Dresses, Wigs, and Silicone

Summary: After seeing an ad posted in the newspaper Naruto's best friends Kiba and Sakura decide to play dress up in order to get Naruto a job at the Uchiha mansion as a maid. So, they turn the adorable blonde boy into a sexy blonde bombshell. After getting hired Naruto must remain a woman for the summer while trying to keep it a secret. Will he be able to with everything going on?

Rating: M

Pairings: SasukeXNaruto, ItachiXNaruto, KakashiXSakura, KibaXHinata, and others.

Author's Note: Eeep! Chapter Thirteen guys, how crazy is that!? I'm really pushing for reviews though guys! I need the motivation. College is sucking all of my creative juices from my head and squirting them on useless essays for history and English. Sigh. Even my creative writing I took this past semester seemed to suck my creative meter dry. It's slowly building up, but it could definitely use some assistance. Every review is another step closer to a happy creative me! :D

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Read and Review

XOXO

'"You fondled his head."

Naruto stared at his pink haired friend with a dumbfounded look on his face. "What?"

"You fondled Itachi's head," She turned her head toward Kiba who had his hands wrapped firmly around Hinata's waist as if gluing her to his lap. The blue haired woman sat quietly with her whole face painted a bright red. "Am I wrong?"

The overly happy Kiba shook his head. "No you're right, this is a case of first degree head fondling."

Hinata looked over to the blonde woman who was currently as bright red as she was. "K-kiba, you are embarrassing Naru."

He scoffed. "I'd be embarrassed too if I fondled one of my bosses."

"Do you guys even know the definition of fondling!?" Naruto gushed.

Sakura turned to him with an evil smirk. "To stroke or caress lovingly or erotically."

All three people opposite of the pinkette looked at her with wide eyes. A few moments passed of nothing but silence and a few blinks before Kiba burst out laughing. A small smile tugged on Hinata's petite mouth while the blonde on the opposite side of the couple looked aghast. "Oh my god!" He yelped. "I fondled Itachi."

A throaty chuckle penetrated the small area that the four friends were hanging out in. Naruto turned to see the eldest Uchiha leaning casually against the door frame with his arms folded over his chest. His long dark strands of hair fell loosely around his shoulder giving him an easy-going look that he usually did not possess. "I'm surprised to hear you admit to our tryst, my little Naru."

Sakura turned to her friend with her mouth agape. "You slept with him."

"I did not."

The raven placed a finger against his chin in thought. "Technically, we did."

Naruto spun to glare at the man. "We did not sleep together."

"But, Naru, after you fondled me we climbed into Kakashi's bed and…"

"You whore!" Sakura exclaimed with a giant grin on her face as she repetitively smacked Naruto's back. Hinata looked at Kiba with a worried expression who just laughed. He patted the innocent girl's adorable head.

"I didn't have sex with him! There was no sex." As Naruto scurried to his feet to defend himself he saw the younger Uchiha pass the rowdy room with a scowl plastered on his face. "Sasuke," he called, but the young raven didn't stop walking. Naruto ran after him and looped his hands around Sasuke's bicep pulling him to his aid. "Sasuke, help me convince them I didn't sleep with your perverted brother." Naruto said with a nervous laugh.

"Let go." The brunette growled.

This took Naruto by surprise and he loosened his grip. "W-what?"

Sasuke ripped his arm from the blonde's grasp. A small squeal shot past Naruto's lips at the quick motion. The brunette turned and glared heatedly at the younger male. "Don't fucking touch me."

Naruto froze in his gaze. The hate that radiated from his eyes sent chills running through the boy's nerves. He lifted a hand and desperately held his other arm to keep from crumbling under the Uchiha's stare. He bit his lower lip and averted cerulean blue eyes to the immaculate tile decorating the floor. He couldn't control his heart from pounding loudly in his ears. The pain that flooded his body left him speechless and crippled.

Sasuke continued to glare at the younger boy who began to fold in to himself. The look of hurt was evidently painted on his tan features. He didn't even try and conceal it. His blonde hair fell over his shoulder and shadowed his face as he turned away from Sasuke. A pang echoed in the brunette's heart and he growled before stomping away heatedly.

Naruto lifted his head and stared after the retreating Sasuke. Sakura, Kiba, and Hinata were all peeking out from the archway into the lounge room. "We should see if he's okay…" Sakura whispered to her friends.

Itachi shook his head. "I'll go. You guys can go do you job." He said with a playful smirk.

Kiba and Sakura nervously laughed while Hinata simply nodded. The couple retreated first while Sakura hung back with Itachi. She placed a comforting hand on his bicep. "Be careful." The raven gave the pinkette a questioning look. A small smile graced her rosy lips. "You love her." She stated matter-of-factly.

