Dear Reader,

I'm sorry that you have come across this unfortunate account of my voyage on the RMS Titanic. Don't be alarmed though, this story remains fairly happy, though it is real. And we all know that sometimes real does not always mean happy.

Still, my hope is that you find a friend in this journal. And along with that I hope you will find love, goodness, humor and adventure as I did. God bless.

Cordially yours,

Emily Cross

April 10th 1912

Southampton, England

I glanced around the bustling port of Southampton. I felt completely out of place standing in the middle of all the commotion, barley moving while people around me shoved their way to board the massive ship that was RMS Titanic. A smartly dressed man pushed past me as he made his way to board upper class, not bothering to excuse himself. I didn't mind, and in fact I hardly noticed. I was too preoccupied searching the faces of the crowd.

I found myself checking the time on the large clock in the port again. Jack and Fabrizio were late in meeting me, as I had only guessed they would be. I sighed in annoyance, setting down my one suitcase that held all of my belongings and sat on top of it to wait. A few people looked down at me with snide expressions as they passed. I knew how silly I must have looked, sitting on my suitcase, in the middle of the port, all by my lonesome, my relaxed position an insult to ladies everywhere. I ignored them, crossing my legs and resting my chin on the palm of my hand. I checked the time on the clock for what seemed like the hundredth time.

"Emily!" A voice called from the crowd.

I jumped up from my suitcase, craning my neck to peer above heads and hats for my friends.

"Jack! Fabrizio!" I shouted across the port, waving my hand. More insults for the women, "I was beginning to think that you had forgotten about me."

Jack grinned, pushing his blonde hair out of his eyes as he approached. I couldn't stop the absurd smile on my face, feeling featherbrained in Jack's presence.

Stop it Emily, I scolded myself inwardly, Jack is your friend. Only your friend.

Even as I said it, I knew it was a lie. These last few months, my emotions for Jack had been mercurial. I couldn't stop the feelings for him that were budding inside me and yet I wanted them desperately to stop. We had a dear friendship, a friendship I didn't want to jeopardize all because of silly emotions.

Jack and I had been friends for some time. We had met in London a few years ago, when I was fifteen and he was seventeen. Jack had been doing sketches in exchange for housing and I had been living with my grandmother. Jack was a traveler though, and he moved his way across Europe during the years I had known him so I never saw very much of him. We kept in touch through letters. While I was stuck in London, in my grandmothers estate, Jack was out exploring. I lived through the words he wrote as he told me about drawing in Paris or the festivals in Spain, wishing I could be so adventurous. I kept every letter.

On the rare occasion that Jack visited London, we spent every waking moment together catching up before he ran off to explore another part of Europe.

That's how the four years of our friendship thrived. Only a year ago did Fabrizio De Rossi meet Jack, and in turn met me. Jack had been spending time in Italy when he met Fabrizio and the two quickly became thick as thieves. Jack convinced Fabrizio to join him in London, where he introduced me to Fabrizio. That had been mere months ago. Together, we made plans to cross the sea back to America. For Fabrizio, it would be for the first time, but for me and Jack, we would be returning home.

"You are lucky you have the tickets Jack, else I'm afraid I would have boarded Titanic and left you two," I said lightly, smiling up at Jack. My irritation with their tardiness had melted away at the sight of my friends.

"Yes, well, Emily, about that," Jack said, suddenly looking uneasy, "We have a slight problem. Fabrizio had I have, well, misplaced our tickets."

My smile faltered as I tried to decipher Jack's expression, for he had always been one to tease. My eyes flickered to Fabrizio, who looked aghast that half the blame had been put on him when clearly it was all Jack's fault.

"Misplaced? Jack, you didn't!"

"It wasn't entirely my fault!" Jack protested, "You see, Fabrizio thought that I had the tickets and I thought that he had the tickets," he tried to explain.

"Jack!" I said, struggling to keep my voice even, "Those tickets cost a fortune and you lost them! They were our only chance to America! How are we going to get home now?"

"Now, now Emily," Jack said, "Our Italian friend has a plan," Jack said and placed a hand on Fabrizio's shoulder. I turned to him.

"You see that bar over there, yes?" Fabrizio asked, pointing, "I overheard three Swedes talk of playing a game of poker before boarding the ship. If we can convince them of a game we can start the bid high; high enough so that they will only have their tickets left to place. If we win then we have our way back to America!" Fabrizio finished excitedly. It did nothing for my nerves.

"Fabrizio, you are terrible at poker," I said pointedly.

Fabrizio frowned dejectedly.

"Niente da perdere, Emily. We have a nothing to loose," Fabrizio reminded me, rolling his words together like he did.

