My Shin-chan

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Takao stared hard in front of his computer. Such a bunch of numbers. Every day of his life all he saw were numbers he had to weigh, total, and balance. There was a time when he used to love his job. Eight years ago, when he started working, he remembered he was such an excited young chap who thought balancing numbers on ledgers was the coolest thing in the world.

Now his job only seemed to suffocate him. When had accounting begun to get this lonely?

Takao sighed tiredly. Actually, the problem was him. Why didn't he have a steady boyfriend? Why wasn't there anyone within his age bracket who could show some passion that a mere teenager could? Takao suddenly thought all of the men he had gone out with in the past were all lame compared to Shin-chan. And come to think of it, the men who also frequented the gay bar he went to could not hold a candle to the boy either.

It was either they were not handsome enough, not tall enough, or their shoulders were not broad enough for his liking. Suddenly everyone became so – so inadequate.

Why?

Why?

Why couldn't he get that stupid dumbass of a child out of his mind? Takao massaged his throbbing temple. He definitely did the right thing, didn't he? Letting go of the kid was the noblest thing that he could do. So why did he spend his days wishing things would have been different? Why did he have this deep yearning to go call Shin-chan and tell him he changed his mind and as long as they could probably be discreet then they could try dating?

Takao wanted to beat himself up. Listen to yourself! Asking a kid to date you! And it was as if he had Shin-chan's or Kazumi's cell phone number. In all of the five years that they had been neighbors, Takao hadn't actually gotten any of their number. There had been no point, then.

Takao straightened on his seat, trying his damn best to focus on what he was doing. He was in the middle of his shift! His boss needed this ledger done before the day ended.

He'd wait for the wedding invitation. Then he'd go, check up on Shin-chan, and – And then what?

Takao knew once he saw the boy once more, there was no doubt he would break down and ask him if they could start all over again.

Unacceptable.

No. He would not go to the wedding. It would be more trouble than it was worth. He didn't want to be subjected to a kind of temptation that was already insurmountable from the beginning. There was no point in tormenting himself that way. Takao told himself it was only because Shin-chan was the most attractive guy he had seen in a while. The attraction, the lust, they would fade. And in a short time, Shin-chan would probably have found another high-schooler to hook up with. Plain and simple.

Indeed, the wedding invitation did come three months after. With it was a letter coming from Kazumi that by some miracle her future father-in-law survived his illness so the wedding would happen earlier than they expected. It was a good thing for the family.

Takao stared long and hard at the stationery paper, reading the letter over and over. It also described how Shin-chan was doing. He was a freshman in Shutoku High now and immediately became a regular in the basketball club. And as always, his grades were top notch. Tanaka-san was also extremely pleased with the boy.

Takao crumpled the letter and the invitation and threw them on the trash bin, not looking back.

The day of the wedding, Takao went to the gay bar and picked up a guy, checked into a love motel and allowed the guy to screw him over and over.

The next morning, sitting on the bed while the nameless guy snored on the other side, Takao realized how sex, which used to be a pleasurable activity, seemed so boring nowadays. Last night he kept on thinking of green eyes just to reach orgasm.

Takao dropped his head on his palms.

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Takao went on with his life. Continued being an overworked accountant for that company since he had nothing better to do. Nowhere else to go. After a year Takao visited his parents in the countryside. They kept on asking him when he would get married, telling him even other gay men took up wives and had children.

Takao almost blanched at the dinner table, thinking how he would be like another Takeru if that happened. But he kept his mouth shut during his parents' lecture. It was their house and they could lecture him all they wanted.

Oh, there were men, a lot of them, some casual, some lasting for more than six months or so. Takao had always believed in monogamous relationships, so if the guy he was dating expressed wanting exclusivity, then Takao obliged. So far he had had two serious boyfriends since Takeru, and countless casual affairs when he was single in between.

There was even this guy he met at work – yes, again – and they started a serious relationship. He had even slept over Takao's place several times. But at the end of seven months of dating, they just got used to the routine, fell out of love and just mutually ended the relationship. Takao never even felt an ounce of regret. The guy wasn't even good in bed.

There was always something that he was looking for.

A forcefulness, a bluntness, a bit of arrogance, and willfulness that none of his lovers had ever had. Either they were too nice, or too soft, or too gruff.

Takao wished someone had green eyes. They were the most attractive color in a guy.

Three years after Kazumi and Shin-chan moved, Takao had lost count of how many men he had gone out with. It was like he was trying to prove something. He remembered telling Midorima during their last fight, the day the boy caught him and Takeru, Takao said he was not willing to put his life on hold and wait for Shin-chan. Takao didn't know if going out with all these men was trying to prove to Shin-chan that he was right and that he would meet his One True Love eventually.

But after three years and numerous meaningless fucks, Takao still had no one.

That particular year Takao's company was setting up a branch in Tokyo. They were sending a few of their senior accountants to supervise the projects they would be starting.

One day, Takao was called by his boss Nagata into his office.

"Close the door," Nagata instructed, waiting for Takao to sit across him. Takao did and waited for the news. More or less he had an idea of what was coming and it had left him feeling anxious and nervous these past few days.

"How many years has it been Takao that you have worked here?"

"Uhhh – "Takao did the computation in his head. "Eleven years, sir."

"Right. Eleven years of faithful service. You have been a great asset to this branch and we hate to lose you but – "

Takao's heart was beating like crazy.

"We're sending you to Tokyo. I'm sure you would have expected that because of your tenure. Since this is the second largest branch we are opening, and the projects being so new, they require special focus. So that's why we're sending the seasoned accountants there."

Takao could only nod. Wow, he was indeed going to Tokyo. Why did that fact make him suddenly nervous?

Nagata frowned. "Is there something, wrong, Takao-san?"

"No, Sir. I am – honored you chose me. I – I would need to relocate."

"Yes. The company is shouldering your relocation expenses and one month of rent, once you have presented the receipt."

"Thank you! That is – most helpful."

"Congratulations, Takao. This is like a promotion. In a year or two you can apply for the Junior director position because of your credentials," Nagata encouraged.

"Thank you, Sir."

Takao left the office in a daze. He was being sent to Tokyo.

To Tokyo of all places!

