A/N: Okay, so here you go, Royal Pair. A looong one shot. And I'm so proud of it, gosh! I really, really like it, hope you'll do too ;) As for the title, I paraphrased a bit one of Atobe's techniques, insead of Rondo to Destruction, it's Road, which I thing suits this fanfiction rather well. So n'joy! :)
When Ryoma woke up in the morning, he was alone. Again. He just lied there, staring at the pillow next to his, with a hand outstretched over the empty space. Recently there was no day he wouldn't wake up alone in the empty, cold king-sized bed. He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. It wasn't that he wanted to cuddle or something, but he needed to know that the man he loved was there. He wanted for once to wake up and see the sleeping face adorned by the longish purple-silver hair, the falling and raising chest. He wanted to feel his lover's breath on his face and know that he was there for him. That there really wasn't anything more important than their relationship.
'Baka Monkey King,' he sighed, turning over and staring at the ceiling.
They've been together for quite some time now, but in all that time Ryoma could count the times Keigo stayed in bed till he woke up on the fingers of one hand. Was it really too much to ask? Ryoma knew that his boyfriend was a very important person and that by leading a chain of companies all over Japan and the branches overseas he had a lot of work. Like really a lot. And he understood that he had to oversee everything on his own. Ryoma wouldn't allow anyone to touch his tennis equipment either. If you wanted something done well, you had to do it yourself. That's what he believed.
And that's what Keigo believed. At times Ryoma wished he didn't. Like right now. He felt alone, more alone than he felt in America, where he lived most of the year. As a pro tennis player and the Grand Slam champion at the young age of 22, Ryoma was a well-known celebrity and had many adoring fans. Sometimes he got marriage proposals from some delusional girl or even boy. Yet he refused them all, because he had Keigo. Keigo, who wasn't with him even when he came to Japan for a few weeks.
He sighed again, feeling more weight on his heart than he did in months. Taking his eyes off of the ceiling, he rolled off of the bed and froze. There, on the night table near his side of the bed was a purple rose with a note attached to it. Furrowing his brow in wonder, Ryoma took it carefully. 'I love you' it said. He sighed for the umpteenth time today.
'If you think this is enough, you're completely wrong, Monkey King,' he crushed the note and stood up, heading for the bathroom.
What was this stupid boyfriend of his thinking anyway? That he'll leave some flower and Ryoma would faint from happiness? He wondered if he mattered at all to him. Ryoma didn't want presents, didn't want roses, chocolates, or anything really, that Keigo bought with money he earned by not being with him. He wanted them to just be together, spend time, like normal couples do. Not this routine they had. Every day, or rather night, Keigo came back home around two in the morning, they had sex and went to sleep. And when Ryoma woke up, he was already gone.
Ryoma took off his clothes and, dumping them in a heap on the floor, looked at himself in the mirror. He was tired, he could clearly see that in his eyes, which usually were glowing with strength, but now were dimmed to a caricature of what they used to be. His hair was longer, since recently he decided to grow them out. Now when he played, he could easily pull them in a very short ponytail. He was rather tall, thanks to Inui-senpai's balanced diet and litres of milk he drunk through his junior high years. He was slim and well-built, muscles were clearly visible under his skin, he wasn't the Grand Slam champion for nothing.
A large, red mark on his neck caught his attention. Ryoma's eye twitched in anger, while his fingers traced the teeth marks contrasting with his sun-kissed complexion. He asked Keigo not to leave any marks… Sighing again, he stepped into the shower. There was no use in being angry now. What's done, is done. He switched the hot water on, he liked how the water licked his skin like fire and made his blood boil, waking him up from the slumber he was always in in the mornings.
As he stood under the rays of fire, his mind drifted to Keigo once again…
He won. He won the title. Ryoma's mind was blank from pure shock and happiness. The people watching his match were in a mad frenzy, jumping, clapping and screaming at him, but he was deaf to all of them. The only thing he could think about right now were his hands, which trembled with excitement at the accomplished dream. He looked up to the sky and a beautiful smile blossomed on his face. A true smile, a smile which showed his whole soul to the world. He did it. He surpassed his father, he kept his promise. Just as was his father's last wish. 'You're happy in there, right, oyaji?' he thought, smiling at the sky.
