Disclaimer: I own nothing that is related to Harry Potter or other works recognisable by the human eye, unless so decreed by the court of law. OC's owned by me will be visible and not belonging to J.K. Rowling or any other recognised author.

Warning(s): Slash, OC's, dry humour, Dumbledore Bashing, Good Magical Petunia, Vernon Bashing, Good Magical Dudley, Seer Luna, Rune worker Harry, Powerful Magic Ron, Powerful Magic Hermione, Earth Element Neville, and exceptionally cute Justin Finch-Fletchly, Cunning Slytherins (with exception for all Slytherins but Blaise, Daphne, Tracey, Snape, and Goyle), Stupid Crabbe, Studious Draco. Mentions of Mental Trauma and Near Rape through enchantment inside. Read With Caution. In Hallow We Trust!

And Now to the Sequel of Making Them All Pay:

A Warder's Summer: The Summer Before Fourth Year (UNEDITED)

Dear Mr. Potter,

According to the law it isn't illegal in anyway to cause women or men to become more fertile against their will. Infact, I'm rather sure that if I'm reading this properly it's applauded. I am unsure; however, of why you and your lover would need this information. Please do use caution if you feel as though you need to go to the next step in your relationship. I wasn't aware you were even dating anyone.

Sincerely,

Madam Bones

Head of the DMLE

Lady of the Matriarchal Ancient and Most Prosperous House of Bones

P.S. It's currently illegal to abort a child.

'Lord' Donaghan Tremlett sat upon his plastic lawn chair throne in angst driven denial. His attack on Ollivander's had failed, the wands of his followers hadn't even sparked when they aimed at the store-front. 'I failed to realise that wands made by an Ollivander might not work against an Ollivander,' He thought, broodingly, in his throne, 'and we can't get wands anywhere else because we're muggleborn.' His brooding shifting swiftly to the anger and hate that often clouded his judgement.

"My Lordship," called one of his flunkies who had followed him as a member of the Weird Sisters, "we have a problem, sir."

"What is it?" He asked the flunky, ploughing down his anger to an acceptable level.

"Witherwings sir, the distinguished Madam Witherwings has been hired to craft wards that will keep any Star of Hope sympathiser's out of Diagon Alley and the Ministry of Magic," the flunky answered, trembling in fear of his Lord and Master.

"I see," Tremlett said in a deceptively calm tone of voice, "is there anyway to avoid this happening without attacking Witherwings?"

"No sir."
"Flunky... I would like to be alone right now. I have the urge to use Unforgivables and I don't want to use them."

"My name's Bob, my Lord."

"Okay, Bob. Just leave."

The flunky, Bob, left swiftly as Donaghan Tremlett returned to his brooding and anger. 'Why does this always happen to me?' The 'Light' lord of the muggleborn thought with a sneer.

"And that, children, is why we don't use transfiguration on other people," Sirius explained after shutting off the projection of a human to animal transfiguration, "because sometimes the human you end up with isn't the same as the one you start out with. It's also why transfiguration is no longer a punishment in most magical school districts. Any questions? Yes, Miss Granger."

"Is it possible to transfigure a dogs gender, to change from a working male body to a working female body?"

"Yes, though I don't believe it's taught at the Hogwarts Newt level. Anything else?"

"My dog is a male, and he sprays... Would it work?" Hermione asked, beaming at the paling professor. Blaise started giggling lightly from across the room where he sat with Daphne and Tracey.

"That is one way to do it," Sirius admitted, "Or you could get him... neutered," He shuddered slightly before continuing which caused a louder giggle to be heard, "Now our hour is up, I'd like a foot of parchment on my desk next class period over what you have learned from the lecture. Off with you all."

"That was cruelly funny Hermione," Harry said as He cleared his desk and walked over to the door to walk to charms.

"Yeah, but it was worth it," Ron commented as the Neville, Hermione, and he walked beside Harry with a smirk, "The look on his face. It almost makes up for the prank that Sirius and Remus pulled on me last week. Just because I said he was getting big..."

"I'm so sure that making you wear Slytherin green was such a horrible thing for picking on the pregnant man," Harry interrupted with a smirk, his hair changed to green. "You just had your girlfriend threaten his testicles."

"It wasn't my idea, all Hermione I swear," Ron denied.

"You expect us to believe that wonderful and sweet Hermione thought of that?" Neville asked, a mock-disappointed look appearing on his face, "For shame on you Ronald Weasley. For Shame."

"Blaming it all on me," Hermione fake huffed as she smiled to her boyfriend, "the nerve. Now I must think of a suitable punishment."

"OOo, is Hermione getting Kinky?" Luna's voice came from behind them, causing Ron and Hermione to jump.

"No," Hermione squeaked out after catching her breath, staring incredulously at Luna, "I am simply thinking of a way to stop him from blaming me in the future."