He smiled to himself. If there was a chance of him meeting Shin-chan there, would the boy still feel the same towards him as he did three years ago?

Naaaah – Takao removed the thought from his head. Shin-chan belonged in the past. There was no point of bringing up sad memories.

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After a few weeks, Takao found himself inside his own apartment sealing away the last of the travel box he would be bringing to Shinjuku, Tokyo. He made sure it was completely secured by the packaging tape and then labeled it kitchen stuff. He had labeled each box depending on what things it contained so that when he unpacked he would be able to start with the necessities.

Takao sighed, sitting down on the floor, tired from packing his stuff. He looked around his apartment, trying to memorize every detail, every corner into his memory. This was the house he had lived in for the past ten years, back when he was just a struggling accountant. In all honesty with Takao's savings he could have gotten a bigger place so many years ago. But he loved the neighborhood. He liked the other neighbors well enough, and especially when he met the Midorimas he forgot about wanting to leave.

Now he was relocating. And to Tokyo! How long had it been since Kazumi and Shin-chan moved out? Three years? Shin-chan would be eighteen. He must be a very handsome young man now.

Takao tapped his pentel pen on the box, contemplating. Should he break down and find Shin-chan? Afterall, he was eighteen now. Still very young, but at least he was not considered a child anymore. Maybe they could continue where they left off three years ago. Takao dropped his forehead on the surface of the box. Who was he kidding? Kazumi would have his hide if she found out. And he was not prepared to risk her friendship.

Takao stood, arching his back and feeling his muscles pop. He shouldn't entertain that stupid idea anymore. The boy probably wouldn't even recognize him at this point.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Shinjuku was truly like a dream. Takao had expected the city to be awesome, being an affluent commercial district where department stores, malls, restaurants and hotels were scattered, but now that he was here, he was still amazed at the sights and sounds.

Takao parted the curtain of his glass window, looking down at the fantastic view of the city at night. He was able to find a very small studio type condo that his budget could afford. His unit was at the 35th floor. Because the unit was so small, he had sold his old sofa and bed before coming here, buying a sofa bed instead. He only had the TV on the other side of the room. And his fridge. He had always been a minimalist, but at least his old apartment had a lot more space than this.

Still, he knew he had already gotten a good deal, to be situated in the heart of the city. He also had to walk only ten minutes to get to the accounting firm their company had newly opened here. Shops were everywhere. Gigantic shopping malls, chic restos and bless his soul, there was also Ni-chome, the number one and largest gay district in Tokyo.

Takao sat on his sofa. For some reason, even when he knew he was free to go explore the city, and probably spend the night in Ni-chome, he felt he had no inclination to do so. When was the last time he got laid anyway? Since he was busy with the move, he barely paid attention to his lack of sexual activities for the last few weeks. Takao laid the back of his head on the sofa's back rest. Whether he went out there searching for a guy to pick up, or just spend a quiet night on his sofa bed, it was all the same – it felt empty. So it wasn't worth the hassle. Sleep was the better option.

Over the next few days Takao became more absorbed with the new projects handled by their firm. Since he was a senior and his tenure was more than a decade, most of the time he did the training of the newer accountants. He was also assigned various projects and Takao was even astonished to find that some of his clients were really bigwigs in the market they were in.

Takao made a habit of buying his morning paper on his way to work. Actually he also ate his breakfast while walking the ten minute distance to the office. He was still a bit overwhelmed by so many people walking on the streets on the way to their jobs. The city was such a noisy crowded bustling place and Takao loved being a part of it, the everyday traffic, and the hustle and bustle. The city was teeming with life!

One day, during break time, Takao sat on his desk, while eating the kare-pan that he bought from the convenience store, he began reading his newspaper. Most of the time, he would concentrate on the news, especially the ones focusing on economy. He seldom read the feature stories, much less sports. However that day, there was a very big feature on one of Shinjuku's leading universities, Keio University. The university's basketball team was the story and it was even featured on the second page. Takao was about to ignore the article when his eyes caught a glimpse of green hair and glasses.

Takao stopped eating his bread, and looked carefully at the colored group picture of Keio basketball team. Two dozen young college boys in their jersey uniforms posed before the camera, their smiles dazzling.

But Takao's eyes zeroed in on the image of a boy who was probably the only one who did not plaster a smile for the photo op. In fact, while the other boys posed with peace signs and Victory signs, this one guy had his arms crossed on his chest. He looked miserable. Since he was one of the taller ones, he was at the back with a few guys as tall as him.

Takao clutched the paper, putting it closer to his face. There was no one else whose scowl was more adorable than this green eyed young man who wore black rimmed glasses. It's him! My Shin-chan! Takao thought giddily then giggled like a four year old girl. Since when had he become his Shin-chan?

Wow. So he was in Keio University now, huh? That was pretty amazing. Not a lot of kids got admitted there because the entrance exam was a lot more difficult than average ones. Takao couldn't help but feel a swell of pride for the boy. He really really was something. And he was in the basketball team too!

Takao spent the remaining minutes of his break reading the article about the team. There was also a schedule there of the intercollegiate basketball matches. Takao took note of where the stadium was where the games would be held. It was only a thirty minute walk from here, and if he took the train it meant half the time. Or he could take a cab!

Takao was suddenly filled with a lightheadedness he didn't know was possible. How could the thought of seeing Shin-chan again after all these years bring him so much happiness that he had never had with the few men he had been in serious relationships with?

Besides, Takao swore he would only see Shin-chan to say hello, ask about his Mom and… probably just it. It would be senseless to rekindle the past. Shin-chan was already in college. And he was even more handsome and taller than Takao could remember! He could probably have his own pick of boys or girls now. Surely he wouldn't even look at an old man like Takao.

Takao smiled bitterly. Yeah, he was already thirty three, he had even found a few strands of white hair on his head. Midorima would probably speak to him, and say hello, too, just to be polite. But wouldn't look at him twice.

Takao kept the paper away and turned back to his computer. Maybe meeting up with Shin-chan wasn't such a good idea.

Takao's days passed by uneventfully. He still continued walking to the firm, while eating any packed bread he got from the convenience store. He still worked ten to twelve hour shifts.

And he still thought of Midorima every day.