A hand on his shoulder brought him back from the dreamland. Ryoma lowered his eyes and was shocked to find Atobe Keigo right before him, with a gentle smile and eyes shining with joy. He didn't know that the Monkey King was even capable of such an expression.
'Congratulations, brat,' his voice rattled some part inside Ryoma, as it always did, making him want to throw the closest thing at the man and then smash his own head into a wall. 'It was a very good match. Your best this season, I'd have to say.'
'Oh?' Ryoma smirked. 'You've been watching my games? Obsessive much, Monkey King?' With a satisfied glint to his eyes he watched as Atobe's eye twitched and the smile disappeared from his face. The hand than was still resting on his shoulder tightened its grip.
'You're still as arrogant as you were all those years ago, brat,' Atobe snorted, letting go of his shoulder.
Ryoma smirked again. He didn't know why, but seeing an old rival here, in this place of all possible, made him giddy with excitement. He remembered how every time the two of them played, they would bet something insane on the line and the thrill coming from that gamble was something he looked for in every one of his games since.
'It's Ryoma, you know,' his smirk grew sharper at the shock that appeared in the other's eyes. 'My name.'
'I know your name, brat!' Oh, how Ryoma loved to see people get rattled at his provocative, arrogant responses. 'We're not close enough for me to use your name.'
'Whatever, Monkey King,' he shrugged, but his eyes shone with glee, as he turned his back on the man. 'I'm hungry, want to grab a bite with me?'
Looking over his shoulder at the stunned Atobe, he couldn't help it anymore. Breaking into a fit of snickers, he caught his old rival's elbow and dragged him along, not daring to take a glance at the sulking face, since he would have just fallen down from laughing too hard. Ah, he missed it, this feeling…
Now Ryoma knew that it all was planned from the beginning. Keigo wasn't there on a delegation, as he claimed to be. He was there, because he was in love with him then. And Ryoma believed it. They spent quite a lot of time together then, and when Keigo had to go back to Japan, a single word from him was enough to make him stay. Right now Ryoma didn't believe he would, even if he lowered himself to begging. Even though he didn't look like this hurt him at all, it did, it hit the softest, most vulnerable spot inside him.
Shutting off the water, Ryoma stepped out of the shower. Drying himself quickly, he left the bathroom, tying the towel on his hips. He looked around for his phone and jumped on the bed after grabbing it. He picked the number and pressed the phone to his ear. After the third signal someone picked up and a low 'yes?' made Ryoma smile lightly.
'Mitsu-buchou,' he said in greeting. 'Do you have some free time today? I'm in Japan, so I thought we could play a bit.'
The answer made his smile wider. He always liked his captain. Maybe it was because the man was so quiet, or maybe because he didn't take shit from anyone, including his little, bratty self, or maybe because sometimes they were so alike, they could pass of as brothers. It didn't matter much to Ryoma, he just wanted to spend time with the people he loved as his own family, and who loved him back as the youngest and most precious of them.
'Then see you in a while,' he answered and ended the call.
It was always like that. Every time he called, Mitsu-buchou would leave everything just to meet him. Ryoma didn't want to impose on him, but that was how they were. And if it was Mitsu-buchou who wanted to see him, he would drop everything and be at his side the fastest he could. Ryoma smiled a bit sadly. Why couldn't his own boyfriend act like that once in a while? Even if he called him, all he would get would be a lengthy explanation of how busy Keigo was.
A painful grip on his heart, lessened slightly by thoughts of his former captain, returned with full force. With shoulders dropped dejectedly, Ryoma got off of the bed and put on the first clothes he got his hands on. Slipping his phone into his back pocket, he looked back at the messed up sheets. Why did he even bother to wait for him? Every night, he waited like any faithful wife would for her husband.
But they weren't in that kind of relationship. He didn't have the ring on his finger tying him to Keigo. Actually, he didn't have any kind of ring anywhere. And that meant no guarantee for the future. It wasn't like he really wanted to get married, or have that ring as a reminder. He wanted to be sure that Keigo loved him as much as he was loved. Only that.
