"God gave us memory so that we might have roses in December." ~James M. Barrie

Chapter 5: J'adore Les Souvenirs Heureux

"It was a Hollow."

I nearly choked on the tea.

We sat in a fairly small room barely big enough for a decent amount of seating space. It was more like a closet, though the men outside had insisted I refer to it as the "interrogation" room. The interior wasn't exactly what you'd expect from one, but I wasn't complaining. Contradictory to the name, the room actually possessed a cozy quality created by its close quarters and gentle burning fireplace that evoked in me a sense of drowsiness. Although I was sure that a fire in such a tiny space was no doubt hazardous, I wasn't too concerned. By no means was it uncomfortably close inside the room, but the occupation limit was probably only five, six bodies max. Two wooden benches and a desk were the only furniture that the room could allow.

To my right was a small window that exposed the outside view. During the day, the suns tame fire could be seen pefectly through the glass as its glowing flames licked the canvas of the sky, but now, all that could be seen were the thick shadows of autumns late evening. The window was up, and a light breeze whistled past it. The mild current guided her swaying hair, causing her to push the stray locks behind her ear- you know, the way girls do. I could paint her picture perfect, there's no doubt in my mind. She had delicate hands that could sprinkle snowflakes from the heavens, hair that flowed smoother than the most graceful fountain, and eyes that looked like they could see the world through violet, even though I knew they couldn't. It was just me, her, the wind, and a crackling fire. Just like it used to be.

"It has the ability to steal the powers of a Soul Reaper, you'd best believe it. It's a high level threat. Definitely nothing to take lightly."

Her words drew me back to reality, though I wished they hadn't. Reality was all too...unforgiving. I didn't need anyone to tell me that. I had learned the hard way. Right now, all I needed to do was get to the bottom of the present situation without making it too difficult for myself.

"Okay, so...explain it again. This is the last time, promise."

Rukia sighed and huddled into the silk blue blanket draped over her t-shirt clad shoulders as she explained the incident to me once more. I sat back.

"I was out patrolling the streets for any strange activity. It was around eleven at the time, and for the most part everything seemed to be in order, as far as the World of the Living goes. I had been walking undisturbed until I noticed a figure trailing behind me. It was following a few steps back, most likely in attempt to conceal itself until it was ready to attack. At first I acted like I didn't notice it, remaining as unfazed as I possibly could. But as I approached a corner, I readied my hand on Sode no Shirayuki's hilt and turned. It wasn't what I was expecting. The figure that came down the walkway looked like just a regular human being, at first. That's why I had felt comfortable enough to let my guard down. It was a trustworthy looking girl, but when I saw her eyes, they were dilated and empty. Almost...hollow." I raised my hand to stop her.

"First of all, that was a painfully cheesy pun." She arched an eyebrow and shot me daggers. I shrugged. "Just sayin'. So anyway, I suppose it's safe to assume that this Hollow can disguise itself as someone that it's not. Like a chameleon, or shapeshifter."

"Thats the only possible explanation. Otherwise, it wouldn't have been able to disguise itself as a human." She fiddled nervously with a piece of lint on the desk as she continued.

"As she approached, she smiled, but it wasn't an innocent little smile, that's for sure. It was unsettling, and it hit a switch in my brain that said to run, but my damn feet wouldn't listen. This girl was supposedly a human, after all, so she shouldn't of been able to see me, let alone smile at me the way she did. I could tell by the way she moved closer that something was off. I tried to reach for my sword, but the muscles in my arm were frozen like stone. I couldn't move, my body felt stuck, and no matter how much strength I put into moving my feet, they wouldn't budge. An unpleasant gust of wind slammed against me and it chilled my body like an icy dagger that numbed all feeling to my limbs with its frigid blade. By now, I knew something was wrong, but it was too late. As she came closer, she stuck her hand out with that same crooked smile on her face. She was reaching for my neck, and I was sure she would grab it. But I was mistaken. Her hand, i-it fazed through my body, like the way ghosts do in those tasteless human movies. I watched in stunned fear as her flesh dissolved into my own. At first it seemed like she was reaching past me, and my body just happened to be in the way. But you see, she wasn't, she was reaching inside of me. First it was her hand, then it was her arm, and then her whole body. The sensation was horrible, and my throat was parched to the point where I thought I'd choke on the sheer dryness of the air. She had inhabited me, and it felt like an extreme invasion of privacy. I could feel the warmth spreading through my legs and arms again, but I couldn't celebrate it too much, because thats when my hands began to move, and not on my own accord. She, I mean, it, could control me now. With all my heart, I had wished it was just a dream. But that was foolish of me to wish such a thing. It, or I suppose, I, drew my sword from the sheath, oblivious to what the monster had planned. But when I saw my own two hands break the silver blade of my sword in half, that was the last thing I was expecting." She was staring down at her palms, and her purple pupils were clouded over. "The way it operates, it's cruel. It takes over your body, and then forces you to do the one thing you'd never do."