In fact, he realized he hadn't picked up a guy for the last two months since he came here to Shinjuku, content on taking care of his own needs during the shower while the thought of green hair and green eyes filled his mind.

Wow. Story of his life.

One Saturday afternoon, as Takao lay on his bed, he began contemplating how boring his life was. Mondays through Fridays he was overworking. And during weekends he spent inside his condo, alone, either sleeping or watching TV. How duller could it get?

He wanted to check out Ni-chome, but he really didn't feel like spending so much time and money in a bar just to hook up with some random nameless stranger who might be crappy in bed anyway. As far as he knew the guys at the office were all straight, so there wasn't a chance to meet and date a colleague like Takeru or his other exes.

Takao glanced at his calendar. There were a few red marks in there. He had actually marked the days of Keio's basketball matches, just in case he was able to muster enough courage to watch one. Takao noticed there was a mark for today.

Takao closed his eyes, torn between wanting to just wallow in misery or watching the game. And yeah, it wasn't like he would be able to speak to Midorima anyway. He'd just watch from afar, see how he was doing, then be on his way. He could also go to the mall afterward. Yeah, it shouldn't be so hard.

It was now or never. Takao went into the bathroom to shower.

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Takao was astonished that the stadium was almost packed that afternoon. It was filled mostly of college girls cheering for their schools. Takao had to smile as he sat down on his seat. Young basketball hunks could really draw in a crowd of fan girls like flame could do to a moth. Takao looked around at the lively crowd. Teens and adults alike couldn't seem to keep still.

There. The match was just about to begin. One by one, the announcer announced the first five of the school Keio was playing against. They were wearing blue jersey.

Takao leaned down, placing both elbows on his knees. Keio's first five was up next. Maybe Midorima wouldn't be one of them; he was only a freshman anyway. Surely there were other guys more senior than him would be starters.

One by one the white wearing Keio players were introduced. When Midorima's name was called, Takao's head shot up so quick he felt a bit dizzy.

His heart was throbbing painfully in his chest as he watched the tall shooting guard jog across the court to his team, fierce determination etched on his face. Yup, he was indeed taller, and he looked even more toned, broader. He was the finest specimen of a man that Takao had ever seen. He asked himself again how he was able to let go of this person all these years.

The game started. Takao's eyes were so focused on Shin-chan's moves. Ever since the boy's middle school Takao had not even once seen him play. Well, that was because he was busy with work, of course. Midorima's had been both MVP both his junior and senior year, so Takao had expected that the boy must be talented.

He did not however expect, when Midorima was in the middle of playing, when he was in his element, no one could hold a candle to him. His shots never missed. He could turn formless shots to sure points. No one could get past his defense. He was indeed a total beast.

Takao couldn't believe how hard his heart was beating inside his chest. For one moment he wanted to do what the other girls were doing and scream his head off whenever Midorima scored a point. He looked so hot there, playing as if he owned the game himself. His arrogant, confident take-charge attitude was just getting into Takao so much that he felt like a schoolboy watching his biggest crush!

Takao's eyes never left Midorima's form all throughout the game. He could care less who won; he just couldn't take his eyes off the green haired basketball prodigy.

The crowd went wild when the last second ticked and the buzzer went off, conveying Keio's victory against their competitor.

All at once, the fans got down from the bleachers, to congratulate the boys who won and to ask for autographs and have their pictures be taken.

Takao didn't know what to do next. Should he also go down and congratulate Midorima? It was harmless, right? They used to be neighbors and – well, friends. For the life of him he didn't know how why he was so nervous! It was his Shin-chan, the boy who spent years pestering him and claiming his TV whenever he got the chance.

Takao found himself walking down the aisle, his vision filled with the most perfect view of Shin-chan.

"Midorima-kuuuuuuuuun!" girls screamed nonstop, crowding around the giant. They couldn't get enough of him. They took pictures, hugged his arms and pushed clothes and papers on his face, demanding for autographs.

Midorima looked helplessly clueless but he made an effort to sign all the things that he needed to. He just wouldn't smile at the cameras. That was something he wasn't willing to do.

Takao stopped descending the stairs and watched from afar, a sad smile on his lips. Heck, there was no way he could get through a sea of bodies like this anyway. Those girls looked murderous enough and they probably wouldn't let an old guy like him get too close to their star. Takao sighed. Yeah. This was where Shin-chan belonged. Surrounded by kids his age, adoring him. There was no place for an old man like him.

With one last glimpse, Takao put his hands on the pocket of his jeans and dejectedly went to the exit of the stadium.

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There was a small café beside the stadium. Since Takao was not in the mood to go anywhere, he just ordered some frappe coffee and waffles. He just sat there, eating his food and drinking his coffee, regretting for the first time all the harsh words he told Shin-chan in the past.

Maybe it was his ego. Because he just couldn't think of himself as someone who would hook up with a child, especially one he had seen grow up before his eyes. But then, Midorima proposed they wait, right? And Takao had flatly rejected him. Now why did he do that? He could have said yes.

Takao also didn't know. It was just probably a bit overwhelming that a young man like Shin-chan who had a lot in store for him would settle for an old guy like Takao. He was also afraid time would come and when they eventually fought within their relationship, they would break up and start hating each other. It was a stupid kind of worry, also baseless, and Takao realized, they did stop taking to each other since three years ago. Shin-chan probably still hated him.

But oh, how he missed that darling of a boy. Now, maybe he could be honest with himself. A long time had already passed. He should be man enough to admit that there was no one else he had a deeper connection with than Shin-chan. None of his old boyfriends could make him feel comfortable the way Shin-chan could, how they could stay side by side all evening without even saying a single word to each other.

He simply missed the companionship he had with Shin-chan.

Getting more and more depressed, Takao decided to just sleep it off. There was no point in picking up a guy now. He was not in the mood.

He got out of the café and was about to walk to the station when he noticed that there was a crowd formed by the gates of the stadium. He also saw a mini-bus with the official banner of Keio's basketball team. Takao's eyes widened. Before he realized it, he was almost at a half run towards the gates.

And true enough, the boys from Keio's basketball team were filing out of the stadium, about to board their bus. Takao's knees were shaking as he stood with the crowd.