A sudden thought made Ryoma freeze with his hand on the door knob. What if…? No! He shook his head desperately. There was no way it could be possible. He grit his teeth and, grabbing his tennis bag firmly, shut the door after himself. There was just no way Keigo would cheat on him. Right…?
'Mitsu-buchou!' Ryoma smiled, heading over to where the tall man stood, talking with someone whom Ryoma couldn't clearly see.
Both of them turned at the sound of his voice and his smile grew even wider when he recognized the second person. Dropping his bag near the bench, he came up to them and hugged the brunet standing with his arms spread invitingly. He closed his eyes, still smiling at the chuckling he heard near his ear. A hand that was combing his hair in a slow, soothing motion made his heart warm up and cleared his mind of all worry. How he loved this peaceful feeling…
'I see someone really missed me,' came the silky voice of the man, who was hugging him closely.
'Mou…' Ryoma let go of the man with a slight pout, but couldn't help it and broke into a smile a second after. 'You missed me just as much, Shuu-senpai, admit it.'
'Of course I did,' the man smiled in return, a real, happy smile, not the usual fake. 'After all, Ryo-chan will always be our precious baby.'
Rolling his eyes with a soft smile, Ryoma turned to his former captain. The man looked just as he did during their junior high and high school days. Only now he had a small, really small, the tiniest smile on his face. But Ryoma, so used to Mitsu-buchou's facial expressions didn't have any problems in spotting it.
'Let's play, Ryoma,' even though he left the pro circuit some time ago due to an injury, he still was a formidable opponent, Ryoma knew.
And they played. It wasn't as exciting as it used to be, but they both loved tennis and they loved playing against each other. For a second Ryoma thought that Mitsu-buchou would use his finishing technique, Zero-Shiki Drop Shot, but then he remembered his broken shoulder and his mind drifted away once again this day. Because Keigo was one of the reasons why it happened. Because of that day, in the Kanto Tournament, his captain put his pride on the line. As much as Ryoma loved his boyfriend, that day was taboo for him, he never wanted to relive it again. The pain at seeing the man he so admired turn his back on everything for the sake of his team was still fresh. And the pain he felt now was too much for him to handle.
Ryoma dropped his racquet, not even seeing the ball anymore. His eyes stared blindly at Mitsu-buchou, while the memories of Keigo flashed through his mind like a waterfall. Their first kiss, first date, first night together, his laugh, every glint in his eyes, the feeling of his soft hair under his hand, his sleeping face next to his own… A hand on his shoulder brought him out of his daze. Through eyes blurred with unshed tears he saw the concerned gaze Mitsu-buchou sent him.
'Are you okay, Ryoma?' he asked and the caring and gentleness made Ryoma's throat tighten.
'No…' his voice was hoarse, as if he was about to cry. But he didn't. He couldn't. He wouldn't. 'I'm far from okay…'
'Come, let's talk,' Mitsu-buchou picked his racquet and, encircling his shoulders with his arm, led them to where Shuu-senpai was sitting.
When they got under the large tree, the brunet looked up from his camera to greet them with a smile, which disappeared the second he got a clear look at Ryoma's eyes. Without a word he pulled him close, stroking his hair in an attempt to soothe him. Sighing with exhaustion, Ryoma allowed himself to be cuddled and tried to free his mind of any thoughts related to his boyfriend.
'Tell us what is troubling you, Ryo-chan,' Shuu-senpai whispered softly to him. 'We want to help you, if we can.'
'It's Keigo,' he mumbled, moving out of the warm embrace. He looked down at his knees. He was tired, of this day, of this anxiety, of this constant loneliness.
'Then I probably shouldn't give you this?' Shuu-senpai handed him a can of grape Ponta, which had a note attached to it. 'I went to buy myself a drink and it was already here when I got back.'
Ryoma sighed, suspecting what the note had to say. Weighing the can in his hand, he wondered if he should just throw it away. Feeling even more miserable than before, he opened the note and his heart clenched painfully. The same 'I love you' as in the one this morning stared at him mockingly. Empty words… A bitter smile appeared on his face, though his eyes were now dead.
'I think he's cheating on me,' he said softly.
