Disclaimer: Once Upon A Time belongs to ABC.

So apparently I'm into the idea of Snow and Charming getting caught almost having sex in stupid places throughout their castle. I just... I don't even know.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Snow White froze. She glanced guiltily toward the doorway to find her husband leaning on the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest and one eyebrow quirked up.

Snow heaved a flustered sigh and let go of the sword she had just buried in a wooden training dummy. It stuck there, the blade jammed in the dummy's shoulder, and its arm fell off. Snow grimaced and took an awkward step away from her wooden victim.

"I was just…" she began, gesturing toward the dummy. It fell over with a loud clatter, and she winced.

David snorted with laughter, no longer able to keep up the ruse of being disappointed to find her in one of the castle's training yards, laying into a training dummy with a sword she had clearly swiped from one of the guards. He could hardly blame her. He wouldn't trade their peaceful life for anything, but it didn't exactly help keep him in shape. Snow put her hands on her hips with a petulant frown.

"That wasn't very charming, Charming," she pointed out, and her pout turned into a smirk. She approached him slowly across the empty courtyard, an innocent look in her eyes that he didn't trust for a second. He met her halfway and she wrapped her arms around his neck immediately, pulling herself up on her toes and bringing her lips within inches of his. "What does a girl have to do to get some time to herself around here?"

David smiled, and she let out a quiet laugh. Their lips still hovered maddeningly close, but neither gave in just yet.

"Time to yourself, huh?" he replied lowly. "Is that what you call this? It looked to me like you were massacring an innocent scarecrow."

Snow felt herself blushing, her skin on fire for having him so close. But she wouldn't let him win. She would make him come to her. He seemed to sense her resolve, as he laid his hands on her hips and pressed his fingers into the soft skin there. She inhaled sharply, and he smirked at her.

So that was how he was going to play.

She tilted her head slightly, her nose brushing his, and ran one of her hands up into his hair.

"Well, being a princess is much stuffier than I remember," she whispered, every word tickling him with her sweet breath. "I told one of my maids I was going to the training yard and she nearly had a heart attack."

"A princess with a sword?" David scoffed, highly affronted. "The very idea."

"Truly vulgar," Snow replied, her voice a low purr that made David shiver. She moved abruptly, slipping around behind him and leaving him blinking in surprise. But then her hands were light on his shoulders, and he felt her nose brush the side of his neck as she took a deep breath of him. He stiffened, and she laughed. "What sort of world do we live in where a princess runs around in the forest fighting trolls and rescuing princes?"

And with that, Snow grabbed his sword and stepped around in front of him in one fluid motion, leveling the blade at his chest and smirking at him.

David stared at her with his mouth hanging open. Snow laughed.

"How do you expect to win a kiss from me without a weapon?" she taunted, tossing the sword to him. He caught it deftly despite his shock as she backed away from him. She stopped beside the fallen dummy and yanked her borrowed blade free.

"You can't really expect me to fight you," David said seriously, taking a step toward her.

Snow lifted her sword between them, a challenge in her eyes. "What's wrong? Afraid you'll lose?" she asked with a grin.

"Afraid one of us will get hurt," he replied with a frown.

Snow quirked an eyebrow at him. "I'll be gentle," she purred. And that was all the warning he got before she struck.

David raised his sword to block her blow, and steel clanged on steel. He stumbled back in surprise, his arm stinging from the strength of her swing.

"Do you admit defeat already?" she laughed.

David studied her for a moment. Her cheeks were flushed, and she seemed to be genuinely having fun. They had been officially married, officially in charge of the kingdom, and officially living in the castle for nearly a month now. It had been a startling change for both of them after fighting for so long. He could tell Snow had been bored, missing her life in the forest. Although they weren't the best circumstances, at least she had some freedom. David certainly knew the difference, having lived his whole life in freedom until being forced into royalty.

So he sighed and shook his head before he held up his sword and smiled at her. "Admit defeat?" he repeated. "Never."

She grinned and came at him again, striking so fast that he had to assume this wasn't the first time she had snuck off to practice on her own. This was just the first time he had caught her.

It was some time before another break in the action occurred. They stood facing each other, both panting and grinning. They had been matched nearly blow for blow, but every so often one of them snuck in a solid hit. Luckily they were both well-trained enough with the blades to avoid slicing each other to ribbons. That didn't mean they wouldn't both have a fair amount of bruises in the morning, but they didn't seem to mind.

