I wriggle furiously in his grasp. He laughs lightly at me, the jerk! "Come on, Tinnuel, you don't want to be in that bush." he says, tugging at my hands. "Believe me, I know!"

"Hush!" I hiss. We don't want others to hear. If I got away, they would catch me! I glare at him. His green eyes are wide in the gloom. I meet his gaze and stand mesmerized, my heart thudding. Then there is a snap and two forms loom out of the trees, headed our way. Taen wraps an arm around me and dives. We end up in the bushes. His gloved had is over my mouth and I kick in frustration as he rolls behind me.

"Shh!" he whispers in my ear. The figures come into view and I stiffen. They are the twins, a pair of warrior brutes: Sarn and Thand. Sarn managed to kiss me once, when we were younger. I cringe, remembering that he slobbered. Ew! He kept trying to catch me again, after that. I tremble, and Taen's arm tightens around me. I hold my breath, and he does, too, as Thand trudges right past our bush. Sarn looks all around, then Thand calls out "This way!" and they head off into the forest.

After a few moments, I gasp and breathe again. My chest presses against Taen's arm. Then I feel his chest rising and falling against my back. Time stops as my senses heighten. His legs nudge the backs of my thighs and knees, warmth seeping through our leggings. His breath tickles my neck; it sounds ragged. His arm around my chest is strangely comforting. His earthly woodland smell tickles my nostrils.

I squirm, and the bush scratches me. Okay, he is nicer to lean against than that. "Ow!" I mutter, but Taen's arm around me does not loosen. I try to relax my breathing, as his puffs in time with mine, but my awareness of him keeps mine fast, in time with my thudding heart. "You can let me go," I whisper, "They won't chase you."

"Ha!" says Taen, "Thand promised to pound me, if he caught me alone. I beat him yesterday at swordplay." I squirm, and catch him off guard. I manage to wriggle my upper body out of his grasp and roll forward to lie on my front, halfway out of the bush. Taen grabs me by the waist and one shoulder, and rolls me back. Then he plops on top of me! I am so mad! Then I hear the thudding of footsteps close by.

"Shh!" he hisses in my ear. Sarn and Thand go tromping past again! "Last look, Sarn, that's all!" grumbles Thand.

"All right, we'll look elsewhere." mutters Sarn. Their footsteps fade away again.

I am pressed from shoulder to ankles by Taen's body, yet he feels surprisingly light. I blink as he shifts and raises his head from over my shoulder. His eyes meet mine for a breathless moment.