A shocked silence was the only response he got. Sighing yet again, he laid on the grass, staring up at the sky. There was no other explanation for Keigo's behaviour. He was distanced, cold even, he saw him only at night and then he was gone. One word came to Ryoma's mind to describe what he was to Keigo right now. A whore. He felt sick.
'That's not possible, Ryoma,' Mitsu-buchou tried to reason with him, but it was useless. He didn't want to believe that himself, but there was just no better answer. 'Who would he do that with?'
'I don't know,' he replied, shrugging. 'I don't care,' he knew he couldn't take any more of it. He was at the end of his patience. No more…
'I am going to kill him,' a cold shiver run down Ryoma's back at the murderous tone of Shuu-senpai's voice. 'Slowly, painfully… And before he dies, he will apologize to you.'
Freezing cerulean eyes locked with his own and Ryoma knew that this wasn't a joke, that if he wanted it, Shuu-senpai would really be able to do it. A sudden image of Keigo laying in a pool of blood jumped before his eyes, freezing his heart solid. Even after everything, he still… loved him…
'Please, don't…' his voice was shaky, eyes filled with tears once again. 'I don't want to see him hurt…'
'Oh, Ryo-chan,' he was gathered into Shuu-senpai's arms and all he could do was cling to him and cry his heart out.
Because he loved this bastard he called his boyfriend. Even though it hurt, even though he was doubting himself, them, their whole relationship. He still loved him. 'I'm such an idiot,' Ryoma thought, sobbing into Shuu-senpai's shirt. 'A complete and utter idiot.'
The first thing Ryoma noticed when he opened the door to the flat, more like a luxurious penthouse, he shared with Keigo, was a soft meow near his feet. Surprised, he looked down and a radiant smile graced his lips. Karupin, his beloved cat, was the only being on the whole Earth, who could bring out this kind of smile on his face. Not even his parents, not even his friends, not even Keigo could do that. Closing the door behind him, he kneeled down, opening his arms for the little ball of fur to jump into. With a delighted chuckle he caught Karupin, pulling her close to his chest and scratching her just as she liked, behind her left ear.
When she started to purr in response to his petting, his mind finally fully registered the situation. Why was she here? He was sure he left her with Kevin in America. Furrowing his brow, Ryoma tried to explain how did a cat cross the ocean on its own, but nothing possible came to his mind. Nothing, until his hand found a piece of paper attached to Karupin's collar. His stomach clenched uncomfortably, dreading what was to come. Another 'I love you' made his throat tighten and eyes water with tears. What was Keigo doing? Didn't he realize that it would only hurt him more? Breathing deeply to calm himself, Ryoma closed his eyes. He didn't want to do this. He was trembling with fear and exhaustion at the mere thought. But it was better to end it. He would be stronger than Keigo, he would set him free.
Clearing his mind the best he could, Ryoma set Karupin down and got up from the floor. He didn't notice it earlier, too preoccupied with his cat, but the path to the master bedroom was paved with rose petals. He brushed a trembling hand through his hair. 'This was so much like Keigo,' Ryoma thought, 'Ignore me, discard me, make me wait till I lose my mind and then throw a bouquet of roses in the air and everything's alright.' A bitter smile appeared on his lips as he uncaringly crushed the petals under his feet. Just like Keigo tried to crush him.
Opening the door to their bedroom, Ryoma had to restrain the sudden urge to laugh hysterically. Dozens of candles shrouded the room with their warm, dimmed light. How romantic… Feeling as if his heart was about to be ripped to pieces, he quickly located all his things in the room. There wasn't much, since he got here only a few days ago. Grabbing the magazines from the table, he threw them into his bag, which was still standing near his side of the bed. Next were the few clothes he left here and there.
Ryoma froze for a second, hearing the bathroom door open. He didn't even look that way. He couldn't. He knew that if he did, he would fail, and that he couldn't allow to happen. He didn't know how long it was before Keigo said something, but for him it was the longest time of his life. He felt as if he was drowning, as if the air itself was suffocating him.
'What are you doing, Ryoma?' Keigo's voice was calm, which made the pain that much more unbearable.
'I'm moving out,' he answered, trying to sound as bored as always. 'We're over.'