He watched as one by one the boys got out. Some even stopped to have their pictures taken with the fans.

Midorima walked out, intending to get to the bus as soon as possible.

Screaming girls were everywhere, though it wasn't a wild crowd. Takao shouted the very first word he could think of.

"SHIN-CHAN!"

Suddenly, Midorima's head glanced around, trying to find where the voice came from.

Takao yelled again, "Shin-chan!"

Finally green eyes landed on Takao's dark ones. A shock so deep registered in Shin-chan's face, and his lips fell into a small O. Takao smiled dazzlingly and waved.

Midorima immediately walked over to him, ignoring a throng of fans on his way. When he was a few feet away from Takao he asked, as if in awe, "What are you doing here?"

"I came to watch you play. You were – uhh – amazing… yeah… How did you learn to play like that?" Takao scratched the back of his head nervously as he stuttered.

Amidst all the noise around them, Takao felt like they were alone in the street. Midorima also seemed tongue-tied. They just stood there, awkwardly, staring at each other.

"Takao – "

"Midorima, let's go!" the coach called out, perched on the steps of the bus.

Midorima looked in a quandary. Takao understood the situation and nodded his head. "Hey, you have to go now," he said gently.

"Takao, wait. I –"

"It's alright. I'll – uhm – probably watch your other game when I have the chance."

"But where are you staying?" Shin-chan asked, walking closer to him.

"At the – "

"Midorima, c'mon, the boys are waiting!" the coach yelled out. It looked like all the players were inside the bus now.

"Go ahead. I'll see you again, okay? I know you're busy. You're practically a star now," Takao teased. "Bye."

Waving, Takao bowed his head slightly, backed up a few steps and turned around.

Damn it! Takao gritted his teeth. How lame was that reunion? He couldn't even spend one minute with Shin-chan without the whole universe complaining about it!

Midorima watched Takao's retreating back and headed for the bus.

"Who's that fellow? What's taking you so long?" Coach asked.

Midorima bowed his head. "Please go on without me."

"Huh?"

"I'll see you at practice on Monday, Coach!" Shin-chan declared forcefully and ran off.

"Hey, wait!"

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Takao's head was bowed low, watching his feet take each step as he walked. That was really pathetic. Shin-chan was pretty much occupied now. It wasn't like in the past when Midorima could hang around him all the time. He should have been prepared for this. It was just by sheer coincidence that Takao was able to speak to the star player.

Takao sighed, his chin almost touching his chest.

He yelped when a heavy arm hooked around his shoulder and squeezed. When Takao looked up, it was to the most beautiful shade of emerald he had ever seen in his life. "Shi- Shin-chan?"

Midorima didn't seem to be aware that a lot of people passing by the street turned to gawk at them. Neither did he seem to care. Shin-chan kept his arm around Takao and bent a little, until his nose almost touched the smaller man's forehead. "Takao."

"Yeah?" Takao croaked, suddenly hot and tingling all over.

"My feelings never changed," Midorima blurted out in that solemn manner of his that by in itself was infuriating in its calmness.

Takao didn't know if he would laugh or snap at the maddening child. "What?"

"Your answer? Is it still the same?" Shin-chan demanded. "Did you only come here to tour the city or did you want to see me?"

Takao couldn't help but laugh finally. He almost forgot how blunt Midorima could be when he needed to know something. His honesty was so refreshing for once Takao decided never to lie again to the boy. "Hmm, let's see," he teased, eyes twinkling. "How old are you again?"

Midorima's breath caught. "I'll be nineteen in six months."

"Stupid, just say you're eighteen, then."

Midorima frowned. "Fine. I'm eighteen and a half."

Takao knew he looked silly but he couldn't stop smiling. "Aaah - I guess that's a good enough bargain."

The boy stopped pretending to act cool and collected. Breathing a sigh of relief, he completely wrapped both arms around Takao and hugged him, in the middle of the sidewalk, where passersby could see.

Takao was horrified. "What the fuck are you doing you overgrown beast?"

Midorima even buried his face on the top of Takao's hair. "If you quit struggling then people would think it's no big deal."

"No big deal? We're having PDA in the middle of the street!" Takao groaned, fighting to get away.

Midorima grunted and pulled away, looking down at the smaller man whose cheeks were already tainted with red. "Come with me."

"Huh? Where?"

Suddenly Midorima grinned, a heart stopping smile that nearly left Takao in a coma where he stood. "You ask a lotta questions, Mister."

Takao grinned back, remembering how annoyed Shin-chan had sounded as a child.

Midorima half dragged him to the train station.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Once they got off the train, Midorima hailed a taxi. The train car was crowded with people so they really weren't able to have a decent conversation. Takao told him that he lived here now because he was assigned to a branch in the city. Midorima looked extremely glad about it.

Inside the taxi, Midorima rattled off instructions to the driver.

"Where are we going?" Takao asked, curious.

"To our house."

"I see," Takao said, hoping his voice didn't show the nervousness he felt. "Is Kazumi there? It'll be wonderful to see her. And Tanaka-san, too."

"No. They're away on a trip."

"Oh."

"We'll be alone."

"Oh."

Takao looked out the window, his heart racing again. The thought of being alone with the boy sent a delicious heat to spread over his skin, going straight to his groin, and he raised one knee higher, hoping to hide the erection that suddenly popped.

He glanced at Midorima who was also looking out the window on his side. He looked calm enough but his hand kept on clenching and unclenching on the seat between them. A warm fuzzy feeling enveloped Takao. Shin-chan was equally flustered by this meeting.

Takao reached down and covered Midoriman's big hand on the seat. Shin-chan flinched and turned down to him, earning another soft smile from the older man. Takao squeezed on Shin-chan's fingers. Wordlessly, the boy tangled their fingers together; as they continued to lovingly look at one another, feeling like they were in their own universe.

Midorima unlocked the gate of the big house. Takao looked around, impressed with how big Tanaka-san's residence was. "Come in," Shin-chan said, leading the way.

