Author's Note: Wow, so who saw that twist coming in last night's episode? Certainly not me! Well, that's all I have to say about that since it is not of importance in regards to this story. There is a lot of dialogue in this chapter, sorry if that's not your thing. But it's probably about time that Emma and Regina start talking to each other more. I hope you all enjoy this chapter and as always thank you all SO much for the support, reviews, follows, and favorites. You're the best!

Oh, and I don't own anything Once Upon A Time related.

Chapter Fourteen: Filed Under 'R'

"Daniel was," Regina breathed, grasping at the necklace around her neck and turning to face the floored blonde, "My first and only love."

Feigning a smile - grimacing on the inside - Regina lowered herself to the floor next to Emma. The defeated action performed by the Mayor was not lost on the Sheriff. Though instead of pressing her luck, she merely nodded her head and turned her attention towards the ground.

A war raged on in the mind of Emma Swan. First of all, Regina was in love? Why the hell did that sound like something out of the twilight zone? Oh, right, probably because she came off as an acerbic control freak for the most part. The news that Regina had loved - was capable of loving - needed to be chewed on thoroughly like a piece of beef jerky before it could be digested.

Though that piece of information shouldn't really had come as a surprise. Regina was a god damn human after all. Of course she was capable of love. Why Emma had thought that she was unable to accomplish such a task was beyond her level of thinking at the moment. Clearly that was something to ponder upon at a later time. Much later. Much, much later when she could think clearly and wasn't swimming in a poison that threatened her very sanity.

Okay, but that aside, there was something more which unnerved the normally stoic Sheriff. She could only assume that it was the significant similarities between the scenario she had witnessed while sleeping and the beginning of the real story Regina began to tell. Part of her, a very large part, wanted more than anything else to hear this story through. But that little seed of fear planted somewhere in her cerebrum begged her not to press the issue anymore because she wasn't sure she could handle the reality that Regina was ready to bestow upon her.

Well best make up your damn mind. Want to know the truth or not?

Emma had to hide a snicker as her damning subconscious chastised her inability to make decisions. But Emma bit the bullet. After all, how bad could it possibly be?

"What happened?" Emma asked bluntly, not wanting to beat around the bush. Not when Regina was so vulnerable. It was nerve wracking to see the brunette in such a way; sitting with her back against the wall in the hallway of her home, with her eyes focused on some distant ghost of the past.

Emma wanted to know. She needed to know. But more importantly, she didn't want Regina's walls to suddenly come up again. She wanted - no needed - Regina to know that whatever happened in the past, no matter how horrible, she had a...friend. Or whatever word you would use to describe their turbulent association with one another.

A deep breath was drawn between saccharine lips and Regina looked down, unwilling to fix her eyes on the woman who was acting as a companion at her side.

"He...was murdered," Regina's response was clipped.

Not exactly sure what to do in that moment, Emma did what came naturally. She placed a hand over Regina's and gave it a gentle squeeze and prepared herself to be physically and or verbally assaulted by the brunette. But as seconds ticked by, neither a physical nor a verbal assault came. The blonde physical relaxed against the wall and exhaled a breath she didn't even know she had been holding hostage in her lungs.

Regina instinctively wanted to remove her hand from underneath the Sheriff's but after swallowing her irritation at the affectionate gesture, she remained still. Loathe as she was to speak about Daniel, especially with the tears threatening to spill from her eyes, the brunette couldn't deny the comfort she felt when Emma placed a reassuring hand on hers.

Just once, Regina reasoned to herself. Just once she would allow herself to feel comfort. Hell, after all, the Sheriff probably wouldn't even remember it. And if she did, Regina was sure she could easily convince the blonde that she had imagined it. So for once in her long life of loneliness and despair, Regina allowed her wounded soul to indulge in the consolation that was being offered.

"What happened?" Emma asked, turning her head to look at the wistful woman at her side.

One look at the tortured woman had a lump forming in Emma's throat as she noticed the pain etched on Regina's face. The past truly is a bitch.

"You seem to enjoy furthering my point that you try to ignore what's in front on your face, Miss Swan," Regina deadpanned.

Her retort meant to sting but was nothing more than an affectation of acidity.

"Your mother." It was a statement more so than a question. And Regina just nodded her head, for the first time looking at Emma since she had sat down next to her.