I exhaled heavily. I guess things were going to be difficult after all. Rukia rose her head and spoke again, adjusting the blanket around her.

"To add to the complexity of it all, the Hollow had the ability to jump from person to person, like a virus. I know, because only seconds after it had forced me to break my own sword, I felt it leave. I could suddenly breathe again, like its weight was lifted off of me. I blacked out after that, but I did manage to catch a glimpse of the creature as it left: it had shed from the human body, and now took the shape of a dark monster with a Hollow mask. Stranger still, it doesn't seem to have any sort of interest in souls."

Since when was that possible?

"But Rukia, that doesn't make any -"

"Think about it Renji! Tell me you're not that dense." She snapped at me, and I shut my mouth. "It doesn't want souls, otherwise it would've taken mine when it had the chance. It only seemed to want to destroy my blade. And, much as I hate to admit it, it succeeded."

I lifted an eyebrow. "So? The Hollow broke your sword. It'll heal itself after a while, you know that."

Rukia shook her head feircely, and when she spoke, I thought I heard an unsteady shaking in her voice. "In regular cases, yes. Usually, after ones Zanpakuto has been damaged, the blade can simply mend itself over a short period of time. But this is no regular case, Renji. You have no idea how helpless I felt when I came to and saw my shattered Zanpakuto lying at my side. I hid out in the World of the Living for two months, waiting for my powers to come back. But they never did. Thats why I couldn't return to the Soul Society. Becuase my sword was destroyed, I couldn't use it as a key to the Senkaimon. The powers, they were supposed to come back by now. Renji, do you believe in the idea of a Hollow being able to take a Shinigami's powers permenantly? Sode no Shirayuki is still broken. I'm afraid that it's..."

She choked on the last part. The realization of her sword being lost forever, along with her powers; that kind of realization could shatter the ground, and send you into a self-induced, never ending fall through darkness. Rukia didn't deserve that. She didn't deserve to lose all her hard work as a Shinigami. That Hollow had played her, like she was some puppet in its cruel joke, and the destruction of her powers was the punch line. It was all Central 46's fault for sending her on that mission to the World of the Living in the first place. If it hadn't been for that one, stupid missison, she wouldn't have to worry about the loss of her Zanpakuto. We'd be celebrating my promotion, if it hadn't been for that mission. We'd both be laughing away this perfect autumn night, if not for that lousy, pointless mission. Funny, how stuff worked like that...Actually, no. Never mind. It wasn't funny at all. I leaned over on the bench, and finished her sentence for her.

"Gone. Your afraid you powers are gone. I'm afraid too, Rukia. But if they're truly gone, what will you do?"

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, and regained her composure. She straightened her back and put on a face without sadness or fear or any of the emotions she'd just been displaying only seconds earlier. Rukia had her moments sometimes, but overall, she was tough, the real deal. Just like her brother.

"Well, I'll be removed from the Thirteen Court Gaurd Squads, that's for sure. It can't be helped. I suppose it'll be fine though, as I'll still be able to stay in the Kuchiki Manor. At least I won't have to go back to that place."

Two words. Two words were all it took for me to remember exactly what place she was referring to. South Rukon was etched onto us, like a tattoo that you had no say in getting. And even if you tried to get it removed, it'd still leave a scar. Our memories from back then were usually ones filled with harshness and the smell of dirty streets. That's just how it was. But every now and then, I remember the fond memories we had, whether it was at the ocean, by a camp fire, or when we were stealing candy from cranky old shopkeepers. There was never a dull moment in the Rukongai, to say the least.

To tell you the truth, I really do remember those times fondly. But only the happy ones.

Rukia's eyes were glazed over, like she was thinking back too. There was always something in Rukia's eyes that made me feel calmer, at ease. But I wasn't the one who needed to feel at ease this time; she did. I guess it was hard to always be strong all by yourself, after all.

"Rukia..."

She arose, walking around the desk so that she could sit beside me on the bench. The old wood creaked as she rested her head on my shoulder, and I leaned my head on top of hers. She nestled her head onto my arm, allowing black hair to spill over my sleeve like running ink. I could hear the faint sound of more crying as she buried her face into my kimono. You have no idea what I would do to keep those tears from falling. If I could, I'd cry for her, just so she wouldn't have to, but things didn't work like that in real life. So in the end, we were both crying, and neither one of us stopped. She grasped the blanket tightly, and pulled it closer to her, like she couldn't survive without it. No matter how fiercely she pulled on that silk, her hands still looked so soft and fragile, like they couldn't hurt a single thing.

She could put the shattered pieces of a snowflake together with those hands, just like she could put back together the broken pieces of my heart.

