"I can't believe you're moving in with Monica."
Chandler shrugged. "Well, we've been dating for a while now. It was just a matter of time."
Joey nodded, and sighed. "I know. It's just… sad."
Monica was going on a cooking tour. She would be away for a whole week. Chandler would miss her, but it was perfect timing; by the time she returned, he would have moved all of his stuff into her place, and they would be ready to start their life together.
Joey wanted to be happy for Monica and Chandler, he really did. He just couldn't. Before, when people had thought Joey, they would think Chandler, and vice versa. But now, when people thought Chandler, they thought… Monica.
Joey knew he had to do something. Chandler wouldn't just come and fall into his arms. If he wanted him, Joey would have to make it happen himself.
But how? He was the simple one. The dumb one. The one that people sighed at and shook their heads. Maybe Chandler deserved better than him.
Distraught, he went to Phoebe. She had always been one of his closest friends- he felt that he could tell her anything.
So he spilled everything.
"Phoebe, you've gotta help me. I'm in love with Chandler."
The blonde laughed. "I know."
Joey was stunned. "You do? How?"
"Because I'm psychic, remember?" Phoebe flashed a grin. "Anyway. I'm gonna help you get him."
"You are?" Joey's grin reflected hers perfectly. "Thanks, Phoebs… I owe you one."
"Don't thank the puppet master." Phoebe replied sagely. "…Although that may help you later on." She winked at him.
They concocted two plans. Plan A was where Monica was abducted by aliens, and when Joey swept in to console Chandler, he would fall in love with Joey.
"I like it." said Joey matter-of-factly. "But there's one problem. No self-respecting alien would abduct Monica. She's too uptight."
Phoebe nodded slowly. "Hmm… you're right." She sighed and scratched out Alien abduction on the sheet of paper in front of her. "What about just telling him how you feel?"
"Huh." Joey looked thoughtful, contemplating this. It was so simple… like him. "That sounds easy, Phoebs, I guess I could do that."
"Sure you can." Phoebe said, smiling. "Ooh, this is a great Plan B! I like this!"
When Joey went home that afternoon, Chandler was right where Joey knew he'd be; packing boxes and humming songs from some obscure musical under his breath.
"Hey, dude." Joey said, making his presence known.
Chandler turned around. "Oh, hi, Joe." He put down the box he was carrying and smiled.
"Listen… Can I talk to you about something?" Joey asked.
"Okay." Chandler plopped himself down on the box and looked up expectantly at his roommate.
Joey swallowed hard. Before, when he had been talking to Phoebe, it had seemed so easy. Just… 'I just wanted to say that I really like you.' Or… not. Maybe, 'Have you ever considered a same-sex relationship?' No. Definitely no. That one was almost laughable.
It had to be simple. Easy. Something that, if he started to say, he couldn't quickly change to something else. Something like…
"I love you, Chandler."
Chandler stared at Joey uncomprehendingly. Joey looked down at his feet, face burning. Even if his frozen mind could spit out any more words to say, his mouth wasn't cooperating. The actor just stood there, unmoving, unspeaking.
It felt like hours went by, although it was just mere moments, dragging on painfully. Joey waited for Chandler to speak, and Chandler waited for himself to speak, too. But his mouth felt leaden.
Finally, the silence was broken by Joey. "I'm sorry." he said. "I was… I was way out of line. Just forget I ever said that, okay?"
"How could I forget that?" Chandler choked out. "Joey, are you really… in love with me…?"
"Yes!" Joey exclaimed. "Yes, I am! Please don't move in with Monica, I… I can't live without you."
"Joey…" Chandler got off of the box and approached Joey. "You are not going to live without me. I'll be right across the hall."
"I know, but… you and Monica will, y'know, get married… have kids… move off to some big house… And you'll forget all about me." Joey began. However, once he had started, he couldn't stop. "But I'll never forget about you, Chandler… because you're the love of my life, and-"
"Do you remember the New Years of '94?" blurted out Chandler.
Joey stopped his hopeless rant and blinked at his roommate, confused. "Um… yeah?"
"Do you remember when you kissed me?" continued Chandler, voice wavering.
Joey nodded slowly. "Yeah…"
"I bet you didn't know that after that, I had a little crush on you." Chandler said. "Oh, who am I kidding? I loved you, Joey. I don't… I don't know why I never told you. You were just such a… a womanizer. I felt like I had no chance."
"Chandler-"
"Maybe if I had told you then, we wouldn't be in this mess now." Chandler finished. He sounded rueful, and maybe even a little guilty.
Joey couldn't help himself from grinning. "Well, if both of us feel this way… why don't we do something about it?"
But Chandler frowned, shaking his head. "I'm moving in with Monica now, Joe. I'm sorry."
Joey turned away. He felt hurt. Maybe things would've been better if he hadn't spoken at all.
"We're still best friends." Chandler reminded Joey.
The actor nodded. "I know that, Chandler. It's just… sad."
end