He shook his head and gave her a small smirk. "No, I love him."

Shock erupted on Sakura's face at the sudden confession. "H-him?"

Itachi chuckled softly and placed a reassuring hand on Sakura's that still hovered over his arm. "It's fine. I already know Sakura. You don't need to pretend with me."

She studied him with a raised eyebrow. "You've changed since I first met you."

At that statement the brunette pulled back his hand and smirked seductively at her. "Maybe not that much." He purred with a wink.

Sakura rolled her eyes at the man. Her gaze shifted towards Naruto who still stood motionless in the hallway staring after Sasuke who had long left his sight. "Please be gentle with him. He's fragile."

Itachi nodded before walking up toward the younger boy. He placed a hand on the smaller tan shoulder and gave a seductive smirk. "Naru, come and play…" He whispered in the blonde's ear. When his companion didn't react to his touch he let his hand slide. "Naru?" He questioned with a stern voice. Itachi leaned forward in order to hinder Naruto's line of sight. His dark charcoal eyes widened at the scene.

Naruto stood rigid in the same spot he had been glued to for the past five minutes. His eyes were dazed and lifeless but the tears still managed to pool from his cerulean irises. "Itachi…" The weak blonde whispered, "I don't understand why I'm crying." He admitted before covering his dampened face with his hands. Shocks racked his body as he tried to control his sobs.

Stupid brother, Itachi thought to himself as he watched the blonde slowly collapse into himself. He combed his hand through the blonde's wig and pulled him into his chest. Naruto didn't question the action or cease his sobbing. He let the tears soak into the soft black fabric that suffocated him. He wrapped his tan arms around the taller man and buried his face deeper as the sobs overtook him. Itachi rested his chin on the crown of the wig and took a deep breath as he held the boy.

The door slammed loudly making Kakashi's papers jump in surprise. His mask hung around his neck revealing pale, flawless skin. The silver-haired man simply took a sip of his scotch that sat next to him and looked up at the enraged Uchiha. "Ah, Sasuke, it's a pleasure." He raised his glass in greeting before taking another swig.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Sasuke growled.

The masked man's eyebrow rose at the vague question. He set the glass down with a distinct clink of ice against glass. "I'm sorry… tell you what?"

"About Naruto Uzumaki." His glare hardened at his silver-haired guardian.

"Ah." Kakashi acknowledged. With a sigh he pushed himself up from his desk and walked over to his alcohol cabinet. "This surprises you?"

"We have a fucking cross-dresser in our house!" He sneered.

"That is the only thing that bothers you about this situation?" He pawed through the many different shaped bottles looking for a specific one in particular.

Sasuke's eyes darkened. "Itachi…" He growled.

"Excuse me?" Kakashi asked as he pulled a solid colored sea foam green bottle with transparent dark blue swirls dancing around the sides and up the spout. Slivers of silver accented the beautiful blue as it danced on the bottle.

"He has no standards. That faggot is going to ruin the Uchiha name."

"Ah, I see." Kakashi twisted off the silver top and skillfully poured a dark brown liquid into a glass.

Sasuke watched him with furrowed brows. "You're having another drink."

"Oh, this isn't for me." The silver haired man stated calmly. He handed the drink to the pissed off raven.

Ivory fingers encircled the glass. He studied the liquid with a distasteful sneer. "What is this?"

"Something special. Think of it as a metaphor."

"You giving me alcohol is a metaphor?"

Kakashi sighed. "No, the alcohol itself." He flipped the bottle in his hands and displayed it before Sasuke. "When you see this bottle what do you initially think?"

Sasuke stepped closer to the man and ran his fingers along the smooth surface. "It has beautiful craftsmanship."

Kakashi nodded. "Someone put a lot of effort into making this bottle. As a matter of fact no two bottles of this liquor is the same. The brewers believe that quality is better than quantity so only a few bottles are made a year."

"You're lecturing me on liquor."

"Not quite. Try it."

"It looks disgusting." Sasuke's nose wrinkled at the sight.

"But the bottle is so beautiful; you aren't at least going to try. Such effort was put into making it."

Sasuke's head shot up and he glared at the man. "This is your metaphor."

"What are you talking about?" Kakashi asked calmly.

"Naruto is encased in a beautiful costume right, but his insides are not what I expected, so this lesson is supposed to get me over that."

Kakashi sighed and leaned against the bar. "No, that's not what I was-"

A growl escaped Sasuke's throat as he clenched the glass in his hands. He pulled his hand back and threw it with as much force as he could manage. It hit the wall with a loud crash. The dark brown liquid stained the walls as shards of glass littered the floor. "Don't patronize me, Kakashi. I want him out of this house. "

Sasuke turned to leave. Kakashi violently slammed him fist on the top of the bar. Dark eyes turned on the masked man. "I will not agree to your demands, Sasuke."

