Chapter 8

"Why did it have to be him? Why does he have to be my neighbor? Him, of all people?! He's arrogant. He's a manwhore. He's an idiot. Will Herondale is nothing but a fucking piece of—"

Tears burned fiercely in her eyes as she wrote in her diary. Stop, she said to herself, stop. You're pathetic. If anybody saw her now, almost crying over a boy who didn't care the slightest bit about her... It was clearly a pathetic sight.

"He has every right to do whatever he wishes to. That certainly includes sleeping with other people. Who am I to stop him? Who, on this earth, am I to claim rights over him? He doesn't belong to me, nor will he ever. I am so stupid."

"Maybe the reason I'm so angry is because I'm not as indifferent to him as I thought I was. It's not like I fell in love with him. But I might like him a little."

"I am so dumb. I thought there was an understanding between us. That's why I felt a little bit drawn to him lately. He's funny, and nice, and we share common interests, such as books. Well. At least, he was all those things."

No. She was acting like an immature child. She couldn't erase the good things about Will just because he was... kissing another girl. They weren't in a relationship! And she'd been delusional to think, even subconsciously, that maybe they were developing something.

With one final sentence written, she closed her diary, placed it under the bed's mattress, and left the room.

"I will get over it."

The next day was pure torture. She couldn't even enjoy her English Literature class with all those messy thoughts running through her head. And to think she was going to see Will in her P.E. class! Did he have practice on Thursdays? She was certain that he did. She felt a hole in her chest, and suddenly the air around wasn't enough. But she quickly composed herself; she would not faint just by thinking of him. She would not faint when she saw him. And she would most definitely not faint for anything that had to do with him.

"I'm trying to get over it, Sophie," Tessa whispered to her friend. "But even if it was just a fling at a party, I can't help but making it a bigger deal than it was."

"But it was a big deal!" Sophie hissed. "I mean, at least, it became a big deal. You even hung out together! You two are much more than just a one night stand," she insisted.

"You're supposed to tell me we aren't, so I have enough motivation to move on."

"Miss Gray!" the teacher suddenly called her name. "Is there something you wish to share with the whole class?"

"What? Uh, no, I—I'm sorry, Mrs.."

"It better not happen again," warned the teacher. Tessa resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the awful old lady. She may liked the subject, but the woman was unbearable. Or maybe she just simply didn't tolerate anyone that day.

"Anyway," Tessa whispered really quietly, "I don't know why, but I feel kind of drawn to him. It's hard to explain," she added when Sophie raised her both eyebrows. "But I just want to kiss him all the time, and, I don't know, he's really hot, and seeing him with that girl just..."

"You're rambling," Sophie pointed out. "And it seems pretty obvious to me. You, my dear friend, are sexually frustrated."

"What?!" Tessa burst out laughing, which obviously earned her another hateful look from the old woman trying to dictate the class in front of her, and she was given a "last warning" before detention. She shot a deadly glare to her friend and whispered "If I get detention because of you and your crazy ideas, then you're definitely gonna pay."

"Tessa, it's so obvious!" she whispered, completely ignoring her threat. "You barely remember that night, it's been months since your last time —without counting this one—, and, well, the boy is hot as hell. It's only natural," she shrugged. Tessa narrowed her eyes.

"Are you crazy?!" she hissed. "I am not sexually frustrated!"

"Yes, you are! You totally are, because you don't remember details about that night, and you guys were interrupted every other time you were about to make out!"

"Yeah, sure," Tessa said sarcastically, trying to keep her tone calmed. And quiet. "Just because we were cockblocked, and because my mind doesn't want to remember that night, doesn't mean..." Okay, maybe Sophie wasn't so wrong after all. Not that she was sexually frustrated, but her friend had a good point. It really did was natural to feel attracted to him, and all those little details just added... frustration? No, she wouldn't admit it. But if she was completely honest to herself, she was frustrated. "You're making me sound like a horny teenager."

"That you are," Sophie shrugged, and Tessa playfully smacked her friend's arm.

"But how would you explain the fact that I was so... jealous? That I am so jealous. I can't really think about him and that blonde without getting crazy in the inside," she admitted.