Another long silence stung him right into his heart. Keigo didn't care, he simply didn't care enough about him, about them, to try and fight. Withholding the tears with seer power of his will, Ryoma threw the last things into his bag, zipping it shut. His hand was trembling as he pulled the bag over his shoulder and walked past Keigo on his way to the door.
'I hope we won't see each other again,' he said, his voice was hoarse, but he was glad anything came out of his clenched throat at all.
And then he left. A soft click of the door was his last straw. Tears withheld for so long streamed down his face and he couldn't stop the sobs from escaping through his lips. He slowly made his way towards the front door, not even noticing Karupin, who was following him faithfully. He was just about to lay his hand on the doorknob, when suddenly he was turned around rather forcefully and faced with shocked and confused Keigo.
'What are you doing, Ryoma?' two hands gently cupped his face, wiping the tears away. 'What is this?'
Ryoma sighed, all his barriers were down, he was feeling like a complete mess. 'I'm giving you the freedom you need.'
'What freedom?' even more confusion appeared on that royal face. 'What are you talking about?'
'You have someone else, I'm giving you the freedom to be happy with that person,' midsentence the tears streamed again and left marks not only on his face, but also on Keigo's hands.
'I don't know where you got that idea from, but there is no one else,' Keigo's eyes burned into his and Ryoma gasped as something stirred in his chest at that. 'Here.' Keigo let go og his face and reached to his pocket, from which he took out a small black box. Ryoma watched through his blurred with tears eyes as his boyfriend knelt before him, and looked up, opening the box. 'I wanted to ask you to marry me,' Ryoma didn't even spare a glance at the ring, too focused on not fainting on the spot. This was just too much. 'There never was anyone but you, and if you'll agree, there never will be.'
Ryoma was lightheaded. Everything seemed to make sense, the notes, all his favourite things, Ponta, Karupin, Keigo got her here for him, the roses, candles, everything to make this moment, this question perfect. The pieces of a puzzle finally started to fall into their respective places. All but one.
'Then tell me,' he focused on composing himself, making the tears stop. 'why were you so cold? Why did you ignore me like that? Why did you leave every morning before I even woke up?'
He didn't make any accusations. He was too tired to argue. He just wanted to know. A good reason, a good explanation he could believe in. Something that will finally give him the peace of mind he so longed after.
'It was all a test,' Keigo answered, visibly relieved that the crying stopped. 'I wanted to see how long you would be able to stay by my side. And you passed.'
He smiled at Ryoma, as if he won the main prize in some lottery. But for Ryoma the whole world turned black. His mind shut off completely, only one word replaying in it with thousands of echoes. He was frozen in shock and even the numbness of it couldn't stop the sudden pain that flashed through his heart.
'A test…?' he whispered through his trembling lips.
Everything he felt till now was just a test. He was played, ruthlessly, carelessly, thoughtlessly. His emotions, everything that he though he felt was only for the sake of testing him. His loneliness, his suffering, his tears, his worry. How he felt betrayed, ignored, not needed. Everything was fake. For Keigo. But for Ryoma it was too real. He was used. By the person he loved more than his own happiness. When he looked at Keigo, he knew he didn't have any idea what he did. He wouldn't, of course.
'I will not marry you, Keigo,' he said, feeling his heart rip into tiny pieces. He couldn't take any more of it. 'because it shows me how little you care about me.'
And with that he turned around and left, without looking back at the still kneeling, shocked Keigo.
Ryoma sighed, turning to the other side of the bed, not feeling sleepy at all, even though he hadn't slept the whole night through in a long time. It's been three weeks since he left Keigo and still he couldn't forget the hopeful and desperate at the same time expression on Keigo's face, when he asked Ryoma to marry him. It hurt so much… It hurt, because he still loved him. Even though he was betrayed in the worst way possible, he still loved him.
Ryoma shut his eyes close, feeling the tears rising up and threatening to fall. He clenched his teeth. He won't cry, not anymore. Throughout these few weeks he cried more than he did during his whole life and to tell the truth he was too tired to start again. Another sigh escaped him, as he opened his eyes, trying to focus on anything but his thoughts. As always these days it proved to be too difficult a challenge.