Neville leaned over to his girlfriend and whispered in her ear before smirking and kissing her on the cheek.

"So she's getting fluffy handcuffs?" Luna asked in a stage-whisper. Ron blanched, knowing the reference from his older brother Bill, and whimpered pitifully. "And the whips and chains too right?"

Harry sniggered as he looked at his fiery haired friend cowering slightly away from the blonde seer.

"I think we may have gone too far with the jokes," Neville pointed out.

"Gone too far with what jokes?" Luna asked obliviously even as they walked along towards the charms hall, "and speaking of going to far, here's my stop, DADA. Have a nice trip to Charms."

The remaining friends walked the rest of the way to the charms corridor and entered the room, making it barely in time for the beginning of the class.

Filius Flitwick walked in with a smile to his classroom, "Good evening class, I'm glad to see you could all make it. Today we will be working on the plant growth charm. As the name implies, it causes plants to grow quickly and in a certain way, page 183 in your text books and please take out your quills and parchment for this," He waited for a few minutes before continuing, "Now, as you may not know, the growth charm originated from 1200 AD when a coven of 100 witches and wizards decided to live in forests and trees in order to stay hidden from the Muggles. They needed many things, though, and this included: Homes, food, places to congregate, and ways to hide. Thus they started experimenting with spells that would cause vegetation to grow quickly and renew the soil that was used. They were successful and created a charm which would enable them to create their houses out of the trees themselves, and to cause fruits to grow quickly as well. When they could, they would charm wild goats and sheep to follow them to the woods and use the wool for their clothing. The society that was created still exists today in the Black Forest and the Forest of Dean of Britain and Dun na Ri of Ireland under heavy illusions and other charms to stay hidden, thus becoming one of the most secluded magical communities. They don't usually send their children to Hogwarts either." He smiled as he saw the people writing, or in the case of a few had their quill writing what he said, "Now that the history lesson is over, I will tell you about the charm itself. It is rather odd as unlike most charms of the age it requires that the caster move his or her wand in the general shape you want the tree to grow. It is also spoken in Irish. The spell is Fothainia." He waved his wand, conjuring several pots with small trees, "I want you to try on these Bonsai trees, they are spelled to never grow bigger than the pot can handle. This will cause a safer learning environment then just letting you all go." He smiled as his class got to work, walking around and correcting pronunciations as he always did. "Good Sue, nice form. Harry, is that a heart? Wonderful Padma, very nice box shape, and Parvati that is as big as it will go, you'll need another. Miss Granger, are those handcuffs? Mr. Weasley why are you shying away from Miss Granger? Good job Neville, I thought you'd get this one."

He walked to and fro about the class before finally saying, "Okay, everyone seems to have the gist of it now. I want you all to take a new tree and make it grow into a miniature house to be brought before me when next we have class. That is two days of magic use. Class Dismissed!"

The quartet of Gryffindor fourth years got up with their trees and walked, somewhat swiftly, towards the doors.

"Should we walk to DADA or to the dorms so we can put these away?" Harry asked of his friends.

"Dorms, otherwise we may injure the plants," Neville said, Hermione and Ron nodding along with the suggestion, "I just wish there was an easy way to get around the castle quickly."

"I know what you mean," commiserated Hermione as they started walking up the various floors to the Gryffindor dorms. "I almost wish there was an elevator or something, but I guess the walking is good for your gluteus."

"Huh?" Ron asked, before Harry leaned in to whisper. A few seconds later he whispered furiously, "Hey.. why are you looking at Neville's arse?"

"It's an expression. I don't look at Neville's butt Ronald... Luna would kill me," Hermione said mirthlessly. "And watch your language."

"Oh, as long as you aren't looking at another guys ar- oh alright butt- I will," Ron said, pouting.

"And if I look at another girls butt?" Hermione asked, her eyebrow arched in annoyance.

"As long as I don't have to watch you, I'd get jealous if I did," Ron said, blushing slightly.

"Good boy," Hermione finished, even as their two friends mouthed 'whipped'.

"Good Evening Class," Melinda Griffin-hold called to her students after setting up a memory projection pensieve, "Today we are reviewing dark curses. Can anyone tell me the three darkest curses known to Britain? Yes Miss Granger."

"The unforgivables," Hermione answered with a slight shudder.

"Good job, five points for Gryffindor," Professor Griffin-hold awarded, "Would anyone like to tell me about these horrible curses? Be warned now that I will be showing you them through memories. Yes Mr Longbottom."

"T... The Cruciatus Curse professor," Neville answered, his voice wavering as it filled with remembered pain.