"You know, sexual frustration and liking someone are two things that can totally happen at the same time," Sophie suggested. "We've already established that your hormones are crazy. But you should also, for once, admit that you've developed some sort of attachment to the guy."

"I..." Tessa swallowed. "I don't know. I... I guess we'll have to see what happens. If something even happens..."

"I strongly suspect it will."

If she was jealous before, watching it all from a long distance, she sure as hell was now.

"I definitely never signed up for this." And she hadn't. A free show of Will and the blond skank making out during her P.E. class? Oh, what a perfect way to end the day. Didn't you come here to practice? You shouldn't be kissing people, she thought with rather bitterness. Sadly, it seemed like their practice hadn't even started yet.

"Well..." Sophie seemed to be thinking theories out loud. "What if he's just trying to make you jealous?"

"Why would he do that? There's no reason at all! He could've perfectly kissed me without trying to make me jealous. I'm telling you, he's an ass, Sophie. He probably just got tired of me."

"I don't know," Sophie reflected. "It doesn't sound like the guy you've described me after you went to Manhattan together."

"Yeah, well, he's probably bipolar or something," Tessa stayed silent for a few seconds, and then quietly added: "We were never anything, though. I keep forgetting that, and maybe you do, too. He has every right to do whatever he wants to."

"It just doesn't make sense to me," Sophie finally said, and their conversation reached to an end, for the class was already starting. During it, Tessa tried her best to ignore Will and the girl (who finally stopped making out after fifteen minutes of it) and to focus on running and jumping and all those dreadful physical activities she was supposed to do. There was a moment in which Will actually raised his hand to greet her, which made Tessa look at him weirdly and completely ignore him. Who did he think he was? He couldn't just pretend that their relationship didn't include a particular first meeting, and two —almost— kisses, then make out with a blonde ("Jessamine Lovelace", according to Sophie) and treat her on a friendly way. They were anything but just friends. Friends didn't do they stuff they've done!

She grew angrier as the minutes passed. She did not know what kind of external force overtook her later, but after the class ended and she changed her clothes, she found herself walking through the Men's Locker Room. Guys were shouting things at her, that went all the way from curses to flirty comments, given that most of them were at least half naked. But she didn't care, nor was she paying any attention at those details. She was way too confused, embarrassed, and most of all, angry, to notice what was happening around her. Or what was she even doing. And all due to a blue eyed boy she was trying to found in one of those rooms.

She spotted him just a few seconds later, inside a small room that had lockers and chairs in it.

Oh no.

"Tess?" he said frowning, as soon as he saw her entering the room.

Oh. No.

She definitely hadn't expected him to be without his shirt.

She knew she should be focused on what she'd came here to do, but nevertheless, she couldn't help but let herself a few seconds to enjoy the view in front of her. He was... He looked like a greek god. An eighteen year old boy should not be allowed to have that body. He had a full six pack —as a result of what, Tessa wasn't so sure, but she guessed it was because of the sports he played— with hard angles that made his body look even more masculine, and it made Tessa desperately want to touch him.

Sometimes, she even wondered how could a boy like him have been with a girl like her. This was definitely one of those moments.

It seemed like endless minutes had passed, but it had only been a few seconds before he spoke again, both of his eyebrows raised. "Do you usually make an habit to go into the Locker Rooms and stare at men while they change?"

That definitely brought Tessa back to life. For all she cared, he could look like the sexiest boy on this planet and he would still be an asshole, and she would still be mad at him. "You... who do you think you are?" she spat out.

"Uh," that seemed to confuse Will. "Will Herondale? You know, as in, your neighbor? As in, the person you'd slept w—"

"Stop!" she groaned. "For once, Will, just shut up. You've got some nerves to be joking around, pretending that everything's okay. Well, it's not!"

"What do you mean?" he asked, taking a step closer.

"You know what I mean. You sticking your tongue down that girl's throat during all fucking class, and then waving your hand at me, like this is all completely normal!"

"Uh," said Will, completely serious, until a smirk slowly appeared in his lips. "So, what you're trying to say to me is that you're jealous?"

