Me: I will not disturb.

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Luffy stared his first mate down intensely across the kitchen table. Both had their eyes squinted angrily and wouldn't dare blink, thus losing to the other. Chopper has stood on the side of them for what seemed like forever, watching and extremely worried. He wasn't even sure if they were breathing or not, let alone blinking. The ship's cook entered the kitchen, a fresh cigarette lit and hanging dully from his mouth. Chopper ran over to him before he was even through the door and clung desperately to his right leg. Sanji was uninterested in their entire situation, but the reindeer's hooves were tightening on his skin painfully. "What's wrong with them?" he asked eventually.

"I...I don't know," Chopper answered, "They were like this when I got here. They're...not moving at all." Just then, Zoro leaned over the table, closer to the captain's set, determined face, brushing noses with him. He breathed out simply, "No."

"YEEESS," Luffy whined, flailing his rubber arms wildly. Sanji raised an eyebrow as he puffed out a large cloud of smoke. "Oi," he called, "what're you two fighting about?" The swordsman's head spun around to the cook quickly, eyes ridiculously huge. Luffy's mouth readied to blurt out the answer, but a tanned hand clamped over it. Zoro shook his head rapidly, "No, no. Nothing at all." This only encouraged Sanji to walk over to the two and pry the marimo's hand off of the boy. Zoro put up a good fight, but his hand was ripped off sooner than he was ready for.

"ZORO WON'T TELL ME HIS ROLE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP! Sanji~! Make him tell me," Luffy whined again. The blonde glanced over to his lover, who was blushing madly. That's what this was about? A smirk found its way to Sanji's straight lips. He decided to put an end to Luffy's curiosity. Sanji set his pale hand on top of Zoro's head before speaking, "What do you think his "role" is? He's a bottom, of course."

Zoro remained silent. The heat on his face was quickly spreading to the tip of his ears and he knew it. Sanji's smug look never waved or faltered. Luffy's cheeks out stretched widely as he smiled, tipping his straw hat downwards to try to hide his amused expression. Sanji glanced down at Zoro, who was frozen in what was probably embarrassment. His hand began to stroke the soft mass of green hair, "Isn't that right, Zoro?"

"Hell no," he finally said, swatting the other's hand off. He stood up from his chair and poked the blonde in the chest with his bony index finger roughly, "No, it's not because we haven't even done anything, so how could you possibly know?" That confession gained Chopper's attention immediately. His small ears perked up then bent backwards when he frowned. Sanji noticed the doctor's strange behavior once Zoro stepped out of his line of vision. "Chopper?" he called quizzically.

"It's been four months, right?" Chopper asked. Zoro confirmed it with a small nod. "You two are in your twenties. Your hormones should be raging, yet you haven't done anything at all?" Chopper clarified. Sanji shrugged his shoulders lazily. The thought of sex did come to mind a few times, but he never dwelled on it. He spent his hours cooking or resting, not trying to get in the swordsman's pants. As for Zoro, he always meditated those feelings and urges away. He never once those about how Sanji was dealing with it.

Chopper shook his tiny head faintly, tapping the edge of his hat. "No, guys," he sighed, "This won't do. Intercourse isn't as life threatening as not eating or drinking, but it is good for the body. Without it, you'll eventually become frustrated and get what's called vascocongestion, which isn't nice at all." The small doctor grew into Heavy Point, much to everyone's surprise, and grabbed Sanji by the collar of his shirt, while doing the same with the back of Zoro's kimono. Sanji's first instinct was to kick, but he ignored it for the sake of the reindeer. What was his problem of all a sudden?

Chopper carried them out of the kitchen, with Luffy following, and gently set them down in front of the storage room's. Zoro frowned out of confusion once he realized where they were. "Oi," he called suddenly, but Chopper didn't look back at him, he looked back at Sanji with an evil glint in his eye that said everything. "Doctor's orders," he stated. The cook smiled, receiving the message loud and clear.

He hovered over Zoro once their captain was out of sight, opened the door, and pushed the other inside with his body. The door closed and Sanji shoved Zoro hard against the nearby wall. The swordsman gasped at the sudden pain he felt on his back, and Sanji took the opportunity to shove his tongue in the other's hot mouth. He sucked on Zoro's tongue with brute force, earning the smallest of moans in return.

