Title: The Advantages of Having No Sense of Personal Space
Author: SomewhereBeyondReality
Rating: K
Summary: Or Four Times Everyone Thought Something was Going On and Four Times They Didn't. Monica and Chandler are friends, everyone knows that. They're just friends who cuddle...and hold hands...and occasionally fall asleep on the couch together...Not weird. Premondler.
Disclaimer: Hi Marta Kauffmen here, I got sick of writing for millions of viewers and making a fortune so turned to fanfiction. Hope you enjoy!
A/N: This fic has been floating around for a while now and I'm excited it's FINALLY in existence. I was rewatching some old eps and realized how...touchy Monica and Chandler were in early seasons. Seriously, watch some premondler episodes and there are quite a few when they're just curled on the couch or cuddling up or holding hands. (And Monica certainly doesn't do that with Joey, or Chandler with Pheebs and Rachel). None of the other Friends find it weird but then I realized that was excellent justification for how they hid their 'Secret Relationship': They've been acting (from an outsiders perspective) like a couple for years! I thought there was probably some back story, so...here we are. I've tried to keep the dates consistent with show, we never know when exactly Monica and Chandler moved into their apartments but in my head-canon Monica moved in after finishing Culinary school, then Chandler graduated and Monica tipped him off about the free apartment. They're neighbours for a month or two while looking for roommates. (Phoebe comes shortly after that, followed by Kip and later Joey and Rachel).
X-X
Ross – 1990:
He's thrilled Chandler has moved across the hall from Monica, his sister and his roommate have been friends ever since the toe-cutting incident and he's glad they'll be neighbours. Especially since he won't be around as much because of his doctorate and Carol.
But he's not thrilled to walk into Chandler's apartment and find him and Monica sleeping on the couch together.
It would be cute in a different circumstance: his arms wrapped around her, her snuggling into his chest. But this is his little sister and that makes it decidedly not cute. So he grabs Chandler and yanks him off the couch.
"Ow!" Chandler yells, tumbling to the ground. "Dude!"
"Ross?!" Monica jerks up, staring around frantically. "What's wrong?"
"What's wrong?! Chandler's been here one day and I find him snuggled up with my sister?! What the hell are you guys doing?"
"Nothing!" Chandler protests, rubbing the back of his head. "She came over last night and we fell asleep!"
"What was she doing here so late?"
"She has a name!" Monica snapped "And I was helping him unpack, we got talking and fell asleep. That's not a crime is it?!"
Ross looks at them, Chandler wincing and Monica glaring back.
"So there's nothing going on?"
"No!" They yell.
"You're not...doing anything?"
"No!" Chandler insists, carefully standing up. "Apart from checking myself for a concussion."
"We're just friends Ross." Monica says, "We have been for years. God, you see two people hugging and assume they're together? Just because you've only ever slept with one –"
"Ok shut up now!"
Grumbling and scowling at him, Monica and Chandler head towards the kitchen. Within minutes he's teasing her about some guy's number she's got taped to the fridge with a pro/con list of whether to call him back, and she's shoving pancakes onto his plate.
Ross sighs, maybe he overreacted, this is just how they are together.
Phoebe – 1991:
She dumps her lamp on the bedside table and smiles. Her own room, in a gorgeous apartment (that she's knows is illegally sublet but when did that hurt anyone?) with a nice, if neurotic, new roommate. Everything's perfect.
"Hey Monica," she calls, "Could you give me a hand with the rest of the stuff?"
"Coming!" Monica replies bouncing through the door. "And I've brought help."
"You mean slave labour." Someone says in an amused tone.
Phoebe glances over to see who the voice belongs to. A young man stands behind Monica; he looks about her age with kind, mischievous eyes that crinkle when he smiles. Monica is smiling as well, her face lit up with playful affection.
"The least you can do is help." She says to the guy.
"Ok, ok, but you're helping Kip move in."
"Kip? Whose Kip?"
"My roommate, didn't I tell you I found someone?"
"No!"
"Oh. Well I did. He's called Kip and he's moving in next week."
"That's great! And of course I'll help him move in with you. I love unpacking!" She says enthusiastically and to Phoebe's worry without irony.
"Of course you do, you're a crazy –" Phoebe notices how he sees her murderous glare and quickly switches tracks. "– ily capable, super-organized, utterly incredible human being!"
"Nice save." Monica laughs, and turns back to Phoebe.
"Pheebs this is Chandler."
"Hi!" She says, carefully observing their banter and the way they stand together casually invading each other's personal space. "So are you Chandler The Boyfriend?"
Chandler and Monica both stare at her in shock.
"No way," Monica says firmly. "Just Chandler."
"Absolutely." He agrees. "Chandler the Friend."
"Chandler the Neighbour."
"Chandler Her Brother's Ex-College Roommate."
"Chandler the Annoying Guy Who Keeps Stealing My Food."
