back story: this was my first ever story posted to the site back on 8/22/08 under the title 'dreams' or something. i've since deleted it, becoming embarrassed by how poorly written it had been and how it fit into every single thing i'd grown to hate about fanfiction at the time. while the idea isn't exactly new and maybe overused, i decided to rewrite it until i felt it was good enough to post again. i still feel meh about it, but hey, what can ya do. it'll always have a place in my heart as the story that got me into writing fanfiction.

i apologize if they come off as OOC. i haven't written for these guys in years. also, i'm sorry to anyone that wanted to read smut. i've not written a proper in years and honestly, i don't feel like i'd be able to.

enjoy.

Two months had passed since L decided to handcuff himself to Light.

Originally, it hadn't been his first choice in keeping the young man close, but after finding fault in everything else he conjured up, he made due with what best fit his needs. The practice, while it seemed unpractical and slightly juvenile, would have to do. L had every intention of keeping a close and constant eye on his main suspect— the only person he was certain about, at least.

L convinced himself early on that Light was to blame for the deaths. While he may have played the part of a good student, the detective knew better. He wasn't easily deceived; he knew damn well what he was doing and he'd never been incorrect. People really needed to have more faith in him.

"Ryuzaki?" Light said with a heavy sigh, his eyes trained on the monitor in front of him.

"Yes, Light?" L responded, musing over recent findings.

"Is there something else we can do? I'm bored," Light told him, diverting his gaze away from the screen and over to the man beside him. He watched as L popped a piece of hard candy into his mouth; there was no doubt that it was strawberry flavored.

"Is that all?" L asked, narrowing his eyes at the young man through his bedhead styled hair.

Light nodded in response.

"Well, if that's what Light wants, then that's what he'll get." L said as he pushed himself up from his abnormal sitting position and jumping off the chair almost effortlessly. The chains connecting them jingled with his actions.

"Come on," L ordered, tugging on the chain to get Light moving. He mused over his desire for more strawberry pie while they walked through the empty building and into the kitchen.

"Ryuzaki, how come you only eat sweets?" Light questioned, grabbing an orange off the counter. Apples lost their appeal and no longer looked appetizing thanks to Ryuk.

"Sugar is good for the brain," he told him, his tone leaving no room for argument.

Light could only shrug, wondering where he got his information from. He watched L walk around the kitchen, poking at things that he either deemed edible or not at all worth his time. Light made note that the detective skipped over everything that was good for the body, pausing only to examine things will high sugar content. L was going to die of diabetes, he thought.

"Light, I need your input." L said as he sat down beside him and pulled his knees up to his chest.

"Okay."

"Well, first off, my percentages of you being Kira are now back to under five percent," L smiled awkwardly. "I thought Light would like to know that little bit of information."

"Is that what you want input on?" Light inquired, looking over at him.

"Not at all," he started, chewing thoughtfully on a piece of pie he'd forked into his mouth seconds prior. "In fact, thanks recent discoveries brought on by the recent deaths, it is safe to say that not only criminals are being targeted. I have reason to believe that there is another motive behind the new Kira, one that different from the one."

"The old one being me," Light muttered.

"Correct."

"Well, if you want my honest opinion, I think that given the circumstances and how closely people are dying, I would guess that someone with less intelligence is doing it." Light stated, toying with a piece of orange peeling. "Because of how sporadic the killings are and the difference between the first and the second, I believe it may be a woman."

L blinked, his eyes widening at the accusation. "What makes Light say such things?"

"The number of deaths has increasingly risen from when you first suspected that I was behind the Kira moniker and the female deaths have gotten far more publicity than before— purposely done, of course —which leads me to believe that a woman is behind it." Light looked up at him, a faint blush running across the bridge of his nose as their eyes met.

"Very good," L said. He honestly hadn't expected Light to pick up on much, so to say he was surprised by Light was a definite understatement.

L placed his thumb against his bottom lip, gently biting it, content on staying within the confines of the kitchen. It had been a while since he'd left his work station. Light, on the other hand, had grown tired of sitting at the tiny island, despite the fact that he hadn't actually eaten anything— an orange hardly counts as something substantial.

"Ryuzaki, how about we go to bed? We've been doing this all day and everyone else has gone home for the night," Light said with a yawn. "I'm beat, and you could use the rest as well."

Light stood up, arching his back in well needed stretch. It felt like it had been years since he'd gotten a decent night's rest, even though the amount of sleep he got in a day was more than L got in a week. L's sleeping habits made absolutely no sense to him— not to say that anything the detective did made much sense. Light had to give him credit though, not many people could pull off functioning with little sleep. And without wanting to kill every person they came in contact with.

"Are you coming?" Light asked, pursing his lips and staring at the annoying mess of black hair.