"What?" He hissed angrily.

Dull eyes stared into Sasuke's fiery irises. "Despite the fact that you are unhappy with this new discovery your brother is not. I'll admit, for a good chunk of time I was rooting for you to end up with Naruto, but now I can see you are not worthy of him."

Sasuke's fingers wrapped around the collar of Kakashi's dark gray sweater and held him close almost spitting venom. "Fuck you, Kakashi."

"Itachi and Naruto will be happy without you in the picture." He stated dully to the fuming raven.

Sasuke released his hold on the man. "I'm sure they will be." He whispered. Before leaving he grabbed the spout of the beautiful bottle and left. Kakashi turned back to his desk, ignoring the crunch of broken glass under his feet, and took another swig of his scotch. The condensation from the glass left a noticeable ring on the wooden surface.

Itachi gently pulled off Naruto's shoes and placed them to the side of his bed. After the blonde had fallen asleep in Itachi's arms he carried the smaller boy to his room to let him sleep comfortable. There was a noticeable red puffiness around his eyes and tear stains down his cheeks. But even as the older male placed a blanket over him he didn't stir.

The raven silently sat and watched his chest fall up and down in an even pattern. His fingers itched to touch him, and who was he to deny these primal needs. With a small smile he brushed away a few strands of golden hair from his tanned face and chuckled as he buried even deeper into the pillows. His skin radiated a heat that was almost tantalizing. Itachi's fingers hovered over Naruto's soft skin daring to further touch the vulnerable boy beneath the covers.

A loud knock at his door knocked the man from his senses. He quickly pulled back his hand and stared at his tingling fingertips. He ran his hands through his hair with a deep sigh. Another round of knocks sounded in the large room. Naruto stirred under the covers. Itachi leisurely climbed off the edge of the bed and walked to the door.

As he pulled it open dark, glaring eyes greeted him. "He's in there isn't he?" The younger Uchiha spat angrily.

Itachi stepped out of his door and pulled it close with a soundless click. "That's why you treated him so horribly?"

"Excuse me."

Itachi smirked. "You found out Naru's secret."

The scoff that left Sasuke's mouth seemed pained in a sense. Itachi studied his brother as he glared at him. The emotions dancing in his eyes were more than just hate, but Itachi didn't want to admit what he saw to Sasuke or himself. "It's disgusting."

"Is it?"

"How can you protect him? He lied to us. Came into our house and played us for a fool."

Itachi smirked. "You really think like that?"

"I'm confused why you don't."

Itachi leaned against the door with his arms folded across his chest. "Sasuke, you're a fool."

The sound of glass squeaking caught Itachi's attention. He looked down to his brother's hand and saw the bottle clenched tightly in his hands. Dark eyes widened. "Kakashi gave you that?"

Sasuke's gaze fell down to the bottle before he snapped back up to his brother. "What does it matter?"

The older Uchiha let out a pained chuckle. "He's still voting for you." He muttered almost inaudibly.

"What did you say?"

Itachi gripped the doorknob and turned it gently. "Sasuke, I will not give up."

"What are you talking about?"

A sad smile stretched across Itachi's lips. "You are a lucky fool, moron." He escaped into his room leaving Sasuke outside his door with a confused expression on his face.

Itachi sat on the bed and watched the blonde angel silently slumber. It must have been hours before those gentle blue eyes opened. Itachi couldn't help but smile as dazed eyes greeted the world. "Good morning." Itachi smirked beautifully.

Naruto turned to look at the man and smiled in return. "Morning." He mumbled. The Uchiha's usually dark façade softened at the smile. Naruto sat up with a giant stretch and yawn. "How long have I been sleeping."

"A couple hours," The Uchiha responded, "You were tired."

"I guess so." Naruto laughed. Itachi's gaze fell to the ground as he toyed with the fabric on the blanket. A confused expression panted itself on the blonde's face. "Itachi, are you okay?"

"I've never been nervous before." The older Uchiha mumbled just loud enough for Naruto to hear. His dark eyes immediately turned to Naruto's blue ones. The blonde noticed the strange amount of vulnerability dancing in those obsidian orbs. His pale hands reached up and gently caressed Naruto's tanned cheeks.

A bright blush spread across the bridge of his nose. "H-hey, what are you-"

His question was immediately cut off when Itachi's soft lips pressed against his own. Surprise shot through the blonde's body as Itachi moved his soft lips against his. His first impulse was to fight him off, tell him no, but for some reason he didn't have the strength to do so. Instead, the feeling that conquered that initial surprise felt nice and comforting. It made the lonely feeling in his heart from Sasuke's hostility earlier fade away.