"Chandler The Guy Who Is Helping You Carry These Boxes by the way."
"Chandler the Lazy –"
"Alright," Phoebe interrupts amused, before they can come up with another twenty Chandler The's. "I get it. That's quite a few names to remember. Is Just Chandler ok?"
"You can even shorten it to Chan Chan if you want...actually on second thoughts don't."
Monica glances at her watch.
"Come on Bing we'd better hurry with these boxes before it gets dark."
"As you wish." He follows her down the stairs and Phoebe smirks, clearly he's Just Monica's Chandler whatever else is going on.
Joey – 1993:
Joey wonders how long fetching a few beers takes because Chandler's been gone for ages.
He decides to see what's happened to his new roommate, dragging himself up from the couch and traipsing across the hall. He's still embarrassed and confused about the Lemonade incident with Monica. (Ok he misunderstood her 'lemonade' thing but still she turned him down. He can't remember the last time a woman did that!)
He stops at Monica's door but realizing its half open glances inside, surprised to see Monica and Chandler in the far corner. She wrapped only in a towel, and he's hugging her to his chest. They look totally relaxed embracing each other and not bothered by her being half dressed, in fact they're both smiling and...is Chandler stroking her arse? Joey blushes and quickly heads back to his apartment.
Well. That explains why she didn't want to have sex with him. (And why he isn't gay).
A few minutes later Chandler appears minus the beers.
"Hey, sorry I took a while," he says easily sitting back on the couch, clearly having forgotten his reason for going. (If Joey had been that close to a Towel-Clad Monicahe would have too).
Joey's made a decision while Chandler was off hugging their hot next door neighbour. He has to tell him about what happened with Monica. If he and Chandler are going to be friends (and he thinks they will be) he has to be honest from day one.
"Hey man," he says nervously, "there's something I've got to tell you."
He relates the Lemonade-Stripping-Incident and Chandler reacts as he expects.
"Are you crazy? You don't just strip in some girl's apartment! Especially not Monica's! She'd never go for that!"
"I know that now." Joey says sheepishly, "And I'm really sorry. But I didn't know about your guy's relationship."
Chandler's forehead crinkles. "What relationship?"
"Well aren't you, y'know...dating or something?"
Chandler laughs, though for a second Joey see's a flash of wistfulness in his eyes. "No way man, we're just friends."
"But you seemed close, and she turned me down and just now you went crazy when I told you and..." He trails off, not wanting to admit he saw the towel-hugging-thing.
"Not every girl who turns you down is already dating someone." Chandler says wryly. "As nice as it would be to believe that. And Monica's my best friend, I want to look out for her. That's all."
"Oh. Ok."
They go back to watching Baywatch, and Joey ponders this girl-friendship thing. He's never had that before, with seven sisters, he's had enough of girls, but what Monica and Chandler have...well maybe there's something to it.
(When he meets Phoebe he starts to understand).
Rachel - 1994:
She's not really sure what it is about Monica and Chandler. They don't go all mushy or have festering sexual tension or act like boyfriend and girlfriend. Monica is still hung up on Paul the Wine Guy and Chandler is busy being rejected by every woman in New York. So there isn't anything romantic going on. They just hang out a lot and...sit really close to each other.
Rachel gets used to walking into a room to find them sharing a chair or cuddling up on the coffee house couch. No one else finds it weird, maybe it's what friends do. She wouldn't know, she hasn't had real friends before. (Though she does notice Monica doesn't cuddle on the couch with Joey that way). They're just close.
But when she gets up for a drink at 1 in the morning and finds them watching a movie with Chandler's legs draped across her best friends lap, Rachel has to ask.
"Um Mon," She asks hesitantly the next morning. "Is there um, something going on between you and Chandler?"
Monica snorts, making Rachel feel stupid for even asking.
"No way. "We're just friends. Why would you ask?"
"I – I don't know. You guys just seem...close."
"Where have I heard that before?" Monica asks wryly, shaking her head. "Don't worry Rach, there's nothing going on with me and Chandler, we've known each other for so long I guess we're relaxed with each other. You'll get used to it."
And that's that. She does get used to it. Within a few weeks she, like the other three, doesn't even notice it anymore. They're Monica and Chandler. They're friends who use each other as cuddle buddies. It's not weird, it's them.
X-X
Ross – 1998:
"Hey guys," He says, storming into Monica's apartment, "Guess what? They didn't cancel my other order. So by tomorrow I should expect a box of pitiable, beheaded teddy bears!"
No one responds and he looks around confused. Monica and Chandler are curled in the armchair together, both fast asleep and looking slightly flushed.
He softens for a moment, thoughts of Emily vanishing. They look peaceful together with her head tucked under his chin and his arm draped over her shoulders. Deciding to find someone else to complain to, he creeps out of the apartment, closing the door quietly.
