Warning this chapter is mostly CRACK and I died as I wrote this, and because I almost died, I almost didn't finish it. XD

I don't own Harry Potter, or any Disney, Pixar or anything of relation to such. I do own Stephen, Roar, Lucrectea, Damen, most Oc's in this fic, BUT I do not own Lucine, she belongs to Lostgurl09.

Lostgurl09 is allowed to use my oc, and me hers, she is also writing a wonderful fic that this one is AU too, hers also takes place a year after this one but the plots are totally different

Imagine Dragons 10

Dear Luca,

I can't believe they made you leave early, thou I been this is more of extra vaca for you but who are you staying with, your parental units refuse to tell me. Umbitch is gone, McGonagall was furious and practically told the ministry to get their bloody noses out of the schools business. Anyway I'm bored, I miss you, I need you Luca!

p.s. Oliver took me on a date to the Quidditch pitch, we had a picnic! Squeal! Yes I actually wrote that, get over it!

Lots of loves,

Lucine

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Lucine,

Why in the hell would anyone start a letter with 'Dear' it sounds like your talking to your spouse, and no Lucine I. Am. Not. Your. Lesbian. Lover.

I'm at Potter manner with Lilly Potter, Papa sent me here expecting me to work myself to the bone, but Lilly only has me helping her with the garden, and regular house hold chores that don't really bother me.

Luca

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Dear Luca,

I do what ever I want, thank you very much, and that hurt. It hurt real bad, I actually started to cry in the middle of the great hall and everyone asked what was wrong and I told them that you denied our lesbian love! Oh and Regulus found out about you telling me that you're at the potter's he was not happy then he demanded to see the other letter's and found out that I demanded to find out, Tom was not pleased, nether was my papa. THEY GAVE ME THE DETENTIONS! BUT THEY PUT ME WITH OLIVER! IT WAS AWESOME AND WE MOSTLY SNOGGED THE WHOLE TIME, SORRY NOT SORRY ABOUT GROSSING YOU OUT!

Lots of loves,

Lucine

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Lucine,

That's. . . nice, and I don't feel bad for you getting detention. You don't need to send me any more letters Christmas break start tomorrow.

Luca

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Luca put down the quill and placed the letter in the off white envelope, she handed it to her pure white barn owl Tallen. He nipped at her fingers happily and took off thru the window. Luca sighed running a hand over her face and got ready for bed.

The next morning Luca was rudely awakened by Harry bursting in her room and jumping her while she was still in bed, after him came Stephen who joined them.

"Luca, thank you so much!" Stephen said, Harry nodded and sat up. Luca was winded but managed to pull herself up. "You have no idea how much that mean to me, I mean Levi h-he was so worried." Luca pushed his head gently away.

"Tis fine now." She said, she looked up at her now dubbed Bellatrix hair, and smiled almost creepily, thou Harry nor Stephen saw for they were heading back out of room.

"Oh Luca your Mum is here to pick you up." He turned his back to her. Luca crept forward her eyes on her prey, her red eyes gleaming in mischief. She pounced.

"I AM NEMO, AND ONLY I GET TO TOUCH THIS FABULOUS BOOTY!"

"LUCA WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!" Screamed Harry followed by evil laughter. The adults startled ran up a flight of stairs so see Stephen holding onto the wall trying to keep himself from falling, tears were in his eyes as he fought to stay up. Then they saw Luca who was holding into Harry exclaiming about being a fish who gets to touch butts. Harry had a laughable expression on his face, it was beat red.

"Lucrectea Medusa Black-Riddle will you please take your hand off my bum."

"BUT I AM NEMO, AND I SHALL TOUCH ALL OF THE BUTTS! Except you papa, now that would be weird." Luca giggled. Everyone looked at her strangely, well except Regulus. he looked over at them.

"What she's a Black, the madness slips out sometimes." James and Lilly nodded amused.

"What is a Nemo?" Harry asked trying to pry Luca's arms off of him.

"It's a Disney Pixar movie that won't come out for a long time." She explained.

"Still can't believe you and Lucine went to that lady so see the future Disney movies." Harry said annoyed. Luca tightened her hold and squeezed his butt before jumping off of him and running to her papa jumping into his arms.

"Papa I missed you!" She threw her arms around his neck, and kissing him on the cheek. "How's Lucine?" She asked, Regulus sighed.

"Pouty."

"Why?"

"Because she's grounded."

"Why's that."

"She threatened to kill a ministry worker, Luca."

"So did I!"

"And nearly killed the woman!"

"I did."

"Luca, you nearly killed someone, that could send you life in Azkaban."

"Then it will become a party!"

"Hows-?" James started but quickly shut his mouth. Lilly patted his arm and told her boys to go down stairs.

"I'll be taking my deranged daughter off your hands, thank you for watching her." Regulus told Lilly who smiled kindly at him.

"She was a blessing for the garden, I was glad to have her over, but hopefully this wont become a habit." Luca snorted and left her papa drag her off.

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"Luca!" Lucine shouted when she saw her best friend step out of the floo, Regulus behind her. Luca's eyes lit up when she saw her and threw herself at Lucine.

"Lucine guess what!"

"What?"

"I'm Nemo!"

"Nemo!"

