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Irrevocable

It is strange how even man's best laid plans go to pot. Sometimes the new path we take turns out to be better than the original one. However, that is not always the case. Because sometimes the muck up can be of such a large scale that the chance of redemption and getting back on the right path can seem almost and completely impossible. And that was how Jenny saw her life.

Back when Paris had drawn to an end and they were set to return to DC, she'd put matters of the heart above what her head was telling her and stayed which the man who had captured her heart. Jenny had turned down the job working as a liaison officer with Mossad in Cairo, instead she said yes to his marriage proposal. Paris ended with them both eloping in Paris before catching their flight back to the states - together. The proposal, the wedding, their relationship, it had all been perfect back then – cliché in some moments but perfect none the less.

One night, stood at the top of the Eiffel Tower on a brisk autumn night, the w2ind blowing her red hair across her face, when there were few people at the top. She stood there, looking down on the city that sprawled out like a cluster of flowers from above. Lights dotted all over, the lines of red and orange as cars raced around the city. They'd just been stood there talking about anything and everything, and then out of the blue he'd got down on one knee, and opened a velvet ring box. Whilst her head had been thinking work, her heart had been overwhelmed by the turn of events and she'd said yes with a beaming bright smile.

Things had even been perfect when they had returned to DC and she was on his team. Through Tony's joining the MCRT, and then Kate's too, through Kate's tragic death and then Ziva's joining. They'd worked together, and lived together, and loved each other. Whilst they had fought like cat and dog at work, they had never gone to bed on a fight. She still did the anti-terrorism opps that Director Marrow had wanted her to do with Mossad yet she remained based in DC. Her liaison was Ziva, which was how they met and also how she ended up on the team. From time to time Jenny would venture over to Israel and Egypt to oversee the operations, and each time she returned to her husband's welcome and loving arms.

Things had been blissful until the day that her husband decided to think he was immortal and was in an explosion and forgot everything from the past two decades, including his ever loving and faithful wife who sat by his bed day in day out. Then he left.

So whilst he was away in Mexico, Jenny set about initiating her self destruct mode and without her husband to help rescue her things went from bad to worse. And whilst Director Marrow had approved her search of Rene Benoit, her methods began to take the unofficial and not quite so legal approach. She sent Tony undercover and broke his heart, breaking Ziva's in the process. She divided the team and broke them all.

When he arrived back, things were in shreds. Jenny and Gibbs' relationship had been good for a few days. They'd been so caught up in each other that they had skived work for the first few days, and Marrow had turned a blind eye for them. But that was only until Gibbs realised that something was wrong, and what that something was. Within two months of his return a divorce had been filed for, and Jenny was stood informer of the Director, swallowing her pride and choking on tears she refused to let fall asking for either an immediate transfer or to hand in her resignation.

That was how she had ended up where she was now, based in Edinburgh, Scotland, - a new city, new people, a new partner, a new life, a new Jenny - but she still travelled. She worked in EA, extra aid. The division if NCIS which provided fly in agents for tough cases, mainly serial killers or media sensitive cases that needed a delicate touch. And even though they were often nicknames as 'glory takers' and often misjudged and not liked, it was a job Jenny loved.

The red head groaned as she let her wandering gaze travel out of the window. The almost soft skyline of Edinburgh's century's old skyline had long since faded from her small square window. Meaning she had left behind her the winding cobbled streets, ancient buildings and groups of photographing tourists. She wondered sometimes, just how many holiday photo's she was in the background of. Just how many she was an extra in, how many people would look back on that day and not even notice her as she went about her day to day life whilst they were in an air of complete bliss and happiness.

Out of her window the rugged skyline of DC was beginning to appear. The reflective glass of the modern buildings and the bright lights from traffic jams replacing the beauty of the historic city she had left. It was a city that held so many memories and the more recent ones not so good. It was a city that just over a few years ago she had fled from when her world collapsed around her. Now it was the place she feared most because it housed the people who she cared about most yet who could not stand to even be in the same room as her.

As they began to land Jenny placed the trashy romance novel she had been reading into her bag. Back when she was in school she'd loved the gritty crime novels, ones where you'd follow a detective over a series of books, learning their tell and style. Books in which you never knew who the culprit was until the very end. But these days she got enough of that at work so preferred something that she could get lost in. The trashy romance novels were not that trashy in her opinion. Her latest one: The Perfect Location followed three movie stars over the filming of a movie as their lives changed. It was Jenny's latest escapism.