Zoro pushed on the blonde's chest, pulling him off successfully. "Wait," he breathed, "how do you know if I'm ready or not, asshole?"

"Are you?" Sanji questioned. He knew he would get total silence from his marimo; his pride getting in the way of answering. Sanji took this moment of silence to travel down the swordsman's jaw line, kissing and biting softly in random places until he reached the fully exposed, tanned neck. He let his breath linger over the sensitive skin, causing his victim to lightly whimper. His hand carefully gripped Zoro's waist, touching nothing else as the cook waited. Zoro held his breath; he was growing irritated that the blonde had stopped his actions. "Well, Zoro?" Sanji breathed, "I can't do anything if you don't give me a straight answer~."

Zoro's words were stuck in his throat. Why he was so nervous under the other's touch, he didn't know. He couldn't form proper words with the various images of what's to come flowing mercilessly through his mind. A long, hot lick snapped him out of his thoughts, followed by a low growl of impatience. "...Yeah," Zoro breathed. Sanji smirked against the sweet neck skin, biting it harshly then lapping at the bruised spot. The swordsman moaned, lips parting.

Sanji's hands snaked around to the other's firm ass, squeezing it tightly as he captured his welcoming lips again. Zoro's red slash was discarded, along with his kimono, swords, and haramaki at a break-neck pace by the blonde's skilled fingers. Zoro's face was flushed with embarrassment as Sanji's lust-filled eyes traveled down his naked body. "Oi, damn it. Why am I only-" As the words left Zoro's mouth, the cook was already shedding his suit jacket off, followed by his shirt, pants, socks, and dress shoes. The swordsman couldn't help but stare, even though they saw each other naked in the bathroom constantly. "See something you like, marimo?" Sanji purred. Zoro's eyes snapped upwards to the other's starving, blue eyes. It wasn't fair that he was the only one completely nude while the cook still had on his black boxers.

"Sit," Sanji ordered, pointing to a crate of supplies behind them. Zoro appeared too hesitant, so the cook grasped his waist and set him on top of the cold, wooden box. Zoro shivered once his skin made contact with Sanji's hands rather than the crate. The blonde couldn't wait any longer and attacked the feather-soft neck; his love bites seemed to be getting harder and wetter. Zoro unwillingly tilted his head back, breathing out heavy pants once Sanji's lips started to move ever so tortuously slow down his chest. The swordsman's perked nipples proved to be extra sensitive when Sanji's tongue ran over one. Zoro couldn't fight back the loud moan gnawing at the back of his throat. Sanji sucked and bit at it while twisting the other one slightly.

"Ah," Zoro gasped, pushing into the touch. "Eager much?" Sanji cooed, wrapping his warm hand around the other's half hardened member. The swordsman couldn't believe how badly he was reacting. His skin was on fire every time Sanji touched a specific spot. The cook stroked Zoro's cock at a fast pace, drawing wanton moans from him as he arched his back. "Sa...Sanji," he panted, loosely wrapping his arms around the other's neck.

"Wait, a minute," Sanji said, untangling himself from the two limbs. He strolled over to a certain crate and pried the lid open, digging and searching for something inside. Zoro sat on the crate, dumbfounded and pissed that he was left in such a vulnerable position. Sanji returned, holding a bottle of cooking oil in his hands. "Lie down," he demanded. Zoro slowly leaned backwards, uncertain of his awkward actions. "Leg up," the blonde casually ordered, causing the swordsman to blush furiously.

"No, damn it. That's too degra-OI!" Zoro's leg was lifted onto Sanji's shoulder and rested their, despite the swordsman's earlier protests. The cook slathered three of his long fingers in slick oil, and then brushed his index finger gently against the other's puckered entrance. Zoro paled slightly at the weird sensation, but didn't comment until Sanji pushed his finger inside the ring of muscle. "Ahn," he grunted, squirming in an attempt to make it comfortable. Sanji noticed how tense the other got, so he bent it, trying to find his prostate. Zoro arched suddenly after a few twists and angles, and dug his nails into the wooden surface underneath him. Watching the swordsman act like this; Sanji wouldn't be able to hold back much longer. He slowly pressed another finger in, feeling his marimo tighten around them. "Relax," Sanji reminded him, immediately feeling the tight space loosen.

