A/N: Last chapter and Epilogue. Get your Kleenex. This will be bittersweet. Prepare to be kicked in the feels.

The song in this chapter: Whenever You Remember by Carrie Underwood

Chapter 14

When you look back on times we had, I hope you smile.

And know that through the good and through the bad, I was on your side.

When nobody could hold us down, we claimed the brightest star.

And we came so far, and no they won't forget…

Spock cradled Jim to him in their bed, through the bond he could feel him weakening, fading quickly. He pressed his forehead to his, feeling the warmth of Jim's breath on his face. His hand gently cupped his cheek, stroking it gingerly with his thumb. Watching as vibrant amber eyes stared into his, a fear dwindling in their depths.

"Do not fear, T'hy'la. I am here." He whispered to him.

Jim's hand reached up to lay upon Spock's, the cool hand trembled against Spock's heated skin.

"Show me." Jim whispered. "I want to see what I mean to you."

Whenever you remember time's gone by. Remember how we held our heads so high?

When all this world was there for us? And we believed that we could touch the sky?

Whenever you remember, I'll be there. Remember how we reached that dream together?

Whenever you remember…

Spock's fingers moved slowly to the psi point on his face, they trembled; he could feel the barriers in his mind cracking, eroding away. Jim closed his eyes, waiting for the meld, waiting for the memories he longed to see once more. Spock stared at this man's face, taking in the details of his aged face, still so beautiful—still so remarkably Jim.

He closed his eyes as a familiar flash erupted, the meld connection beaming brightly. The warmth, colors, and sounds of Jim's mind wrapped themselves around him and he allowed them to fully embrace him for a moment, indulging in the comfort of it. He could feel Jim's love for him, its depth expanded beyond all thoughts; it couldn't be seen, only felt. The feeling caressed Spock gently, rushing through him like a warm current, filling him until he ached from the sensation.

"Show me." Jim's thought echoed through the bond.

He pulled the memory from his conscious, the first one he wanted Jim to see.

Jim stood on the transporter pad; his arms wrapped around his separated half, the darker side of him slumped in his arms. Spock didn't show it, but he was terrified. This theory about rejoining the two halves could not work; it could hurt Jim more or possibly kill him. It had taken time, but a feeling had blossomed in him for this man and feared he would never be able to express it. He kept his eyes diverted, quickly turning from him to leave for the control panel.

"Spock."

His heart hammered at the sound, and he whirled around quickly. He wanted to scream his feelings. So desperate and terrified that this could be the last time he would hear his name spoken on Jim's lips.

"Yes, Captain?" It came out rushed, panic stricken.

The amber eyes softened, fear washing out the vibrant colors. Sadness brushed across his face, staring after Spock as though he didn't want him to leave.

"In case this doesn't work…" His words trail off. Something raw mixing in with the fear in his eyes, but Spock understands. It hits him hard, the pounding of his heart suddenly feeling strained, a pressure squeezing, constricting it. A rush of longing, an urge he never knew was so intense stirred inside, clenching his stomach in tight knots, his breaths becoming painful, knitting Jim's unspoken words together in his mind.

In case this doesn't work…I want you to know I love you.

He wanted to hear them out loud but couldn't find the words to speak. If Jim survived this, he would surely tell him. But for now, this was all Jim could do; give him the knowledge, knowing he himself would break if he spoke them. Tears stung at Spock's eyes, drinking in the image of the man whose life may be over before it could begin. The man that he achingly longed for, that he had found a feeling inside he did not acknowledge that existed within him. The man he loved.

He swallowed down the hard lump in his throat, fighting the tears.

"Understood…" His voice wavered. A small wave of relief crossed Jim's face, knowing that his message had rung clear.

When Jim had rematerialized onto the platform as a whole person, Spock's breath caught in his chest. Jim looked dazed, incoherent. Had he lost him? Then Jim smiled, it reached his eyes and they twinkled with a light all of their own. Spock felt a wave of relief, joy, happiness, and love course over him, slamming into him hard as he felt his lips twitch into a smile.

"This was before the night I confessed and you told me you loved me in return. We spent the night together in my quarters."

"Yes, T'hy'la. It was the day you completed me."

The memory fell away as Spock was again wrapped in the swirls and thoughts of Jim, searching deep within his mind to pull forth another memory.

When you think back on all we've done, I hope you're proud.

When you look back and see how far we've come, it was our time to shine and nobody could hold us down.

They thought they'd see us fall, but we stood so tall and no, we won't forget…

Spock reached further, locating the memory that he needed, pulling it to the surface of their minds.

"Spock!" Jim's voice strained.

