The Fault In Our Stars is my favorite book of all time. So here is a story it. I don't know if its going to be a real long story, but I will keep it going for now. Please R&R! Love you all!

I watched my mom's hand as it gripped my own. I had been in the hospital for 5 days, and my lungs were filling up before the doctors could flush it out. Since Isaac left the world, and went up with Gus, I really only had my family come and visit.

"Hazel, are you crying?" Mom asked me with a worried tone I had come to know. I was, not that I wanted her to see.

"Kind of," I choked out. She just gave me a glare. "okay, I am." When she asked me why. I didn't know what my answer should be. I could say that it was because I missed Augustus, which I did. Or I could say because I was dying, or because of the pain. But I realized that I needed to be honest. It's a pretty crappy thing to lie to your family when you won't be alive much longer to tell the truth.

"Mom, I don't want to do this anymore." She look puzzled, like she didn't understand. So I explained, "I have always had a reason to live, and I still do. But I have never had a reason to die. I have never had a motive to say it's okay to let go. I never want to hurt anybody. But I'm hurting, and people around me are hurting because of me hurting." I was losing breath from all of the talking, I would not stop though.

"A lot of people have died, Augustus told me how many, and more people will keep dying." I paused, letting her think this over. "And I'm going to die eventually, even if I continue to fight as hard as I can I'm still going to die." I stopped again. I wanted my mother to say something, to prove she was actually listening.

"Hazel, sweetie, what are you saying?" I knew she knew. She had known for a while I was sure of it.

"Mom, I want to die." The look on her face was sadness, but she knew why I was done with the life I had. "I am ready, mom. I am ready to be done with the pain that is a side affect of what I have. You understand don't you? That this is what I want? I don't want to leave you, but I need a fresh start. I am ready to let go. I am going to lose the battle anyways, please…can I lose now?"

She didn't say anything for a while. Her eyes went back and forth between my eyes and what was beyond the window. I was feeling very tired, talking didn't help. I told her I wanted to sleep. She look panicked for a moment. I told her not sleep forever, not now, just for the night. She nodded and left me to the quite.

I hoped I didn't hurt her even more. But I was ready. I needed to leave all of the pain and suffering behind me. I looked up to the sky, wondering if Gus was watching me. I always wondered about that. I hoped so. I hoped that he knew how much I thought about him. Could he hear my thoughts? I squinted up at the ceiling of my hospital room. He didn't forget me did he? Is your brain wiped clean when you go up there? He wouldn't…he can't. No, he didn't. God, must be the drugs or something getting to my head.

I rested my head against the pillow. I pulled a paper off the the side table. It was the letter Augustus sent to Van Houten. I had them memorized, but I still kept them. I needed to see the actually pen strokes Gus had put on paper. I re-read them, like I did every night. Except this time was different. I cried almost every time, which you would think would suck all the water from my lungs, but no. This time though, I didn't cry. Not one tear was shed while I read the words, when I reached the line I love her. I am lucky to love her. I smiled. I looked back up toward the sky, which was blocked by the stupid ceiling, but I looked there anyways.

"As am I lucky to love you." I said out loud. I then laid the paper on the side table, and rested my eyes. Not forever though, not just yet.