"Indeed, the Cruciatus is also known by the name the torture curse. It activates all the pain receptors in the targets bodies, overwhelming them with on-going pain," Melinda waved her wand at the projector, causing it to play a memory of a woman with dark hair brandishing her wand at an adult before releasing a foul red lightning. The projection stopped after the target screamed, something so earth-shattering and pain filled that the students paled. "That was a memory of a victim of Bellatrix Lestrange, a foul and evil woman. I am sorry to say I am her third cousin through my father. Next, you Mr. Potter."

"The Imperius Curse," Harry answered, slightly shaken by the image that was shown.

"Indeed, the Imperius Curse is the only unforgivable that can be reliably fought against, or at least it was the only one before Lady Witherwings came out with her wonderful cloaks. The Imperius confers control of a target to the caster. It can be beaten relatively easily with even the weakest use of Occlumency, however those with strong enough will power don't need Occlumency. I'm currently teaching the fifth years Occlumency, and most are succeeding well enough. Now I will show the clip," she waved her wand again, and the students heard 'Imperio' as they saw a man's hazy vision as he took a knife and walked over to a tall blonde lady in a blue dress and stabbed her. The woman screamed loudly as the knife was buried into her gut, causing others to panic and run as thick red blood flowed from the stab wound over the man's hands even as he stabbed again and again before being stunned. The clip ended, a few people looked green and vomit was spewed across Justin's desk. "Don't worry Justin, that's a natural reaction. I'm glad to see everyone here didn't like seeing that clip, as if you had I would have had you expelled quickly. The next curse, anyone, you Mr. Macmillan."

"The Killing Curse Ma'am," the green faced boy said, even as he tried to hold down his lunch.

"Yes, the Killing Curse. It used to be unblock-able, but now it can be blocked successfully nearly 100% of the time by cloaks. I wish they had those back when I was a child during the war," Griffin-hold said before continuing, "Now, before these cloaks were invented only one person had survived the Killing Curse. Mr. Potter. That is why he is the Boy-Who-Lived, because he proved immune to the only fool-proof killing magic in this world. I will show the clip now," Melinda's wand waved, "This is an Aurors memory, so be patient." The clip ran, showing a battlefield. Blood was falling from the sky as bodies blew up from high level curses. One wizard was flinging fire from his hands at his opponent while others used different spells. Suddenly, green magic flew at the fireball wielder, causing him to fall dead. The clip ended as a bloody and shredded body part hit the Auror's head, presumably knocking him out. "I know that was rough, but please know that if I could I'd remove that part of the OWL's. Now I want two rolls of parchment on the unforgivables, no more or less. There is an anti-nausea potion on my desk for anyone who needs it. Have a good lunch." The potions were gone before everyone had left.

Lunch was a rather tense affair for the fourth year Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs. Harry, who was sitting with Justin and Blaise (as Hermione, Ron and Neville just ran into the bathrooms to vomit before taking the potions), was barely able to eat. Blaise was eating a light meal as had DADA after his Runes class. "Is it really that bad?" he asked his boyfriend.

"It's worse," Justin said, moving his grapes from one side of the plate to the other, "I can't even eat grapes."

"But that's your favourite food," Blaise gasped melodramatically, getting a slight smile from his two extremely ill looking friends.

"Just imagine what it would be like if she hadn't given us the potion," Harry added, shuddering, "I don't want to think of how we'd ever eat today."

"Or this week," Justin added in, his skin slightly less green. "I agree that it had to be shown, but I kinda wish we didn't have to see it at the same time."

"I know what you mean," commiserated the green eyed boy-who-lived.

"Enough commiserating, people already think we have an unholy threesome going on. Don't give them fodder," Blaise teased.

"I dunno, I think I'd enjoy kissing Harry," Justin dead-panned, before smirking, "but then again, I think Mr. Frenchy would kill me."

"Oh, no," came a calm voice, "Never kill. I'd just bury you alive." Arms came around Harry, whose face had long since turned red. "'Bonsoir 'Arry. 'Ow are you doing?"

"I'm fine," Harry managed to squeak out before scooting over and making room, "Ron, Hermione and Neville will be here soon, as well as Luna. In fact I'm surprised Luna isn't already here."

Luna plopped down, as though summoned, "I was helping Hermione hold her hair back. Don't worry, all is well." Her cheerful tone didn't match her eyes as she looked at Bellamy, "Possessive much Veela Bellamy Delacour?"

"Annoying much Seer child?" Bellamy batted back.

"Is there something I should know?" Harry asked

"Nothing," the two chimed as they glared at each other, "Nothing at all."

Hermione plopped down quickly as she made her way to the Hufflepuff table, along with Ron and Neville, "Why so tense guys?"

AN: I know it's been a while since I uploaded, but here it is. Please Read and Review

AAN: I'm going to start a rewrite of the series... Sorry if it's sudden but I've just had it up to my neck with the inconsistencies in my own writing.

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