And what Emma saw in that moment practically put her heart through a shredder. Sadness, actual sadness swimming in those beautiful brown eyes. It was enough to make her want to throw her arms around the woman and just squeeze her as she cried away the pain.

"My mother...she was a wretched woman," Regina finally spoke, moving her hand away from Emma's to dab at the corners of her eyes before more tears could fall. "She murdered him right before my eyes and, and," the brunette sniffled, "do you want to know the worst part?"

Emma raised her eyebrows, giving her an encouraging look.

"She said...that it was for my own good. She said that love is weakness," Regina sobbed gently as she recalled the memory of that fateful night.

"She's wrong, you know?"

Deja vu?

The blonde didn't allow Regina to question her. "Love...it's like a drug. I mean, it makes you do crazy things, things you never thought you would do. But it's kinda like, I dunno, without love you'd never take those chances. And the outcomes of those chances make you who you are…"

Regina scoffed.

"You are quite the dreadful motivational speaker."

"Yeah, maybe," Emma admitted with a chuckle, "I've never had much practice in that department."

You seem fairly close with Miss Lucas, surely you've had similar conversations with her?" Regina asked.

"Vodka did all the work," Emma admitted.

"Not even when Miss Blanchard was crying for the better part of a week over that idiot Nolan?"

"Vodka….and a few smutty romance novels."

"Disgusting"

"Yup."

Both women cringed; Emma at the remembrance of the way Mary Margaret's eyes bulged as she read some of the risque passages in the book and Regina at the mere thought of the saintly woman even having the knowledge of anything sexual.

"But seriously, I really don't do heart-to-hearts with anyone," Emma said, hoisting herself from the floor, using the wall as leverage because at some point, her left leg had fallen asleep without her notice. "Well, I guess except for with you apparently."

Regardless of the irritating and slightly painful pins and needles feeling in her leg, Emma extended a hand to the Mayor, which much to her surprise was accepted.

"And why is that?" Regina inquired, placing her hand tentatively in Emma's as if she half expected the blonde to withdraw her hand and belt out 'sike!' like her son had done so many times. A habit he must have picked up during school.

Emma pulled Regina roughly to her feet, falling back into the wall thanks to her temporarily disabled leg and pulling the brunette with her. Regina smacked into the younger woman with an oomph as she attempted, but failed to sidestep the disaster.

Clearing her throat, Regina quickly took a step back.

"Graceless as always," She chided, smoothing the fabric of her shirt.

"Thankless as always," Emma jibed back, rubbing at her ribs where Regina's elbow had collided none too gently.

"Why should I thank you for pulling me from one hard surface only to smack into another?"

"Because I was being nice but you know what? Just nevermind," Emma huffed in irritation, throwing her hands into the air and turning back to the guest room, finding that desperately wanted to be alone. She needed time to think and to process everything that had just happened. Regina's admissions of her painful past was something the blonde was simply not prepared to hear, regardless of how much she wanted to.

She shuffled towards the door, favoring her right leg over her left as the latter was still in the late stages of blood recirculation.

"You're limping." Regina noted, but didn't move to assist her.

"Don't act as if you care, Madame Mayor."

"So I'll pose the question to you once more since you failed to give an answer the first time."

Emma spun around as quickly as she could with one uncooperative leg and glared at the older woman.

"What?" Emma sighed, rubbing her forehead.

"You claim to forgo heart-to-heart conversations, why have one with me?" Regina asked. Part of the question was built firmly on mild curiosity. The other part, well, that stemmed from some long forgotten desire for companionship. Though she'd never admit that to the Sheriff, nor to anyone else for that matter, but it didn't stop the question from burning in the back of her mind.

"Good question," Emma shrugged, narrowing her eyes at Regina. "I'm still trying to figure out the answer for myself since all I get for it is a nice hearty serving of insults and a side of sass."

The bedroom door slammed closed with such a startling force the residual echo caused Regina to visible flinch in her own skin. She scoffed and flipped flipped an errant strand of hair from her face before squaring her shoulders and descended the grand staircase.

Emma bellyflopped onto the spacious bed, burying her head into the sheets and writhing around until her body fell into a comfortable position. Though her body found comfort, the same could not be said for her mind.

