I do not own the Despicable Me franchise.

For this story, the minions speak their words backwards. For example, review is weiver.

Down for the Count

The ocean they were currently stranded in wasn't by any means warm, but it also wasn't cold enough to make their bones stiff and lips blue. But the temperature of the water and the possibility of drowning weren't at the forefront of Gru's mind at the moment. He was too busy being thankful that he and Lucy were alive and he was content to hold her until his minions came back with their little wooden boat.

"You know, I think this has actually been the best day of my life."

Lucy's thoughtful voice interrupted his silent gazing. Gru arched an eyebrow in amusement. "Oh really?"

The redhead glanced at the vast water surrounding them and then at the volcano that was currently gushing lava in the distance. "Totally! I mean, I got to witness an epic fight, see the defeat of the legendary villain El Macho and be rescued by the man of my dreams. Hands down, best day ever."

It took a moment for Gru to process man of my dreams and when he did his legs stopped pumping from surprise. He plummeted below the water's surface and he hastily started kicking his legs again. Gru spluttered for a moment, spitting the water out of his mouth. "De man of your dreams?" he repeated.

"Well, perhaps not the exact man of my dreams," Lucy corrected. "I don't think anyone really imagines themselves being with an ex-villain who has an army of adorable yellow munchkins. But that's what makes you so awesome!"

Gru rolled his eyes in mock-hurt. "So eet ees de minions who won yoo over, huh?"

"They are irresistible," Lucy teased.

"Dave will be happy to hear dat," Gru muttered under his breath.

"Echo! Echo! Echo!"

The two glanced up to see the boat coming back. Gru wrapped an arm around Lucy's waist and swam to meet the minions. He grabbed hold of the edge and helped Lucy inside before climbing in himself. He was greeted with three cheers and a leg-hug.

"Yes, yes, I am fine," he assured them, patting their heads affectionately. "Lucy, dis ees Tim, Phil and Jerry."

"Bello!" they greeted cheerfully and, to Gru's embarrassment, latched onto Lucy's leg in a hug as well.

"Sorry about dis," he muttered. "Dey're very affectionate creatures-"

He needn't have worried, as Lucy immediately bent down and wrapped the three minions in a hug. "They really are the cutest things on the face of the Earth." She paused for a moment before quickly adding, "Besides you and the girls, of course."

"Sure, sure." Gru snorted and leaned against the back of the boat. He was wet, tired and just wanted to go home. "Back to shore, boys."

Tim grabbed the oars and Jerry climbed onto Phil's head, the megaphone hovering inches from his lips. "Echo! Ech-"

"No, no!" Gru snatched the megaphone and threw it into the water. "No echo! Just row!"

Jerry pouted and Tim started pumping his little arms, humming a soft song under his breath. The sudden jolt of the boat caused Lucy to topple into Gru's lap. "Oops! Sorry, I've never really gotten the hang of sea legs."

"Eet ees alright," he assured her. "Een fact, I don't mind at all."

...

It took the better part of an hour to get back to El Macho's base. When they got there they were greeted by three very worried and anxious little girls.

Gru climbed from the boat and reached the stone-walled courtyard. Agnes promptly burst into happy tears at the sight of him and threw herself into his arms. Gru hoisted her into the air and bounced her gently. "Ssh, don't cry. I'm fine, see? All fingers and toes attached."

Edith wiped the tears off of her cheeks and wrapped her arms around his leg. "That was cool," she mumbled into the black fabric of his pants. "The way you saved Miss Lucy and escaped death from a rocket tied with dynamite and a shark."

"Eet wasn't cool at de time, but eet ees now," Gru joked lightly, playing with the strands of blonde hair that poked out of Edith's beloved pink beanie.

Margo grabbed hold of his hand, catching his attention. Her brown eyes were filled with tears. "I was so afraid," she whispered, the words almost being smothered by a sob. "I was afraid we'd lose you and that...and that..."

Gru bent down and engulfed all three into a tight embrace. "I promised I wouldn't ever leave yoo again," he said softly. "And I won't."

Margo buried her face in his jacket, her sobs coming loose and her small body shaking. Gru rubbed her back soothingly and took a moment to be thankful that everyone he cared about came out of the battle safely.

