This night was strange. I never felt like this before, but somehow it's not that bad. I watch my friends walking in front of me. Nagisa, still so bright, jumping and laughing. He links his arm with Rei, who seems to be really embarrassed, but doesn't move an inch. I feel a little smile spreading across my face. Tonight I can't help it. I am happy. It's like a heavy burden was lifted from my soul. I finally realized what I always wanted.
But... there's still a black spot on my heart. I will never swim with him again. The person, who showed me that sight, I've never seen before. Who taught me, that there is more to swimming than what I thought. I feel the darkness reach out to me with its long merciless claws.
"Haru!"
And there he is Makoto. Looking at me with this gentle smile of his. I don't understand why, but when I see this face all my worries and fears become insignificant. He always cares for me and even now he noticed that I was lost in thought. I speed up, as I see the others waiting for me.
Nagisas eyes are glittering and he takes my hands in his.
"Haru-chan! I'm looking forward to practice with you! If we swim together, we will surely win!"
I nod in silence. This situation is still a little bit uncomfortable. But I really want to be with them.
Rei stands behind Nagisa, pushing up his glasses. "I feel honored to be able to swim with you again, Haruka-senpai." I see his cheeks turning red. Rei is really weird, but I like him just as much as Nagisa, who as been my childhood friend for years.
"Me, too."
My plain answer is enough to make those two look at each other in joy and wave enthusiastic as we part ways.
I almost chuckled at this sight.
"Haru. Let's go."
There it is again, this smile, which I cannot resist. I close up to him, and we walk silently. You can still hear the sounds of the festival and Japanese lanterns cover the street in a reddish light. The bag in Makotos hands catch my eyes. The water is reflecting the light and Makoto holds it carefully in his hands. A soft breeze brushes my hair and I feel at ease.

We reach Makotos house and somehow I can tell, that Makoto is restless.
"Haru! I just want to put the fishes in the water, but I still want to walk you home."
I look straight into his eyes and I see a familiar brilliance in it. I just nod in silence and his face brightens up. "I'll be right back!", and with this he disappears into the house.
I don't know why he wants to do that, but I am still not able to part with him at this point. I want to be with him some more. I sit down on the stairs, playing with a blade of grass.
It's strange. I never intended to convey my feelings, but when I'm with Makoto... Something in his presence puts me at ease. When I look into these green eyes, I can't help put feel secure. A warm feeling bubbles up in my chest. I want to see him.
"Haru."
My heart skips a beat, when I hear his voice, calling out for me.
I can tell that he really hurried, because he is a little out of breath. Why is my hear pounding this fast?
I walk down to him and without another word, we go to my house. I open the door and get inside. I already now, that Makoto wants to stay longer, so I don't intend to say goodbye at the front door.
I hear him close the door behind him and before I can move any further, I feel myself wrapped in big strong arms.
Makoto is hugging me, pressing me tight against his chest. He buries his face against my neck.

"I'm sorry Haru! But...", he pauses, clenching his arms around me even tighter. "I wanted to do this so badly. I- when you said, that you want to swim with everybody. I- I was so very happy." My eyes widen as I hear his trembling voice. "Really, I think I've never been this happy in my life." He laughs, but I can still tell, that he's about to cry.
My heart is racing and Makotos words somehow hurt. But in a good way. I instinctively try to clench my chest, but there is a warm arm wrapped around my body.
I am a little bit nervous, but I still touch him. I caress his skin and I can feel him shiver at my touch.
I take his hands, to loosen his grip and turn around to face him.
His eyes are red and he looks like a picture of misery. Really this tall, muscular guy is standing in front of me almost crying.
I move closer and lay a hand on his face. Makoto closes his eyes and leans into my touch.
The insides of my stomach feel hot and tingly. Makoto looks at me and I see his eyes shine, when a small chuckle escapes my lips.
"Makoto, isn't that a reason to smile?"
He stares at me in confusion, but somehow his expression softens.
"Yes.", he whispers and the gentle smile is back on his lips.

I though I didn't have a reason to swim, but the thought of swimming with my friends warms me up from the inside.

I don't know, if I will every be able to overcome my feelings towards Rin, but there is one thing for sure.
While swimming with my friends, I finally felt free for the first time.
I want to swim with them. I want us to be together.
I want to be with Makoto.
He wipes his eyes and tries to calm down.
Really, getting so worked up for my sake. I can't keep up with all the affection, building up inside of me. My heart is racing like crazy.
Makoto.
I stand on my toes and lay my lips on his.
I don't close my eyes and I see Makotos overwhelmed face. It's a tender innocent kiss. Just a mere brush, but Makoto blushes in a deep red. Somehow it feels natural doing this with him.
"Makoto, I'm very happy."
And I truly am. I'm happy, because of my friends, because I finally realized my true feelings, and I am happy to be by his side.
Makoto stares at me for a split second but finally his composure crumbles away. "Haru!", he starts crying like a little kid and pulls me back into his arms. I smile as I lay my hands on his back, caressing his broad shoulders.
I want to stay like this forever.