Itachi's hands weeded themselves in Naruto's blonde wig, but the blonde hardly noticed the slight pull of hair pins falling as Itachi deepened the kiss. His tongue dipped softly into the blonde's mouth eagerly tasting the sweet saliva that flooded his mouth. Itachi smiled into the kiss as he left a single pin holding the wig on. His skillful fingers danced along Naruto's spine until he found the man's zipper to his dress. In one fluid motion he had unzipped it. This had gained Naruto's attention. He pulled away from the man with flushed cheeks. His rapid panting created an incorrigible hunger rumbling in Itachi. "Please, stop." Naruto begged gently.

No more hiding, Itachi thought to himself as he unsnapped the bra that held Naruto's fake bust in place. The blonde crossed his arms over his chest as his face turned five shades redder than before.

"Itachi, please…" With a soft reassuring smile he folded his hands back into the blonde's hair and pulled out the final pin before gently sliding the wig off revealing shorter spiky blonde tresses. Naruto's eyes widened. "I-I can explain."

Itachi leaned in closer and placed a chaste kiss on the blonde's exposed forehead. "Shush, Naruto." Naruto's already wide eyes somehow managed to get wider as Itachi caught his lips in another kiss. Pale hands glided through his short spiky hair and down his exposed neck. Itachi's lips trailed down Naruto's jawline, then his neck, traveling over every place his hands had previously been.

Itachi tore off the dress and bra leaving Naruto exposed in nothing but white knee high tights and a pair of boy cut girl's underwear. Itachi pulled back to look at the embarrassed teen laying in front of him with a hungry smile. He etched the vision of the half-nude boy into his mind before impatiently catching the blonde's lips with his once more.

Sasuke sat on his bed cradling the bottle in his hands. He studied the glass with a sullen expression on his face. Kakashi was an idiot, trying to teach him some important life lesson. With a loud sigh Sasuke flopped on his bed while the bottle lay next to him; teasing him. Sasuke closed his eyes, and almost immediately after he did flashes of the blonde invaded his mind. How he had wrapped his injured hand up with the torn fabric of his shirt; when he carried his too his room because of the injury to his foot. The kisses he stole from an unwilling Naru. Would he still be unwilling? Sasuke shot up with a growing frustration evident on his face. What is wrong with me? Sasuke thought to himself. He looked over to the bottle. "I just need to get drunk."

He swiped the bottle from the cushioned bed and unfastened the top before taking three big swigs. The liquid flooded his mouth and traveled down his throat easily. A sweet flavor resembling sugar mixed with the spicy tang of cinnamon attacked his taste buds brutally. The mix of flavors left him smiling gently into the glass spout. The immediate warmth that overtook his body made him stop drinking and stare at the ceiling with a calm look. He growled to himself. "Godamnit Kakashi, I would have been fine without it." He mumbled as he studied the bottle once more.

The seemingly bitter liquid inside this beautiful bottle was surprisingly sweet, and warming. Just like Naruto always. Kakashi noticed the changed in Sasuke even before he, himself, did. Naruto always had a way of melting his walls, making him feel complete. Sasuke didn't want to admit it too himself, so he fought the feeling and used his jealousy over his brother and insecurity to bully the boy, or at that time girl. When he had found out the true identity of the boy it was a shock, and what pissed the Uchiha off most of all was the fact that despite the discovery he couldn't push out the feeling that was overtaking his mind. When he saw the blonde it was a rush of happiness. He looked at his pinky as it gently tingled at the thought of their promise of friendship. His heart panged painfully in his chest. "Shit…" he cursed at himself. He left the bottle forgotten on the carpet as it leaked away its meaning in the plush rug. The bedroom door shut with a bang.

Naruto calmly lay in Itachi's bed with a baggy pair of his pajama pants tied tightly on his slim waist. His tan skin clashed with the deep red of Itachi's comforter, but he didn't care as he studied the intricate designs on the ceiling. Itachi was next to him with an arm over his eyes and smile on his face. He was also only clothed in a pair of pajama pants, his muscular torso available for Naruto to admire.

The blonde gently massaged the small hickey on his neck before looking at Itachi. "You didn't have to leave marks."

"It was a sign of possession."

The blonde playfully glared at the older man. "I don't belong to anyone."

Itachi immediately rolled over on top of the shorter male and smirked as he caressed the tanned check. His dark hair fell over the blonde; tickling him in the places they touched. Their noses were a few millimeters apart. Naruto could feel Itachi's breath fog over him as he leaned down. The blonde's heartbeat began to speed at the close contact.

A knock at the door went unnoticed between the two. Only when the door opened did it catch their attention. Blue eyes turned to the doorway in embarrassment, and it only got worse when they clashed with surprised obsidian orbs.