His body reacted to the sound; he straightened himself, tugging at his uniform. Spock didn't want Jim to feel pain; he didn't want him to witness as his body was deteriorating from the radioactivity, stiffly walking toward the sound of the voice and bumping into cool glass. The image of his beloved was blurred, his body burning, every cell ablaze. He leaned into the glass; he had to know that Jim would be safe.

"Ship…out of danger?"

"Yes." His voice was coated with sorrow.

I don't want you to be sad for me, T'hy'la. I needed to do this to save the ship, to save you. You mean everything and more and I couldn't bear the thought of losing you.

"Don't grieve, Admiral. It was logical. The needs of the many outweigh..."

"The needs of the few." Jim continued.

You are more important than I, Jim.

"Or the one."

Suddenly he was sliding onto the floor, his strength abandoning him.

"Spock…" Jim's pain burned into him, he couldn't reach out to his beloved, couldn't soothe the pain away.

Separated by a thin sheet of glass.

"I am now and forever shall be…your friend."

I will always be with you.

His hand formed into a Ta'al, placing it against the glass. His vision darkening, but he could swear he felt the heat of Jim's hand pressing against the other side.

I love you.

Then he faded away, leaving behind glistening honey eyes silently calling his name.

"I died that day, I loved you so much." Jim's voice whispered through the bond.

"As did I when you passed."

The memory melted away as Spock sent waves of comfort to diminish Jim's agony at the memory, soothing him.

Whenever you remember time's gone by. Remember how we held our heads so high?

When all this world was there for us? And we believed that we could touch the sky?

Whenever you remember, I'll be there. Remember how we reached that dream together?

Whenever you remember…

Spock pulled a final memory for Jim, feeling his time growing short.

A woman dressed in a blue gown sat with eyes of stone boring into Spock's. Her bronze hair swept back and hung down, her lips pursed, furrowing her brow in frustration.

"This moment, Doctor McCoy is examining the Captain for psychological changes. If any facts are uncovered, that would be acceptable evidence." Spock said. His arms folded behind his back. He did not trust this woman, a woman who seemed to want to hurt Jim. Trying to confuse the crew into thinking she holds Jim's essence within her body, it seemed highly illogical. However, something felt off, Jim had been acting….strange.

She stood, attempting to give him examples of their journey together, but they were logged and could easily be accessed, it was going to take more for her to convince him otherwise. He would protect Jim, no matter the cost. Janice turned away from him, taking a palpable moment then whirled around to face him, a fire of truth blazing in her eyes.

"You are closer to the Captain than anyone in the universe. You know his thoughts. What does your telepathic mind tell you now?"

He felt a peak of curiosity, her eyes held no fear, pleading with him to believe her. He cautiously approached her, fingers seeking out the meld points on her face. At first there was an unusual resistance, a barrier that he couldn't penetrate. He prodded it and smashed against it until it crumpled away, revealing a familiar light, colors and warmth.

An image appeared in the link, Spock and Jim entangled together in Jim's bed sheets, their skin glistening with sweat. Jim presses his forehead against Spock's, his breathing labored. Spock's hand ran through Jim's matted hair, causing a content sigh from his lips.

"T'hy'la." Spock whispered, placing a small kiss upon his brow.

"What?" Jim asked, his amber eyes darting up to him, half-lidded and flooded with euphoria.

"It is a Vulcan term that is difficult to translate. Friend, brother, lover, or "soul-mate" as you prefer. That is what you are to me."

A smile grew steadily across Jim's face.

"Why Spock, I didn't know you could be so romantic."

A small smile twitched at Spock's lips, his hand stroking against the stubble on Jim's face, placing a light kiss upon the human's lips.

"I will be everything you need me to be, T'hy'la."

Spock's eyes shot open, disconnecting the meld, stepping away from Janice to collect his thoughts. This was the moment he knew Jim was his "T'hy'la", this memory could not be replicated, he only used the term when they were alone. He turned to the woman, her eyes set on him. This was not Janice Lester, this was Jim.

"I believe you."

The memory morphed back into the familiar swirls of Jim's mind again, but the light was beginning to fade.

"I knew you'd figure it out." Jim's voice echoed, "I always had faith you'd save me when I was in danger."

"I would never abandon you, Jim."

We claimed the brightest star, and we came so far.

You know that we showed them all, and no, they won't forget…

Spock felt Jim's mind sluggishly pulling forth a memory. He waited patiently, curious as to see what Jim desired him to remember. The memory flashed before him and he felt his heart clench, a lump formed in his throat.

Jim was straightening his tie, frustrated.

"Jim, do you believe this to be…necessary?"

