The school picnic

"How lovely!" Morticia Addams stated when she read the invitation from Pugsley's nursery school, inviting them to join the end of term picnic.

Gomez looked at the invitation over his wife's shoulder. The colourful layout of the paper was off putting, but it was a nice idea.

"We'll be there. What time is it?" He asked.

"It's on friday at...11 am?" She replied, her eyes widening at the odd time.

"Won't it be a bit too sunny?"

"It must be a typo, it's probably at 11 pm."
"Why don't we phone the nursery, so other parents won't get confused."

"Capitol idea!" Gomez picked up the old fashioned phone and dialled the phone number.

The red headed woman in the office filed her nails boredly. She sighed as she heard the nauseating sound of the 'Early Bird Club' children singing 'Ring around the Roses' for what seemed like the eight hundredth time and reminded herself that this job was paying for her college degree.

The brightly coloured phone rang.

"Hello, Wheels on the Bus nursery this is Charlotte speaking." She said in an up beat voice that said 'I love my job'. That voice took practice and two cans of Red Bull.

"Yes hello, this is Mr Addams. I'm calling regarding your picnic invitation."

Charlotte grimaced, expecting another 'I'm sorry, I just can't make it. But the nanny will take him/her'.

"It's perfectly fine if you are unable to attend, sir."

"No, we'd be delighted to go!" She was surprised at how genuine the man sounded.

"Okay, then how may I help?"

"There seems to be a typographical error on the invitation and we didn't want the other parents to be confused by it" She glanced over the unsettlingly bright invitation.

"Wheels on the Bus nursery end of term pinic, Childrens play park, parachute games, 11 am, bring a packed lunch...Everything seems to be in order-Oh they misspelled picnic. Thank you for bringing that to our attention." She said, wondering just how much of a grammar nazi this man was.

"Isn't there a problem with the time?" He asked

"No, 11 am is the correct time." She replied, searching her mind for a potential problem.

"Okay then" He said, sounding slightly confused.

"Thank you, have a nice day!" She said, sounding as nauseatingly bright as possible.

As soon as she placed the red, plastic reciever down. She sighed and felt her cheeks ache from the wide, fake smile she had gotten into the habit of putting on when talking to a parent.

She massaged her cheeks and drank some more of the energy drink she had been surviving on. After staying up all night writing an essay on the development of biochemical research, she was exhausted and coming in to the brightly coloured office at the Wheels on the Bus nursery wasn't a great start to the day. She looked at the window that separated the office from the entrance hall and wished she could draw a blind over it so none of the rich parents who expected nothing less than a 'Your child is super special!' attitude and a smile which could have been stolen from the Joker.

She practically stood to attention when she heard the buzzer for the door. She stashed her can of Red Bull under the yellow plastic desk and pressed the button which released the door. Really there's no difference between 'release the door' and 'release the hounds'. She thought as the child and her mother entered.

"Hi Mrs. Weiss, hi Cassie!" she said in a sugary sweet tone. The designer clad child waved, her perfectly styled blonde hair bouncing. This arrival would be the first of many.

Charlotte prepared for battle.

"The picnic is at 11 am." Gomez informed Morticia.

"What an odd time for a picnic. Ah well, we'll be there anyway."

"I'll go and get Wednesday up from her nap." Gomez said and walked up the stairs to their 13 month old daughters nursery.

He opened the door quietly and walked over to the black wooden cot. He looked inside and saw his daughter sleeping peacefully. Her thick black hair messy from sleep and she opened her blue eyes.

Gomez couldn't help but smile as she reached her pale arms up at him. He picked her up and rocked slightly before he carried her downstairs.

"Lets go see your gorgeous mother, shall we?" Wednesday merely snuggled into her fathers shoulder and his heart melted slightly.

They walked downstairs to see Morticia feeding her plants.

"Was she still asleep?" Morticia asked.

"Yes, I think she's still half asleep" Gomez chuckled as Wednesday sleepily rubbed her eyes with a pudgy fist.

Morticia gave Wednesday a kiss on the head and Gomez took her to feed her her bottle.

"Querida, do you think we should take Wednesday to the picnic tomorrow?"

"Of course, I think Pugsley would like to have his baby sister there."

"I agree, Wednesday might enjoy it as well, despite the awful timing."

Wednesday finished her bottle, her surprisingly sharp front teeth making puncture marks in the black rubber.

Morticia chuckled as she came to change her diaper and Gomez went to get a tie without Yak milk on the front and drive Pugsley to nursery. He liked to do this himself.

The Addams' arrived at the picnic at 11 am sharp. Wednesday and Pugsley had both been slathered in spf 75 suncream and Morticia was wearing her cat eye sunglasses. Due to the weather she was wearing a tight black knee legnth skirt and a black blouse instead of her usual floor length dresses. Gomez found the sight of her pale legs unfair on a day when they were at a picnic for children in nursery as his thoughts would be directed in a particular way that would be considered decidedly inappropriate for children.

Gomez, however was still wearing a 3 piece suit and a pair of near-opaque sunglasses.

They looked around at all the other children. All of the girls were wearing bright, floral sundresses and the boys were wearing pastel-coloured polo shirts and some form of shorts. The parents were dressed in appalling pastel or white outfits as well.

Gomez and Morticia were taken aback by the array of poor colour choices, but they were never people to judge others based on appearance, so they continued into the park. Pugsley holding Wednesday's hand as she toddled beside him. Morticia and Gomez walked behind them, her arm in the crook of his elbow. Grandmama and Uncle Fester had decided to stay home, as did Lurch and Thing.

They laid down their picnic blanket and Pugsley went to his teacher to inform her of their arrival.