Rattlesnake Jake was alert and wide awake, though you wouldn't have known that if you'd seen him: his fiery eyes were closed as if in slumber and his muscular coils were, well, coiled like he was still dreaming. But this rattler was listening. Listening intently for a follow-up to a sound he had heard not too long ago. A gun shot.

Most likely it was one of those Dirt inhabitants come out for a pot-shot at roadrunners, or maybe as a warning to some outlaw gunslingers like himself. Or maybe it was Rango, Dirt's chameleon sheriff, just shooting at something in the distance. He usually did that. Jake allowed himself a half smile as he mused. Rango, the outsider who became a local hero and legend; he was a cocky one all right - thought he was a right charmer, but still somewhat lil-livered, especially if he knew he was in over his head, which was quite often. However, he had proved himself to the small desert town of Mud, as well as to Jake himself, that he could be quite valiant. Rango, in one of his delusions, had stated that he and Jake were 'brothers', but that was before he met the fearsome rattler and had the showdown in town. Jake called him that whenever he passed by, as a tease or threat, depending on how he felt towards the chameleon.

Jake's thoughts snapped back to the present as he heard another shot. This time it sounded closer. The shooter was approaching his burrow's general direction and he didn't like it. Even if the shooter went by and paid the rattler no mind, Jake didn't take kindly to the interruption of his "siesta". The rattler frowned and tensed as he opened a fiery eye; an eye that reflected a portal to the very underworld. It was rumored that anyone who stared directly into those eyes of his would burst into flames on the spot. Jake found this thought rather amusing but knew it wasn't true; if it was, he'd have killed a lot of people by now, just by one glance. But still, it was a handy reputation.

He heard something other than a gunshot: it was a rhythmic sound, like running feet. What is it, now? Jake opened his other eye and tasted the air with his forked, black tongue. Roadrunners… figgers. He snorted and shut his eyes again. Not one moment later, they were flicked open and he tasted the air again. He frowned as more scents registered.

Ferret… toads… rats… what in hellfire gives? Jake shifted his coils around and cocked his gun, just in case. The last thing he wanted was to be interrupted now when he was about to take a nap. The rattler waited and, in between intervals of tongue-flicking and listening, was able to pick out whoops and loud cries. Thrill-seekers're more like it, Jake thought. He waited, gradually distinguishing at least five shapes on the horizon from under the brim of his black hat: one in the lead, slapping the haunches of his roadrunner, encouraging it to go faster. It had a long, lean body. The two shapes behind it were short and stocky and the two behind them were stouter than they but nearly as big as the lead figure. Jake waited, feeling a sort of ruthless curiosity towards these loud newcomers.

Presently, the five halted their runners just downwind of where Jake lay. Two toads, two rats and the leader looked to be a big ferret. He was a long, lean fellow with a worn, wide-brimmed brown hat set slightly askew on his head. He had a tattered old overcoat on and clutched a long, fancy-looking machete in his paws. He sniffed the air. Jake made sure to stay hidden and half-closed his eyes, making no sound at all, listening.

"'Kay, do I have to go over this again?" the ferret whispered loudly to his comrades. He sounded younger - well, younger than Jake expected - had to be in his prime, but no older. "First, we sniff this Reaper out, and then if no one's offed, we take him out. Simple as that!"

Jake almost laughed out loud. Those crazy hats are here to ambush me, the Grim Reaper of the West! He stifled his mirth a he watched the scene unfold. They were all pretty rough-looking; the two rats had ammo straps wound bandolier-style across their torsos. They carried some serious-looking firearms. The two toads had a couple throwing knives and a gun apiece. The main ferret's knife, however, looked to be as long as his forearm.

Jake sized up his enemies. Ferret's gotta be the first to go; knock out the leader and those other four'll scatter like roaches in the light. Jake thought with mild disgust. Here I was lookin' forward to takin' the day off, and then come these jokers. He continued to wait as the five ascended to where his burrow was, pointing their weapons at anything that moved. Jake wanted to laugh at them, these five little bitty critters thought they could take down the great legend himself?

Jake went over his plan in his head again as the creatures got closer and closer. Finally, one of the toads peeked into his burrow and squinted in the dim light. Jake's eyes were closed under his hat brim but he heard everything going on.

"I think I see 'im!" the toad whispered excitedly. He was met by a swift clout to the head by the ferret who hissed.

"Shh-ut it, ya moron!" Well, so much for being 'shut up'. The ferret glanced inside the cave and licked his lips. He didn't relish this idea in the slightest, but motioned his gang to back up. "I'm goin' in, get ready."

Come and get it, little man, Jake was tickled pink. He tasted the air with his tongue, sensing the ferret's tentative approach. He had to admit the ferret was quite soft-pawed. If he hadn't smelled him, the snake doubted he would have noticed the mustelid's presence at all. Rattlesnake Jake could afford to be generous now. Closer and closer…

I'm on a Rango streak, so sue me XP