Takao followed the young man into the house, his cheeks burning. He had just given his consent about hooking up with Shin-chan, right? So the next natural step would be to have sex. He knew that and he was going crazy in anticipation. Or maybe Shin-chan just wanted to talk, reminisce the past and just hang out. Like old times. Whatever Midorima wanted, Takao knew he would oblige. It was the least he could do. If in case they did have sex and both of them realized it was really no biggie after all, that a onetime sex would cure their obsession with one another, then so be it. They were both men. Takao hated the fact of Shin-chan losing interest in him but he should suck it up and move on. He would abide by anything that Shin-chan wanted.

Takao's mind was running a mile a minute. He was just so nervous all of a sudden! For three years he missed the boy, pined for him like the lover he had had and lost that now when he was face to face with the possibility of having sex with him, Takao was scared out of his wits! What if Shin-chan laughed at his middle aged body? Or at the few strands of white hair on his head? Or the fact that his skin wasn't as smooth as it had been in the past?

What if –

Shin-chan opened the front door and went in. Takao left his shoes on the entrance and wore one of the pairs of slippers meant for visitors.

Wow, it was a nice looking house, very Westernized, from the sofa, to the center piece and paintings. Even the huge flat screen TV on the wall looked so high end and modern.

Takao commented, "Your place looks awesome, Shin-chan!"

The child was already opening the fridge by the kitchen. "We have tea, but nothing's prepared yet. How about a canned fruit drink?" he asked.

"Whatever you have!" Takao answered, still looking around. The Living room alone was almost as big as his whole pad.

"Here," Shin-chan said, giving the can of juice to Takao.

Takao accepted it with a smile but did not open it, instead put it down on the center table. "I'll drink it later."

"Hn."

Both of them stood in the middle of the Living room, awkwardly, unable to meet each other's eyes for so long.

"Hey," Takao started in a playful tone, hoping to break the ice. "You never even once visited me. Three years, Shin-chan."

Midorima put both hands on his pocket, tapping his foot. He looked a bit unsure of what to say. "I was – uhhh – still so angry that time."

Takao's face fell. "Oh."

"I thought if I visited, and you drive me away… I wouldn't know how I could handle it." The child let out a deep sigh. "Then I began thinking about it. And I – thought you were right. I was being selfish. I thought maybe, once I graduated from college I'd come home and you know – try again. If I already had a degree, maybe you wouldn't push me away."

Takao was so touched it took everything in him not to pull the boy and kiss him until he couldn't breathe. "Baby, that is really sweet of you," he finally said, breathlessly.

The giant nodded slightly. "I realized people would have judged you more than they would do me. And I knew I couldn't do that to you so I –"

"But still, Shin-chan. I mean, if you had visited, you know – as a friend, that wouldn't have been too bad. I could handle that," Takao argued, a bit of hurt in his voice.

Midorima cocked his head to one side, looking very. "That's easy for you to say. I wouldn't have – " He paused, sighing again.

"Wouldn't have what?"

The young man still wouldn't look at him. "You wouldn't understand."

"What?" Takao nagged.

Shin-chan mumbled, "If I had visited, that meant me spending the night over, right? I kept thinking, I wouldn't have – uhhh – been able to keep my hands to myself and you might hate me more. I hate staying in that small apartment with you while I wasn't even allowed to touch! It was – hard."

Takao was shocked for a second, and then a small smile crept into his lips. Right there and then he made up his mind. There could never be anyone for him except for Shin-chan. His blood was practically humming the boy's name as it sizzled with every part of his being.

Mischievously, Takao stepped closer, and closer to Midorima until they were just an inch apart. The young man looked down at him curiously. "Hmmm?"

"So… You wouldn't be able to keep your hands away?" Takao practically purred, batting his eyelashes at the giant. Midorima's mouth suddenly felt dry and he could hear his heartbeat thundering in his own chest. Takao reached and grabbed the front of his uniform jacket. "Like this?"

With a tug, Takao pulled down Midorima by his jacket, effectively sealing their mouths together. Midorima had to gasp, startled. Takao smiled into the kiss, opening his mouth so that his tongue could snake into Shin-chan's slightly opened mouth too.

When their tongues touched, it was like heaven. Takao didn't hide the fact that he was hard under his pants and he even ground his erection against Midorima's thigh. Shin-chan wrapped his big strong arms around the smaller quivering body, also pressing his hardness onto Takao's stomach. They kissed frantically, swapping saliva, their breaths mingling, as they ground their groins against each other.

It felt so liberating for Takao. Now he could admit that Shin-chan was right. Takao knew if he had been more honest, he could also have made a promise to wait. Shin-chan was definitely worth it and more. But now was not the time for regrets. He would show Shin-chan the best time of his life.

Laughing, Takao nipped the young man's lower lip playfully, his arms around Shin-chan's neck, drawing him closer. He murmured against Midorima's lips, "Damn. I'm gonna have a crick on my neck looking up at you all the time."

Shin-chan grinned evilly. "You can be on top."

And with that, Shin-chan fell onto the soft plush sofa, pulling Takao to straddle his lap. Takao went willingly, rubbing his ass against the hardness inside Shin-chan's pants. They continued kissing feverishly and Takao uncontrollably moaned, while Shin-chan's large hands held him by his hip and thrust his erection onto his ass. The friction was just maddening.

"Fuck!" Takao swore and he immediately scrambled away from Shin-chan's lap, coming down to kneel between his long legs.

"T-Takao…" Shin-chan said breathlessly.

"Damn, I wanna suck your brains out," Takao exclaimed with a giggle. Wasting no time, he pulled down Shin-chan's pants and underwear, exposing the thick red angry cock which was already leaking at the tip. Midorima flinched as cold air hit his bare skin.

Takao made a lecherous expression as if he couldn't wait to devour his favorite treat. He immediately swallowed the lovely appendage into his mouth, stopping halfway to the base, its tip nudging his throat.

Takao moaned at the wonderful taste of it.

Shin-chan hissed, closing his eyes and dropping his head on the sofa.

Takao sucked onto Shin-chan's cock with wild abandon, tonguing the tip before he moved down to deep throat him. His fingers dug onto Shin-chan's thighs.

Midorima's hands reached out to bury in Takao's black locks, pushing and pulling, trying to get the right rhythm. Takao hummed around his cock and Shin-chan grunted, pleasure wracking his whole body. With half lidded eyes behind his glasses, he looked down at the private display for him.

