"Doctor, I just need to know what's happening to me !"screamed Samantha Carter, running her fingers through her blonde, very lesbian-like hair. She looked at her doctor, who of course had never heard of the Stargate program. He only looked confused and brushed some dust off of his vibrant sweater.

"Ms. Carter, I'm afraid that I can't help you with all your yippin and your yappin. Kids theses days and their weeds! What you really need is to be checked into a facilililility to help with your… ahumeeey (cosby cough) problems." Said Bill Cosby. Somehow he had graduated medical school and become a doctor, even though he is a complete idiot in the show. Samantha knew exactly who he was since she had been in love with Bill Cosby since she was a little girl and had to watch reruns of the Cosby Show in Space Sunday School. You see, in the year_(whatever time SG1 is…) the Cosby Show was what the future inhabitants of our universe had discovered what God was. Bill Cosby was the sex god…. To Samantha Carter at least.

"I'm telling you! It's not weed! I'm really from the future!" said Samantha, yearning for some Cosby booty. "I NEEDED TO COME HERE SO I WISHED FOR IT By THE STARGATE ON MY BIRTHDay AND HERE I AM. Nothing like this has ever happened before to anyone in the crew that I know of! Look, I know I look like a lesbian, but this is sexy hair in the future! I promise! I wished that I could be your wife and here I am."

"Uhm, gee the only black hard thing that I can offer you is a jell-o pudding pop!" giggled Bill cosby. He then felt queasy after thinking about his last experience with pudding pops (he put them in his butt) and vomited all over Carter. "I'm so…" BARF "sorry Ms. Carter! Guess I'll have to become a Mormon and marry you too since I already have a wife to repay you. Hope you don't mind tiny Raven Symone."