S H A D E

I'm livin' in yer shadow, big bro

And I hate it.

Always bein' compared ta ya

Always bein' judged.

"You're so irresponsible, Raph"

"Why can't you be more like Leo?"

"You are such a hothead!"

"Raphael!"

Can't I jus' be me?

I used ta be jealous

Maybe a part a me still is

Of the power you hold as leader.

But the burden that comes with it?

Yeah, I'll take a pass on that.

I've felt tha weight b'fore

A tiny li'l taste of those hard decisions.

No thanks, don't want it

That part you can keep, bruv

Yet I still try an' take charge

Rushin' inta a fight without a second thought

Even with ya tellin' me ta wait

I jump right in

An' Mike got hurt 'cause a it.

But it wasn't his face that I watched tonight

It was yers

Mike wasn't bad off, 'cordin' to Don

Looked worse than it was

Didn't stop you from worryin' though.

I don't mean ta make yer job harder,

Well, okay, sometimes I do.

But you don't even blame me fer this, do ya?

Prol'y blame yerself like usual, some how

I got us inta that mess, bro

Yer the one tha' got us out

Even one turtle down, you somehow managed it

All Don an' I had ta do was follow

Don't know why that's so hard fer me to do most a da time

But here I am now

Punching out my frustrations on my favorite punchin' bag

Mosta that frustration bein' self-induced

And I see ya walkin' ova to me

And I'm thinkin' I'm in fa the lecture of tha freakin' year

But you just step up in fronta me

With that 'Fearless Leader' look on yer face

The one tha' says 'I've made a decision'

And when ya start talkin', yer voice has that ever-present authority

But yer tone is more 'request and discuss' than an order

"Raph, I need to talk to you."

With all these thoughts still runnin' 'round my head

I make an effort

"Yeah?"

"I want to make you second in command. Officially."

Didn't see that comin'

"If you feel there is a flaw in one of my plans, or you have a plan that you feel is better, bring it up. I want us to discuss it, not argue."

Ya go inta detail, explainin' what ya mean

"I think this is best for the family, as well as for you and me."

When I agree, I see you relax

You know I always got yer back

And I don't know how ya did it, bro

But ya gave me almost all the power a leader could have

But with almost none of the burden

And all a the freedom I had b'fore

'Cause I know yer still there with a plan

When I go rushin' in

But now I'm actually gonna think 'afore I leap

And listen 'fore I argue

'Cause I know you always got my back too

Heh. Guess livin' in yer shadow

Ain't so bad after all.

Perfectus

Disclaimer: I don't own anything relating to TMNT, but it would be awesome if I did. At least, I think it would be. Heh.

Author's Notes: Wow. My first completed Raphael first-person piece. Did I completely butcher his accent? It was odd writing this way, but I kind of like it. Not sure where the prose format came from, but again, I like it. I guess the real question is: do you guys like it? The story as a whole, I mean, not. . . Oh, you people are smart, you know what I meant. xD Drop me a line, peeps, if ya want to.

Sorry, Nino, guess this doesn't really count as 'fluff' but neither would I call it 'angst' so that's a plus. Guess I wasn't in a fluffy enough mood for it. xD Sorry!

-TheOneThatGotAway99