I own no one but my own people

"Cut! Mariska, Sweetie, I need you focused right now, not looking like you're in the middle of a day dream. We got one more shot and then you're done for the day. You think you' gonna be okay?"

Mariska snapped out of her thoughts and turned towards the director, Constantine, who was doing his best not to shout at the woman who had ruined nearly every take since after lunch. It was the end of the day, it was a big dramatic scene, and he just wanted to be done with the actual shooting for the day.

All eyes flashed to the actress who cleared her throat. "Sorry, everyone," Mariska announced, "my fault."

"You need to take a break?" he asked once again trying to hide his agitation.

Chris eyes the director for a quick second before he smirked, wrapping his arm around Mariska. "She'll be fine. We had sex in her tailor during lunch so she's probably just tired from that."

Mariska rolled her eyes at the attempt Chris made to try to lighten the mood. Surely she would play right along with his stories but today she was in no mood to play around.

She had no more scenes with Peter that day so he was happy to stay behind the camera when she was on screen, glancing at his script and avoiding any and all contact with Mariska at any cost. She tried catching his eyes several times but he always seemed to be glancing away or looking down when that happened.

This time was no different and her spirits sank even more when he refused to look over at her. Any other person that ignored her like that she would have brushed off and forgave but he was different. She didn't wanna brush Peter off. At all.

But she was working right now and her director was getting more and more angrier with every shot she ruined so she tore her eyes away from the tall man and turned back towards Constantine who rolled his eyes as well. "Well whatever the reason, this is our last scene for the day and we really need it done so lets just get through it, alright?"

Mariska swallowed hard and nodded. Their director took a deep breath and grabbed his script. "Lets take it back to Elliot saying 'I go home' and go from there. Cameras one, three, and four on, lighting stay fixed."

Mariska cast a final look towards Peter who still continued to read his script before she quickly turned back towards Chris who, for all his ribbing, gave her a sympathetic smile. "And action!"

"Law and Order, 3.11, scene 6-2, rolling!"

They heard the loud clap and Chris immediately launched into his lines. "So what, I go home and I'm supposed to tell Kathy about my day? 'Honey, today some guy cut a baby out of a woman's stomach, pass the gravy please'."

Chris shook his head and Mariska narrowed her eyes like she was angry at the man sitting next to her. "So you just don't talk? You don't tell her anything?"

"Well one of us has to sleep at night." He lifted his head to look at her. "She thinks I'm shutting her out."
Mariska shook her head and stood up from the bench. "You are. It's what you do, Elliot, and if you don't watch it, you're going to lose the best thing you have."

Without giving him a second she turned and walked, carefully hitting every pink tape they had laid out for her mark.

"And cut! Everyone that's a wrap, good job. See you here bright and early, 6 AM! Scenes 4, 7,8, and 2 tomorrow, lets get it done, folks, we ran a little bit behind today."

Mariska sighed with relief as the loud buzz echoed in the New Jersey set. She ran a hand through her hair as she trudged to wardrobe where her clothes were locked securely away. She quickly changed in the clothes she had on before she had started filming, bid them good night and made her way towards her dressing room where Chris was waiting with a sad smile. "Hey," he greeted with a nod, shoving his hands in his pockets to protect him from the cold January cold. "You doing okay?"

Mariska shrugged as she too secured her hands in her coat. "I'll be better once I get home and forget this whole day ever happened."

Chris' smile disappeared. "Marish, come on it wasn't that bad."

"He wouldn't even look at me the rest of the day," she said with a slight whine.

"He'll get over it. If not then is he really worth pining over?"

"Yes."

Chris rolled his eyes but as he opened his mouth to protest, something behind her shoulder caught his eye and he nodded towards him. "Look what Krout showed up," he muttered gently as he began to walk towards whatever had caught his eye. Mariska followed his line of sight and that familiar warm feeling filled her as Peter walked over to her and gave her a soft smile. "Hey," Mariska breathed as he stopped in front of her.

"Hey," he greeted just as soft.

They stood in awkward silence for a moment before Mariska cleared her throat. "So we really haven't had a chance to talk since lunch," she muttered.

"Yeah I feel that's kind of my fault," said Peter. "And I apologize for that."

"No, you don't have to, I'm the one who insulted you," Mariska said quickly. "I shouldn't have insulted you like that."

"I over reacted."

"I would have done the same thing."

"Even still, it was immature of me to storm off like that and act like a child the rest of the day."

Mariska raised her brow. "Are we gonna do the thing where we both try to one up the other on who was more wrong?"

"Looks like it," Peter affirmed with a smile that made the shorter brunette weak in the knees.

Mariska returned the smile before she wrapped her coat around her tighter. "I know we have to be in real early tomorrow but do you maybe wanna go get some coffee somewhere?"

Peter raised his brow. "You're serious?"

"Yeah. I mean it's cold out, a nice hot coffee might be just what we need to warm s both up," she said with a slight smirk.