I looked between Jack and Fabrizio, "Fine," I sighed. Though I didn't have much faith in their plan, Fabrizio had a point.

"Fantastic!" Jack cried happily and we pooled their money. Neither of us had very much, but together it made for a fair amount to start a high bet. I handed my money over to Jack, as I had no idea how to play poker, and we made our way towards the bar.

Within an hour into the game, the tickets had been placed as bets and I felt as though I was going to be sick from suspense. I sat at the bar and watched the five men play, Fabrizio, Jack and the Swedes. Most of the patrons in the bar watched too as the game neared the end. I was clueless as to who had the upper hand. The Swedes kept a solid poker face, as did Jack. Fabrizio struggled though, and I watched him wince when he drew another card. In the distance, the whistle to Titanic blew, the final warning. I bit at my bottom lip, a nervous habit that my grandmother had tried in vain to break.

"The moment of truth boys," Jack finally said, after drawing his last card, "Somebody's life's about to change. Olaf?"

One of the Swedes, Olaf, slapped down his cards.

"Nothing," Jack said with a pity shrug, turning to the other Swede, who also laid his cards down in defeat. My hope rose. We might actually stand a chance.

"Fabrizio?" Jack asked and Fabrizio laid down his cards, "Niente?"

"Niente," Fabrizio said bitterly in Italian, glancing at me. I gave him a half smile, trying to seem reassuring.

"Sven?" Jack asked, turning to the last Swede that had joined in the poker game. Looking fairly smug, he laid his cards down and Jack drew a sharp intake of breath, "Uh oh, two pair."

I felt my stomach knot and my hope dwindle. By the sounds of it, we had lost. I stood up and stepped closer to the table, ready to tell Jack off that this brilliant plan had failed, just as I had suspected.

"I'm sorry Fabrizio," Jack sighed, "but you won't be seeing your mother for a long time, and Emily say your goodbyes to your grandmother cause we're going to America!" Jack cried, throwing his cards onto the table and shouting triumphantly, "Full house boys!"

The bar erupted into cheers and Jack rose to his feet, reaching for the tickets, only to be stopped by Olaf. The Swede balled his fists, making to hit Jack in the face. Instead, he swung around and hit his companion, the one who had bet their tickets in a desperate attempt to get their money back. Jack laughed as Sven joined in, each yelling and chastening each other for their stupidity.

Fabrizio grabbed up the ticket and money, "It is destino!" he cried happily.

I couldn't contain myself. Fabrizio's plan had actually worked! We had won the game and I was going home!

"To America!" I shouted elatedly, flinging my arms around Fabrizio in the most unladylike fashion, "To my father!"

More cheers erupted and in all the excitement, Jack turned to me, cupping my face in his rough hands. He pulled me closer and then he crushed his lips to mine in a wet, sloppy, kiss, completely forgetting himself.

"We're going home!" he grinned, releasing me and turning to embrace Fabrizio, "We're practically goddamn royalty!"

I felt my face flush with Jack's forwardness, embarrassed. I touched my fingers to my lips, feeling them tingle from his kiss. My stomach fluttered again but this time it had nothing to do with nerves. Suddenly, winning the tickets was not all that exciting. Rather, the kiss was now occupying my thoughts. Jack seemed to think nothing of it, however, and he went on congratulating himself and Fabrizio.

"I am going to America!" Fabrizio gloated.

"No mate," the bar tender spoke up, having watched the whole scene unfold in front of him. He pointed to the clock on the wall, "Titanic goes to America. In five minutes!"

"Shit!" Jack cried, suddenly looked alarmed.

In all the chaos, we had forgotten that Titanic was on a schedule and would not wait for us. Jack and Fabrizio shoved their winnings into their bags while I grabbed my suitcase, my face still hot.

"Farewell Southampton!" I called as I dashed out the door of the bar after Fabrizio.

"It's been grand!" I heard Jack call behind me.

I followed Fabrizio, Jack bringing up the rear as we sprinted towards the wharf where Titanic was anchored. We moved through the port, dodging pedestrians, horses, carriages and luggage. I gathered up my skirts to keep from tripping over them as we weaved through throngs of people. Titanic loomed over us, taunting us as we raced to catch our ship to America. We ran along the wharf, emerging at E Deck where third class passengers were being boarded.

"Wait! We're passengers!" Jack called to the officers, waving the tickets. The ramp had been detached from the ship and was retracting to the wharf. Despite this, Fabrizio and Jack and I ran up it, Jack offering the tickets to the officer.

"Have you been through inspection queue?" the officer asked.