Lucy watched the reunion with a lump in her throat. It was so sweet and endearing to see Gru nearly smothered by three young girls. A sudden pang entered her chest, and it surprised her when she realized that it was longing-a longing to be a part of the most unique and loving family she had ever seen.

"Miss Lucy?"

The redhead glanced down to see the youngest had broken free of her father and wandered over to her. The raven-haired girl shuffled her feet and peered up shyly. "I'm glad you're okay too." She extended her arms hesitantly, as if afraid her gesture would be rejected.

"Aw, thanks, sweetie!" Lucy bent down and took the little girl into her arms. The simple embrace filled her heart with warmth and happiness.

Agnes stepped back after a moment and wiped the lingering tears off of her face. She peered around the compound and looked up at her adoptive father with a worried expression. "Gru?"

"Yes, keeten?" Gru studied her intently. "Ees somet'ing wrong? Did yoo get hurt?"

"No, but the cousins did."

Gru followed her pointed finger and noticed for the first time that the vast majority of his minions were still lying on the ground, limp and unmoving. Those who had managed to muster up enough energy to attack the mutated El Macho with jelly-guns were trying their best to get the others to their feet.

"Can minions die?" Edith asked in a whisper, her eyes expressing fear at what the answer may be.

Gru truly did not know how to answer that question. When under the influence of the mutagen, they were indestructible. And while they were certainly durable without it, there had never been a situation dire enough to see if minions had an end to their lives.

"I don't know," he finally answered. "As yoo know, de minions have been alive since de beginning of time. I am sure eet will take more den a formula to finish dem off."

"Gru, old boy! You gave us quite a scare!" Dr. Nefario came up behind Gru and clapped him on the back.

"De scare ees not over yet," Gru muttered to the elderly man. "De minions don't look so good."

"It's the after effects of the mutagen," Dr. Nefario explained. "The ingredients inside corrupted their original DNA so much that it's going to take their systems a while to get back into shape."

Relief coursed through Gru. "Dat's good. But...how are we goeeng to get all of dem back home?"

"Multiple trips." Dr. Nefario shrugged. "And I mean multiple trips."

Gru sighed heavily and processed this. "Alright. Lucy, give Ramsbottom a call."

"Got it." Lucy whipped out her cellphone, which was remarkably dry. Gru, who had meant that Lucy should hijack El Macho's phone, stared in disbelief. "Latest in A.V.L technology," she explained. "Waterproof cellphone."

Margo could not help but stare in awe. "I could use one of those."

"No yoo couldn't!" Gru said sharply. "The rest of us will be een charge of letteeng de minions loose from de cages."

"Let's move people!" Edith barked, racing as fast as her little legs could carry her to the nearest cage. Margo scooped up Agnes and followed after the blonde cannonball. Dr. Nefario rounded up the minions he had brought with him and set off for the cages on the right side of the compound.

"Silas is on his way with the troops," Lucy informed, snapping her cellphone shut. "He also said that Floyd Eagle-san will be released from custody immediately and all charges will be dropped."

"I don't suppose an apology was een dere?" Gru asked, a tinge of annoyance to his voice.

Lucy smiled apologetically. "Silas isn't the apologizing type of person. But I am sorry, for not believing you right away about Eduardo being El Macho."

Gru could hear the guilt in her voice. He rested a hand on her shoulder and gave a soft smile. "To be fair, dose furst accusations were made mostly because I didn't want his son dateeng my daughter. I should have made more of an effort to get evidence to prove dat I was correct."

"Oh, Antonio!" Lucy exclaimed, the boy having completely fled her mind. "Where is he? What are we going to do about him? He's going to be an orphan now!"

Gru rubbed his forehead with a sigh. While he didn't like the boy one little bit, throwing a child into an orphanage was not something he wanted to do. "One t'ing at a time. Antonio eesn't here right now, so he'll have to be dealt weeth later."

Lucy nodded. "Right. Minions first. Antonio can wait."

The redhead then scurried off to help the girls escort the dazed, weak minions from the metal entrapments. She completely accepted that his thousands of minions took priority over a little boy whose father would be thrown in jail, leaving him alone.

Yes, there was no doubt about it. Lucy Wilde was one heck of a woman-and the perfect woman for him.

So this will be a short story, probably only five chapters, on the aftermath of the El Macho battle. I apologize if Gru's accent is off or if it's too much. I don't do accents well.