Like a porn star, Takao stared directly at the gasping boy, making a show of how he sucked on his cock, hollowing his cheeks. His tongue lapped at the length of it and he smirked as his mouth descended to take one of Shin-chan's balls, swallowing and sucking on it gently.

Midorima though he was going to go out of his mind. The scene was just so erotic it was driving him crazy. Takao, no matter how friendly and approachable he was, had always acted decorously towards him all those years they had been neighbors. Shin-chan had no idea how fucking sexy he was when he was being a cocktease like this.

Winking, Takao moved onto his cock again, his tongue lavishing special attention to the underside. When he took it in his mouth again and his head bobbed up and down, sucking gently but firmly, Midorima felt his release fast approaching. It started from his balls, shooting upward until he couldn't almost take the torturous pleasure.

He yanked Takao's hair lightly, moving him away. "I'm – I'm coming…"

Takao fought against his hold and grinned. "That's the idea, baby."

Stunned, Midorima could only watch as Takao swallowed his length again, closing his eyes as if he was really enjoying what he was doing. Takao held onto the base and pumped vigorously. "Yeah, love, come for me."

Pressing the back of his head onto the sofa, Midorima squeezed his eyes shut and gasped as he came hard, into Takao's hot mouth. Takao pressed his head even lower, his forehead touching Shin-chan's belly as he slurped down the salty white cum.

He swallowed everything, that Shin-chan could see. And he didn't know if he would be horrified or ecstatic for Takao doing that. Catching his breath for a few seconds, he watched as Takao continued on lapping at his cock as if he could never get enough of it.

"Takao…"

"Hmmm?"

"I – Thanks," Shin-chan managed to get out, blushing.

Takao giggled, his tongue swirling at the pink tip of the young man's cock. His hand was still tugging at it. "Uh huh. Don't thank me yet. We're not done here."

Midorima's eyes glazed with lust. "Yeah?"

Tako stood abruptly. "I wanna do this on a bed. Where's your room?" he asked nonchalantly.

"Up – upstairs," Shin-chan replied.

"Alright. Let's go, then." Like an excited kid who was going to an amusement park, Takao ran towards the stairs, his butt bouncing gracefully inside his snug fitting jeans. Midorima's hands itched to squeeze the perfectly shaped taut globes.

Takao winked at him over his shoulder. "Come on, slowpoke."

Takao made a ruckus of ascending the stairs laughing. Midorima pulled up his pants and followed, a smile on his lips.

On the hallway of the second floor, Takao stopped, looking around. Midorima appeared, watching him. "Where's your room?"

Midorima didn't answer, instead, leaned down and wrapped his arms around Takao's knees, pulling him up and tossing him over his shoulder. Takao yelped in surprise, as he came upside down, his face slamming into Shin-chan's broad back. Chuckling, Shin-chan even slapped the exposed ass by his shoulder. "I've always wanted to do this," he said, laughter in his voice.

"Hmph!" Takao snorted. "You could have carried me bridal style, you know."

"No. That's way too girly," Shin-chan answered, walking towards his door.

He opened it and got in, while Takao's body dangled on his back. Midorima unceremoniously dumped him on the soft bed, highly amused.

Even Takao couldn't stop laughing. And when Midorima got on the bed, on top of Takao's body, they were still snickering like a pair of idiots.

Takao impatiently moved his hands underneath the boy's jacket, pinching at Midorima's nipples. Shin-chan hissed in pleasure and ravished the older man's mouth, his weight all over Takao.

Takao growled, and untangled himself only to take the jacket off the young man. Then his shirt. Then his pants. Midorima helped in undressing. Takao frantically pulled his own shirt off of him and immediately shucked his pants, but snatched his wallet first and got a wrapped condom from inside.

Midorima licked his lip at the sight of Takao's own hard on, slightly smaller than his own but it was curved and thinner, prettier. Midorima also had the sudden urge to taste it.

But Takao was not in the mood for any more foreplay. Tossing the wallet aside, Takao shoved the condom to Shin-chan's face. "Hurry. Do you have lotion or hand gel to make it easier?"

"Uhhh – " Midorima looked at his night stand. He was reaching out for it when Takao asked again.

"You've done this before right?"

Midorima suddenly looked guilty, afraid Takao would be offended that yes, he had once experienced having sex with another man. Takao probably read the answer in his face so he caressed the young man's cheek gently. "Don't look like that, hon. It's alright. It's actually better so at least you have an idea what to do."

Midorima nodded, relieved. He reached out for a small bottle of lube from his nightstand drawer. Takao was impressed. "Wow. So you've been bringing home guys, huh? You look prepared."

"No!" Midorima countered, shaking his head. "It's for me – when I – uhhh – "

Takao snickered. "When you jerk off by yourself?"

"Yeah," Shin-chan replied quietly. "I've never – brought home any guy here in my room."

"Oh. So I'm the first, huh? What? You've never liked any guy enough to bring them here?" Takao teased, his eyes twinkling with delight.

Midorima snorted and bluntly answered, "It's not like I'm in love with any of them like I'm in love with you."

Despite Takao being the aggressor here, and the more experienced, his cheeks reddened like an untrained virgin when he heard the boy's heartfelt, albeit somewhat unpolished confession. He reached for the boy, kissing him lovingly, hoping all his emotions poured off to that kiss. "Shin-chan…"

"Hmmm?"

"Fuck me hard. I want your cock in my ass. Now," Takao demanded.

Midorima froze for a second and then he was kissing Takao forcefully, pinning him down to the bed, his weight all over him that Takao almost couldn't breathe. But he loved every second of it! Groaning, he pushed at Shin-chan and rolled over onto his knees and elbows. He was slightly shaking from anticipation.

Midorima gazed at the pale ass presented to him, the pink butt hole clenching and unclenching in such an adorable way.

Takao was already grumbling. "Stop staring at my ass and start fucking it!" he complained unabashedly. "The condom! Put it on, Shin-chan!"

"Y-yes!" Shin-chan tore off the wrapper and rolled the condom onto his painfully erect shaft. He then poured a generous amount of lube into his hand and pumped onto his length, making sure it was wet and covered. "Isn't this too soon? Let me finger you –"

"No!" Takao snapped, his other hand already pumping at his own cock. "Just do it! It'll be okay in a while."