Beside her Lisa was sketching away on a pad she'd brought with her. Lisa was Jenny's partner slash probie. When the red head had been paired with her on her first day in the Scottish city, rumour had had it that the girl had been damaged goods. Jen had though that marrow was thinking two damaged could make a whole, and maybe he was right, because a girl who had been on the verge of quitting was three years later still with NCIS and happy.

Lisa had only been with NCIS a year when she handed in get resignation, stuck in a team of misogynistic men had left her lacking in confidence. But not wanting to lose a good agent, the head of the Scottish office had consulted with Director Marrow and the two had paired them together and miraculously it had worked.

Lisa was young, in her twenties and drop dead gorgeous. She had a head of thick blonde hair, was petite but had long legs and perfect curves. The younger woman also had a quirky sense of style that matched her loyal attitude and contradicted her Navy past. Because before NCIS, Lisa had been in the Royal Navy. After doing her highers she had opted out of University and decided to go and join the navy. Yet after only two years her ship was in an explosion from which she was one of only a handful to survive. With temporary blindness and a permanent 30% loss of hearing in one ear along with a series of burns, Lisa had been honourably discharged. The survivor's guilt had never left her to the day. Which was why down the edge of her hand, from her wrist to little finger ran a tattooed 'Royal Navy' followed by her unit name and number. It was a reminder that there were people who would not get to see tomorrow whilst she would do.

Lisa drew because when she had first started working with Jenny, the red head had told her that you had to have something other than work. You had to have a hobby, something even if it was just reading or running – you needed something. Because sometimes you needed to switch off, you had to because otherwise you would find that you drove yourself mad. It was one of the many things jenny had taught her; the other was that on a flight you relaxed. Don't go reading the file none stop because you will have plenty of time for that: relax and conserve your energy for the case because you'll need it.

"You all right?" Lisa asked, her soft Scottish accent lacing the words. The blonde was well aware of her boss' past and marriage. She'd found out when she'd seen the wedding and engagement rings hung of a chain around her neck that was most often hidden.

The ring was perfect, the engagement ring and wedding ring were perfect. The engagement was a slim gold band which instead of having a diamond, it had a perfect Eiffel tower on it that sat partially on top of her wedding ring. The ring which was a plain gold band with two script J's engraved in it. They were elegant and simple, they were perfect. Jenny knew that they showed just how well he had known her. The day after he'd proposed she gone into town whilst he went to the registry office to get them a place. She'd got him a simple gold band, but because he'd had so many rungs over the years, on top she had then place two J's, not knowing hers would have the same.

That day she had bought a white lace dress. There would be no big ceremony or reception, no crowds cheering or bouquet. But she did have a white dress, and white heels. She did her makeup, curled her hair and met him there. With Decker and Ducky as their witnesses she had known in that moment that whatever would happen that would be the best day of her life, and it was.

"We'll solve the case and we'll go." Jenny said as she turned and gave a soft smile to the other woman who had become the closest thing that Jenny could call a friend.

"I can do this one alone? You can take the time as holiday. I don't mind." And although Jenny knew Lisa was simply trying her hardest to help, she brushed the comment off.

"No, no we're all grown adults right?"

"I'm here if you need me." And Jenny knew that that was true. So she gave her a soft smile before leaving her head back and closing her eyes as they hit turbulent before touching down on the soil that was home ground, and yet felt so foreign to her.

The pair went through security on auto pilot. They'd done the series of events so many times over the past few years that they could almost do it in their sleep. Both presented their passports, and in Lisa's case visa to the passport control, before going through metal detectors and anything else before arriving at the luggage belt. When there, Lisa grabbed her red pull along and Jenny grabbed her old worn duffle bag. It was always a bittersweet memory of Jethro. He'd been the one to buy her the bag after seeing what she intended to use. It had been her through many a journey and flight over the years, and it made Lisa laugh every time. Because Jenny was such a glamorous woman – naturally – she always looked beautiful with or without trying. The bag was just a complete contradiction of her image.

As they left the airport Jenny paused momentarily, still feeling like the place was alien, each street help a memory, but those memories were locked away in lead lined vaults at the back of her mind. It only took them a moment to see the member of the director's security who was waiting to pick them up. The pair walked over, got in, and Jenny told them the address of her townhouse.

"Where are we staying?" Questioned Lisa, knowing NCIS would not pay out for a hotel in Georgetown for the two agents.

"I still own a family house here, we can stay there." Jenny said, smiling. There was something about Lisa that always calmed Jenny that made her smile and relax.

"Oh, I thought he got the house." She said, referring to Gibbs but not using his name as she knew it was a touchy subject.