"Of course!" Jack lied, "Besides, we don't have lice. We're all Americans," he said, indicating to me and Fabrizio.

The officer nodded and indicated for us to board. We jumped the gap between the ship and the ramp, still giddy from our win at poker. I was happy the officer didn't bother to check the tickets, or else some questions would have been raised regarding why my ticket had the name of a Swedish man. We then made our way onto the deck, turning down one corridor, then another.

"We're the luckiest sons of bitches in the world!" Jack said, nudging Fabrizio. I cleared my throat loudly behind Jack, who turned and grinned at me.

"I didn't forget you, Emily," he said, "Though I do believe you weren't the one playing the poker round which decided our fate, now were you?"

I rolled my eyes but grinned. We finally made our way to the top deck at the back of the ship, after wandering through a maze of white hallways. Jack tossed down his things, climbing up on the railing, pretending to way goodbye like the rest of the passengers. Soon, Fabrizio and I joined him though we had no one to say our goodbyes to.

Titanic was the main attraction of the port, all eyes were on her. The other boats in the wharf didn't even compare to her grand scale. The mooring lines were detached from Titanic and the large ship was tugged from the Southampton port.

We were on our way.

With Southampton behind us, the passengers of Titanic made their way to their cabins to settle in. I gathered my things, as did Fabrizio and Jack and we moved down to E Deck. Jack and Fabrizio led me to my room, the room I would have had, had Jack not lost our original tickets.

"We'll take the rooms the Swede's had," Jack explained, setting down my suitcase, "We'll come find you once we've unpacked."

I nodded and waved them off, watching Jack and Fabrizio disappear down the corridor. I entered my cabin. It was a little cramped, but nice for third class accommodations. The walls were left white and barren, the beds covered with either dark grey or navy sheets. There were two bunks, four beds, a basin for washing up and a closet. I set my things down on the top bunk and started on my unpacking.

I hung my dresses in the closet, which, like the rest of the room was small. I didn't bring much with me. Clothes and money, though that had gone to our poker game, a few pictures of London, a stack of old letters and my journal.

I couldn't believe that I, Emily Cross, was aboard the Ship of Dreams. I had always been envious of the adventures Jack wrote me in his letters, but now, I was part of my own adventure. I couldn't have been happier.

My grandmother didn't want me to go to America. She concocted every possible excuse to try and keep me in London; I had needed more schooling, in her old age she needed me to take care of her, it would be frowned upon crossing the ocean with two men, the tickets were too expensive and the list went on. I insisted that, at eighteen, it was time I returned to America with my father. She never gave me a firm yes, but she and I both knew that once I had my mind set on something, there was no deterring me.

I had woke early in the morning and wrote my grandmother a letter, leaving it in the kitchen. I told her that I had made a decision and I was leaving with Jack and Fabrizio. I told her that there was really nothing she could say to keep me in London and that I would write to her when Titanic docked in America. I slipped out of the house before she even woke.

That's how I ended up in Southampton and later aboard the Titanic.

I had a feeling my grandmother would post a letter to my father as soon as she read my note. She'd probably convince him to send me back to London. Try as they might, I wouldn't go. I had been away from home long enough.

A while later there was a knock at the door and a young woman entered. I guess she was one of my roommates. She took the bunk below me. She was a petit girl, with hazel eyes and fair blonde hair. She seemed very nice but didn't speak any English. She was Norwegian, I think, though I couldn't be sure. I tried to question her about her excursion to America, but it was not going well.

"Are you traveling alone?" I asked loudly, as if our language barrier affected her hearing. I cleared my throat, slightly embarrassed.

She looked at me puzzled before saying, "Tilgivelse? Tilgi meg, men jeg snakker ikke engelsk."

"My name is Emily Cross," I said slowly, pointing to myself, "And you?" I pointed to her.

"Ah!" the woman exclaimed and pointed to herself, "Helga Dahl."

We smiled at each other, triumphant in conquering the language barrier. Though it was only our names, it was good enough for me. It wasn't long before another knock came to the door. Jack and Fabrizio came for me just as promised.

"Come Emily! We have to show you Titanic! It is emozionante!" Fabrizio said as I opened the door. His gaze sliding past me and into the room. His smiled suddenly widened, a blush making its way to his cheeks. I looked over my shoulder to see what he was looking at. It was Helga Dahl, who was also looking over at Fabrizio with the same, timid expression. I laughed gently and slipped out of the room, closing the door behind me. It seemed this was not the first time the two had passed each other.

I felt myself grinning, "Lead the way my good men," I teased.

"Follow us," Jack replied.