"Well I must say, Prince Charming," Snow said between breaths. "You put up quite a fight."

"So the kingdom concedes?" David replied airily.

"Never," Snow smirked.

"Alright, I didn't want to do this, but you've forced my hand," David sighed with a shrug. The smile didn't leave Snow's face, but her eyebrows drew down in confusion.

David moved in a flash, and before Snow knew what hit her, her sword was clattering across the courtyard and he had her pinned against the wall, the flat of his blade at her throat. She stared at him wide-eyed, gasping for breath. He grinned at her and sheathed his sword, though he didn't back away from her.

When she got over her shock, she started laughing. He was never able to resist her laughter, so he was soon laughing with her. When their giggles eventually quieted, Snow met David's eyes in a smoldering gaze.

"Well done, Prince Charming," Snow said lowly, eyes never leaving his. "It seems I'm at your mercy." She trailed her fingertips up his arms to his shoulders, feeling the tension leave his muscles as she did so. Her hands came to a rest at the nape of his neck, tugging him a bit closer. She tilted her head and leaned close, brushing her nose against his. But she didn't move any closer, and neither did he.

"After all that, you're still going to make me come to you?" he whispered, grabbing her by the hips and pulling her firmly against him. She gasped, and he grinned triumphantly.

"Alright," she breathed, the smile never leaving her face. "I guess I'll meet you halfway."

They both leaned in that last few inches, lips meeting in the middle in a fervent kiss. They were both a bit of a mess, sweaty and tired, and Snow had accidentally nicked his arm with her sword so he was bleeding, but none of that mattered now.

For all people said about True Love being pure and beautiful, it was also painfully intense. Snow and Charming burned for each other, and it was only at times like this that they felt truly alive, truly together.

Snow felt like she was on fire when he touched her like this, his hands running up her sides, his mouth hot on hers. Sometimes he was so careful with her, like she was made of glass, but now he was anything but gentle as he pressed her against the wall behind her. She responded in kind, digging her fingers into his shoulders and wrapping her legs snugly around his waist. He moaned when she shifted her hips against his, his lips leaving hers, and she let out a breathy laugh.

"Not fair," he growled, meeting her eyes briefly. She just smirked at him. She loved that darkness in his gaze, that passion, that hunger for her. She loved that she could do that to him and that no one else could.

"What do you plan to do about it?" she purred, nipping at his lower lip.

He smirked at her, and it made her heart pound.

Without another word, he lowered his lips to her neck, drawing a gasp from her. His tongue traveled over the sensitive skin of her throat, and then up her jawline to that little place behind her ear that made her-

The sound that came from Snow was something between a gasp and a moan, and it carried across the silent courtyard. David pulled back to look at her, her eyes hazy and her cheeks flushed, and he grinned.

"That," he replied smugly. She glared at him and took his face in her hands, dragging his lips back to hers, and at that point things were about to get really out of hand.

But the distant sound of footsteps brought them to a stop. Someone was approaching.

Snow groaned and David let out a frustrated sigh. He pulled his lips from hers and dropped his head into the crook between her neck and shoulder, where he proceeded to mutter a few choice words. She laughed breathlessly and unwound her legs from around his waist.

"Come on," she murmured, placing her hands on his chest and giving him a firm push. He took a step back from her, scowling, and she couldn't help but laugh again at the look on his face. "What, were you really going to take me right here in the courtyard?"

David blushed and looked away.

"Oh now you're embarrassed," Snow laughed. Her good mood was infectious, and it only took a moment for a smile to replace his scowl, though he fought it as hard as he could. She grinned at him as she stepped away from the wall, placing her hands on his shoulders and giving him a quick, soft kiss. "We can always just… continue elsewhere."

Just at that moment, Red came running into the courtyard.

"Oh, it's you two," she sighed in relief. They both turned to look at her, confused. "One of the maids heard a noise around here, she said it sounded like-"

Red stopped midsentence. She stared at them, eyes narrowing as they both glanced away guiltily.

"Oh come on!" Red blurted, throwing her hands up in the air. Snow tried unsuccessfully to stifle her laughter. Red glared at her. "You two have a whole castle! But somehow I always end up catching you out in stupid places like this!" Snow tried her hardest to look ashamed of herself, but she wasn't successful with that either. David was just trying not to look Red in the eye.

Red finally just sighed in exasperation and shook her head. "Just… go someplace with a door, would you?" she grumbled as she stomped out of sight.

As soon as she was gone, Snow and David both burst out laughing.