Before Peter could answer a shrill ring came forth from Mariska's pocket. "Crap," she muttered as she pulled out her phone. "Hold that thought," she told him as she glanced down at the Caller ID. The caller had a name but she had no idea who 'Ryan' was so she merely flipped open the phone and put it to her ear. "Hello," she greeted, holding up a finger to Peter to tell him to hang on another second.

"Is this Mariska?" a males voice asked.

"Yes. Who's this?"

"This is Ryan Gil. Stephanie said she gave me your number a few days ago? We were supposed to go out tonight?"

Mariska's lips parted in confusion for a moment before her jaw dropped. She ran a hand through her hair that in her opinion was far too short as the memory came crashing back down to her. "Oh my God, I'm sorry! I completely forgot we..." Mariska swallowed hard as she looked over a patiently waiting Peter and sighed. "We were supposed to go out tonight."

Peter's face fell for a moment before he cleared his throat. "I'll see ya tomorrow, Mariska," he told her with an almost sad smile.

Mariska shook her head almost violently and almost reached out to physically stop him from leaving but he turned and walked away leaving her in a far worse slump then before.

She stomped her foot, ignoring the looks from the crew, and went into her dresser room, slamming the door behind her. She put the phone on speaker as she collapsed on the couch face first. "That's fine," Ryan told her. "But are we still on for tonight? I made us reservations for a late dinner but if you've already eaten that's fine. There's this great little bar I know, very exclusive and top notch security."

"It's actually a little late and I gotta be in early tomorrow," she told the man already feeling guilty for lying to him.

There was a slight pause. "Oh. Well I mean sure, that makes sense. I'm actually a writer so I completely understand long nights and early mornings," he said with a somewhat forced laugh. "But maybe tomorrow night we could go do something?" he offered hopefully.

"It's gonna be a long night tomorrow too."

"Ah." His voice faltered and his tone was becoming far more nervous. "Well when are you free, we can make a date then?"

"Not in the near future actually," she told him as apologetically as she could. "I mean we're just starting shooting the second half of the season and so it's gonna be a few weeks where I won't have any free time. I'm sorry."

A twinge of guilt overtook her as she lied to the man. She was actually free this Saturday but she had hoped to spend that day and possibly night with Peter, not a blind date Stephanie had set her up with.

There was another pause before he spoke, his voice nothing but downtrodden . "Oh. I see. Well uh, don't worry about it, ya know? We all had our long days. But you have my number so when you get free just give me a call."

Mariska's heart sank even more as she heard the disappointment through the phone. She sighed as she sat up on the couch and ran a hand through her hair. "I'm sorry, Ryan. You seem like a really nice guy, and I really do have a lot to do tomorrow and every day after that and then today I'm wiped out."

"No, no, I understand. But um... like I said, you have my number so... I'll talk to you later... Maybe?"

"Sure," she told him, shifting uncomfortably where she sat. "Have a good night, Ryan."

"You too."

And without another word she flipped the phone shut and shoved it into her pocket. With a heavy sighed she got up from the couch, pulled on her jacket, ignored the phone call from Stephanie who would be demanding to know why she canceled on yet another blind date, and headed out for the evening.

The whole ride home she was unusually quiet, unable to concentrate on anything but the tall green eyed man she had insulted earlier then had given the impression she was actually going on a date a guy when she hadn't even met him.

He was intelligent, amazingly good looking, funny, witty, charming.. as much as she tried she couldn't think of any kind of flaw on him apart from he didn't like being called an ethnic slur.

As soon as the driver pulled up to her door, she thanked him with a smile that was far less genuine then usual, greeted her doorman with equal joyfulness, and headed up to her apartment.

It was abandoned and silent when she walked in. After double checking her locks, she walked over to her couch and collapsed on it with a sigh, conflicted. She wanted to be alone but at the same time she hated being alone. Sure she had a large magnitude of friends she could have called p and, if she was really feeling ambitious, she could have had a small party going on within fifteen minutes.

But she didn't want that kind of company. She wanted company where she could just rest her head on his chest, wrap her arms around him, and nuzzle into his shirt.

She hadn't had sex in four months and she would have been lying if she said she wasn't sick of coming home to an empty apartment every night.

Mariska sighed as she glanced over to a photo of her family when she was only six months old, with Jayne front and center holding Mariska in her arms while her other siblings stood around her.

"Look at you, Mom," the brunette sighed. "You had husbands, a minivan full of kids, a great career... Why am I only allowed to choose one?"

Mariska continued to look at the photo for several more seconds before she began to feel the effects of the day weighing on her. With a heavy groan, she got off the couch, made her way into her bathroom, and readied herself for bed.

After she had finished, Mariska laid there in bed in a simple silky black teddy, praying that things went completely different with Peter and he would realize just how much he meant to her.

She didn't realize the same prayer was being uttered fifteen blocks away by the same man she was praying about...

Please Review, I know it's moving kind of slow but it'll pick up, I promise.