As if it wasn't bad enough that she had been suffering from hallucinations that have been both insanely hot and incredibly terrifying, but add on top of that the confounding dreams of a younger, more innocent version of Regina, but now there were these...feelings that Emma didn't quite know how to comprehend or explain.

The woman who once made her life hell here in Storybrooke has shown her a kindness she'd never known. That, in and of itself, was frustrating because she had come to associate the Mayor with with tension and animosity, not kindness. So the mere fact that Regina had made such swift change in her demeanor definitely threw Emma off her game. Like the whole world had shifted just an inch, barely noticeable, but now everything was slightly skewed.

Much as she didn't want to admit it to herself, she liked this side of Regina. She liked that that there was another side to the woman that Storybrooke had voted to be most likely to destroy everyone's happiness. Against all the ruckus in her head, screaming at her to abandon this train of thought before it derailed and caused such a calamity she'd never recover from it, Emma couldn't.

The moment they shared in the hallway; a moment riddled with secrets and regrets had been seared into her memory, filed under 'R'.

For Regina. For redemption. For realization.

In the quiet of the bedroom, Emma mulled over everything she'd learned about Regina. About her first love and her mother. And though the things she knew were vague, it still painted a clear picture as to how the brunette came to be the way she is now; cold to the point of frozen, meticulous to the point of diagnosable OCD, and apathetic to the point of Cherophobia.

Life had been cruel to Regina. Emma knew this now. Armed with that knowledge, she began to understand that the evil committed against her created the woman she knew. Life dealt shitty hands to the both of them.

Regina was just the woman life made her into. Broken, abused, and fated to struggle every moment with such painful memories; her life had never truly been her own.

Emma was unsure of how much time had passed since she'd flopped down onto the bed, but she knew night was approaching. The treetops of Maine's wilderness had begun to swallow the sun and gave way to the darkness that always waited so patiently. She was standing at the window, with one hand and her forehead pressed against it when a knock sounded at the door. She sighed, fogging the glass with her warm breath but made no effort to move from her pellucid sanctuary.

Not that it was necessary, as only a few seconds later, she heard the doorknob turning, knowing that it was Regina who stood on the other side.

"Miss Swan?"

The Mayor crossed hesitantly into the room, feeling the slight prickle of fear as she took in the Sheriff's body leaning slightly on the window.

"Regina," Emma acknowledged but didn't turn to face her.

"It's getting late."

"Really, thanks, I hadn't noticed," Emma rolled her eyes and was immediately thankful that she was facing away from Regina.

Regina gritted her teeth, doing her best to ignore the obvious sarcasm.

"Dinner is almost ready."

She barely finished her sentence before Emma waved her head dismissively and sighed.

"Not hungry."

"You haven't eaten since earlier," Regina tried her best to keep her voice level but Emma, as always, made it quite difficult. She just had to be so god damn stubborn.

"I said I'm not hungry, Regina," Emma practically yelled as she turned around the face the brunette. And as soon as she did, her eyes went wide and almost busted out in laughter.

Regina stood there at the door dressed in her typical expensive slacks and equally expensive shirt, but the stark white apron tied tightly around her body was unexpected to say the least. And yet, as ridiculous as it looked, it was at the same time appropriate. She couldn't explain it, but a little swell of warmth radiated in her stomach as she took in the sight of the woman before her.

This was not the Mayor of Storybrooke. This, well this was quite simply, Regina Mills.

"Something funny, Miss Swan?" Regina asked, arching an eyebrow while crossing her arms in front of her chest.

Emma smiled, taking a few steps forward and bringing her forefinger and thumb to cup her chin.

"I was just thinking…" Emma trailed off, shaking her head of her ridiculousness.

"That's shocking." Regina quipped, taking a step into the room.

"Hey! I'll have you know that I think quite often," Emma teased.

Regina rolled her eyes.

"And just how many of those thoughts pertain to artery clogging foods, leather jackets, and lewd fantasies?"

Emma turned her eyes upwards and contorted her face to reflect an action of deep thought before bouncing her head back and forth as she pretended to recap the majority of her thoughts..

"I'd say about 90 percent give or take." Emma shrugged. "But I was just thinking that you'd make an excellent poster girl for 'The Real Housewives of Storybrooke'."

"Miss Swan, you need a hobby," Regina sighed after a few seconds of silence.

"I have plenty of hobbies, Madame Mayor," Emma huffed and crossed her arms to mimic the woman in front of her.