Midorima moved closer and positioned his thick angry cock at the entrance of Takao's opening. He was about to push forward when he growled and moved back.

Takao looked behind his shoulder, scowling. "What the fuck's taking you so long, Shin-"

"Sssshhh… I wanna try something. I've never done this before," Midorima replied, grabbing Takao's hip and pulling his ass even higher. To Takao's shock, he felt Shin-chan's big hands part his ass cheeks and his hot tongue delved inside.

"Shin-chaaaaann!" Takao cried out, arching his back. "Fuck, Shin-chan!"

Midorima pushed his face deeper into Takao's ass, biting at the cheeks, sucking at the pink little hole. His tongue snaked out and licked the rosebud forcefully. He even hardened his tongue and tried to pierce through the hole, his fingers digging deep into Takao's cheeks for purchase.

Takao was thrashing before him, his toes curling at the sweet sensations Shin-chan's hot talented tongue was causing his insides. "Shin-chan, please… Please… Fucking fuck me now, dammit!"

Getting up, Midorima wiped at his mouth. "Okay."

Roughly, he hauled Takao's ass over and pushed the tip of his cock inside, trying to be careful. As soon as he got through the first ring of muscle squeezing him tight, Midorima panted. It felt so damn good being enfolded like this inside Takao's tight wet heat. Midorima groaned, trying to catch his breath as he pushed forward.

Takao moaned uncontrollably, relaxing his muscles so that he could accept the young man's impressive girth inside. At last Shin-chan was fully sheathed inside. They breathed a sigh of relief in unison.

Holding onto both sides of Takao's hip, Midorima started moving. In and out. Thrust thrust thrust. Slowly. Gently.

Takao was having none of that. He moved his ass back and forth as well, slamming into Shin-chan forcefully. Midorima gripped his hip. "S-stop moving… I'm trying to –"

"Shut up and fuck me like you mean it, Shin-chan!"

Midorima gritted his teeth, speeding up until he was slamming into Takao roughly. Takao cried out in bliss, continuously pumping at his own cock. "Faster, Shin-chan! Faster!"

"Y-yeah…"

They fucked wildly, and Takao was crying out so loud Midorima thought his ears would ring for days. He pulled back and flipped Takao onto his back, loving the look of pleasure in the older man's face. He entered Takao again, spreading his thighs wide with his big hands. Takao's eyes were squeezed shut, his brows furrowed in concentration. He breathed hard through his mouth. He looked completely hot.

Midorima lowered his body until there was no space between them. Takao wrapped his legs around Shin-chan's hips, his one hand coming around his neck while the other one was still stroking his own cock.

Midorima continued thrusting home, glad that he was able to come earlier so he could last longer during the second round. He dipped his head and kissed Takao's mouth, sucking at his tongue.

"I'm almost – " Takao said against the kiss.

"Mmm hmmm…"

Takao threw his head back, arched his back and squeezed at his shaft painfully, gasping as jets of white hot cum landed on his stomach. Midorima smiled and kissed him languidly.

Then he got up and sat on his knees, taking both Takao's ankles and wrapped them around his neck. He watched as Takao rode out the last of his orgasm and he thrust harder into Takao, repeatedly.

Takao groaned, smiling as he watched Midorima watching him and a look of heat – of love passed between them that it was enough to send Midorima over the edge. He pulled out and removed the condom, tugged at his erect member and came on Takao's belly as well, all the while Takao's hands were stroking the side of his thighs.

"Shit, you're beautiful when you come, Shin-chan," Takao said in wonder.

Midorima was still looming over him, panting hard as he squeezed at his shaft. When he had milked himself dry, he sat on his butt, still wheezing and looked down at the man lying on his bed. "Not nearly as you are, Takao."

Takao giggled and reached up so they could kiss again. After a while, when they were both calmer, Takao lay back down. "Now I'm covered in spunk. Times two."

"Let me get a cloth."

Shin-chan dutifully got a cloth and cleaned them both up. And afterward they cuddled.

Takao hadn't felt as peaceful like this in a while. He had had serious boyfriends but not even once did he feel this content, lying wrapped in the arms of his lover. No matter how serious or committed Takao would be with a guy, he had never thought it may end up in a really permanent union in the future. He was stingy with his space, that was why he also seldom brought lovers into his old apartment.

But with Shin-chan, it just felt so right. If Shin-chan even proposed they moved in together, no matter how crazy it sounded like, Takao knew he would agree without batting an eyelash. Besides, he grudgingly admitted that Shin-chan was of age now, and if Takao had to fight other people's judgment of him, then that meant Shin-chan really meant that much for him to make the effort.

Takao realized at this point, and not just because of the after sex euphoria, he realized he didn't want to care anymore what other people would think. Let them call him a cradle snatcher or whatever, as long as Takao knew what the real score was between him and Midorima, he could care less.

As long as Shin-chan wanted him, he would stay by his side.

No more denying these feelings. He had spent so many years doing so and in the end, he only felt depressed rather than pleased with the decision.

"What are you thinking?" Midorima whispered,gently caressing Takao' head.

"Hmmmm…" Takao, sated, burrowed deeper into the embrace, hugging Shin-chan more tightly. "Nothing. I'm just happy we finally hooked up."

Shin-chan snorted. "Took you long enough to realize that."

Takao slapped his arm lightly. "Don't start. We're never gonna hear the end of it. Everything that happened in the past, let's leave it there and just move on from here."

"Fine."

"How we're going to tell your Mom, that's the big issue."

"One step at a time. No one's in a hurry here."

"I guess you're right. We might wait until you get older and – I'm pretty sure we agree this is not going to be a onetime thing, given our history and all. But I want to request that we be discreet about it. Is that okay with you?" Takao asked.

Midorima nodded. "You're right. There's no sense in broadcasting it when it's more harm than good."

"Spoken like a true adult. Hey, what are you taking up in college anyway?"

"Medicine."

"Woooow! Really?" Takao's eyes widened. "You're taking up Medicine?"

"Didn't you hear me the first time?" Midorima shot back, his eyes crinkling in amusement. Takao rolled his eyes at him.