"I have no other choice," L drawled. He carefully removed himself from the chair and allowed Light to lead the way to the room they'd been sharing since he gave the word for the teenager to be released from his voluntary prison sentence.

Light walked with a swiftness, his steps graceful; like his feet weren't even touching the floor to start with. It was like he was a ghost silently moving from one place to another. L tried to find reason in the way he walked, so it came as no surprise when he found himself watching the way Light's hips swayed almost teasingly from side to side. L's gaze diverted to the floor after "I bet he's doing that on purpose" flashed through his mind and he barely paying attention to where he was being taken.

Light felt a little resistance coming from L's end, and after turning his head to look back to see that L had slowed his pace down, he balled a small portion of the chain in his fist and pulled. The sudden jerk forced their bodies to hit. L, who was lost in thought, looked up at the back of Light's head before distancing himself from the younger male. Light arched a delicately sculpted eyebrow when no smart remark came from the detective; he was starting to become oddly curious about what was going on inside L's head. Normally he would have a word or two to say, possibly mocking his incompetence to walk or jumping into a speech on why he was the perfect suspect. It felt weird knowing that L hadn't said a word, and dare he think it, having his actions rejected made him feel worse.

"Light?" L stared at his frozen body.

"Sorry," Light said as he resumed walking towards the room.

"Are you alright?" L asked, forcing down his thoughts of this boy is beautiful and it sucks that he's behind Kira. On the outside the black haired man looked calm and collected, but inside, he was trying to fight his way through randomly occurring thoughts of the teen.

"Yeah, I'm good. I was just thinking." Light assured him, contemplating every possible reason for L being the way he was.

"Oh? About what?" L wondered out loud.

"The case," Light stated, though he honestly wanted to say you. "The transition back into the world after everything is said and done. It'll be weird."

"I see." L was smarter than Light was giving him credit for; he knew damn well that there was something wrong with him.

Light shrugged, letting L know that he heard him, as he pushed the door to the room open. For the first time that night— and after he started feeling sorry for himself —he began to drag his feet along the carpeted floor. L trailed behind him, his thoughts solely focused on finding out what was wrong with Light and why the sudden change in his demeanor. The way he was acting just didn't sit right with him.

"Ryuzaki, do think we could do without the handcuffs tonight?" Light's voice was full of chagrin. He unzipped his dress slacks, allowing them to fall to the floor before sitting down on the edge of the bed. L looked at him, despite knowing that Light had expressed on several occasions that he didn't want L watching him take his clothes off.

"Light," L began, digging through his pockets for a moment and fingering the key that was hidden in the fabric. He kept it on his person for instances like these, though he was certain that he'd never need to use it. "You asking has just placed you over five percent."

Light looked up at him, his hands resting on his knees and his brows furrowed. There was nothing shocking about hearing that— L was on the look out for anything that could and would bring him down. But, for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to care.

"I don't care, Ryuzaki. I really don't." Light muttered. "I just want to sleep without the chain for a change."

L climbed into bed next to him and leaned back against the wall, the laptop that he used at night was already waiting for him. Light sighed, knowing that he was fighting a losing battle, and he slid under the covers. The uncomfortable chain digging into his arm, as he was forced to lay on his back so that L could continue working. L followed suit, getting himself ready for the sleep he knew wouldn't come. The bed moved as L climbed under the blanket, relishing in the warmth and pulling his legs up into his normal sitting position.

"Go to sleep," L said softly, hoping to deter the conversation about unlocking the handcuffs like Light wanted him to do. "You need the rest."

"I need the rest?" You're the one that doesn't sleep!" Light nearly shouted, clearly agitated with the man.

"I don't require the same amount of sleep, Light. You know this," L told him, yearning to add duh to the end of his statement like a teenage girl trying to make her point.

Light rolled his eyes, trying to get as comfortable as possible. He was tired of hearing the same old nonsense spew from L's mouth. There was always a reason for what he did and almost all of it was ludicrous.

L momentarily watched Light as he finally allowed sleep to take him. His breathing evened out, he stopped squirming, and he looked much younger— more innocent —than he did during the day. He figured that the investigation was starting to take a toll on him, if the way he'd been acting was anything to go by. The detective couldn't blame him for being tired.

Only, he wasn't just tired. And... it wasn't just the case.

L typed away at his laptop, listening to soft whirl of the ceiling fan. Thoughts of the case zoomed through his mind, lacing with curious muses about Light, and uncharacteristic things he'd like to do with the young man. Those thoughts weren't normal, he knew, but he couldn't help it. The way Light was— his looks and the level of his intelligence —were far different from anything else he had encountered during his stay in Japan.