"Oh?" Regina inquired, a smile forming on her lips. "Drinking copious amounts of vodka and slacking off don't count."

A frown tugged at Emma's thin pink lips.

"Damn," she sighed almost disappointedly, "That's upsetting 'cause I'm really good at those things. Add serving up some finely crafted sarcasm and you've nailed my only redeeming qualities"

Regina stepped closer to the blonde and gave her a bright smile.

"Don't put yourself down, dear," She said, pushing a strand of gold behind Emma's ear, "You have other talents."

She nearly shied away from the gesture, but through sheer force of will, Emma didn't move an inch; didn't take her eyes from the brunettes. She swallowed the lump of apprehension that was building in her throat.

"Like what?"

Regina took a step back, schooling her features once more.

"Like shoveling an obscene amount of food in your mouth. Now come have some dinner."

She turned and walked briskly out of the room while a stammering Emma stood frozen in place, attempting to formulate a coherent sentence.

After seconds of trying, Emma gave up. She shrugged her shoulders and blew a breath of air upwards, teasing the few strands of hair that had fallen back in front of her face.

"Asshole!" she mumbled to herself before heading out of the room and to the kitchen.

Regina stared wide-eyed at the ravenous blonde shoveling forkful after forkful of tetrazzini in her mouth. She was so disgusted by her barbaric etiquette and at the same time completely captivated by the sheer amount of food the Sheriff was capable of consuming in one go.

"Holy shit!" Emma managed over a mouthful of noodle and chicken. "This is amazing! It's like fancy ramen but with real chicken, not that processed and dried crap."

"Try chewing before you swallow, it'll do wonders for your taste palate." Regina drawled, taking a small sip of red wine.

"Unnecessary."

"Then at least wipe the sauce from your chin, dear."

"Saving that for later."

"Charming, as always," Regina jeered, then almost immediately snapped her mouth shut as the realization of what she just said dawned on her. It was both comical and disgusting at the same time. She instinctively reached for her glass of wine, took a hearty swallow and stood to refill her glass.

Emma watched the brunette pour a fresh glass of wine as she chewed her mouthful of tetrazzini and swallowed the gnashed ball of food with some difficulty.

"Where's mine?" Emma nodded her head towards the bottle of red wine resting on the countertop.

"No wine for you Miss Swan," Regina stated as she settled in her seat once more.

"What, why? That's not fair."

"Fairness is of no consequence to me, Miss Swan. Need I remind you that there is a dangerous poison in your body? You will not be adding more on my watch."

And just to spite the Sheriff, she swirled the red liquid in her wine glass thoughtfully before taking a sip and licking the lingering liquid from her cardinal lips.

The Sheriff drew in a deep breath through her nose and exhaled loudly.

"Really?" Emma intoned. "It's a glass of wine not a tumbler of vodka on ice."

"Apples and oranges."

"You know what? Fine. I don't want your fancy aged to perfection wine anyway." Emma pushed her empty plate away from her and slouched back in the chair with a petulant look on her face.

"Must you always act like a child?" Regina chided taking another sip of wine.

"Must you always be a bitch?" Emma countered.

Regina slammed the wine glass down on the table a little harder than intended. She narrowed her eyes and leaned across the table at the slouching blonde in the seat opposite of her.

"I'm a bitch?" She challenged.

"Yeah, you really are Madame Mayor."

"Really? I'm a bitch, really?"

"Did I stutter?"

"I fail to see how I am a bitch. I was the one that got you off the pier the other night. I attempted to get my hands on the cure for you. I opened my home to you. I retrieved your clothes, bought you lunch, cooked you dinner." Regina was nearly yelling as she ticked off each thing she had done on her fingers.

"I coaxed you back from multiple hallucinations, I cleaned your bloody mess off of my bathroom floor. Jesus, Emma, I shared some of my most painful memories with you because I am trying to help you. And yet that makes me a bitch?"

Emma slouched down in her seat even further, feeling her cheeks redden with embarrassment. At the end of the day, Regina was right. Aside from the Mayor's typical snide remarks and baiting comments, the woman was actually being quite nice.

And now Emma sat there, sunk in her seat, feeling like an asshole because the woman cared enough not to give her alcohol while she was already sick.

She brought her hands to her face and leaned her head back in the chair with a groan.