Another finger was soon inside, and by this time, Zoro was shamelessly moving his hips downwards onto them. Sanji scissorsed and stretched the muscle until he grew tired of Zoro having all the fun. He pulled them out reluctantly, earning a disappointed whimper. Sanji smiled down at him lovingly, pulling off his boxers, throwing them, and fully coating his member in the thin oil. Zoro's eyes widened once he laid eyes on the cook's cock. That thing was going...? Now, the swordsman wasn't so sure about this. The blonde slowly forced his head passed the tight ring, stopping once he saw Zoro's pained expression. His eyes were shut excruciatingly tight as a small tear ran down his dark red, flushed cheeks, his hands were balled into fists at his sides, and his toes were probably cramped from how hard they were curled. "Oi, marimo, are you okay?" Sanji asked. Zoro nodded meekly, not daring to open a single eye. Sanji slowly thrusted further until it was all the way inside.

Zoro finally opened a clouded eye to peer at the other, whose face was engulfed in complete pleasure. Zoro smiled despite the utter pain he felt, and shook his hips as a signal to move. Sanji raised an eyebrow, "You sure?"

"Just move, curly-que," the swordsman squeaked, though he would never admit it. The cook wasn't buying his act and pulled out quickly before snapping his hips forward. Zoro's hands instantly flew over his mouth to muffle a scream of pleasure, not pain, as Sanji continued his steady pace. Zoro couldn't fight back the high-pitched moan that were practically flowing out of his mouth. The burning feeling in his stomach started to grow and bubble as Sanji gripped his waist tightly. When the cook pulled back, he aimed upward before ramming back in brutally. Zoro's scream wasn't muffled this time; its echo extremely loud in the storage room, so it was no doubt heard from outside also. Sanji continued his fast pace regardless, slamming over and over against the writhing swordsman.

Zoro was on his last legs. The jolts of pleasure repeatedly increasing in his lower back was enough to make him cry out and grasp the edge of the crate. "Sa...Sanji, I c-can't," Zoro panted, throwing his arm over his face. The blonde let go of the other's waist without ruining his pattern, and yanked the unwanted arm off, pinning above Zoro's head. "I...I wanna see," Sanji panted, thrusting more roughly. He knew his marimo was close, but he was basically on the brink. He sped up; hitting the bundle of nerves with as much strength as his hips had. Zoro tried to speak, but only incoherent babbling came out before a long, loud moan rung in both of their ears. The swordsman came on his own stomach while Sanji continued to mercilessly slam into him. Sanji came after a few thrusts, filling Zoro until he was done. He pulled out limply, crashing onto the swordsman below him and regaining his breath.

"Do...do you like being a bottom?" Sanji breathed out, nuzzling the other's sweaty neck. Zoro was still coming down from his high; his breath slowly getting under control. He wearily glanced at the cook, who was beaming up at him with a lazy smirk. Zoro sighed, "I guess."

"Good, because I love your reactions."

"But that doesn't mean you can talk about it," the swordsman growled.

"Yes, I can. I have a right, since I'm the one who caused them," Sanji stated. Zoro grimaced, but didn't comment. Replying to something like that would never make the blonde stop boasting.

~\!/\!/\!/~

The rest of the Straw Hats were quietly talking out on the Sunny's deck. The deck, being the only place far enough where nobody could hear the couples' activities, was silenced by a loud moan. Robin went still; she was the only one who actually acknowledged the sound. Nami acted as if she didn't hear it (she totally did), and everyone else were listening to yet another tall-tale of the great Captain Usopp. She smiled to herself, realizing why Chopper asked if they wanted to "hang out on the deck." The older woman thought it was nice that the doctor was thinking about the lover birds. A sudden thought protruded her mind as she glowered at nothing in general.

Why the hell didn't he hook her up with someone, too?

End

Me: There you have it; your lemon.

Mid: Review happily!