We explored the labyrinth that was Titanic. It had everything. There was a library, which I vowed to look over in detail later, dining rooms, bars, general rooms, barber stations and a gymnasium. I was impressed to say the least. Somehow we managed to find our way back up to promenade deck. It was sunny and bright, with a warm breeze wafting off the ocean as Titanic made her way to Ireand. Jack sat on one of the wooden lounge chairs while Fabrizio and I took the deck bench. Fabrizio was telling me about Italy and his family there. As he spoke, I stole a glance at Jack out of the corner of my eye. He was scribbling away furiously at the sketchpad, his hands moving over the paper with sure strokes.

Suddenly reminded of his brash kiss, I blushed. I seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

Damn you Jack. Damn you and damn the emotions that make me love you so, I thought.

I hadn't always felt that way. In fact, when Jack and I first met, I loathed him. He had always made fun of me and my awkwardness. I had been a gangly fifteen year old with a little nose and big doe eyes. We eventually grew out of badgering each other and when Jack came back to London those few months ago with Fabrizio in tow, I had seen a change in him. He was older, more mature. Still playful as ever, but in a less obnoxious way. I had grown to like the new Jack, a lot.

Jack looked up from his paper at me and grinned wickedly, catching me watching him. He pointed to Fabrizio, indicating to me that I needed to turn my head back to its previous position. I stuck my tongue out at him before doing as I was told. Had grandmother seen my behavior today, she would have had a fit over how unladylike I was. I stole another look to see Jack bent over the paper, drawing me and Fabrizio. I smiled again and looked back at Fabrizio, nodding as he talked about the orchard that he helped his father and brothers raise.

"In the spring the house would smell like oranges," Fabrizio explained, "and the oranges that were not good to sell, we would use as baseballs and see who could hit them the farthest from the orchard."

"Sounds lovely," I commented, "Are you going to miss your family Fabrizio?"

"Yes Emily, I will, but I when I get to America, I will work hard and earn enough money to send for my fratelli, my madre and my padre."

"That's very kind of you Fabrizio," I said.

We lapsed into a moment of silence before Jack spoke up.

"It's hard to believe your grandmother let you board Titanic. She was bent on you not coming."

I gave a chastened smile, "Not exactly," I replied, "I left a note early this morning and snuck out before she was awake."

Jack raised his eyebrows, though I wasn't sure why. He, of all people, should have known that that was a typical Emily Cross move. Fabrizio, on the other hand, chuckled at my boorish actions.

Jack clicked his tongue at me disapprovingly, "What will your grandmother think of little Emily running away onto the Ship of Dreams with her best friend and an Italian whose practically a stranger?"

I laughed, "I've not doubt I've put her in the hospital from all the shame I brought on the family."

We dissolved into ridiculous laughter once again.

Titanic docked in Cherbourg, France for an hour or so to pick up more passengers later that day. After that, she took off on her maiden voyage. With one stop in Ireland the next morning, Titanic would be headed to America.

Jack, Fabrizio and I made our way to the bow of the ship once she was off again. They jogged ahead of me, taking hold of the cables that were attached to the bow, and looked out. Jack offered his hand and helped me mount the front of the ship. The sight took my breath away. It was nothing but ocean in front of us, as far as the eye could see. I could see the curve of the world from my position. The wind whipped at my dress and hair, pulling it free from its pins and the air was thick with salt when I breathed in.

"I can see the Statue of Liberty already!" Fabrizio's voice pulled me from my thoughts, "It is very small of course."

Jack and I laughed.

"Look!" Jack shouted excitedly, tugging Fabrizio's sleeve. I looked where he was pointing, down, and saw what he was looking at.

"Dolphins!" I cried. I had never seen dolphins before and while the animals amused Jack and Fabrizio, I was absolutely frivolous at the sight of them. I watched as the dolphins raced Titanic, jumping the surf that the ships bow created.

Jack mounted the railings, making himself taller.

"I'm king of the world!" Jack yelped, throwing his fists into the air. He crowed and laughed.

"Jack!" I scolded, but found myself laughing.

Jack looked down at me, pure joy lighting up his handsome features. He howled again and Fabrizio laughed, joining in. I shrugged my shoulders and threw my head back, adding to the chorus of happy crows.

I looked out as the sun slowly dipped below the horizon, bathing the ships wood in a deep red. I grinned to myself. I was aboard Titanic with the man who was quickly stealing my heart, a dear friend, and only a few days before I would see America and my father again. There was no doubt in my mind that Titanic was indeed the Ship of Dreams. Nothing could ruin the bliss of this adventure.

Or so I thought