"So you wanna be a doctor?"

Midorima shrugged. "Tanaka-san suggested it, saying I can probably handle it, being so brainy and all. Yeah, it's doing well. My grades are acceptable."

Takao made a face. "And by acceptable you mean top notch."

"My parents aren't complaining," Shin-chan said, a bit of smugness in his tone.

Takao rolled on top of him, resting his chin on Midorima's chest. They looked eye to eye, as Shin-chan's big hands ran up and down the smaller man's back. "You're really amazing, huh, Shin-chan?"

"Everyone can take up medicine when they put their mind into it. It's no big deal."

"But you're also a starter in the basketball team. That's simply awesome how you divide your time – "

"You multitask. That's all."

Takao sighed, kissing the skin on the young man's chest. "That was what I had been afraid of in the past, you know? I mean, just a little. That you may not be ready for a relationship yet, that you had a lot of things going on and spending time with an old geezer like me would distract you from reaching your goals and –"

Midorima silenced him with a finger to his lips. "I appreciate your concern for me. You may be right in that aspect. Or you may be wrong, since I know myself and I'm sure whatever we could have had was not going to distract me from studying. But all the same, thank you for worrying about me."

Takao smiled brightly, feeling like a weight was lifted from his shoulder. He would never ever ever let go of Shin-chan. Now and forever.

He reached up and wrapped his arms around the boy's neck, dipping his head for a kiss. It started as simple one, but then the way they were rubbing against each other, it only took a few seconds before they were both hard and aching again.

Grinning, Takao reached behind him for Shin-chan's cock. "So, Doctor Shin-chan," he purred, stroking the massive erection of the boy. "Would you like to give me an injection?"

Midorima hissed, "Hell yeah."

Takao rubbed his ass against the solid length, loving the friction their skins were creating. Then he suddenly froze.

"What?" Midorima gasped.

"I only have one condom!" Takao exclaimed, panicking. "Please tell me you have one! A boy like you has to have condom in time for emergency, right?"

Midorima slowly shook his head.

Takao was horrified. "What? Why don't you have one? Don't tell me you practice in unsafe sex with guys you –"

Midorima rolled his eyes. "I never thought of needing one."

"What? But you said this isn't your first time!"

"Well – yeah… This is actually my second time."

Takao's mouth hung open, amazed at what he heard. Shin-chan was squirming under him. "So you don't – I mean – you've never had sex when any guy that you like?"

"I've never liked any guy. I mean, aside from you. It just – The thought of doing some gay classmate just doesn't excite me that much. Most of them are too girly for my tastes."

Takao blinked. "Okay. So who was the first guy who popped your cherry?"

Midorima glared at him. "Pop your cherry, my ass."

"Who was it?"

"My – uhhmm – Math teacher. In high school."

"Huh? Whaaat?"

"It was his last day of teaching 'coz he was being transferred to a different district. He came on to me and said he had – you know – been watching me for some time. He asked me if I could let him… you know… do that. And yeah – I said yes."

Takao sat on his knees above Shin-chan, crossing his arms, looking pissed like hell. "So that's it!? I fought so hard to protect your virtue and you fall into bed with the first guy who – Wait! Your Math teacher? How old was he?"

"Around your age."

"You mean he's old," Takao commented dryly.

"You're the only one who's always putting emphasis on age anyway. He was just a guy who wanted to be fucked so I fucked him," Shin-chan retorted.

Takao was still pissed. But then he grinned. "You really have an oyaji fetish, don't you?"

"Shut up, Takao."

"But you love old men. Admit it!"

In a quiet voice Shin-chan said, "He looked a bit like you. He wasn't also girly. I fucked him twice thinking of you the whole time. Afterward I thought sex wasn't that bad, but it just didn't excite me that much."

"And now? Does it excite you?" Takao asked, touched that all this time Midoima had never really forgotten him. How could he not love this boy so much?

Midorima thrust his groin at Takao. "I'm sure you can see it does."

Takao braced himself with two hands, looming over the painfully honest boy. "I wish we could fuck again."

"Do we really need a condom? I've never been with anyone since my teacher."

Takao looked confused for a while. "I've never had unprotected sex since like – forever. I don't know how –"

Midorima held onto him. "Then that means it's okay. We're both clean."

"But that's irresponsible!"

"No, it's called bareback," Midorima replied, grinning.

"Shit, you're still a smart ass through and through," Takao snapped but he was already straddling Midorima, reaching for the lube. "The things I do for love!" he wailed, although there was a twinkle in his eyes.

Midorima smirked and pulled down Takao for a kiss.

Takao reached behind him and covered Midorima's cock with lube. He also reached into the rim of his ass to apply the water-based liquid onto his hole.

Planting both knees on each side of Shin-chan's hips, Takao rose and positioned himself on top of the boy's cock, impaling himself slowly, wincing at the slight sting, but feeling amazed for the first time at how good the friction unbelievably felt. Shin-chan's skin was so hot. So good.

Midorima could very well appreciate the beautiful view of Takao's body displayed in front of him, his twitching cock jutting forward. Midorima reached out and closed his hand around Takao's shaft, as Takao found his up and down rhythm on Shin-chan's own length.

Soon they were screwing like crazy, the bed creaking with the weight of two grown up men bouncing up and down.

Takao rode Shin-chan's cock wildly; throwing his head back reaching behind for the boy's bent knees for support. Midorima held him by the hip with one hand, groaning and grunting at how good it felt.

Takao screamed as he came hard, while Midorima milked him dry. It took only another minute before Midorima followed suit, coming deep in Takao's ass.

Takao fell onto Midorima like a ragdoll, trying to catch his breath and failing. He could hear the thunderous roar of Shin-chan's heartbeat under his ear. "I love you, Shin-chan," he mumbled sleepily, tiredly.

"As you should, old man," Midorima answered, chuckling. That earned him a slap on his arm.

Afterward they slept like that, with Takao sprawled over him. Before Takao completely lost consciousness he thought finally, he'd never be alone anymore. Never again.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Gaaah. Finally. I hope you like it. The sex scenes are not that detailed I know, but I still hope you like it. Mwah! Thanks everyone.