"Yes, I touched the butt!"

"Who's Butt!" Luca leaned forward and whispered in her ear.

"Harry's butt." Lucine gasped and started jumping up and down.

"Luca I declare an quest!"

"Oh?"

"WE shall touch. . . Draco's Butt." She whispered, Luca gasped and looked around not seeing the blond ferret boy anywhere.

"Hehehehehehe." Luca laughed.

"Is Luca suffering from the sillies?" Lucine asked Regulus grinning, he returned it with a nod. Lucine let out a whoop, fist pumping the air and dragged Luca along for their adventure. "So, Luca want know why I why I demanded this quest?"

"Because I touched the butt?" Luca giggled.

"NO!" Lucine shouted thrusting a door open and threw herself and Luca in and considering the décor: green, silver, black with Slytherin all over the place, it must be Draco's room. Lucine dragged Luca to Draco's bed and together they plopped down in it. "I was thinking that we haven't been touching enough butts, I mean have you touched Charlie's?" Luca was dying now, shaking her head vigorously. "Have you even look at his butt?" Luca paused eyeing Lucine with glee and nodded.

"Yes, I may have taken a peak. Have you seen Oliver's." Lucine turned beat red from the question.

"I don't want to answer that!" Lucine said throwing her head in her hands blushing like mad. Luca burst out laughing and nearly fell off the bead. "Wow, this black madness is hitting you hard this time, just hope you don't end up like aunty Bella." Luca snorted.

"So we're going to touch the booty, so I can appease my Nemo instincts?"

"Best future movie ever." Lucine mumbles as she nods. "Yes my dear land-clown-fish-impersonator you shall appease your Nemo instincts." Luca whooped and they were off. It didn't take long to find Draco, he was in the library but once he saw them he paled.

"What do you want?" Demanded Draco closing the book he had been reading.

"I'm Nemo." Luca stated simply, nodding. Draco gave her a look the was the perfect mix of confusion and a sneer.

"What's a Nemo?"

"I'm Nemo, Draco."

"I can tell." It was quiet for a second.

"Draco?"

"Yes, Luca?"

"I'MA TOUCH YOUR GLORIOUS BUTT!" She yelled pouncing at him. Draco threw himself to the side narrowly missing her arms as she tried to grab him. "DAMN!"

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL LUCA!" He shouted as he bolted out of the library.

"I'm Nemo and only I get to touch the butts!" Whined Luca. Lucine laughed evilly chasing after him. Do began their game of cat an mouse, narrowly catching him, and him using the house elves to keep himself safe. Today everyone else was coming over for Christmas, and yes all of them are staying the night. Lucine some how convinced uncle Lucius, not sure how thou. Everyone: Snape-Lupin's, Black-Riddle's, the Potter's, The Nott's, The Parkinson's, Other Slytherin families, The Weasley's (Surprisingly (took hours to convince him)). and after much begging Oliver Wood. They all just arrived waiting in one of the many parlors of Malfoy manner waiting patiently for dinner to start, but Lucine and Luca were not with the others, no they were setting up their ambush for Draco.

Draco was standing in a corner, that was their chance. Darting into the room catching everyone's attention but Draco's (apparently he was zoning all the loud talking out). They pounced on him wrapping their arms about Draco who let out a shout of surprise. Luca had hugged him from in front and Lucine from behind

"Luca will you get the bloody hell off of me!" He struggled but Luca chuckled and patted his blond head.

"Shh, don't try to fight this." Luca cooed.

"just embrace it." Lucine said. "Luca, you are Nemo so you get first touch."

"I AM NEMO!" Shouted Luca and grabbed. Draco froze, he was frozen for a while, no one could see what happened because Lucine was in the way. "psssst Lucine, Draco's butt is awesome, better then Harry's!" She whispered so only Lucine and Draco could hear. Draco's pail face resembled that of a ripe strawberry. Then Lucine reached down and grabbed it. Everyone was silent, well silent until one Harry James Potter burst out laughing.

"Harry this is not funny!" Exclaimed a red faced Draco. This sadly for Draco only made Harry laugh harder. Then Lucine (Who by the way still had her hand cupping his perfectly round pure blood arse) started to giggle quite loudly followed by Luca almost insane giggling. Soon everyone even the wide eyed Weasley's were ether chuckling lightly or lightly laughing awkwardly. Luca let go of poor Draco who was still in the grasp of a very pleased Lucine. She skipped (yes Luca skipped) all the way to her father and threw her arms around him. Tom instantly returned it kissing her on the forehead.

"How are you little moon?"

"Good." She told him releasing from her hold and bouncing on the balls of her feet before skipping once again over to the Weasley twins. They laughed at this for they seen it before during a Quidditch game. "Gred! Forge!" She exclaimed drawing them both into a hug, looking up she greeted Bill with a smile. He returned it with a secretive wink. By the corner Ron and Ginny stood off in a corner, they weren't invited but they weren't trusted to be left home by themselves. As everyone obsessed over butts and what not Tom and Severus stood watching their daughters feeling a little disturbed at the sight they didn't see their husbands walk up from behind but the soon found out when their perfectly sculpted asses were groped.

This is getting very long and it's getting to that time of the year so enjoy this chapter 10 part 1!