Light's hair color wasn't normal, but he couldn't for sure say that it had been dyed. L liked to think that wasn't the case. His appearance— his looks —were to die for. L would be lying to himself if he thought that his suspect was unattractive. He often wondered if the way he looked extended to every aspect of his body. And, if that were true, would he get to try it out?

His level of intelligence nearly rivaled that of his own, which was a great feat in and of itself. There were many people back home trying to fight for his title, trying to be as smart as he was, trying to one up the genius under him. However, they could barely compare to what lie in bed next to him. Light was truly a magnificent example of the human race— L just wished that he didn't have the title of Kira hanging over his head.

Taking a break from his work, he peered down at the sleeping form nestled in the covers and watched the blanket rise and fall with his shallow breathing. Silently he studied Light as if he were on display, and again, he marveled at his beauty. He was tempted to reach over and touch his face— just a quick touch of his cheek and nothing more. It wasn't something he'd normally do (or think) during the day when he was awake, but in the dead of night when Light was sleep, the urges came naturally and they were much easier to deal with.

"Ryuzaki..." Light murmured, stirring beside him. L continued to watch him through the hair that had fallen in front of his face, eyes wide. When he failed to make another sound or indication that he was waking up, L decided that his short break was over and he turned back to his laptop.

A couple minutes passed before Light's movements began to increase, the cuffed hand patting the bed, almost as if he were searching for something. For what, L wondered as he stopped typing in the middle of his sentence to watch the younger male with interest. If it had been anyone else— namely one of the kids from the orphanage —it would've been a bit comical.

"... 'zaki, no!" Light cried out, his face scrunching up.

No? What was going on inside his dream?

Paying close attention to his slumbering suspect, he placed the laptop on the end of the bed before leaning over Light for further inspection. He took note of the tears that were running down his face, dampening the pillow beneath his head. This was a first— Light had never reacted to his dreams in such a manner before.

Gently he pressed the palm of his hand to Light's cheek (after getting over the idea of not touching him). He hoped that the touch would help calm him down or keep him from thrashing about on the bed. L wanted to comfort him, wake him up and tell him that it was a dream, but he didn't know how— he didn't know how to properly comfort somebody, as he, himself, had never been comforted. Light finally slowed his movement, his breathing no longer frantic. L took it as a victory, as a sign that he'd succeeded in his weak attempts to comfort.

An incomprehensible slur of words fell from Light's lips. L chuckled lightly, throwing all inhibitions into the window as he leaned down farther and ever-so lightly pressed his pale lips to Light's cheek. It was short, barely there, and it sent something through him that he'd never felt before. L wasn't sure what to make of it, so he shrugged it off, picked up his laptop and for a second time attempted to go back to working on the investigation.

However, he was unable to concentrate. And, after sitting there staring at the screen for what felt like eternity, he put his index finger to his mouth, watching Light from the corner of his eyes.

"Again," Light purred, rolling onto his side to face L.

"What?" L asked, blinking.

"Do that again... felt nice," he mumbled and cracked his eyes open, hoping that the dark haired man would grasp the context of what he was trying to say.

Without saying another word or thinking anything, L nodded and leaned down once again to swipe his lips across Light's cheek. Light sleepily looked up at him, their faces only inches apart, and smiled softly. The same feeling from earlier resonated through his entire being. They watched one another, careful not to move and lose the moment. It took a second for Light's eyes to adjust to the darkness of the room, but when they did, he felt taken aback at how close L really was and how, with the glow of the laptop, L looked nearly angelic.

Without hesitation, he slipped the cuffed hand out from under the blanket and loosely grasped L's wrist. He brought it up to his face, his breath ghosting over the pallid skin before he looked up, almost as if he were asking for approval. When L didn't do anything, he softly pressed a kiss to the inside of his wrist, mindful of the chain connecting them together.

L shivered, pulling away from Light. Nothing was supposed to happen between them; they weren't supposed to breach their relationship of detective and suspect.

L had never felt like that before. He'd never felt his heart leap into his throat, or the figurative butterflies fluttering around in his stomach. He'd never bothered to deal with that side of himself, always deciding that work was better than play. Honestly, L had no idea what to do. Was he supposed to let Light touch him in such an intimate way? Was he supposed to do it back? Or... what he thinking too much about it?

He didn't know.

What he did know, however, was that Light was probably more experienced than he was. He assumed that Light had been with Misa enough to know what to do. At least, he had his hopes.

"Light?"

"Yeah," Light whispered, reaching out, his fingers playing L's like piano keys. It didn't take him long before he laced their fingers together, immediately taking the chill away from L's hand.

"Don't... Light," the older male said. "I can't. We can't."

"Why?" Light asked, rejection evident in his voice.

