I had this story in my head for a long time and only just got down to writing it. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto

Road to Team 7

"Hey babe-"

"Kyaaaaaaaaa!"

A high pitched squeal was heard across the village of Konoha.

"Tch," a snort came from a dark-haired, blue-eyed teenager who was glaring at his teammate as said teammate tossed a rose towards a group of squealing girls.

"Jealous, dobe?" He asked his blue eyed teammate, a smirk plastered on his face.

Said dobe rolled his cerulean eyes at his teammate, lips twisted in a disgusted grimace.

"Like hell I'm jealous of your narcissistic, playboy Uchiha ass," he spat.

The Uchiha ignored the insult dished out by his teammate, choosing instead to wave and wink at a group of female Chunnins passing by. The group became undone by that simple gesture and started professing their undying love to the Uchiha.

"I love you Sasuke-kun!"

"Marry me Sasuke-kun!"

"Let me have your babies!"

"Let me touch your butt Sasuke-kun!"

The Uchiha soaked the attention like a hungry kitten for milk. His smirk got impossibly bigger as he conjured a rose out of nowhere and tossed it towards the group of females.

The poor rose was shredded with seconds of reaching the group, with everyone wanting a piece of '"Sasuke-kun's love'".

While all this was happening, the Uchiha's teammate watched the display in disgust.

Something was seriously wrong with the female population of Konoha, he thought, shaking his head of dark messy hair vigorously. He could never understand how such a vain guy like Sasuke could be so popular with the girls.

"Menma-kun?"

Blue eyes snapped open at the sound of his name and saw pink from the corner of his eyes. He turned to face his right and saw that the third member of his team was standing next to him, green eyes watching Sasuke tossing more roses to the crowd of girls with mild interest.

"Hey Sakura," Menma grinned at the pink-haired girl, making her focus her attention on him and smiling good naturedly.

They then turned their attention back to the Uchiha who currently had both his arms wrapped around the shoulders of two attractive civilian girls.

Menma snorted.

Sakura giggled softly at the blue eyed ninja's reaction.

"Sasuke-kun's pretty popular, huh?" Sakura giggled again when Menma gave another snort to her question.

"He's such a playboy," the ninja muttered and Sakura nodded in agreement.

Their attention turned back to Sasuke when they saw that the group of noisy females had left. Sasuke turned and walk towards his two teammates, stuffing something that looked suspiciously like polka-dot printed panties into his pocket.

Menma rolled his eyes when Sasuke flashed him a smug look.

"One of these days Sasuke," he said, "you're gonna get a girl pregnant by just looking at her."

Sasuke seemed unaffected by the comment, taking his time to fix his hair through the reflection of the glass window of the store Team 7 was supposed to meet up at for training.

"Just admit you're jealous dobe," the Uchiha provoked, "I can get all the girls in Konoha to my beck and call and you know it.'"

Sakura shifted uncomfortably in her position at that statement, silently hoping that Sasuke didn't include her as 'all the girls'.

"No, you can't," Menma countered, his lips forming a scowl as he glared at the Uchiha.

"Yes I can," Sasuke shot back.

"No you can't."

"Yes I can"

"No. You can't."

"Yes. I can."

"Bastard, you want a go?!"

"Bring it dobe!"

"Stop it, you two!" Sakura cried out suddenly, putting herself in between her two teammates in an attempt to prevent any fights from breaking out.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her before sighing, running his hand through his hair and muttered, "Hn."

"Tch."

Menma stopped his provocation but continued to glare at the Uchiha, who was checking out his reflection yet again.

"I still think you can't," he muttered under his breath.

Sasuke heard him and turned to face him, a smug look still present on his face that clearly says he can.

Irritated, Menma jabbed a finger to Sasuke's chest.

"Then prove it"

"Menma-kun!"

Menma ignored Sakura's cry of protest and continued to glare at the Uchiha.

Sasuke smirked, "Fine."

"Sasuke-kun!"

Neither paid attention to their pink haired teammates pleas.

The scowl on Menma's face turn upwards to form a devious grin and Sakura knew he was up to no good.

"Alright," the blue eyed teenager began slowly, "I want you to use one of your pickup lines on the next girl that walks this way."

A soft gasp came from Sakura but Sasuke paid no heed. If he had, he would have noticed that she wasn't staring at Menma but in the direction behind Sasuke.

"That's it?" The Uchiha raised an eyebrow at Menma, clearly smug.

But Menma had something else up his sleeve.

With a wide grin he continued, "You can't look at her before delivering your damn pick up line so none of your damn winks or smirks is going to help you."

"Hah," Sasuke ran a hand through his hair once again, the confident smirk still gracing his face.

"Piece of cake."

Menma's grin got impossibly bigger upon his challenge being accepted. A tug on his arm reminded him that Sakura was beside him. He looked at her to find her green eyes wide with worry looking behind Sasuke. He followed her line of sight and his eyes twinkled mischievously.

"There's one walking towards us right now."

Sasuke smirked and whipped out a rose (seriously, where did all the roses come from? Menma wondered) and took a step back, his back facing the oncoming "victim".

"Watch and learn, dobe."

Menma and Sakura watched in bated breath - Menma in anticipation while Sakura in worry - as Sasuke counted the numbers of steps his victim was behind him.

As soon as the footsteps were close enough, Sasuke turned slowly.

"Wanna populate the Uchih-"

"Jyuuken!"

There was an indignant "oof!" And a split second later the Uchiha was sent tumbling along the concrete pavement before smacking face first into side of the building. He landed unceremoniously on the ground, twitching.

Sakura gasped and with a panicked "Sasuke-kun!" rushed towards the disorientated Uchiha, her hands glowing green upon touching his broken nose.

Menma stood at his spot, his whole body trembling with suppressed laughter as he watched Hyuuga Hinata relaxed from her fighting stance and deactivated her Byakugan. With a look of disgust directed at the wreck of an Uchiha, she left the area - but not before giving Menma a really suggestive wink.

Menma gave her a smirk and watched her leave before walking towards his two teammates.

Staring at Sasuke who was looking very put off, Menma gave the biggest shit-eating grin he could muster.

"No you can't."

"... Shut up."