"Yes, Spock. We're getting married today and we're going to do it the right way."

Spock's eyebrow arched.

"We are technically already 'married'. We have bonded."

Jim laughed as he finally straightened the tie, tightening it snuggly at the base of Spock's neck.

"Yes, according to Vulcan laws, that is true. But, not in Earth terms. Besides, if we don't, it will break my mother's heart." He grinned at the Vulcan. "You really don't want to face her wrath, do you?"

"Preferably not." The Vulcan stated, "My mother would feel disappointed as well, though she would not so freely admit it."

"Oh? How would you know then?" He beamed.

"She…has certain ways of delivering a message." Spock said mildly.

Jim chuckled softly.

"I didn't know Vulcans could be afraid of their mothers."

"Vulcans do not feel fear." He said flatly.

Jim smiled; it reached up into his eyes, twinkling with mirth.

"Of course not." He winked.

The ceremony was small, only a few selected individuals were present. It was against Starfleet regulations for the Captain and his First Officer to date, let alone marry unless separated on different ships. They feared that would be the outcome, so they limited their guest list to those they could trust the most.

Bones officiated, rolling his eyes teasingly as they spoke their vows.

"Alright you two, go on." Bones closed the book, smiling at them.

Jim reached for Spock, a hand caressing the side of his face. As their lips connected the cheers died away, leaving them in a world that only belonged to them. They were together, married—one. And it would stay that way, no matter the cost. No matter what life threw at them.

Spock eased himself from the memory and out of the meld, tears streaming from his eyes as he looked down at the man he cherished for so long. The lights began to dim in his honey eyes, his eyelids drooping, a small smile on his face. He weakly wiped a tear from Spock's face.

Whenever you remember time's gone by. Remember how we held our heads so high?

When all this world was there for us? And we believed that we could touch the sky?

"I love you, Spock. Don't forget me." Jim whispered.

Spock clutched Jim's hand in his, his lip quivering as he bent toward him, kissing his lips softly.

"I could never forget you. I love you, T'hy'la." His voice cracked.

"I'll see you in the next life?" Jim's smile widened.

"Wherever you decide to lead, I will follow."

Whenever you remember, I'll be there. Remember how we reached that dream together?

Whenever you remember…

Jim's eyes slid shut, his face slackened, drawing a shaky breath before he stilled. Peaceful.

Spock closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against his. Another tear sliding down his cheek as the connection darkened, his mind painfully empty, the comforting hum of Jim's mind gone forever.

It was time.

He breathed in Jim's scent once more before he willed himself into a peaceful sleep, never to awake again.

Whenever you remember…

Epilogue

Two sets of footprints appeared in the freshly fallen snow. The Earth sky was tinted a dark grey, small flakes floating down from the heavens. They hiked the mountain, slipping occasionally. They wouldn't allow the conditions to deter them from their mission. Their breaths labored as they reached the peak, glancing out in awe at the frozen surroundings.

"Yosemite is beautiful." The young man said, scanning the view with mystical blue eyes.

"Yes." The Vulcan nodded, his eyes gazing out before they fell on the Human beside him. "A fitting location, their request was adequate."

The young man's face fell, pulling two small urns from the bag he carried, caressing their shiny surfaces.

"Are you all right, Jim?" The Vulcan asked, placing his hand gently on his back, rubbing in small soothing circles.

A small smile appeared on Jim's face.

"I'm going to miss them." He whispered.

He nodded.

"I…find myself grieved by their loss as well."

Jim's eyes connected with Spock's, a wet sheen appearing. Spock's arms wrapped around him, pulling him close, his hand continuing to rub the Human's back.

"They will not be forgotten, Jim. They live on through us."

Jim nodded against his chest before gently pulling away. Spock plucked an urn from Jim's hand and Jim smiled at him.

"Are you sure you want that one?" he asked.

"It would deem…the most appropriate choice." Spock said gently. "It is after all, remnants of the other form of me."

They eased themselves close to the edge of the mountain, removing the lids of the urns and taking one last look at each other before tossing the ashes over the side. The grey particles intermingled, blowing in different directions as a small wind picked up, spreading them across the beauty of the land, becoming one.

"Their relationship was illogical. At times, I struggle to understand it." Spock said softly, watching the ashes fade away.

A tear leaked from Jim's eyes as he smiled at the Vulcan.

"It's like climbing a mountain, Spock. Sometimes, you just have to do it simply because it's there."

Fin

A/N: Thank you so much to all my readers! I appreciate ALL the reviews, follows, and favorites!

The sort of sequel to this fanfiction is: You Called Me Beautiful.

Thank you again for reading and please don't forget to review!