"God I am such a shitty person," she thought to herself.

Emma chewed at the inside of her cheek, debating on what she could say to Regina to make this better; to make this right. The only sounds in the kitchen now was glassware clinking together and heels tapping in a steady beat as the Mayor collected the dishes from the table and walked over to the sink.

Feeling that it was finally safe to remove her hands from her face, Emma did just that, but was unwilling to lift her eyes for fear of seeing the expression worn on Regina's face. Instead, she sat up slightly and laced her fingers together, cracking her knuckles as she took in a deep breath of air.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled like a humiliated child.

Regina said nothing.

"I just - I dunno. God I suck," the blonde sighed as she tried in vain to find the right words to say. "Regina I really do appreciate everything you've done. It's just you have this...ability to get under my skin. And to be honest, you frustrate the hell out of me. Normally I could just I dunno, ignore it, but you, god you make it so impossible."

Emma sighed again, knowing that what she was saying was not coming out the way she intended.

"Look, I'm just a shitty person. You would think that given my past I wouldn't take shit for granted but that's exactly what I'm doing, isn't it? I was so used to getting pushed around and walked all over so eventually I developed this defense mechanism or whatever. Like I just treated everyone like shit because that's the treatment I always expected. I mean, fuck," Emma exhaled, finally bringing her eyes up to look at Regina who was standing in front of the sink with one hand on her hip, eyes locked onto Emma's, and her head tilted slightly to the right.

"Damn it, Regina, I really suck at this. But just know that I'm sorry. For everything," The Sheriff concluded and dropped her gaze once more to her entwined fingers.

She heard Regina walking slowly back over to her and she prepared herself for inevitable verbal volley. But when she saw a sun-kissed hand rest easily overtop of her trembling, pale hands, Emma's head snapped up so quickly she thought for sure she'd just given herself whiplash.

Regina was smiling at her; a small, kind, understanding smile.

"Thank you, Emma," Regina said.

"You're… not mad?" Emma questioned skeptically.

"No, dear, I'm not."

"Why?" Emma countered too quickly. "Not that I'm not appreciative of that...but I mean...why?"

Regina gave the Sheriff's hands a little squeeze before withdrawing her hand. She sighed.

"Because…" Regina started, tearing her gaze from glistening green orbs to the suddenly fascinating whitewashed walls of the kitchen. "Because I understand. I know what its like to have a defense mechanism. And I know what it's like to be helplessly frustrated by someone that you loathe. Because I know what it's like to be a slave to the toxin in your body."

A small smile formed on pale pink lips.

"You ever have those moments when you just stop and take a second to contemplate your life?" Emma asked with a small laugh.

Regina narrowed her eyes slightly, unsure of where the blonde was taking the conversation.

"No, not frequently…"

"Yeah but seriously. I mean, my entire perception of you is so wrong. It's like everyone in this fucking town practically brainwashed me into thinking that you're just an evil bitch. And instead of forming my own opinion of you...I kinda just went along with it, especially since we argue sometimes."

"Sometimes?" Regina repeated.

"Often," Emma amended.

"..."

"Okay, like all the damn time, but still!" The Sheriff waved her hand distractedly. "Look, what I'm saying is...I was wrong about you."

Regina sighed, her brown eyes remaining firmly on the Sheriff.

"It's quite alright. I'm very much accustomed to people getting 'the wrong impression' and painting me in colors that they deem appropriate."

"They're just idiots," Emma shrugged, rising from the chair and patting her now filled stomach.

"Idiots indeed," Regina agreed.

"So what do you wanna do tonight?" Emma questioned, trying to steer the conversation away from such heaviness.

"I'm sorry, do?" Regina inquired, raising an eyebrow as if the blonde had just asked the most ridiculous question possible.

"Uhh yeah...do...like as in watch tv or whatever," Emma shuffled her feet, suddenly feeling shy and embarrassed.

"Miss Swan, do not mistake this sudden civility to be a blossoming flower of friendship. We're not going give each other pedicures while flipping through Cosmo, and watching The Notebook," Regina's words dripped with venomous sarcasm.

Emma gave her a critical look.

"No one even likes The Notebook, Regina, jeez." Emma said rolling her eyes, "Gawd!"

Much to the surprise of the Mayor and the Sheriff, both women burst out in an easy, light-hearted laughter.

File that under 'R'.