The moment the door clicks shut, Monica and Chandler open their eyes, sighing with relief.
"That was close," Monica says breathlessly, smoothing down her rumpled hair. "Sorry about that. I just couldn't take another hour of Ross's moaning."
Chandler nods, his heart still thumping erratically.
"Me neither...though I don't think I've ever put a shirt on that quickly."
She cups his flushed cheek in her hand and smirks seductively. "Wanna see how fast you can take off a shirt?"
"You read my mind."
Phoebe – 1998:
"Did you drink some of my coffee?"
"Um…no?"
"You did! I went to the bathroom and you drank some of my coffee! Order your own drink."
"But see, I'm not thirsty enough to merit my own drink. I'm a little bit thirsty. Like a couple of sips of your drink thirsty, not a whole new coffee thirsty. I'm saving money this way."
"Saving your money, spending mine. And a couple of sips? Half of its gone!" Monica pokes Chandler in the ribs and he mock-glares back.
"Did you just poke me?"
"Um….no."
"Sure Mon."
Chandler grabs one wrist in one hand and tickles her ribs with the other. Monica laughs, squirming away and slapping him with her free hand.
"Let go of me Bing!"
"Make me. Ow!"
Monica pinches his arm hard and Chandler drops her hand, yelping causing Phoebe to look up and glare at them, trying to concentrate on her new song. "Will you guys shhh! Genius doesn't come easily."
"Sorry Pheebs," Chandler apologizes, "I was defending myself from – argh!" Monica springs on him, tickling under his arms, which, from his squirming, Phoebe speculates is his weak point
"Stop woman! We're disturbing Phoebe!"
Monica stops and glances over. Her face is flushed red, her eyes sparkling blue and she's still laughing. Phoebe can't remember the last times she's looked so happy.
"Sorry Pheebs we'll leave you in peace now. We've got to go anyway."
"Why?" Chandler asks.
"Y'know…laundry."
"Oh right." His face brightens. "Of course. Laundry."
She grabs his hand and stands, dragging him with her. They exit the coffee house, hands entwined, still poking each other.
The women behind Phoebe murmur quietly. "They're such a sweet couple."
Phoebe shakes her head, bending over her song again. They're not a couple, they're just Monica and Chandler.
Joey – 1998:
"Hey man, I'm gonna have to cancel fireball tonight." Joey says when Chandler walks in the door.
"Let me guess?" His best friend says wryly. "A date?"
"A double date." He smirks. "Back to back."
"Great, I'm really happy for you."
"Me too. But sorry man, I know we had plans."
"It's ok." Chandler reddens slightly. "Actually, uh Monica was thinking of coming over."
"To do what?"
"Just watch a movie, we've got a list we've been wanting to watch for ages. It'll be fun."
Joey can't help laughing at his best friend. Seriously it's a Friday night, and Chandler's watching movies with a woman, with no hope of sex. And he and Monica have done this more times than he can remember. Jeez.
But that night he puts on his coat and glances over at the barcaloungers. Chandler and Monica are curled in a chair together, leg twisted together as they quietly compare two movies. Joey watches as Chandler points to one video cover, making Monica beam widely and ruffle his hair. Joey grins.
Maybe Chandler can go on a proper date next week. Whatever makes them happy.
Rachel – 1999:
"Monica! Monica? Hello? Anyone?"
She searches through the apartment for her roommate, yanking open the door to her room.
"Oh there you are, I've been looking – Chandler? What are you doing here?"
It's a weird sight, Chandler and Monica are cross-legged on Monica's bed facing each other, him clad in pyjama's (cowboys? Really Chandler?) and Monica in a flimsy nightgown. They stare bug-eyed at her, looking stricken and weirdly scared.
Rachel raises her eyebrows, feeling confused. What the hell is Chandler doing in Monica's bedroom at 9:00pm on a Saturday night?
"Hey Rach," Monica says nervously, "Um, weren't you at the movies?"
"Yeah, but it starts later than I thought. I was going to see if you wanted to come, but clearly you're...well what are you guys doing?"
"Um..." Monica looks panicked for a moment, eyes roving around the room, before her face brightens and she grabs two objects on the bed beside her. "Sock sorting! I was teaching Chandler the proper way to organize his socks!"
"Yeah!" Chandler agrees enthusiastically. "Sock sorting! It's a life skill!"
Rachel blinks, shakes her head and gives up.
"Well, whatever works for guys. Have an...uh fun night."
She leaves and closes the door behind her. She loves her friends to bits, but dressed in pj's, sock sorting? Seriously? What can you do? It's just so...well, Monica and Chandler.
X-X
A/N: Thoughts? Crap? Terrible? Best writing since Dickens? I won't know if you don't review. To make it clear don't think Chandler and Monica acted like a couple in a romantic/unresolved sexual tension way but I do think they were very close physically and comfortable with each other, which is what this fic is about REVIEW!