His mind drifted to that night he knocked on Shuu-senpai and Mitsu-buchou's door. He remembered the look in these cerulean eyes when they locked on him after opening the door. Understanding, pity, fury, concern. Ryoma didn't know how it happened, or when, but Shuu-senpai became a true brother to him, someone he could trust with everything. The whole night he spent crying into his shoulder, the only thing coming from his mouth other than sobs was 'Keigo'. His heart was broken, his mind a complete mess. And when he finally fell asleep, the nightmares begun. He remembered Shuu-senpai's hands, gently trying to soothe him, but all they did was remind him of the warmth he never got from Keigo, and that now, he never will.
Ryoma felt his throat tighten dangerously.
'Ryo-chan?' he froze for a second before turning towards the voice. 'I knocked, but you didn't answer.'
Shuu-senpai smiled thinly, coming closer and sitting on the edge of the bed. His hand automatically found its way to Ryoma's hair, stroking it lovingly. They looked each other in the eye and Ryoma knew why his former teammate was there.
'Keigo…' his voice trembled, it always did when he said his name.
'Aa,' a short nod from the brunet was all he needed as a confirmation. 'He's here again. He wants to talk.'
'Why should I care what he wants, if he clearly doesn't care about me?' Ryoma shrugged. How many times did Keigo come here in the last three weeks? He even lost count. 'I don't want to see him.'
'You know that he won't stop coming, if you don't talk to him,' Shuu-senpai's voice was warm and Ryoma felt grateful for a friend like him, who would do everything for him. 'Stop running away, Ryoma.'
With that he left, leaving the room in complete silence and stunning Ryoma to the core. It's been a long while since he was called by his full name, a long while. And that meant that Shuu-senpai was serious, deadly serious. Sitting up on the bed, Ryoma looked at his hands. It was true, he was running away. From the pain, from all the hurt, from Keigo. But what was most important, he was running away from his feelings. From the love he still felt.
Keigo was sitting by the table in the kitchen, eating his favourite spaghetti bolognese with fresh parmesan cheese, when he entered the house after one of his training sessions. He dropped his tennis bag in the living room on his way over and took his shirt off, hanging it over his shoulder. It was hot outside and he was wet with sweat. Moving around his boyfriend, he got to the fridge and took out one delightedly cold can of grape Ponta. Popping it open, Ryoma didn't fail to notice how Keigo's hot gaze glued itself to his back. He smirked, drowning down his drink and finally turning to his boyfriend. A sudden devilish plan came to his mind.
'Ne, Monkey King,' he taunted, smirking wider when Keigo's brow twitched at the nickname.
'What is it, brat?' Ryoma knew he already won. There was just no way Keigo could win after lowering himself to Ryoma's level of play.
Moving sensually behind the table in his direction, Ryoma raised his hand up, placing it at the back of his boyfriend's neck, brining their faces only inches apart. Still smirking, he licked his lips, which made Keigo's eyes darken in lust. Opening his mouth, he slowly took a deep breath and said in a husky voice.
'I love you.'
He leaned in for a kiss, but in the last second he avoided Keigo's lips and skipped his arms, heading for the door. He smirked with pride at accomplishing his goal, when he heard a low growl behind him. Looking over his shoulder, he knew his eyes were glowing with a challenge, because in that moment Keigo's own shone like two diamonds underwater.
'Mada, mada dane, Keigo,' he taunted again and left to take a shower, knowing that he won't be taking it alone.
Ryoma smiled, but there was only sorrow and longing in his smile. He missed feeling mischievous, he missed challenging his boyfriend enough to occupy his mind and body for long hours. He missed these days when he still believed, when he could count on Keigo's presence by his side. These days he knew he was loved.
Standing up from the bed, Ryoma was surprised to find the room shrouded in darkness. He didn't feel the time flow past him at all. Not that he cared, either way. Sighing softly, he looked at the clock. It was 3AM, he wouldn't get any sleep tonight, he knew it. He was so tired of all this, it seemed as everything could harm him, bring pain.
