"Any progress, sir?" asked Alfred, as Batman bent over a microscope in the Batcave. Selina Kyle and Poison Ivy had been given a sedative and were resting on slabs nearby, as Batman studied a sample of their infected blood.

"Their blood's been mutated," he murmured. "That's what the vampire toxin does to it. Much like Ivy was able to mutate her blood to partially transform into a plant, Dracula's poison attacks human blood cells and transforms them into vampires. For Harley, the process wasn't complete, and it instantly reversed itself when the source no longer existed. For Selina and Ivy…" he trailed off. "I'm just not sure how to reverse the process," he murmured. "There's no science that can help me here. But medicine has to have progressed enough in two-hundred years that it can save people from vampirism."

"I don't imagine it's a disease that's commonly studied, sir," replied Alfred. "Considering many people believe it to be a fictional affliction."

"I…can't give up hope, though," muttered Batman. "There has to be a way."

He picked up Van Helsing's notes and searched through them again. His eyes fell on the words No known way of reversing the effect, and his heart sank in despair.

He put down the notes and something suddenly fell out of them. It was a small envelope. Batman bent down and picked it up, opening it. It was a letter.

Dear Solomon,

I am writing to you for what I believe will be the final time. I am a man who has dealt much with death over the years, and I can tell that it is upon me now. I am not afraid to go to my eternal rest – indeed, I welcome the relief. Life long ago became a burden I no longer wished to bear, after all the horror I have seen and suffered. But a man must always fight where he can. Surrender is not an option, as I'm sure you agree. The Waynes have always been fighters, like the Van Helsings.

Since not much time remains to me, I will try to be brief. You have been a great friend to me over the years, and I can never express how much I am in your debt for the task you agreed to do for me, taking upon yourself and your family the duty to guard the world from that evil. I pray that Gotham will always have such a strong and faithful guardian to depend upon from whatever terrors afflict it. The night would be too dark to bear otherwise.

I have faced many evils in my time, and I like to think I am wiser for it. I have no children of my own to pass that wisdom on to, but I would like to share it with an old friend, if I may, so that you may one day share it with your children, and your children's children. There are many evils in this world, and you must arm yourself with whatever weapons you can to fight them. Strength, both of body and heart, knowledge, and faith. I do not speak of faith in an immortal being, although I do believe in one, but more importantly, faith in mankind. Belief in the power of humanity to conquer the greatest odds, to vanquish the most dangerous monsters, and overcome the most insurmountable obstacles. Nothing is impossible – my life has taught me that. Consider all things, dismiss nothing without reason, and believe in the power of the human race. It is greater than you know.

Believe also in love, which is the one saving grace in a world of darkness. Your friendship has brightened my own immeasurably. Thank you for that. God bless and keep you and yours always,

Abraham Van Helsing

Batman put down the letter as his jaw tightened in resolution. "Alfred, could you please make me some coffee?" he murmured. "I might be in for a long night."

…

The sun was rising as Batman withdrew the needle from Selina's arm, and waited. She didn't respond for many minutes, and his heart pounded like a drum. Then, slowly, her eyes fluttered open. Selina's eyes, with Selina's soul shining out from them. "Bats," she whispered, confused. "What happened? Where am I?"

She looked around and grinned. "You did decide to take Kitty home, huh?" she murmured. "Does this mean we're taking our relationship to the next level?"

"Selina," whispered Batman, genuinely smiling in relief. "Would you mind it a lot if I kissed you?"

"Never know until you try," she whispered, grinning.

He grinned back, and then pressed his mouth gently into hers. Alfred was about to enter the cave to check on Batman's progress, saw the situation, and returned up the stairs from whence he had come.

…

"So ya lost your house, Red, and all your plants are dead, and the Bat took you back to Arkham, but look on the bright side! Mr. J and me are in here too! And at least you're back to your old self!" exclaimed Harley, beaming at Ivy.

"Yeah…I guess it could be worse," sighed Ivy, taking a seat on the sofa in the Rec Room. "I don't really remember anything in between taking Dracula home and waking up here. Did I do anything stupid?"

"Uh…define stupid," said Harley, slowly.

"Pammie, you're back!" exclaimed Joker, entering the Rec Room and beaming. "And minus the fangs! Aw, ain't that terrific? Hope things aren't awkward between you and Johnny Crane after you attacked him and all. Though I hear he didn't really mind – most action he's ever got in his life!" chuckled Joker.

"I…did what?" stammered Ivy.

"You were a vampire, Red, I'm sure he understands," said Harley, waving her hand. "That's kinda what vampires do."

"You mean I was…a blood-sucking monster?" asked Ivy.

"Yeah. That's what a vampire is, Red," replied Harley.

"I dunno – I've only ever read Twilight," retorted Ivy. "And that's not the impression of vampires you get from that."

"What is this Twilight crap?" asked Joker. "And who's Bella?"

"You don't wanna know, Mr. J," said Harley.

"No, I guess not," agreed Joker. "I've had enough of vampires to last me a lifetime."

He sat down and flicked on the TV, where a Dracula movie was playing. "All right, I love this one!" he exclaimed. "It's the best ending ever – that Da Vinci guy runs across the table and rips off the curtain, catching Bela in the sunlight, and then he makes this cross outta two candlesticks! It's great stuff! Yeah! Take that, Bela!" he shouted. "Not that the whole sunlight thing works on real vampires, but hey, you can't argue with good entertainment!"

"Mr. J, can you turn it off?" asked Harley. "It brings back bad memories for Red and me."

"Oh, lighten up, Harley," Joker snapped. "It's just a movie. Anyway, vampires don't exist."

"You just fought one," retorted Ivy.

"Yeah. And I killed him, didn't I?" retorted Joker. "So they don't exist anymore. Some un-dead moron still controlling your brain, Pammie, or are you just stupid?"

Ivy sighed heavily and stood up, leaving the room. Harley joined Joker on the sofa, cuddling him tenderly. "Aw, and the guy and the girl are together in the end, just like us," she said, kissing his cheek. "My hero."

"Hey, Bats is the hero," retorted Joker. "I just enjoy stabbing people and cutting off their heads."

"Yeah," sighed Harley. "You're an angel, puddin'."

"I'm fine being anything except a vampire," said Joker. "They suck."

"I knew you were gonna get around to using that joke, puddin'," said Harley, beaming.

Joker grinned. "Saved the best for last, pooh," he said, kissing her.

The End