L couldn't answer him; didn't know how to. He wanted it just as much as Light did, but he knew it would be a bad idea. No, a horrible one. It would be more dangerous than playing a game of cat and mouse with Kira. In the end, at least.

"Nothing?" Light questioned when L failed to answer him.

Light, like before, brought L's hand back to his face, but this time he gingerly placed his lips atop the back of his hand. Slowly and deliberately, he planted a trail of wet kisses up his arm, stopping at the edge of the white t-shirt barring L's shoulder from his wandering mouth.

"That feels good." L managed to whisper.

"Yeah?" Light groaned in his ear before his lips met the side of L's neck, sucking and nibbling softly on the flesh of his new-found lover.

"Nn," L moaned quietly. The noise was foreign to his ears and for a moment he had to figure out who it came from. When the realization that the sound came from his mouth hit him, his eyes shot open and he tried to stare down at the boy kissing him. Light took note of the way he tensed and he reluctantly pulled away from the junction between his neck and shoulder with an audible pop.

"Is something wrong, Ryuzaki?" Light asked, lifting his head so that they were face to face, and he questioned himself on why he'd never really bothered to pay attention to how stunning L was.

"Light," he started. "This isn't..."

He was mid-sentence when Light hushed him with a kiss. It only lasted a few seconds, and it wasn't nearly as amazing as he'd thought it would be, but it did help him realize that he didn't care about what was right or wrong, or what was expected of him. All he knew was that he wanted more— he wanted Light and he would do anything to obtain him.

"You taste like strawberries," Light said as he pulled back, his eyes full of mirth.

"Is that so?"

"Mhm."

Light's lips found his for a second time. He playfully nibbled his bottom lip, sending a rush of satisfaction through L's body. A moan escaped L's mouth, and Light deepened the kiss. Their tongues danced, one wet appendage sliding across the other as Light moved himself so that he was seated in L's lap, his hands resting on the man's slim hips. As a response to the sudden change, L pulled away, lightly biting Light's lip.

"Ryuzaki," Light whined at the loss of contact.

"Yes, Light?"

"More," he demanded.

L watched Light watch him, his eyes swimming with lust and something entirely unknown to him. Light wanted more? He'd give him more— or at least, give him all that he could with what little knowledge he had. But, first things first, he had to put his spare key to good use.

"Thank you," Light said when he felt the handcuff fall from his wrist.

"Mhm," L moaned as he changed their position by flipping Light over so that he could straddle him.

He pressed his lips against Light's neck, nipping, sucking, kissing, and leaving a trail of saliva along his skin. L could feel Light's hold on him loosen as he moved downwards, kissing the exposed skin around the edge of his shirt. Light quietly begged for more.

Light's shirt was the first thing to go, followed by the remainder of their obstructing clothing.

Their bodies collided, sliding against one another in a fit of passion and pleasure. L wrapped his arms around Light, his nails digging into his back as Light thrust into him, a moan slipping from his open mouth and filling the room with a sense of unadulterated urgency.

Light's hands roamed over his body, fingers trickling down his sides and L arched into his touch. Their hearts beat in time with one another and their lips crashed, both savoring the other and wanting more. L wrapped his legs around Light's waist, pushing him deeper into his body and letting his head fall back against the bed, a breathless moan falling from his mouth.

L was the first to come to completion, his nails leaving angry lines on Light's back as he shuddered. Light continued until he reached his orgasm, hips jerking as he rode it out with a guttural moan. When he came to a stop, he didn't bother to slide out, instead opting to just collapse on L's chest, breathing heavily.

They didn't move. They lie there, enjoying the silence and post orgasm high, thinking over what they'd done and the risks involved. It was mostly L thinking, but he was sure that it crossed Light's mind at some point when he could finally process a thought and pull out to lay down beside the detective.

They couldn't say how much time passed before L decided to move, placing a leg on either side of Light's body and his mouth meeting the younger man's sweat riddled neck for a quick kiss. Slowly his lips ghosted over his chin, traced along his jaw, and stopped at his ear.

"Thank you," L whispered.

"Mm, anytime." Light said, turning his head and engaging the detective in a lazy kiss.

L had never known anything to be as wonderful— as exciting, as pleasurable —as what he'd done with Light. It wouldn't be the last time they joined together in such an act, he would make sure of that. Even if Light ended up being Kira, he would go through hell to get to him. Hell, he'd name someone else just for the sake of keeping Light with him at all times.

Anything, as long as he could continue to feel the way Light made him.

It was then, as he nuzzled the crook of Light's neck and listened to his heart, that he came to a startling realization.

For the first time in his life, L found something he wanted more than sugar— more than sweets or strawberries or justice —and he would do everything in his power to keep it.

yes? no? lemme know!

review, please. thank you.
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