"We both had our own houses before the marriage, we lived in his except for whilst he was . . . away. But I kept mine at the end." Jenny quickly ignored the rest of the conversation and let them fall into their general ritual. "Right, what are the bullet points?"

Lisa began reciting the case. It was something Jenny had done on the very first case so that she could assess how much training the young probie had already gotten. But it had stuck, and now it brought a sense of comfort to the red head, and the other woman respected that. "An unidentified suspect has so far killed seven women – all prostitutes. The victims are established in a pattern of hair colour, blonde then brown, and then raven haired then a redhead; the next one is a red head. The last victim was killed yesterday; the girls are dumped in a variety of locations but always down an alleyway, and always spaced a week apart. The agents have as of yet no concrete leads or suspects…"

By the time that Jenny and Lisa arrived at the town house it was nearly nine am. Jenny tried to ignore the familiarity and memories that were coursing through her mind as she walked up to the front door. The street had not changed a bit, it still housed superior armed forces officers, people she knew from work, people her father had known. IT stood for everything she had once wanted, and everything that caused her world to shatter. She resented the street in many ways, but the house was the last thing she had to her family, so that was why she still kept it even now.

As Jenny placed the key in the lock of the heavy oak wooden door, Lisa stood back admiring the house. She lived in just a small flat and had grown up with nothing special. The grandest building aside from the Castle, which she had ever spent a significant amount of time in was the NCIS head quarters which were in a converted white townhouse. The kind with the black windows, and white bricks, then black iron gates at the front. "Come on." Jenny said as she walked in and Lisa hurried to follow her. Inside it had solid oak floors the whole way through, soft rugs and heavy furniture. Lisa could tell it had not been Jenny who decorated the place.

Jenny smiled, the place was warm and she could faintly hear the hum of the fridge in the kitchen. She thanked god for Noemi who still looked after the house even though Jenny was away, and who had known she was coming. "Up the stairs, there should be one of the doors open and a room made up for you." She said with a smile.

"Thank you." Lisa said, still in awe.

"Go get freshened up, meet me down here in fifteen minutes then I suppose we'd best head off." The blonde just nodded and carried her case up; when she got to the tops he looked down.

"It'll be fine you know. I know the full story and you deserve a second chance."

With that she went into her room and Jenny followed to hers. Wishing that the team would feel the same as her partner and probie agent did. With a sigh Jenny opened the door to the master bedroom and pushed away the tears. The room had not changed in the slightest since she had last been there. Whist Jethro was in Mexico she'd stayed in Georgetown because his house hurt too much. Now there was a picture of them on their wedding day by the side of her bed, and she remembered more pictures littered all over the house. Her heart clenched as she saw a younger version of herself smiling into the eyes of her new husband. Things had really changed.

Groaning Jenny put the bag down and went about unpacking, deliberately ignoring the clothes of his which were still hung in her wardrobe. With that done she went into the bathroom, washed her face and returned. She pulled of a pair of tan brown tulip chinos, soft white cotton ¾ sleeved blouse which was tucked in and a pair of tan brown suede heels. She let her hair down and kept it in it's lose curls before adding a fresh coat of mascara and a layer of 'vino disco' lip stick. With that done Jenny pulled out of her wardrobe an old worn brown leather Jacket that she had forgotten all about, pulled it on, grabbed her hand back, hid her ring, and sprayed perfume. With that done she returned downstairs.

Lisa was stood there, dressed in a blue A-line shirt that fell just below her knees; with it she had a white fitted blouse. On her feet was a pair of blue T strap heels. Her hair was tied up in a high ponytail and her fringe was up to. On the back of her neck you could still see the faint marks of the scars of burns from back when she was injured. Even though she had a partial heeling problem, you'd never know, and she never told many people. "Ready?" Jenny asked, and the younger woman turned around.

"Where was that taken?" She asked, motioning to a picture of Jenny and Ziva. They were smiling to the camera, who was behind it Jenny couldn't remember for the life of her.

"Cairo, she saved my life twenty minutes after that picture was taken."

"What's Cairo like?"

"Hot, dusty, dry, busy . . . beautiful. Anyway, we'll no doubt be there one day."

"We'll have bee everywhere."

"You're right there kid." Jenny said softly, before they headed out of the house. Jenny grabbed the keys to her old car that was still sat in the garage untouched. And with that they left. Jenny drove the familiar streets she had grown up with to headquarters and desperately tried to ignore the butterflies going mad in her stomach. Sometimes she wondered if they'd be able to forgive her, other times she just decided that what she had done was irrevocable.

Author's note – I hope that it was okay.

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