~I~I~I~I~I~

"Fond memory brings the light of other days around me." ~Thomas Moore

~I~I~I~I~I~

The birds chirped the morning away like they didn't have a care in the world. I stared at them enviously through the window. Humid vapor swept over my face as I poured from a large, searing pitcher. Dark beverage flowed out of the vessel and rushed to meet the glossy finish of an elaborately designed porcelain cup.

"Tea sir?"

The ceramic in my hand was filled to the brim with piping liquid, and it warmed my fingers a little too much. It's heat produced thin steam that danced from the mug and mingled with the heavy air of the office. The herbal aroma flooded the room; it was hard not to notice it. The longer I held the cup, the more uncomfortable it became- both the heat, and the moment. Things were always kind of...awkward in the office on mornings like these. Honestly, I thought the tea would've been a nice gesture, but it was becoming more and more clear that the noble had no intention of accepting it. Still he refused to acknowledge me. Pale hands painted words across a yellowing sheet of vellum, and his sleeve blocked the writing from my vision. His placidity remained unbothered, and he kept on with his calligraphy, adorning the paper with his steady strokes of the paintbrush. The action almost resembled a shooing motion, like swatting away a pesky fly. How fitting. Captain Kuchiki could be condescending even without talking, I knew this better than anyone. He always had a way of making me feel like there was something wrong with me, like I was lesser, like I was dirt. But, since he was of nobility, he had a right to do so, didn't he? Of course I didn't think so, but then again, my opinion never did matter.

"Captain." Silence. His stubborn solemnity persisted quite irritatingly. Maybe he hadn't heard me? Or maybe he thought I wasn't "worthy" enough to speak to?

"Um...sir?" No response. I guess that was his way of greeting me for the day. How lovely. Finally, I gave up and set the exquisite tea cup down. The captain had a whole set of fine ceramics in his office. The dish ware was supposedly in high demand, but I personally couldn't see what was so special about a dumb cup. Despite my feelings towards it, I still made the attempt to do something kind, at the least, for him, but to no avail. Trying to please him was futile.

Paperwork had accumulated itself on my desk over the past week, and now seemed like the perfect time to address it. I just needed something to occupy me for right now. I sifted through the pile, searching for forms that I could make quick work of. Ultimately, I had ended up dividing the paperwork into two stacks: one consisting of the simple forms and progress reports, the other involving papers that addressed more difficult and complex matters. I began my work with the simpler stack, knowing it could be completed in a short amount of time. The forms lacked allure, as most paperwork did, but I was grateful that it only required little effort. Finally, when the first pile had been reduced down to nothing but completed documents, I saw it fit to take a small break from the tedious work of writing and reading. I sat back and folded my arms over my chest, watching the captain. Even now, he continued to write away on that vellum, like I was not there at all. The whole morning, he had not acknowledged my presence in the slightest. Now, I didn't have any issue with that. I suppose after two months of sitting in silence day after day in the office, one became immune to Byakuya's neglect and lack of a proper greeting. But what I did have a problem with was the fact that he had not even once asked about the information I had gathered the night before. His job was to ask, at the least.

"So...Captain Kuchiki." He stopped for a moment, frustrated, as he ran his long fingers through the raven hair that was free of the keiseken for once.

"What is it now, Renji?"

"I spoke with Rukia last night." The slick sound of ink gliding across paper began once more.

"She said it wasn't a human that attacked her, but a Hollow. One that has the ability to break a Zanpakuto. For good." Not even a flinch.

"Higher-ups said that she wouldn't be prosecuted harshly for her actions, but that she'd be sentenced to a mild punishment for not calling in to the Soul Society when the incident occurred. Still, the idea of a Hollow being able to do such a thing. Kinda scary. No doubt, whatever it is, it's a real threat. I think the Head Captain is in the process of planning some procedure to capture it."

Kuchiki Taichou did not look up, though somehow I already knew he wouldn't. These were sensitive matters, and he treated them like they were of no importance. Figures.

"Are you - are you listening?-"

"This talk is tedious." Those were his only words and just as soon as he spoke, he stood and swept himself towards the door. As he reached for the handle, he looked back at me.

"And Renji, that scroll on my desk, feel free to read it if you'd like." He slipped out the door, letting the door close gently behind him. Was this some kind of trick? Did he really want me to read his own personal documents? Curiosity overwhelmed me, and when the sound of soft footsteps faded down the hall, I got up from my seat, and peered over the captains desk.

Then I saw what he'd been writing. Actually, there were two peices of paper on his desk. One was the sheet of vellum on which he re-written some phrase of a quote that bored me too much to even try and comprehend. Something about Hell being empty and devils being somewhere else. What did that even mean? The other piece of paper was a small white note that had words scribbled across its face in blue ink.

RENJI - BUY MORE TEA.

I whispered, more to myself than anyone, as I crumpled the note in my fist.

"Whatever you say, your highness."

~I~I~I~I~I~

Sorry if its too going slow, please stick with me. Im setting it up for future chapters. Reviews make me happy:)