Needing to get his mind off of these thoughts, he leaned his head against the cold window. And he froze, a sharp pang of pain flashing through his heart took his breath away. Even though it was the middle of the night, even though it was dark, even though he was standing with his back to the house, Ryoma knew. He would recognize this silhouette anywhere. Remembering to breathe, he took a deep breath, but the pain in his chest stayed the same.
'Keigo…' he whispered through his clenched throat.
Why was he even here? At this time? It almost seemed as if he cared, as if he didn't want to let go. Ryoma's heart withered with longing as he watched Keigo stand there, alone, in the cold, dark night, with his head bowed in despair. 'Stop running away,' said Shuu-senpai. Ryoma took a deep breath.
'Thank you,' he smiled lightly into the darkness, heading out through the door.
He won't run away any longer. This was his to be or not to be and he had to face it. He stepped down the stairs and not even bothering to put on his shoes, pushed the front door open. He knew Keigo noticed, but he wanted to see if he even understood why he reacted like that. Slowly making his way towards him, Ryoma took another deep breath to calm his racing heart. For a long while they just looked at each other, all the emotions clearly visible in their eyes. And Ryoma saw how hurt Keigo was, his regret, the determination to make everything right. He saw how much he was loved. But he couldn't let himself believe it. Not yet.
'What are you still doing here?' he asked in a quiet voice, fearing that if he was louder, Keigo would disappear.
'Ryoma, I'm sorry. I know I hurt you, but-' Keigo raised his arms in an attempt to embrace him, but Ryoma stepped back. It hurt. The look on Keigo's face, the tightening of his throat, the nails he bit into his palms to stop the tears. 'I'm sorry.'
'What are you sorry for?' his voice began to tremble. But he had to ask, he had to know. He wouldn't be able to move on without it.
'For hurting you,' Keigo raised his hand towards him. 'For doubting you, when you were all I've ever wanted. For ignoring you, making you cry, for making you feel lonely.' He stepped closer, and Ryoma noticed that his eyes were glazed over with tears. 'Basically, for being my egoistic, idiotic self.'
Ryoma stared at him, long, hard. He could see that Keigo meant every word he said. His eyes told him that. Was it okay to forgive him? He still loved him and he was loved back. Was it that simple? Just accept the apology and never feel this kind of pain again? Tears started to roll down his cheeks before he could think about stopping them. He loved that bastard with all his aching heart. He loved him, what else was there to say? Ryoma raised his trembling hand and put it in Keigo's. It was cold, so cold that Ryoma had half a mind to pull away. But he didn't, because this coldness showed him how much he was loved.
'I forgive you,' he whispered and, before he could blink, two strong arms closed around him, enveloping him in a warm embrace, which finally soothed his heart.
A low mantra of 'I love you's, which was coming from Keigo made him smile gently. This was it, this was what he wanted all along. The feeling of Keigo's warmth, his arms around him, his voice making every fibre of his being dance with joy. Sighing with relief, Ryoma buried his face in Keigo's shirt and closed his eyes. It was over, everything was over now. He could be happy again. He smiled from the bottom of his heart.
'Na, Ryoma…' Keigo's voice made him look up. When he did, he was met with a smile that made his heart beat so much faster. 'So… Will you marry me?'
He couldn't hold it in any longer. Ryoma burst out laughing, tears streaming down his face. But this time they were a symbol of his happiness, relief, love, not pain. He was so relieved, so happy that Keigo was there with him, near him, holding him, loving him. He wiped the tears away, still smiling. When he looked at Keigo, he saw a bit of worry and concern in his eyes. A lazy smirk graced Ryoma's lips, lighting his eyes.
'Mada, mada dane, Monkey King,' he said teasingly and placed a sweet, chaste kiss on Keigo's lips. 'Of course I will.'
Fluff ^^ 'Cause I don't know, I don't have the heart to break them up and to hurt them like that, sorry ;_; And they're soo OOC, gosh... But I love it, I'm proud of myself and of this fanfiction and of Ryoma and yes, Royal is a good pairing and they deserve to be happy. And I had to put Fuji in here, becuse I wanted to make Ryoma say 'Shuu-senpai', kyaaa~~
So, what do you think? Please review~
PS. I'm working on another Thrill one shot, get ready ;)