"What—No! I'm not jealous! I'm just tired of you—you, and your attitude, and you being such a man whore, sleeping with me, going out with me and then kissing another girl in my face! If you want to be with that blonde, fine, have your way at it— but stop hitting on me!" she practically yelled, nothing but anger running through her veins.

"When did I, exactly, hit on you?"

"Don't try to turn this around, you know you have," she said, looking at him straight in the eye. Nothing could break their eye contact in this moment. "Saying all those flirty comments, almost kissing me in two different occasions... even inviting me to Manhattan!"

Will stood silent for a second, and then chuckled. It was deep, low chuckle that made Tessa nervous.

"Wow," he smiled. Somehow, it wasn't one of those warm, reassuring smiles that made one happy. It was having the exact opposite effect on Tessa. "I can't believe your ability to confuse things this much. You were just a fuck at a party, Tessa, that's it. There was never more."

Tessa's eyes flashed with fury at his audacity to talk to her that way. "Excuse me?"

"You've heard me."

"How dare you?!" she yelled at him. "Just a fuck at a party? I-I—," she stammered, not being able to think with clarity. "Ugh!" she exclaimed. "You're a fucking idiot, William. You know it was more than that," she said, her gaze piercing through his, getting closer step by step. "You act like you're indifferent to this whole thing. I know you're not," she said with certainty. She couldn't explain what sudden urge overcame her, nor she would be able to explain the reason of why she did what she did next, but it was completely driven by her instincts. She swallowed slowly, her face now just a few inches away from his, and said, "let's just see how much of just a fuck I've been."

And then she was kissing him. And yes, she had started it.

He seemed to have lost it too as his hand cradled her head and his other grabbed her closer by the waist. Their lips were suddenly moving against each other feverishly, desperately, like they couldn't get enough.

She couldn't help the moan that escaped her when his tongue delved into her mouth. She was being driven by an instinct full of lust, that unable her to think how good or wrong this behavior of hers was. She cupped his face as their lips met over and over again, their tongues tangling deliciously, her body in awe as a result of having him so close, his bare chest touching her.

Will's hands suddenly dropped down to just under the curve of her backside and lifted her into his arms as she brought her legs to twine around his hips. He quickly backed her against a wall; muffled grunts and groans sounded from their throats as Tessa's fingers tangled in his hair.

She had thought of that night -the night of the party- as if it involved another version of her, an utterly and complete different Tessa. But right now, kissing William like there was no tomorrow, she understood her drunken self more than she ever thought she would.

"Good lord," he whispered when their lips parted, gasping for breath. She only moaned against his mouth and pulled his lips back to hers. She seriously couldn't get enough of him.

He began to gradually make his way from her mouth to her neck, trailing wet butterfly kisses along the side of it. She squirmed, soft sounds coming from her as her breath hitched when he started to suckle on a particularly sensitive area. This is so wrong...

There was a loud knock at the door, and piece by piece the world came back to them. Tessa opened her eyes to stare at Will, his blue eyes more darker than ever and his lips swollen from the kisses, and a wave of realization hit her.

"Must be that girlfriend of yours," she whispered, and quickly got off his grab and went out the room, only to find a very surprised Cecily Herondale on the other side.

"Tessa!" the blue eyed girl exclaimed happily. "It's been a long time since we don't— hey, what were you doing in there?"

She felt the blush making its way to her cheeks. "I... I needed to talk to Will about something," she said, avoiding her intimidating gaze. "We'll talk later, Cecy."

Being that said, she practically ran away from her neighbors and hurried to get out from school, leaving not only a confused Cecily behind her, but a very confused Will as well.

A/N: I think that this is the first chapter that doesn't end with a terrible cliffhanger... lol. I was actually planning to end it with someone interrupting Will and Tessa but it was repetitive and unnecesary.

THANK YOU ALL for your kind words. Really, you're so nice. I'll be totally free from school on the 19th (of December, of course) so don't really expect an update before that. Or maybe yes. But the thing is after that I'm probably gonna be able to update more often (yay!).

About the people who want Jem: I wasn't originally planning on making him appear, but I kind of miss his presence. So he's probably gonna show up at some point :)

Until next time!

Oh, and HUGE thanks to my amazing beta! :)